Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

DeadOrAlive · DeadOrAlive

I knew he had been smoking pot but thought (d e n i a l) it was just a joint now and then with friends. Now I found two sandwich baggies nearly both full of pot in his room. My sis says that could be worth as much as $500 each bag!!!! Is that true???? I checked his bank account and there are no withdrawals. N...

Nicole · Nicole

I don't like what I'm seeing right now about myself but I like that it's coming to head. I feel like I am going crazy in the sense that I say I'm not going to do it and all of a sudden I do it. Spying on my husbands every move. I snoop around and look for clues and I'm just waiting or for him to say I'm in love with som...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I have been visualizing placing all the stuff coming up on a conveyor belt that makes its way to HP. It gets over to him for his turn on the line. Really helping me, thought I would share this industrial image with you all. Of course when I think of conveyor belts, I think of Lucille Ball and the candy episod...

maresie · maresie

When I left the A one of my most humbling experiences was to take a gift from an ex boyfriend of mine. I had nothing, no resources and I had asked him for help. Getting help from him invovled tremendous triggers for me. He kept telling me that the felt sorry for me. I felt really put down a lot of the time. N...

angel123 · angel123

Nature at its best The morning sun is peeking thru the trees Time for a new beginning of a new day. The unknown, what lies ahead But to set my frame of mind To know all this will come to pass And enjoy the moments and learn, laugh, smile, and be content being me I made a garden of wildflowers at home and potted a...

Suzannah · Suzannah

This week will be a really heavy week, and although I have found myself pledging it to my HP I still know that humanly it is going to take a lot of ternacity to get through it. I am very low in spirit and I know that my recent encounter on my second fourth step is proving to be very hard going and I have, for this...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Friends, We always spend the 4th of July the same way - a parade in the morning and friends' house at night. They live on a golf course and we "sneak" out there to watch fireworks overhead. Nice mellow company and an awesome view. I was happy to discover that the holiday landed on my weekend wit...

maresie · maresie

I know i'm always whining and complaining so I'll say this. I went on a date this weekend, didn't marry the man. I also didn't obsess, plan, obsess, plan and obsess about what the relationship will become. He didn't follow me home. I didn't sleep with him,. I didn't call him 500 times, he didn't call me 50...

MomGayle42 · MomGayle42

My son started skipping school, disrespecting house rules, bringing strangers into my home and I eventually said enough. He went to stay with his step dad where he had free rein. He went to a party and was assualted. Flown to Harbeview Hospital and had open brain surgery. We did not know if he would liv...

mossrn · mossrn

I am new to this, I realize that I need recovery from a life time of others drinking and drugs. I am for the first time in my 44 years angry at my father and sister who have been verbally and mentally abusive. How do I deal with the anger. I just hit a wall this past year watching my sister sprial out of control a...

irish54 · irish54

Hi everyone! I have been gone from this site for quite a while, as my computer had crashed. Nice to be back. It's enough to say that alcohol and mental illness has affected me all my life ... father was an alcoholic, husband was an A and drug dealer; children involved with alcohol/drugs, son bipolar...

lonewolfmama · lonewolfmama

Hi to everyone out there going through trouble because of the A's we love and pray for. I am so grateful to this site as every time my ABF starts drinking again I can come here and see that there are others out there in my situationwho wish they weren't and are trying so hard to detach. Sometimes I wonder h...

glad · glad

Thanks again for the support of my little family here. After a distant, grumpy sober weekend... This morning a bright, well spoken BF left for his work trip again. He was positive, spoke reasonably about practical issues, sending me money to reimburse our expenses for weekend, and left in a good mo...

Nicole · Nicole

I have been in the program for a little over a year and I'm still having trouble letting go. I don't really understand how you can do it. I have tried reading the literature and for a very long time, I thought I had but every single time I'm around my mother in-law, I completely lose it and I don't know why. ...

joyoma · joyoma

Preface: I am not asking for responses to this post. I just need to get it out of my soul and the only way I can do that is to write. So thanks for reading it...or not. Sorry in advance for giving into depression today. Why is it that weekends and holidays are so hard? I know why for me. I have no one to shar...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingJuly 13, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I am in a bit of a bind. Here is my situation. I am going to visit my sweetheart in a few weeks. After he picks me up I can choose to do two things- go with him to a social event related to his job or I can go see my QiGong master and have a session with her/a class. I am struggling with trying to figure out which one t...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

(((((Family))))) Things have been very rough at home. I have been battling with bitterness towards my AH. I had been getting very angry after working 14 hour days to come home and find my retired AH passed out on the couch and the house in shambles. So tired of having to deal with it all. I had been trying...

laurab · laurab

[spoiler] If the last few days weren't so pathetic and totally crazy, it would be funny. A Son was rescued again by his separated from W. W has a BF with money who she really doesn't want but he pays for lots. W & BF signed a lease on a house so W can breed dogs. She has 2 female...

glad · glad

Weekend, spent time and effort planning very nice bed and breakfast get away. BF was sober but SILENT the whole freaking time. He said most important thing to him was me having a good weekend then acted like a zombie the whole time. NOT one time did he try to engage me in conversation. Sober but distant! P...

angel123 · angel123

Touched by a angel The nest the root of new beginnings As a baby chick is in its egg, it is a process for the egg to crack open one day. And be free from the comfort zone, to a new surrounding. It depends on food to nurture it. As well as keeping it safe. The little chick is growing and becoming aware of its surro...

charlescharles · charlescharles

scary times...just got into the rooms of alanon...and back into the rooms of na and aa god grant me hope and wisdom...salvation..serenity and courage my relationship to myself is a rough one right now...need to take more care and responsibility for myself can not continue to blame the other..my par...

Lexie · Lexie

((((((((friends))))))))) My son's court case could not have gone any better today. He had a wonderful judge that is in recovery himself, so has a good understanding of what people go through that are trying to get their lives back on track. To me, that was God working. Anyway, my son will be done wit...

angel66 · angel66

I listen to everyone speak of their HP and how they leave things in their HP's hands etc but I have no understanding of the idea of a HP. I believe in God although (pity party) I feel like I"ve been dealt a really bad hand of cards during my life starting with a cancer diagnosis when I was 29 and leaving m...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Well... I am doing OK. I just wanted to check in. I hope everyone is having a wonderful 4th of July weekend. Trying to live one day at a time with plans for the future. Hopefully I don't end up projecting and ruining today. I just am so impatient and I want to get things done. Someone suggested writing...

Alaina · Alaina

A few months ago I met someone and since I have totally fallen head over heels for him. I met him while on vacation through my brother. We instantly clicked and it felt like we had known each other for years. I live 2,000 miles away from him but we have managed to keep a long distance relationship. I have eve...

maire rua · maire rua

Yes, today the fuel pump died just as we were returning from holidays, am having a run of having everything break together, have had to buy new washing machine and could have done without this expense, still I am trying hard to do a gratitude list, I have a spare car, so just need to transfer insurance on m...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Ok, I have taken some time out and decided that after writing about my marriage and the love of my life I have to face it and walk that fourth step through it to get to the other side and into the light of holistic healing. It is really scary to face your worst nightmare, walk with it for twenty so years and the...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Just came back from the annual 4th of July joint AA/Al-Anon potluck get together at one of the members home and found a picture of perfection in the mail box. It reminds me of when we were at our very best and totally dependent. That scary perfection time. Yet how beautiful we all were and Ruby Blue get...

Becky1 · Becky1

Sunday, a week ago, AH and I took granddaughter, 7 months old, for a ride into the country, to a dairy farm/ice cream place. He was sweet and kind, helped with the baby, showed her the animals and gave her a taste of his ice cream. Gave her her bottle. She loves her Grandpa. We took lots of pictures that...

angel66 · angel66

Just in case anyone who I've talked to wants to know ~Jackie

jackie S · jackie S

Does anyone know how to change your username? I want to change it to the username I use in the chat room and dont know how. Of course I went to re register but since my email address is already in the system, it wouldnt let me do anything. Thx in advance

jackie S · jackie S

Just a quick question..................... Who deals with or handles it when you have problems on the site or your homepage? I've sent several emails out to mip for help without any response. I'm not getting my daily forum digests and dont know if I need to sign up a different way; I already did the mip e...

mslouise · mslouise

Hello- I am pretty new to Al-Anon and have been going for about 2 months now. My bf was going to have his 90 pin tomorrow, but he relapsed last night. He recently finished a program (his work held his job for him while he was completeing) and has been going to AA 2x week. Well, I came home last night and tol...

angel123 · angel123

Good Morning, I had so much on my goal list for camp, We are having a Pig Roast there is Holiday. As I was preparing food for our journey, making pig in a blanket with mini Hot dogs and crescent rolls, wrapped around them, also was making Mac and cheese with ham in it. Something come over me StopBreath.list...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

This post is about my stinking thinking. I was recently in a situation where I was going on nothing- no good information about anything. I was operating in the dark. And when I am operating in the dark: where do I go? Into the insanity of my disease: stinking thinking!!! I begin to 1.) doubt, 2.) expect th...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family)))))), To my American family: HAPPY 4TH OF JULY! To my International family: HAPPY WEEKEND! If you get the daily word from Hazelden, Melody Beattie's entry is on it today. It talks about celebrating independence, not only our nation's but independence from codependency and addi...

maresie · maresie

My last 6/7 4th of July holidays have all been spent trying to control an A who was out of control. Last year on 4th July I spent all my money trying to get the A off the street. Like always in my codependency I felt the effort would be appreciated (it never was but hope was something I held onto rigidly for a l...

lmw · lmw

It's officially after midnight here on the East Coast of the US, so Happy Fourth of July to all my MIP friends. My oldest daughter - my own little firecracker - turns 9 today which is so hard to believe! I just finished frosting the mandatory American flag cake we'll be sharing with my family later toda...

maresie · maresie

When I moved into the house I am in now I was really in a bind. I was desperate to get the dogs out from the A's care. So I didn't even consider the implications of what I was doing. To say I was exhausted was an understatement. When I moved in here there was a man here (he's still here) and he was plesant. Back...

kingston2902 · kingston2902

Well I'm back again - been reading up on the past posts, they have been so helpful -thank you. My conclusion is that I have a dry drunk for a husband. I sat down with him a few days ago and told him how I was feeling and what I needed to ensure that i felt better. In a nutshell he needs to find a job that will pay f...

JenniferN · JenniferN

Friday was his first sober birthday. It was wonderful to watch him receive his one year medallion and to hear the speaker's story and to feel the love of all the sober alcoholic's in one room. And for me it was bittersweet. My dad is an active alcoholic. While we were standing shoulder to shoulder and han...

stormie · stormie

As some of you might recall, my husband slipped up a few weeks back and had at least one drink. If a recovering alcoholic slips up and has even one drink, does that mean he or she has to start all over again counting the days, months of sobriety? Hubby keeps saying it will have his first sober birthday in A...

new member - Living with a recovering A · JohnInFL

We are mid fifties and have been down 25 years of hard road due to my wife's drinking. I am ACOA and codependent of course and drink next to nothing. Maybe 6 drinks/year. She has progressed from 6 beers/day to 18 beers/day, every day, over 30 years. Yes, I said 18. Her drinking has killed any relatio...

QOD · QOD

I have been divorced from my exAH since March 08. What an accomplishment for me. I have come so far in the last few years. I amazed at myself for all that I have done. Yet I am even more amazed by where I am still stuck!! By this I mean, I am still so very angry!! The anger helps me get the "must do's&q...

kingston2902 · kingston2902

I've been reading/lurking here for a while now. I'm in a situation now where I really need some feedback. My AH has been sober now for about 3 1/2 years. He doesn't go to AA anymore - he did regularly for the first year but now nothing. He also doesn't work. He has used all his savings/pension. He had this dr...

angel123 · angel123

Thank God morning, Remember this old saying some would say Good God morning or Thank God morning I am Thankful the spiritual Awaking I have bin experiencing. I have bin going to camp as you all know. This is where I am most able to learn how to calm me down for this time in my life. I have bin enjoying every mo...

glad · glad

I have realized this week that I really need to let go of "resentment" in order to feel happy. I need to find some answers- Higher Power can provide I know. I am not purposely holding on to things but since my way is to "discuss" feelings about things that happen and my A's is to sim...

jackie S · jackie S

I was just thinking after reading some messages and being in the meeting...........that my AH is active, with no desire to stop drinking. I neither have a AH in treatment , a sober AH, or a recovering AH . My AH doesnt want to stop drinking. He "doesnt have a problem". Its "not an issue...

be4yourii · be4yourii

Well, sooner came sooner than I thought it would. . . and it really was the last straw. I just dont understand this disease. THE GOOD: Im not really sure how things are going to work out, but I can not stay in this relationship. For the longest time I was holding onto hope, but now there is none left to hold on...

carosie · carosie

I'm feeling pretty sad today. Tomorrow I'm flying back east..my brother is dying. He's near the end of his life. He is only 55 yrs old. He is also one of my qualifiers. He has stage 4 liver cancer that has spread. My sisters and I will all gather and say our good byes. Please keep my family in your praye...

ddub · ddub

dear family, what a month of growth and gratitude for the al anon tools I have learned so far. Listen, think, my side of the street, say what I mean, let go & let God, embrace feelings, and prayers for all of you while I have been gone this month of June. I had expected to spend the 2nd week of June at a c...

maresie · maresie

I'm having to revise my expectations. When I stopped people pleasing, people were not singing from the roof tops. In fact a lot of them are downright unpleased that I have stopped doing for them what they need to do for themselves. They aren't exactly happy I stopped paying for everything or stopped t...

debilyn · debilyn

I am a Recovering addict and had the first 12 years of our marriage clean but had issues that went unattended and I eventually relapsed 10 years back and have had up and down off and on again slips and relapses. Every time there is an emotional crisis I hit the pipe and the bottle. 15 months ago I entered a re...

queenie105 · queenie105

It happened just as I thought it would! I knew he drank Monday night, and of course, yesterday, when I got home from working all day, found a note from him telling me he was going to a meeting and be home at 6:30. Well, it must have been some meeting! He was drunk as a skunk. I expected it (why would I expec...

meagain · meagain

My son and DIL refuse all my calls etc. and will now not let me see the grandkids. This has been going over 2 months. OK PLEASE I am pleading----I have a God box and put my letting go in there. It helped at first---but now I am in terrible aniexty, like I feel like I am having a heart attack. I guess I am taking G...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

The day before yesterday: While I was at work, AH took my two girls and one of thier friends to a movie and dinner. My daughter told me she saw three empty beer bottles at his feet when the movie was over. They went to a resteraunt where he ordered a white russian. When AH left the resteraunt, the owner calle...

maresie · maresie

As you all know I'm more than one year out from leaving the A. The issue for me is that there is still tremendous codpendency in me. I tend to try harder when people are obnoxious. I people please in my sleep. I catch myself doing it and the blame game and then get mad and lash out. I don't think I know what a &qu...

ESH · ESH

I watch this show a lot and I get a lot out of it. I like some of their sayings regarding an intervention. One of the things that they tell the family (during pre-intervention) to keep in mind as a support for the addict to accept help is: - There's nothing we won't do to help you get better - Ther...

laurab · laurab

This morning my XDIL called to say she was dumping my A son out in the street for all kinds of reasons. He has been with her for a week.I got right off the phone. Then I got 2 emails from my son, blaming her and saying he had to get away from her so he was going to be on the street 100 miles from here. I had a long stan...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	found pot in teen's room have a question (Preview) I knew he had been smoking pot but thought (d e n i a l) it was just a joint now and then with friends. Now I found two sandwich baggies nearly both full of pot in his room. My sis says that could be worth as much as $500 each bag!!!! Is that true???? I checked his bank account and there are no withdrawals. N...	DeadOrAlive	10	786	Jul 8, 2008 by Mobirdie
	I think I may be coming out of denial about myself (Preview) I don't like what I'm seeing right now about myself but I like that it's coming to head. I feel like I am going crazy in the sense that I say I'm not going to do it and all of a sudden I do it. Spying on my husbands every move. I snoop around and look for clues and I'm just waiting or for him to say I'm in love with som...	Nicole	8	650	Jul 8, 2008 by maresie
	The Factory (conveyor belt) (Preview) I have been visualizing placing all the stuff coming up on a conveyor belt that makes its way to HP. It gets over to him for his turn on the line. Really helping me, thought I would share this industrial image with you all. Of course when I think of conveyor belts, I think of Lucille Ball and the candy episod...	Jean4444	5	700	Jul 8, 2008 by round3
	looking at triggers rather than being them (Preview) When I left the A one of my most humbling experiences was to take a gift from an ex boyfriend of mine. I had nothing, no resources and I had asked him for help. Getting help from him invovled tremendous triggers for me. He kept telling me that the felt sorry for me. I felt really put down a lot of the time. N...	maresie	1	383	Jul 8, 2008 by maire rua
	"Nature at it's Best" (Preview) Nature at its best The morning sun is peeking thru the trees Time for a new beginning of a new day. The unknown, what lies ahead But to set my frame of mind To know all this will come to pass And enjoy the moments and learn, laugh, smile, and be content being me I made a garden of wildflowers at home and potted a...	angel123	4	452	Jul 8, 2008 by Suzannah
	No physical support... (Preview) This week will be a really heavy week, and although I have found myself pledging it to my HP I still know that humanly it is going to take a lot of ternacity to get through it. I am very low in spirit and I know that my recent encounter on my second fourth step is proving to be very hard going and I have, for this...	Suzannah	10	549	Jul 8, 2008 by Suzannah
	I think I learned something! (Preview) Friends, We always spend the 4th of July the same way - a parade in the morning and friends' house at night. They live on a golf course and we "sneak" out there to watch fireworks overhead. Nice mellow company and an awesome view. I was happy to discover that the holiday landed on my weekend wit...	Loupiness	6	658	Jul 8, 2008 by ddub
	on a positive note (Preview) I know i'm always whining and complaining so I'll say this. I went on a date this weekend, didn't marry the man. I also didn't obsess, plan, obsess, plan and obsess about what the relationship will become. He didn't follow me home. I didn't sleep with him,. I didn't call him 500 times, he didn't call me 50...	maresie	7	515	Jul 7, 2008 by cookie1971
	Mothers worst nightmare (Preview) My son started skipping school, disrespecting house rules, bringing strangers into my home and I eventually said enough. He went to stay with his step dad where he had free rein. He went to a party and was assualted. Flown to Harbeview Hospital and had open brain surgery. We did not know if he would liv...	MomGayle42	18	919	Jul 7, 2008 by MomGayle42
	new to al-anon (Preview) I am new to this, I realize that I need recovery from a life time of others drinking and drugs. I am for the first time in my 44 years angry at my father and sister who have been verbally and mentally abusive. How do I deal with the anger. I just hit a wall this past year watching my sister sprial out of control a...	mossrn	7	651	Jul 7, 2008 by cookie1971
	Some things don't change (Preview) Hi everyone! I have been gone from this site for quite a while, as my computer had crashed. Nice to be back. It's enough to say that alcohol and mental illness has affected me all my life ... father was an alcoholic, husband was an A and drug dealer; children involved with alcohol/drugs, son bipolar...	irish54	9	681	Jul 7, 2008 by cookie1971
	Six Months Pregnant/ABF Drinking Again (Preview) Hi to everyone out there going through trouble because of the A's we love and pray for. I am so grateful to this site as every time my ABF starts drinking again I can come here and see that there are others out there in my situationwho wish they weren't and are trying so hard to detach. Sometimes I wonder h...	lonewolfmama	7	768	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Thankful for brief moment this am and for you guys! (Preview) Thanks again for the support of my little family here. After a distant, grumpy sober weekend... This morning a bright, well spoken BF left for his work trip again. He was positive, spoke reasonably about practical issues, sending me money to reimburse our expenses for weekend, and left in a good mo...	glad	2	503	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Don't know how to let go (Preview) I have been in the program for a little over a year and I'm still having trouble letting go. I don't really understand how you can do it. I have tried reading the literature and for a very long time, I thought I had but every single time I'm around my mother in-law, I completely lose it and I don't know why. ...	Nicole	12	849	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	major pity party today (Preview) Preface: I am not asking for responses to this post. I just need to get it out of my soul and the only way I can do that is to write. So thanks for reading it...or not. Sorry in advance for giving into depression today. Why is it that weekends and holidays are so hard? I know why for me. I have no one to shar...	joyoma	6	629	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	July Business Meeting-----07/13/08 (Preview) Hello ((((Family)))) This Sunday evening is the monthly business meeting (9pm CST), I hope you can make it! Please try to be there!!! Here is the agenda for the meeting! MIP Al-Anon Business MeetingJuly 13, 2008Open with Serenity PrayerSecretary's Report ...	Mandy123	0	363	Jul 7, 2008 by Mandy123
	Sometimes its HARD to know what I want, exactly...do you know what I mean? (Preview) I am in a bit of a bind. Here is my situation. I am going to visit my sweetheart in a few weeks. After he picks me up I can choose to do two things- go with him to a social event related to his job or I can go see my QiGong master and have a session with her/a class. I am struggling with trying to figure out which one t...	Jean4444	14	773	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	REMEMBERING HE IS SICK (Preview) (((((Family))))) Things have been very rough at home. I have been battling with bitterness towards my AH. I had been getting very angry after working 14 hour days to come home and find my retired AH passed out on the couch and the house in shambles. So tired of having to deal with it all. I had been trying...	cookie1971	11	714	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Such Craziness- You couldn't make this one up (Preview) [spoiler] If the last few days weren't so pathetic and totally crazy, it would be funny. A Son was rescued again by his separated from W. W has a BF with money who she really doesn't want but he pays for lots. W & BF signed a lease on a house so W can breed dogs. She has 2 female...	laurab	6	735	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Just freaking ranting and raving! (Preview) Weekend, spent time and effort planning very nice bed and breakfast get away. BF was sober but SILENT the whole freaking time. He said most important thing to him was me having a good weekend then acted like a zombie the whole time. NOT one time did he try to engage me in conversation. Sober but distant! P...	glad	6	672	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	Touched by, a Angel (Preview) Touched by a angel The nest the root of new beginnings As a baby chick is in its egg, it is a process for the egg to crack open one day. And be free from the comfort zone, to a new surrounding. It depends on food to nurture it. As well as keeping it safe. The little chick is growing and becoming aware of its surro...	angel123	1	464	Jul 7, 2008 by angel66
	help help help me please (Preview) scary times...just got into the rooms of alanon...and back into the rooms of na and aa god grant me hope and wisdom...salvation..serenity and courage my relationship to myself is a rough one right now...need to take more care and responsibility for myself can not continue to blame the other..my par...	charlescharles	9	761	Jul 7, 2008 by maresie
	update on son (Preview) ((((((((friends))))))))) My son's court case could not have gone any better today. He had a wonderful judge that is in recovery himself, so has a good understanding of what people go through that are trying to get their lives back on track. To me, that was God working. Anyway, my son will be done wit...	Lexie	11	611	Jul 7, 2008 by mel123
	Finding my Higher Power (Preview) I listen to everyone speak of their HP and how they leave things in their HP's hands etc but I have no understanding of the idea of a HP. I believe in God although (pity party) I feel like I"ve been dealt a really bad hand of cards during my life starting with a cancer diagnosis when I was 29 and leaving m...	angel66	11	3151	Jul 6, 2008 by angel66
	Hi everyone! (Preview) Well... I am doing OK. I just wanted to check in. I hope everyone is having a wonderful 4th of July weekend. Trying to live one day at a time with plans for the future. Hopefully I don't end up projecting and ruining today. I just am so impatient and I want to get things done. Someone suggested writing...	Hoot Nanny	4	455	Jul 6, 2008 by Karilynn
	Can this work? (Preview) A few months ago I met someone and since I have totally fallen head over heels for him. I met him while on vacation through my brother. We instantly clicked and it felt like we had known each other for years. I live 2,000 miles away from him but we have managed to keep a long distance relationship. I have eve...	Alaina	13	507	Jul 5, 2008 by Jean4444
	irritating day (Preview) Yes, today the fuel pump died just as we were returning from holidays, am having a run of having everything break together, have had to buy new washing machine and could have done without this expense, still I am trying hard to do a gratitude list, I have a spare car, so just need to transfer insurance on m...	maire rua	3	461	Jul 5, 2008 by Jean4444
	Courage to face it all...this is the miracle for today... (Preview) Ok, I have taken some time out and decided that after writing about my marriage and the love of my life I have to face it and walk that fourth step through it to get to the other side and into the light of holistic healing. It is really scary to face your worst nightmare, walk with it for twenty so years and the...	Suzannah	7	638	Jul 5, 2008 by debilyn
	What it was like back then... (Preview) Just came back from the annual 4th of July joint AA/Al-Anon potluck get together at one of the members home and found a picture of perfection in the mail box. It reminds me of when we were at our very best and totally dependent. That scary perfection time. Yet how beautiful we all were and Ruby Blue get...	Jerry F	12	806	Jul 5, 2008 by cookie1971
	I'm Moving On (Preview) Sunday, a week ago, AH and I took granddaughter, 7 months old, for a ride into the country, to a dairy farm/ice cream place. He was sweet and kind, helped with the baby, showed her the animals and gave her a taste of his ice cream. Gave her her bottle. She loves her Grandpa. We took lots of pictures that...	Becky1	12	686	Jul 5, 2008 by Sincerely
	New name -jackie S now angel66 (Preview) Just in case anyone who I've talked to wants to know ~Jackie	angel66	0	395	Jul 5, 2008 by angel66
	tech question - change username (Preview) Does anyone know how to change your username? I want to change it to the username I use in the chat room and dont know how. Of course I went to re register but since my email address is already in the system, it wouldnt let me do anything. Thx in advance	jackie S	1	398	Jul 5, 2008 by angel66
	Issues with Site (Preview) Just a quick question..................... Who deals with or handles it when you have problems on the site or your homepage? I've sent several emails out to mip for help without any response. I'm not getting my daily forum digests and dont know if I need to sign up a different way; I already did the mip e...	jackie S	2	337	Jul 4, 2008 by jackie S
	He relapsed..new to Al-Anon..not sure what to say or do. (Preview) Hello- I am pretty new to Al-Anon and have been going for about 2 months now. My bf was going to have his 90 pin tomorrow, but he relapsed last night. He recently finished a program (his work held his job for him while he was completeing) and has been going to AA 2x week. Well, I came home last night and tol...	mslouise	13	793	Jul 4, 2008 by AJ
	MY ESH (Preview) Good Morning, I had so much on my goal list for camp, We are having a Pig Roast there is Holiday. As I was preparing food for our journey, making pig in a blanket with mini Hot dogs and crescent rolls, wrapped around them, also was making Mac and cheese with ham in it. Something come over me StopBreath.list...	angel123	5	541	Jul 4, 2008 by Jean4444
	It's always there...its not going to go away! (Preview) This post is about my stinking thinking. I was recently in a situation where I was going on nothing- no good information about anything. I was operating in the dark. And when I am operating in the dark: where do I go? Into the insanity of my disease: stinking thinking!!! I begin to 1.) doubt, 2.) expect th...	Jean4444	6	870	Jul 4, 2008 by Jean4444
	Happy 4th of July! (Preview) ((((((((Family)))))), To my American family: HAPPY 4TH OF JULY! To my International family: HAPPY WEEKEND! If you get the daily word from Hazelden, Melody Beattie's entry is on it today. It talks about celebrating independence, not only our nation's but independence from codependency and addi...	Karilynn	2	458	Jul 4, 2008 by nmike
	Happy holidays (Preview) My last 6/7 4th of July holidays have all been spent trying to control an A who was out of control. Last year on 4th July I spent all my money trying to get the A off the street. Like always in my codependency I felt the effort would be appreciated (it never was but hope was something I held onto rigidly for a l...	maresie	6	434	Jul 4, 2008 by Karilynn
	HAPPY 4TH OF JULY (Preview) It's officially after midnight here on the East Coast of the US, so Happy Fourth of July to all my MIP friends. My oldest daughter - my own little firecracker - turns 9 today which is so hard to believe! I just finished frosting the mandatory American flag cake we'll be sharing with my family later toda...	lmw	2	394	Jul 4, 2008 by Karilynn
	low expectations and no boundaries (the two don't go together) (Preview) When I moved into the house I am in now I was really in a bind. I was desperate to get the dogs out from the A's care. So I didn't even consider the implications of what I was doing. To say I was exhausted was an understatement. When I moved in here there was a man here (he's still here) and he was plesant. Back...	maresie	1	564	Jul 4, 2008 by Christy
	How to open up a conversation (Preview) Well I'm back again - been reading up on the past posts, they have been so helpful -thank you. My conclusion is that I have a dry drunk for a husband. I sat down with him a few days ago and told him how I was feeling and what I needed to ensure that i felt better. In a nutshell he needs to find a job that will pay f...	kingston2902	4	665	Jul 4, 2008 by debilyn
	My A's First "Birthday" (Preview) Friday was his first sober birthday. It was wonderful to watch him receive his one year medallion and to hear the speaker's story and to feel the love of all the sober alcoholic's in one room. And for me it was bittersweet. My dad is an active alcoholic. While we were standing shoulder to shoulder and han...	JenniferN	5	691	Jul 3, 2008 by maresie
	Question Regarding Sober Birthdays (Preview) As some of you might recall, my husband slipped up a few weeks back and had at least one drink. If a recovering alcoholic slips up and has even one drink, does that mean he or she has to start all over again counting the days, months of sobriety? Hubby keeps saying it will have his first sober birthday in A...	stormie	7	666	Jul 3, 2008 by canadianguy
	new member - Living with a recovering A (Preview) We are mid fifties and have been down 25 years of hard road due to my wife's drinking. I am ACOA and codependent of course and drink next to nothing. Maybe 6 drinks/year. She has progressed from 6 beers/day to 18 beers/day, every day, over 30 years. Yes, I said 18. Her drinking has killed any relatio...	JohnInFL	13	912	Jul 3, 2008 by maresie
	Oh the anger!! Why?? (Preview) I have been divorced from my exAH since March 08. What an accomplishment for me. I have come so far in the last few years. I amazed at myself for all that I have done. Yet I am even more amazed by where I am still stuck!! By this I mean, I am still so very angry!! The anger helps me get the "must do's&q...	QOD	15	748	Jul 3, 2008 by Karilynn
	Better for me so why the confusion? (Preview) I've been reading/lurking here for a while now. I'm in a situation now where I really need some feedback. My AH has been sober now for about 3 1/2 years. He doesn't go to AA anymore - he did regularly for the first year but now nothing. He also doesn't work. He has used all his savings/pension. He had this dr...	kingston2902	4	582	Jul 3, 2008 by kingston2902
	Spiritual Awakiening (Preview) Thank God morning, Remember this old saying some would say Good God morning or Thank God morning I am Thankful the spiritual Awaking I have bin experiencing. I have bin going to camp as you all know. This is where I am most able to learn how to calm me down for this time in my life. I have bin enjoying every mo...	angel123	2	382	Jul 2, 2008 by nmike
	Resolving "things" vs behavior change with no explaination? (Preview) I have realized this week that I really need to let go of "resentment" in order to feel happy. I need to find some answers- Higher Power can provide I know. I am not purposely holding on to things but since my way is to "discuss" feelings about things that happen and my A's is to sim...	glad	5	888	Jul 2, 2008 by Jerry F
	My AH who is NOT an "AH" (Preview) I was just thinking after reading some messages and being in the meeting...........that my AH is active, with no desire to stop drinking. I neither have a AH in treatment , a sober AH, or a recovering AH . My AH doesnt want to stop drinking. He "doesnt have a problem". Its "not an issue...	jackie S	8	661	Jul 2, 2008 by jackie S
	The good, the bad and the ugly (Preview) Well, sooner came sooner than I thought it would. . . and it really was the last straw. I just dont understand this disease. THE GOOD: Im not really sure how things are going to work out, but I can not stay in this relationship. For the longest time I was holding onto hope, but now there is none left to hold on...	be4yourii	16	682	Jul 2, 2008 by lam0204
	prayer request (Preview) I'm feeling pretty sad today. Tomorrow I'm flying back east..my brother is dying. He's near the end of his life. He is only 55 yrs old. He is also one of my qualifiers. He has stage 4 liver cancer that has spread. My sisters and I will all gather and say our good byes. Please keep my family in your praye...	carosie	5	394	Jul 2, 2008 by Leetle
	Unexpected cured me of expectations (Preview) dear family, what a month of growth and gratitude for the al anon tools I have learned so far. Listen, think, my side of the street, say what I mean, let go & let God, embrace feelings, and prayers for all of you while I have been gone this month of June. I had expected to spend the 2nd week of June at a c...	ddub	6	671	Jul 2, 2008 by nmike
	Expectations (Preview) I'm having to revise my expectations. When I stopped people pleasing, people were not singing from the roof tops. In fact a lot of them are downright unpleased that I have stopped doing for them what they need to do for themselves. They aren't exactly happy I stopped paying for everything or stopped t...	maresie	5	464	Jul 2, 2008 by kitty
	posting for Du Jour (Preview) I am a Recovering addict and had the first 12 years of our marriage clean but had issues that went unattended and I eventually relapsed 10 years back and have had up and down off and on again slips and relapses. Every time there is an emotional crisis I hit the pipe and the bottle. 15 months ago I entered a re...	debilyn	4	445	Jul 2, 2008 by Jen
	I'm leaving it up to HP, but still can't get past the bitterness (Preview) It happened just as I thought it would! I knew he drank Monday night, and of course, yesterday, when I got home from working all day, found a note from him telling me he was going to a meeting and be home at 6:30. Well, it must have been some meeting! He was drunk as a skunk. I expected it (why would I expec...	queenie105	4	597	Jul 2, 2008 by QOD
	How to "Let Go and Let God" (Preview) My son and DIL refuse all my calls etc. and will now not let me see the grandkids. This has been going over 2 months. OK PLEASE I am pleading----I have a God box and put my letting go in there. It helped at first---but now I am in terrible aniexty, like I feel like I am having a heart attack. I guess I am taking G...	meagain	6	735	Jul 2, 2008 by maresie
	a troubling incident (Preview) The day before yesterday: While I was at work, AH took my two girls and one of thier friends to a movie and dinner. My daughter told me she saw three empty beer bottles at his feet when the movie was over. They went to a resteraunt where he ordered a white russian. When AH left the resteraunt, the owner calle...	RainyJamie	10	649	Jul 2, 2008 by maresie
	slip and sliding (Preview) As you all know I'm more than one year out from leaving the A. The issue for me is that there is still tremendous codpendency in me. I tend to try harder when people are obnoxious. I people please in my sleep. I catch myself doing it and the blame game and then get mad and lash out. I don't think I know what a &qu...	maresie	3	354	Jul 2, 2008 by maresie
	A&E's show, "Intervention" (Preview) I watch this show a lot and I get a lot out of it. I like some of their sayings regarding an intervention. One of the things that they tell the family (during pre-intervention) to keep in mind as a support for the addict to accept help is: - There's nothing we won't do to help you get better - Ther...	ESH	4	3979	Jul 2, 2008 by stariana
	The 3 Cs and the new me! (Preview) This morning my XDIL called to say she was dumping my A son out in the street for all kinds of reasons. He has been with her for a week.I got right off the phone. Then I got 2 emails from my son, blaming her and saying he had to get away from her so he was going to be on the street 100 miles from here. I had a long stan...	laurab	6	749	Jul 2, 2008 by joyoma
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.