Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

so...I had a thought...I know HP loves me, looks out for me and gives me what I need when I need it. So......why then is it so much easier to focus on what my parents did to me or didn't do for me then it is to focus on how I know God is always with me and gives me what I need. Any thoughts?

JenniferN · JenniferN

I was just going through the caller ID and noticed he deleted her number. WHY? am I being paranoid? am I letting my hormones get the better of me? or is it the unmistakeable gut feeling that something is wrong here? I called my sponsor, no answer. I don't know what to do. I have this urge to call her and find o...

DeadOrAlive · DeadOrAlive

My sixteen year old came home drunk this am. He was sleeping over at a friends' house (supposidly). And I heard my AH yelling at him and part of his words were "you betrayed my trust". Hah some kind of bitter satisfaction as I have used those words against him and he has twisted them back at m...

glad · glad

Friday, BF got some bad news, he reacted like he always does and "made sad puppy dog eyes" saying he would deal with it but of course remaining so "sad and down". I of course reacted to his feelings and wanted to "fix" (control) the situation. Gosh I'm still learnin...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I have gone from saying way too much, to almost being speechless when I am around my sober husband. He is finally opening his eyes to the wreck our life has become. Long story not as long, he sat me down today and asked about how I was doing financially. Basically, I told him I was working all I could and ga...

DeadOrAlive · DeadOrAlive

Sadly I have been in the grip of the obsessive search for "evidence" for about a month (ouch!). And really, why? It was 2 weeks ago that my AH again fell prey to his demons. Supposidly a bottom. yeah. I hate this, and haven't done it for years but it is back with a vengence. Honestly I am try...

debilyn · debilyn

When high stress hits me, helping my very loved old dogs in their death, sobbing because I just lost my old man potted pig Walter yesterday, something is horribly heavy but I have to do it. When I ran out to help tucker, there was Walter dieing.He is over 100 pounds.I prayed to Jehovah,please help me, I pi...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

Tugg brought up this great question which has been rising from many spots laterly, Carolina Girl, etc. How do we love those that are hard to love? We can choose not to love them or we can choose to love them anyway. Maybe its also about how do you practice unconditional love and acceptance or is it even pos...

JenniferN · JenniferN

I really am trying to work this program. I'm trying to detach and not "fix" him this weekend. And so far, I'm doing pretty good, despite the PMS and the uncontrollable urge I've had for the past 45 mins. to scream my head off about the recent phone call from "HER". He's been "d...

Heartbroken · Heartbroken

For some time now I have been wrestling with silence. I have been afraid of silence, I have been disappointed by silence, I have thought that I was utterly forgotten and I was not prepared to sit, wait and listen through the silence any longer, for I wanted answers and I wanted them after the count of thr...

MIDGET · MIDGET

So I evicted my AH and filed for a divorce.He was full blown,lost his job,laying around drinking all day.Got so drunk he peed on himself while laying on the couch (yuk !!).So he cashes in his stocks and goes to Fl to help his dying Brother. He recieved the divorce papers,and he said he wont fight me on any...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am a little drained but am hanging in there! Yesterday I went to one of our larger towns that is 60 miles away and my AH was kinda impatient. I needed a pair of black shoes and he got a little frustrated! We walked through the mall to get the shoes. Anyway, he hates when I get shoes, go figure? He figured tha...

getoverit · getoverit

bro in law needs prayers re open heart by pass surg t u n love n namaste getoverit

cookie1971 · cookie1971

((((Family)))) I tried to post a new thread after the"meeting" on Wed. nite, but I was quite ill both Wed nite and Thurs. so I never got a chance to finish it. When I got home from work on Wed. my AH was in a foul mood. I determined that I was not going to mention the meeting, and that if he still wa...

Christy · Christy

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Tea!!!!! [youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=yj6cbM-h8xg]

debilyn · debilyn

I finally made steps and am taking care of stressors. Had to put my two very old dogs down a few days ago. Tedirug and Herbert Hudson are no longer in pain and constantly starting fights. I have not slept all night for almost a year. Had to let them out allll the time,plus they woke me up grumbling. So I hav...

Aloha · Aloha

Ugh. Feeling down right now. Just when I finished my last post here, my AH calls me on my work line. First thing out of his mouth is "I've been trying to call you on your cell but you're not answering!" Sometimes my phone just gets into a dead spot and it won't ring. Sometimes I just don't hea...

search41 · search41

i havent been here in quite some time, but when i clicked on the chat room, it wont load for me. i get the little white square with the red x on the top left corner. does anyone know why that might be happening? obviously, the message board opens for me, but the chat room wont.... thanks in advance! searc...

glad · glad

"To forgive the unrepentant is like drawing pictures in a pond" (thanks Jennifer) He is sick, the reason I put up with it, danced a dance to try to fix it, turned myself inside out worrying about it, embarrassed myself over and over begging for it to be different was/ is because I "caug...

serendipity · serendipity

I am posting this mainly to document it. The 2 younger ones and I were at dinner. On the placemat were questions to start discussions. What would you do if you were president, if you had 3 wishes, if you could have a wild animal, etc. The last one was if you could go back in time where would you go and why. My l...

Codependent · Codependent

I feel like I should apologize at the beginning of my posts now because so much of it feels like I am "dumping" on you all. Yet, I need to be able to tell you all the truth of what is going on in my life. So with that in mind, The A did get 50 days in lock down. Some guy in jail called to tell me this with...

nmike · nmike

Listening to the Osmonds Reunion concert. Marie and Donny are singing "It takes two". I miss my AHsober. We went skiing together - his idea. He said it will be fun. It was. Just like old times. Then we went south to golf and warm up after this wicked winter. My idea. I said it will be fun. It was. N...

david62 · david62

(((Family))) I came on here to post about the topic of forgiveness and lo and behold I see Glad's post "to forgive the unrepentent" . Forgiveness was the topic of my ftf meeting last nite. We read pages 86 and 87 in "How Al-Anon Works for Families & Friends of Alcoholics". An...

JenniferN · JenniferN

I was pretty upset this morning when I came on here. I didn't want to post about what had happened, and I'm still not going to, because it's quite personal. So, I started reading. And I started with glad's post. That got me to thinking in a different direction and I posted my reply and with doing that, with...

optimistundone · optimistundone

I filed for divorce a month ago after months of agonizing and therapy, and years of making excuses. It was the hardest thing that I have ever done. I hate the fact that it has been difficult on my daughter. Yes, I have to carefully watch every penny. Yes, I have to lean on others. My XH is not happy with...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Family!! This is a must share for me so that I can relieve the awareness pressure from my spirit that the disease has brought. My wife and I attended a wake and viewing this morning for a young (40) man who died as a result of cancer. They were friends from my wife's work place who had moved to Nev 7 yea...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I actually went to a meeting without my mom on Tuesday! I feel so great about it because I rarely go to meetings without her because of the fact that there are very few meetings in our town and she feels she needs to go to all of them so where does that leave me? Anyway, I went to a huge Alanon meeting 60 miles a...

Maria123 · Maria123

I just had to share this with y'all. This Mom just had to be an Alanoner laughter in recovery, Maria HAVING MOM OVER FOR DINNERYou don't even have to be a mother to enjoy this one..Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, Brian's mother couldn't help but notice how beauti...

glad · glad

My wanting to "help" my "A" ( by nagging, begging, "explaining" (loudly) healthy thinking) has been totally selfish. My way to try to excape my own "double bind" I put myself in, which is: I don't want to be in an unhealthy relationship, but I do want to be w...

qhgirl · qhgirl

I am new to alanon although not new to alcoholism. My boyfriend is an alcoholic. Last weekend he was given a DUI and spent the night in jail. MUCH to his credit he has not drank since. He is really trying to stop drinking. He has been to two AA meetings and has an appointment with his therapist on Thursday. I...

JenniferN · JenniferN

Had a pretty rough start this morning...I asked him last night to make sure I was up this morning when he got home from work (7a.m.)...he did(n't)... he said ONE thing to me this morning to wake me up...and that doesn't work...I was pretty upset when I finally woke up 40 minutes later. I told him that I was...

Aloha · Aloha

I had a testing moment this evening when I got home from work. My AH was out on the driveway washing his bike and his moped. I went inside for a bit, and then came across something that needed to be put in the garage, so I went to the garage to put that something away and noticed one of our good bath towels han...

omajoy · omajoy

This morning I wrote about being angry and had every intention of having a successful day of even temperament. It is twelve hours later. My heart is breaking in half and I don't know if I am angry or just what I am feeling. Grandbaby and son here this afternoon. Marigolds planted. Lots of love and hugs an...

JenniferN · JenniferN

Just wanted to say thanks to ya'll for the ESH and to let ya'll know that I did apologize to him when I got home. I thought about it more after my post and realized it wasn't really that important to be/stay upset over. So, I amitted I was wrong, apologized, and moved on! (oh and I'll be using the alarm on my ce...

grizmom · grizmom

I am married to an alcoholic who is presently in an intensive rehab provided by the Department of Corrections - a special program for DUI felonly offenders. He is due to be released soon, coming home to family and job, under the watch of probation. He recently asked what he could do to make our marriage...

glad · glad

Well I have discovered over the last few days I may want to do some things just because I want to. I just realized that in the (recent) past I have had some really weird thoughts in my head. Examples: I'll clean the house really good today, maybe light some candles (my boyfriend will like it when he c...

NewMom07 · NewMom07

If he gets drunk while he is suppose to care for our 3-month-old daughter, should I leave him? He has never been physically abusive, but is emotionally abusive to me when he is drunk. He suffers from depression. His father is also an Alcoholic, and encourages him to drink. He admits he has a problem and...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

A few months ago I had my granddaughter overnight, and had to take her to her mother's the next day (my alcoholic/addict 30 year old daughter). The daughter had been out of jail for some time, and was living with a new 'bf', someone she had met through the small church she's been attending since she's bee...

silverbrumby · silverbrumby

I am a support worker and go into homes of those who are frail because of illness or age. Most of my clients are dying of preventable diseases and the ones who confront me the most of course are those dying of alcoholism. Some have wives who are nursing them and others are alone with their television sets...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

Last night I was a speaker at an al-anon meeting. Its kind of my home group. I was really scared. I mean, I have done a ton of public speaking but this was really different. It was super hard but I did it and I shared some things that were very personal and very painful. It really brought some stuff back up for...

JenniferN · JenniferN

Having just finished an email to my sponsor because I felt it was too late to call, I thought I'd share some good things that happened yesterday/today. ****side note first: you all are COMPLETELY AWESOME!!!**** I've been thinking the past couple of days how funny typing "my A" or "th...

glad · glad

okay silly question / post about boundries, but just in case you guys never hear from me again you'll know why- (kidding I promise) BF ask me/ offered for me to use his truck to go to my work appointments because my car is really dangerous at the moment, something wrong with axel. In his truck at last minu...

debilyn · debilyn

Been working on,ok what would make me feel better inside. So doing stuff here to make my home not such a muck up Today I drove from stupid Mapquests directions to pick up a ewe an ewe? wierd, anyway,got sorta lost.drove up, I mean UP this winding steep road wayyyyyyy up to the sky, truck ran out of gas.wond...

omajoy · omajoy

I have had some discussions recently with my counselor about anger. It seems that is the emotion I am most frequently experiencing lately...the one which undoes me in my quest for recovery and peace. He has gently pointed out to me that I have lots of reasons to be angry at the world the past months. My...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I have been thinking a lot lately about what this really means in general, and specifically to me in my life. I think a lot of times courage is about getting past crippling fears and doing what is right. Then other times courage is doing the right thing even though it's not what I want to do or it's not com...

round3 · round3

I've had 3 1/2 months with little to no contact from my A. During this time, I've discovered (and rediscovered) some things about myself. Thanks to this board and the program, I have opened up my eyes to lots of truths. I'm still digesting some of them and learning so many important things. So I go out...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Things are getting better slowly but surely. I am starting to let go of some of my character defects that are coming back to me lately. I mean past experiences are reminding me how truly "imperfect" I am. I am letting go of the need to control others, how I tend to be in the "all about m...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

((((Family)))) Having a discussion with the AH today, and he comes up with "Didn't you say your meeting also has AA on Wednesday Night?" So I say yes it does. Then he says I think I'll go with you tomorrow night. Hmmm. Mind you now, this man has attended only 2 AA meetings so far, so I'm not reall...

Joy · Joy

... and I don't want to be here. I am tired of being "sick" too! I'm not an alcoholic. I don't stay out all night. If anything, I am overly responsible! Tell me again... why am I "sick" too. I am sick... sick and tired. Fed up. Angry as hell! My first post here... and just needin...

Aloha · Aloha

I'm just feeling so much better now that I released my perceived "control" over my AH's drinking. That was, of course, threatening him that I'd leave if he drank again. Now... this doesn't mean that I'm not still figuring out my boundaries. I DO have to draw the line at some point. But I'm n...

Aloha · Aloha

I'm just blown away at how quickly my HP responds and sends me answers and relief. At times, my life is like those V8 commercials. Have you seen them? Some person will be filling their plate with bread and meat and then someone will come along and bonk them on the forehead for not including any vegetabl...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I just wanted to share that my daughter (13) came into my room Sunday night at 4am - guess it was more like monday morning - and said she coundn't breathe. Then she got her inhaler and took a puff or two. She said her throat hurt so I took her in the bathroom and turned on the light and tried to get her to stick...

maresie · maresie

I think I always seem to be reporting some disaster or another but I am actually working super hard to get to better self care. I managed in the short period of time I was unemployed (I am grateful for that even though I really could have done with a longer break) and get some medication I really needed. I ha...

Maria123 · Maria123

PARENT Job Description This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way, I don't believe any of us would have done it!!!! POSITION : Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma Dad , Dad dy, Dad a, Pa, Pop JOB DESCRIPTION : Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work i n an often chaotic environment...

Maria123 · Maria123

(((((((((((((((((Ash aka Lauren aka Ashbaby)))))))))))))))))))))) Happy Birthday Girl. I hope your day was wonderful. Love ya, Maria

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

All I can say really is that today is better than yesterday! I just keep plugging away and it seems like I am doing a little better day by day. I just need to let go of some things and clear the clutter from my mind and my own personal space. I guess it is almost time for some Spring cleaning. The snow is melti...

glad · glad

Okay besides the fact that I have got to get over my excitement about finding this relief to my pain of last few years and get some balance in my life, I mean I've go to get my work done sometime (more specifics on what I'm so happy about in my post response to "hp sure does work fast") but I'm tryi...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Last week I was thinking about how my 2 older kids needed dressers in their rooms. My daughter has 2 small ones which cannot hold all the clothes she has strewn about her room (lots of hand-me-downs from a cousin) and my son has been supposed to use the shelves in his closet, but doesn't. I kick myself for g...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I just think that one of our members brought up an excellent topic recently and that is the issue of staying or leaving our A's. I wanted to bring it up in its own string because we seem to really get hung up on this staying/leaving "ZONE" and thinking that we can somehow control our A's by makin...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Living with the family disease of alcoholism is like going down a mountain... pretty easy to keep slipping further down. Recovering from this same disease is like going back up the mountain. It can be done... but it takes endurance and time and having the proper knowledge to know when to take a breat...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Making HP my parent/Thia ia WorkInProgress (Preview) so...I had a thought...I know HP loves me, looks out for me and gives me what I need when I need it. So......why then is it so much easier to focus on what my parents did to me or didn't do for me then it is to focus on how I know God is always with me and gives me what I need. Any thoughts?	seekingserenity	2	594	Mar 17, 2008 by Jerry F
	resisting an urge...... (Preview) I was just going through the caller ID and noticed he deleted her number. WHY? am I being paranoid? am I letting my hormones get the better of me? or is it the unmistakeable gut feeling that something is wrong here? I called my sponsor, no answer. I don't know what to do. I have this urge to call her and find o...	JenniferN	9	497	Mar 17, 2008 by canadianguy
	And so it comes full circle (Preview) My sixteen year old came home drunk this am. He was sleeping over at a friends' house (supposidly). And I heard my AH yelling at him and part of his words were "you betrayed my trust". Hah some kind of bitter satisfaction as I have used those words against him and he has twisted them back at m...	DeadOrAlive	7	528	Mar 17, 2008 by canadianguy
	I've blown it all weekend! (Preview) Friday, BF got some bad news, he reacted like he always does and "made sad puppy dog eyes" saying he would deal with it but of course remaining so "sad and down". I of course reacted to his feelings and wanted to "fix" (control) the situation. Gosh I'm still learnin...	glad	5	695	Mar 17, 2008 by ESH
	and the pendulum swings... (Preview) I have gone from saying way too much, to almost being speechless when I am around my sober husband. He is finally opening his eyes to the wreck our life has become. Long story not as long, he sat me down today and asked about how I was doing financially. Basically, I told him I was working all I could and ga...	Loupiness	7	405	Mar 17, 2008 by carolinagirl
	The obsessive search (Preview) Sadly I have been in the grip of the obsessive search for "evidence" for about a month (ouch!). And really, why? It was 2 weeks ago that my AH again fell prey to his demons. Supposidly a bottom. yeah. I hate this, and haven't done it for years but it is back with a vengence. Honestly I am try...	DeadOrAlive	6	480	Mar 17, 2008 by carolinagirl
	Do ya'll do this? (Preview) When high stress hits me, helping my very loved old dogs in their death, sobbing because I just lost my old man potted pig Walter yesterday, something is horribly heavy but I have to do it. When I ran out to help tucker, there was Walter dieing.He is over 100 pounds.I prayed to Jehovah,please help me, I pi...	debilyn	6	477	Mar 17, 2008 by Heartbroken
	How do we love those that are hard to love? (Preview) Tugg brought up this great question which has been rising from many spots laterly, Carolina Girl, etc. How do we love those that are hard to love? We can choose not to love them or we can choose to love them anyway. Maybe its also about how do you practice unconditional love and acceptance or is it even pos...	Jean4444	7	734	Mar 17, 2008 by Jen
	I'm trying.... (Preview) I really am trying to work this program. I'm trying to detach and not "fix" him this weekend. And so far, I'm doing pretty good, despite the PMS and the uncontrollable urge I've had for the past 45 mins. to scream my head off about the recent phone call from "HER". He's been "d...	JenniferN	1	562	Mar 16, 2008 by Jerry F
	A human being, not a human doing... (Preview) For some time now I have been wrestling with silence. I have been afraid of silence, I have been disappointed by silence, I have thought that I was utterly forgotten and I was not prepared to sit, wait and listen through the silence any longer, for I wanted answers and I wanted them after the count of thr...	Heartbroken	7	590	Mar 16, 2008 by Heartbroken
	just needing a little support (Preview) So I evicted my AH and filed for a divorce.He was full blown,lost his job,laying around drinking all day.Got so drunk he peed on himself while laying on the couch (yuk !!).So he cashes in his stocks and goes to Fl to help his dying Brother. He recieved the divorce papers,and he said he wont fight me on any...	MIDGET	11	754	Mar 16, 2008 by Tuggboat
	A little drained! (Preview) I am a little drained but am hanging in there! Yesterday I went to one of our larger towns that is 60 miles away and my AH was kinda impatient. I needed a pair of black shoes and he got a little frustrated! We walked through the mall to get the shoes. Anyway, he hates when I get shoes, go figure? He figured tha...	Hoot Nanny	3	478	Mar 15, 2008 by cookie1971
	bro in law surg prayers pls (Preview) bro in law needs prayers re open heart by pass surg t u n love n namaste getoverit	getoverit	6	521	Mar 15, 2008 by cookie1971
	UPDATE ON "THE MEETING" (Preview) ((((Family)))) I tried to post a new thread after the"meeting" on Wed. nite, but I was quite ill both Wed nite and Thurs. so I never got a chance to finish it. When I got home from work on Wed. my AH was in a foul mood. I determined that I was not going to mention the meeting, and that if he still wa...	cookie1971	6	547	Mar 15, 2008 by cookie1971
	HAPPY BIRTHDAY ................. (Preview) HAPPY BIRTHDAY Tea!!!!! [youtube=http://youtube.com/watch?v=yj6cbM-h8xg]	Christy	9	488	Mar 15, 2008 by tea2
	Was feeling wierd (Preview) I finally made steps and am taking care of stressors. Had to put my two very old dogs down a few days ago. Tedirug and Herbert Hudson are no longer in pain and constantly starting fights. I have not slept all night for almost a year. Had to let them out allll the time,plus they woke me up grumbling. So I hav...	debilyn	7	575	Mar 15, 2008 by Tuggboat
	Why do I open my mouth sometimes... (Preview) Ugh. Feeling down right now. Just when I finished my last post here, my AH calls me on my work line. First thing out of his mouth is "I've been trying to call you on your cell but you're not answering!" Sometimes my phone just gets into a dead spot and it won't ring. Sometimes I just don't hea...	Aloha	4	517	Mar 15, 2008 by Tuggboat
	cant get in chat room (Preview) i havent been here in quite some time, but when i clicked on the chat room, it wont load for me. i get the little white square with the red x on the top left corner. does anyone know why that might be happening? obviously, the message board opens for me, but the chat room wont.... thanks in advance! searc...	search41	2	470	Mar 15, 2008 by Maria123
	To forgive the unrepentant... (Preview) "To forgive the unrepentant is like drawing pictures in a pond" (thanks Jennifer) He is sick, the reason I put up with it, danced a dance to try to fix it, turned myself inside out worrying about it, embarrassed myself over and over begging for it to be different was/ is because I "caug...	glad	5	1850	Mar 14, 2008 by Tuggboat
	on death and heaven and God (Preview) I am posting this mainly to document it. The 2 younger ones and I were at dinner. On the placemat were questions to start discussions. What would you do if you were president, if you had 3 wishes, if you could have a wild animal, etc. The last one was if you could go back in time where would you go and why. My l...	serendipity	1	642	Mar 14, 2008 by lin0606
	More of my stuff (Preview) I feel like I should apologize at the beginning of my posts now because so much of it feels like I am "dumping" on you all. Yet, I need to be able to tell you all the truth of what is going on in my life. So with that in mind, The A did get 50 days in lock down. Some guy in jail called to tell me this with...	Codependent	4	449	Mar 14, 2008 by lin0606
	It takes two.... (Preview) Listening to the Osmonds Reunion concert. Marie and Donny are singing "It takes two". I miss my AHsober. We went skiing together - his idea. He said it will be fun. It was. Just like old times. Then we went south to golf and warm up after this wicked winter. My idea. I said it will be fun. It was. N...	nmike	4	441	Mar 14, 2008 by Maria123
	There is No Justifiable Judgement (Preview) (((Family))) I came on here to post about the topic of forgiveness and lo and behold I see Glad's post "to forgive the unrepentent" . Forgiveness was the topic of my ftf meeting last nite. We read pages 86 and 87 in "How Al-Anon Works for Families & Friends of Alcoholics". An...	david62	3	891	Mar 14, 2008 by Jean4444
	Thanks glad.... (Preview) I was pretty upset this morning when I came on here. I didn't want to post about what had happened, and I'm still not going to, because it's quite personal. So, I started reading. And I started with glad's post. That got me to thinking in a different direction and I posted my reply and with doing that, with...	JenniferN	1	468	Mar 14, 2008 by Jerry F
	Yes, the grass is greener. (Preview) I filed for divorce a month ago after months of agonizing and therapy, and years of making excuses. It was the hardest thing that I have ever done. I hate the fact that it has been difficult on my daughter. Yes, I have to carefully watch every penny. Yes, I have to lean on others. My XH is not happy with...	optimistundone	5	647	Mar 14, 2008 by carolinagirl
	Cunning - Powerful - Baffling (Preview) Aloha Family!! This is a must share for me so that I can relieve the awareness pressure from my spirit that the disease has brought. My wife and I attended a wake and viewing this morning for a young (40) man who died as a result of cancer. They were friends from my wife's work place who had moved to Nev 7 yea...	Jerry F	14	593	Mar 14, 2008 by Karilynn
	Without MOM! (Preview) I actually went to a meeting without my mom on Tuesday! I feel so great about it because I rarely go to meetings without her because of the fact that there are very few meetings in our town and she feels she needs to go to all of them so where does that leave me? Anyway, I went to a huge Alanon meeting 60 miles a...	Hoot Nanny	3	507	Mar 14, 2008 by glad
	Give us this day . . . our daily Laughter (Preview) I just had to share this with y'all. This Mom just had to be an Alanoner laughter in recovery, Maria HAVING MOM OVER FOR DINNERYou don't even have to be a mother to enjoy this one..Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, Brian's mother couldn't help but notice how beauti...	Maria123	9	740	Mar 14, 2008 by Karilynn
	I created my own double bind! (Preview) My wanting to "help" my "A" ( by nagging, begging, "explaining" (loudly) healthy thinking) has been totally selfish. My way to try to excape my own "double bind" I put myself in, which is: I don't want to be in an unhealthy relationship, but I do want to be w...	glad	3	599	Mar 14, 2008 by debilyn
	new to alanon just wondering if anyone has info for me (Preview) I am new to alanon although not new to alcoholism. My boyfriend is an alcoholic. Last weekend he was given a DUI and spent the night in jail. MUCH to his credit he has not drank since. He is really trying to stop drinking. He has been to two AA meetings and has an appointment with his therapist on Thursday. I...	qhgirl	14	666	Mar 14, 2008 by Karilynn
	Rough Start to a Beautiful Day...so far (Preview) Had a pretty rough start this morning...I asked him last night to make sure I was up this morning when he got home from work (7a.m.)...he did(n't)... he said ONE thing to me this morning to wake me up...and that doesn't work...I was pretty upset when I finally woke up 40 minutes later. I told him that I was...	JenniferN	7	685	Mar 14, 2008 by glad
	There is no rule I must return anger with anger (Preview) I had a testing moment this evening when I got home from work. My AH was out on the driveway washing his bike and his moped. I went inside for a bit, and then came across something that needed to be put in the garage, so I went to the garage to put that something away and noticed one of our good bath towels han...	Aloha	9	580	Mar 13, 2008 by maresie
	Twelve hours later...failed! (Preview) This morning I wrote about being angry and had every intention of having a successful day of even temperament. It is twelve hours later. My heart is breaking in half and I don't know if I am angry or just what I am feeling. Grandbaby and son here this afternoon. Marigolds planted. Lots of love and hugs an...	omajoy	10	516	Mar 13, 2008 by maresie
	quick update (Preview) Just wanted to say thanks to ya'll for the ESH and to let ya'll know that I did apologize to him when I got home. I thought about it more after my post and realized it wasn't really that important to be/stay upset over. So, I amitted I was wrong, apologized, and moved on! (oh and I'll be using the alarm on my ce...	JenniferN	0	309	Mar 13, 2008 by JenniferN
	This is where I am at.. (Preview) I am married to an alcoholic who is presently in an intensive rehab provided by the Department of Corrections - a special program for DUI felonly offenders. He is due to be released soon, coming home to family and job, under the watch of probation. He recently asked what he could do to make our marriage...	grizmom	15	739	Mar 13, 2008 by round3
	Anybody else ever do this? (Preview) Well I have discovered over the last few days I may want to do some things just because I want to. I just realized that in the (recent) past I have had some really weird thoughts in my head. Examples: I'll clean the house really good today, maybe light some candles (my boyfriend will like it when he c...	glad	3	610	Mar 13, 2008 by lin0606
	Newbie to Al-Anon, should I leave him? PLEASE HELP! (Preview) If he gets drunk while he is suppose to care for our 3-month-old daughter, should I leave him? He has never been physically abusive, but is emotionally abusive to me when he is drunk. He suffers from depression. His father is also an Alcoholic, and encourages him to drink. He admits he has a problem and...	NewMom07	10	735	Mar 13, 2008 by DANDTALWAYS
	If nothing changes, nothing changes... (Preview) A few months ago I had my granddaughter overnight, and had to take her to her mother's the next day (my alcoholic/addict 30 year old daughter). The daughter had been out of jail for some time, and was living with a new 'bf', someone she had met through the small church she's been attending since she's bee...	Tenderheartsks	9	754	Mar 13, 2008 by maresie
	shrivelled, ghoulish and toothless (Preview) I am a support worker and go into homes of those who are frail because of illness or age. Most of my clients are dying of preventable diseases and the ones who confront me the most of course are those dying of alcoholism. Some have wives who are nursing them and others are alone with their television sets...	silverbrumby	5	412	Mar 13, 2008 by maresie
	Speaker (Preview) Last night I was a speaker at an al-anon meeting. Its kind of my home group. I was really scared. I mean, I have done a ton of public speaking but this was really different. It was super hard but I did it and I shared some things that were very personal and very painful. It really brought some stuff back up for...	Jean4444	6	546	Mar 13, 2008 by maresie
	Tuesday's Gratitude (Preview) Having just finished an email to my sponsor because I felt it was too late to call, I thought I'd share some good things that happened yesterday/today. **side note first: you all are COMPLETELY AWESOME!!!****** I've been thinking the past couple of days how funny typing "my A" or "th...	JenniferN	5	520	Mar 13, 2008 by maresie
	oops, I think I messed up! (Preview) okay silly question / post about boundries, but just in case you guys never hear from me again you'll know why- (kidding I promise) BF ask me/ offered for me to use his truck to go to my work appointments because my car is really dangerous at the moment, something wrong with axel. In his truck at last minu...	glad	6	664	Mar 13, 2008 by carolinagirl
	More ok than I thought! (Preview) Been working on,ok what would make me feel better inside. So doing stuff here to make my home not such a muck up Today I drove from stupid Mapquests directions to pick up a ewe an ewe? wierd, anyway,got sorta lost.drove up, I mean UP this winding steep road wayyyyyyy up to the sky, truck ran out of gas.wond...	debilyn	7	558	Mar 13, 2008 by Tuggboat
	displaced anger (Preview) I have had some discussions recently with my counselor about anger. It seems that is the emotion I am most frequently experiencing lately...the one which undoes me in my quest for recovery and peace. He has gently pointed out to me that I have lots of reasons to be angry at the world the past months. My...	omajoy	8	2009	Mar 13, 2008 by Jean4444
	Courage to change... (Preview) I have been thinking a lot lately about what this really means in general, and specifically to me in my life. I think a lot of times courage is about getting past crippling fears and doing what is right. Then other times courage is doing the right thing even though it's not what I want to do or it's not com...	carolinagirl	8	482	Mar 13, 2008 by debilyn
	Need ESH (Preview) I've had 3 1/2 months with little to no contact from my A. During this time, I've discovered (and rediscovered) some things about myself. Thanks to this board and the program, I have opened up my eyes to lots of truths. I'm still digesting some of them and learning so many important things. So I go out...	round3	9	442	Mar 13, 2008 by debilyn
	Better! (Preview) Things are getting better slowly but surely. I am starting to let go of some of my character defects that are coming back to me lately. I mean past experiences are reminding me how truly "imperfect" I am. I am letting go of the need to control others, how I tend to be in the "all about m...	Hoot Nanny	2	458	Mar 13, 2008 by debilyn
	CAUTIOUSLY OPTIMISTIC (Preview) ((((Family)))) Having a discussion with the AH today, and he comes up with "Didn't you say your meeting also has AA on Wednesday Night?" So I say yes it does. Then he says I think I'll go with you tomorrow night. Hmmm. Mind you now, this man has attended only 2 AA meetings so far, so I'm not reall...	cookie1971	6	518	Mar 12, 2008 by cookie1971
	Forgotten how to do this... (Preview) ... and I don't want to be here. I am tired of being "sick" too! I'm not an alcoholic. I don't stay out all night. If anything, I am overly responsible! Tell me again... why am I "sick" too. I am sick... sick and tired. Fed up. Angry as hell! My first post here... and just needin...	Joy	4	765	Mar 12, 2008 by Jerry F
	Relief with release (Preview) I'm just feeling so much better now that I released my perceived "control" over my AH's drinking. That was, of course, threatening him that I'd leave if he drank again. Now... this doesn't mean that I'm not still figuring out my boundaries. I DO have to draw the line at some point. But I'm n...	Aloha	1	470	Mar 12, 2008 by glad
	My HP sure does work fast (Preview) I'm just blown away at how quickly my HP responds and sends me answers and relief. At times, my life is like those V8 commercials. Have you seen them? Some person will be filling their plate with bread and meat and then someone will come along and bonk them on the forehead for not including any vegetabl...	Aloha	4	590	Mar 12, 2008 by Jerry F
	My weekend... (Preview) I just wanted to share that my daughter (13) came into my room Sunday night at 4am - guess it was more like monday morning - and said she coundn't breathe. Then she got her inhaler and took a puff or two. She said her throat hurt so I took her in the bathroom and turned on the light and tried to get her to stick...	carolinagirl	6	475	Mar 12, 2008 by Heartbroken
	Self care self care self care (Preview) I think I always seem to be reporting some disaster or another but I am actually working super hard to get to better self care. I managed in the short period of time I was unemployed (I am grateful for that even though I really could have done with a longer break) and get some medication I really needed. I ha...	maresie	8	924	Mar 12, 2008 by maresie
	Parent's Job Description (Preview) PARENT Job Description *This is hysterical. If it had been presented this way, I don't believe any of us would have done it!!!! POSITION : Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma Dad , Dad dy, Dad a, Pa, Pop* JOB DESCRIPTION : Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work i n an often chaotic environment...**	Maria123	4	399	Mar 12, 2008 by JenniferN
	It's our MIP Baby's Birthday (Preview) (((((((((((((((((Ash aka Lauren aka Ashbaby)))))))))))))))))))))) Happy Birthday Girl. I hope your day was wonderful. Love ya, Maria	Maria123	8	648	Mar 12, 2008 by leo
	Getting it together! (Preview) All I can say really is that today is better than yesterday! I just keep plugging away and it seems like I am doing a little better day by day. I just need to let go of some things and clear the clutter from my mind and my own personal space. I guess it is almost time for some Spring cleaning. The snow is melti...	Hoot Nanny	3	423	Mar 12, 2008 by Maria123
	Rejoicing- and thinking of a Sponsor? (Preview) Okay besides the fact that I have got to get over my excitement about finding this relief to my pain of last few years and get some balance in my life, I mean I've go to get my work done sometime (more specifics on what I'm so happy about in my post response to "hp sure does work fast") but I'm tryi...	glad	4	707	Mar 12, 2008 by Jerry F
	give a dog a bone.... (Preview) Last week I was thinking about how my 2 older kids needed dressers in their rooms. My daughter has 2 small ones which cannot hold all the clothes she has strewn about her room (lots of hand-me-downs from a cousin) and my son has been supposed to use the shelves in his closet, but doesn't. I kick myself for g...	Loupiness	7	554	Mar 12, 2008 by Jen
	To Leave or not to Leave, that is NOT the question! (Preview) I just think that one of our members brought up an excellent topic recently and that is the issue of staying or leaving our A's. I wanted to bring it up in its own string because we seem to really get hung up on this staying/leaving "ZONE" and thinking that we can somehow control our A's by makin...	Jean4444	13	802	Mar 11, 2008 by nmike
	Random Thought for the Night (Preview) Living with the family disease of alcoholism is like going down a mountain... pretty easy to keep slipping further down. Recovering from this same disease is like going back up the mountain. It can be done... but it takes endurance and time and having the proper knowledge to know when to take a breat...	kismetstrand	2	422	Mar 11, 2008 by tea2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.