Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

RLC · RLC

Hello All, I have always taken a little pride (not always a good thing) in the fact that I have "NEVER" been late to one of our Al-Anon meetings, and I go twice a week for the past two years. Sometimes members will drag in 5 minutes or so late, not me I'm always there 15 or 20 minutes early to...

AJ · AJ

It's been 8 weeks since my AH and I separated. I've been attending f2f Al-Anon meetings since - wonderful stuff there, and posting here - what a blessing! Today's brief visit with my AH went okay. He wasn't drunk during our visit. I could still smell the alcohol on his breath from last night's binge. My...

JenniferN · JenniferN

I've been wondering lately where that fine line between detachment with love and taking care of someone you love lies. I know not to take care of things he can obviously do on his own: like getting up in the morning, cooking, making appointments things like that. But I guess I'm having difficulty with t...

Totally Heartbroken · Totally Heartbroken

My AH was doing pretty good for the last several months.I noticed he was sneaking drinks again here and there but it wasn't bad.Then I went away to camp for a week and came home to a nightmare. He is in full blown again.I talked to a good friend of his who is suggesting an intervention. Here is where it gets c...

Christy · Christy

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOUPINESS!!! I know we're not to give advice, let alone an order but...... You have a wonderful day!! That's an order!!!! Christy

Suzannah · Suzannah

...if that is the case then I need to make sure that my humility is true humility and not false humility. Being in control of my attitude means, for me at least, knowing what is in my mind and in my heart. My behaviour is what reveals my attitude for it shows what is in my mind and in my heart. That being the ca...

partlycloudy1 · partlycloudy1

Which was preceded by my first ever chat on the Alanon forum. What can I say? It all feels like I put on a new pair of shoes and I'm Cinderella, that's what. It fits like a dream. It's comfortable, it's comforting, and best of all, I was on the cusp before the meeting of the relief that was swift in coming...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Where I live, a law has recently been passed that cell phones must be hands-free when you are driving. I find it silly only in that dialing and texting are still okay. Huh? Anyhow, I lost my bluetooth device (that I had since Dec) about a week after the law came into effect and I haven't bought a new one ye...

maresie · maresie

As you all know I have been going out on dates. Recently I met three men, one an alcoholic in recovery (he has long term recovery), the others two different men. Guess who I feel most comfortable with? The recovering alcohoic has numerous red flags, smokes (I am asthmatic and really allergic to smoke...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Interesting... just 5 years ago I would have said that alcoholism or alcohol in general, had no impact on my life. Now, even though I am not engulfed in the active part of it, I feel surrounded. My brother is also an A in my life. Just a few years ago, he had a wonderful intact family. Now my sis-in-law is s...

angel123 · angel123

Sounds of the wild Consumes me Able to hear there whisper There calling There protection of there home Even a pea cock calling Sounding like a women calling for HELP !HELP! A wood pecker going at a tree To find his feed Robins bob bob bobbing along The surface of the ground I walk on to find there feed I once...

MayDay · MayDay

Hello everyone- I was looking over the other posts as I was debating (and have been for several months) whether to even join as a member, let alone post anything. I definitely found that I share all to well similar feelings. I come from a home where my mother was addicted to pain killers my entire life (st...

joyoma · joyoma

My surgery went without a hitch on Monday. By Tuesday I was up walking and by that afternoon had my chest tube removed. I came home today. So all went well...except that the nodule on my lung was indeed a malignant sarcoma. It was a mestasis from the primary leg tumor of last year. The standard treatme...

SmallSteps · SmallSteps

After going to a meeting, doing a little reading, taking inventory of my past relationships, and getting a few drunken phone calls this week, I think I'm ready to admit that the people I'm having trouble with currently are in fact alcoholics. I've also realized that all but one of the people I've been i...

maresie · maresie

One of my dogs is ill. She has a bad rash. She's had the rash on and off for years. So this week I have to go all out to help with the rash, get creams, bathe her, wash everything. She's had the rash on and off for years. I've had to give up trying to find what the cause is. I don't know. The rash gets better and it g...

Loupiness · Loupiness

My birthday is on Thurs, and as I have shared before, I don't really like birthdays. Of course, I like to be acknowledged, but absolutley do not enjoy being in the limelight. Well, my 2 older kids will both be gone on Thurs, my son at Boy Scout Camp and my daughter on vacation with my sister. I will just be ho...

MomGayle42 · MomGayle42

I am SO ANGRY! My oldest son has been talking with my A son with TBI. The A son is angry because I spoke with the extended family that A son has moved in with. They called me but that is besides the point, I had planned on calling them. And YES I explained the brain injury and A sons self distructive behavior....

nmike · nmike

I put two resumes in recently and received two rejection notices. One job reopened. I hope that I will get an interview this time. I think that I am well qualified. The codependent in me has taken off. I have mentally interviewed, received a job offer I couldn't refuse mainly because it is for more money...

JenniferN · JenniferN

I'm begining to hate Tuesday's. Last Tuesday he came home 2 1/2 hours after the meeting had let out. I had dinner prepared and sitting on the stove. No phone call. Nothing. Last night same thing except for the dinner being made. I had no clue as to where he was, IF he was ok, if the truck had broken down, ect....

partlycloudy1 · partlycloudy1

Hi, I'm Partlycloudy. I'm a recovering alcoholic with 3 years' continuous sobriety and recently my grown step daughter moved in with us after she abruptly left rehab for her addiction to painkillers. She was indigent; her drug-dealer husband who had a domestic violence warrant out against him f...

bugs39 · bugs39

Thanks to all your support. I have realized that I have reached my bottom. My AH is due home from a trip in 3 hours. I have prepared a heartfelt letter. I have left the choice up to him. If he chooses to join me along my journey it must be with acceptance, love, a recovery plan and ongoing sobriety. If...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I need to bring some thing up and hope I do not offend anyone here. I just have noticed that it seems that many folks here are into rescuing animals and wonder what the connection is (if any) between rescuing animals and wanting to be rescued...just a thought- don't go ballistic on me please!! Hugs, J.

mm18123 · mm18123

when DH (or whatever) got home. He did come to me to try and finish our "discussion" from last night. What he told me was stunning to me. He does not understand in any way shape or form why I want him to stop drinking, and furthermore he wants to know when I became such a damn teetotaler. The i...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

Al-Anon released a new book recently titled "Discovering Choices". I haven't read the entire thing yet but what I have read is very good. I can see using each personal story as the basis for a meeting in the near future. Sometimes it's difficult to come up with a new subject for meetings a...

charlescharles · charlescharles

haven't been here for a while since last we talked my girlfriend...who has been sober now for almst a week...thank god...got kicked out of her fathers place...shes thirty seven and still lives with him..relies on him..etc well..he kicked her out..once again...the man is a bit nuts and his daughter...

glad lee · glad lee

I went to a f2f meeting over the weekend and....as I was listening, a powerful thing came over me. Numerous shares were about how (they) were staying with their A because they "love them so much." It occurred to me, that I stayed with my A for 26 years....in a crazy, painful relationshi...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

(((((Family))))) Today (7-14-08) has been a day of reflections for me, as it is my 35th wedding anniversary. I have decided that I should make a list of things I am thankful for. 1. I am truly thankful for a husband that loves me. 2. I am thankful for the beautiful daughter we have. 3. I am thankful for my ho...

jaysbaby · jaysbaby

starring Benjamin Bratt... did anyone besides myself see this show on A & E lastnite? What did you think? I thought it was great... Ben plays a recovered addict, who is now a bounty hunter looking for drug, alcohol and gambling addicts... He has a team who helps him hunt down these addicts one by one...

maresie · maresie

One of my triggers is competition. One of my roommates I have realised is quite competitive with me over space, resources and other things. I find myself constantly butting up against him. I am not sure why since I go out of my way to avoid him. Last night I was washing my dished and he started hovering...

itsgot2bgd · itsgot2bgd

Hey y'all, I'm writing from the beach. I'm on vacation with my clean and sober A (but not practicing a program), and my two young kids. It's a beautiful place with an ocean view and a pool and a tikki bar. What more could I want? Just feeling a little unsettled here. Overwhlemed w/o the structure of home...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

((((((((((Paul))))))))))))))))), Just wanted to say happy birthday to you. Hehe I am posting this on the 1st, but I did not forget your birthday is on the 2nd. Hope you have a great experience at the conference. Thanks for being you, and please don't eat anything bigger than your head. See you in the ro...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I was driving down the road the other day thinking about my life choices and how I like things to be slightly chaotic and unpredictable and how I was drawn to that for so long and then something hit me. I was thinking about the A - he was a binge drinker - he was mostly reliable but a few times a year there wou...

cbu03 · cbu03

So, it's 6 in the morning and I have not had much sleep, because I have been up all night thinking about how I am so mad at my ah and myself. I am new to this program, and I am so frustrated. He has always drank in our garage, he would start from the minute he got off work to the minute he went to bed, leaving me in...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

you've heard the saying that 2 wrongs don't make a right...my partner and I have been fighting. Both of us have said and done things that we shouldn't have. I can't help feeling like I caused some of her actions because of my mouth. At the same time, I'm angry at what she did. The last few days all I have want...

liljeannie · liljeannie

"Are we dead?" is what my abf asked me last night while we were sitting at the table just staring at eachother for lack of something to say. I made a list of boundaries yesterday while he was at his 2nd group meeting which I presented to him when he got home. He told me he "understood&quo...

hopeful332 · hopeful332

How long does it take to be happy again after recovery? My daughter is doing well and working the program but she is really unhappy. She is committed to staying sober but cries a lot because she feels like she is faking her way through the day. She is hoping as she moves through the steps, this will come, bu...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am hanging in there! I feel kinda stressed today and the last week or so. But... my A has quit smoking for almost two weeks. He quit smoking before for 4 years. I am trying so hard to support him. I just get a little bit self-centered and forget to praise him and help him on his journey. I guess I am stil...

jaysbaby · jaysbaby

Hi everyone... I finally attended my first meeting over the weekend.. It was fantastic! It was an all women's group, and about 30 females attended. I told my story, and I listened to several other stories. I can't believe how many people are experiencing the same issues that I am. It's amazing how mu...

Leetle · Leetle

There are too many details to get out right now. The biggest thing is I am trying to transition my baby to daycare, so I can go back to work. She doesn't take milk from a bottle...at all...at present and so it is really upsetting. I am only using the daycare right now when I have interviews. I had one tod...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Ohana (family)!! It's been along time since I learned that thru all of the crises and chaos in my life my HP never left. I found out what that feeling behind me was when I stopped running around nuts and stood still. That gentle bump at my back was my HP gently rear ending me because my HP was follow...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Not sure that my daughter is listening to my grand-daughter, think she is too screwed up to really hear her daughter so, after a prayerful time I am handing it over to you God (HP) as I can do no more. In the meantime, talk to me God and tell me how to proceed; just make sure I understand the instructions. Aft...

buick23 · buick23

Yesterday was a good day. We had some "small talk" (he's very quiet nowdays), we were both nice to eachother, there were no arguments, I did not feel angry at him all day, he did not complain that there wasn't much to eat for dinner or that I didn't cook anything, I felt like he actually liked th...

Martina57 · Martina57

I hope it's ok to post something like this. I hope no one finds it offensive, just change the words of the song to "I know my Higher Power Lives" It just kind of made my day, my problems are really small.http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=8cf08faca5dd9ea45513

Martina57 · Martina57

I know this is so wrong, but it's so much easier. Am I the only one? After 29 years of marriage to an active AH I have simply decided that he can just do what he wants. I supply the alcohol (it gets me out of the house), he drinks it, I go about my business as I please (he questions nothing that I do, not that I do a...

liljeannie · liljeannie

Hello, This is my first post, though it shouldnt be. I have quietly been reading posts for about a year now, and finally got up the strength to post for myself. My story is not so different than anyone else's. The only thing that makes it unique is that it is mine. I have been with an active A for over six y...

new member hurting so bad · princessloretta

Hello everyone, this is my first post here and well I just came across this websight and thought i would give it a try. Hmm where to start, where to start... First off I have been married for 5 years to an alcoholic and well went into the marriage knowing he drank alot, not that he had a problem. See my husban...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Family, Just received a disturbing telephone call from my daughter. My middle grand-daughter has been seen by the school nurse as she sprained her ankle today and whilst being strapped up, the nurse noticed blood on my GD arm. When she investigated further she found that the sweet child had carved...

MomGayle42 · MomGayle42

I have written and shared about my son that suffered the traumatic brain injury last year. He has resently lost a job and had a set back... Depression something. Maybe I'm making excuse. Bottom line he has been homeless so went back to our home town, hooked up with some buddies and has been on a drinking b...

Chase · Chase

I have wanted to get on a message board for support like this for a long time...I tried another board last week and unfortunately never got a response from anyone- bummer...so now I found this one and it looks like a more active board so I hope I've found the place. My husband of almost 8 years is an alcoh...

maresie · maresie

As you all know I am isolated, financialy poor, emotionally poor, living in a tiny tiny space, surrounded by dysfunctional people, living pretty marginally. In the past I've always looked for rescue. These days I am trying to really listen when I meet people to see if they can meet my needs. That means...

luna starla · luna starla

hi. i've begun considering going to an al-anon meeting, and seeing if it applies to my situation... so maybe i can get some feedback here too. i'm 24. almost a year ago, i met a recovering alcoholic/addict. he's very open about these things. we became friends, and within about 2 months we were dati...

mm18123 · mm18123

I am new here. I so wish I didn't have to be here. I actually posted on another board back in April because I wasn't sure my DH was an AH. I was assured that he was. We've been married 16 years and have two young children. He drank when we first married - weekends only, never to get drunk. I'd have a coupl...

buick23 · buick23

Last night I had this horrible dream that someone I know that I haven't seen in many years tried to rape me. When he was not able to get my clothes off he held me so I couldn't move in front of him. He got himself off my rubbing on my back and it was disgusting. I screamed which woke me up and woke up my bf. I told hi...

buick23 · buick23

I have been thinking about this question for a while now - What attracted me to him in the first place? I was in need of someone to listen, care, someone to enjoy spending time with which I wasn't getting at the time from the man I was with (we had been living eachother apart for years). Well the guy seemed in...

harperd999 · harperd999

Has anyone else had to deal with an AH wetting the bed when he drinks too much beer? My AH usually drinks at least 12 beers a day on the weekdays after work and 18 to 24 beers from Friday to Sunday. Almost every Friday or Saturday night he wets the bed. He used to only wet the bed on occasion (once or twice a y...

Suzannah · Suzannah

after a difficult weekend... Something positive to ponder in all of life's strife...These special words were originally from Audrey Hepburn, when asked about her beauty tips For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.For a slim figure, share yo...

bugs39 · bugs39

I haven't posted here before and I am hoping to find some support. My husband is an A. I started putting up the boundaries last Sept. Since then he has left me and our two children (5 and 9) twice. All his doing, the aftermath of yet another binge. In Jan. he started anti depressents paxil, said th...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

I would say in my younger days, I may have gone looking for trouble, but didn't mean to. (age 19-20). I didn't know the consequences of my actions. However, once I settled down and married, I seem to feel that trouble comes looking for me. Hopefully, I can get that sign off my back, along with the o...

buick23 · buick23

I'm am getting more depressed every day over the last few days. My recovering bf has been acting very strange here lately. He's very quiet, does not talk to me much at all. When I say something he snaps at me. I feel like he hates me and I asked him if he does and he left. I just can't take it anymore. When I thin...

glad · glad

I am so thankful today, even though I have struggles I know when / if I am involved in something unhealthy- I have the power to use my mind and make a decision to be involved or not. I noticed from reading another post about addictions that it is obvious our A's either don't have the "inner guidance&q...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I Have A Confesion To Make (Preview) Hello All, I have always taken a little pride (not always a good thing) in the fact that I have "NEVER" been late to one of our Al-Anon meetings, and I go twice a week for the past two years. Sometimes members will drag in 5 minutes or so late, not me I'm always there 15 or 20 minutes early to...	RLC	7	772	Jul 19, 2008 by Maria123
	Had a visit with my AH (Preview) It's been 8 weeks since my AH and I separated. I've been attending f2f Al-Anon meetings since - wonderful stuff there, and posting here - what a blessing! Today's brief visit with my AH went okay. He wasn't drunk during our visit. I could still smell the alcohol on his breath from last night's binge. My...	AJ	4	635	Jul 18, 2008 by AJ
	Question About Detachment (Preview) I've been wondering lately where that fine line between detachment with love and taking care of someone you love lies. I know not to take care of things he can obviously do on his own: like getting up in the morning, cooking, making appointments things like that. But I guess I'm having difficulty with t...	JenniferN	10	537	Jul 18, 2008 by AJ
	Intervention success? (Preview) My AH was doing pretty good for the last several months.I noticed he was sneaking drinks again here and there but it wasn't bad.Then I went away to camp for a week and came home to a nightmare. He is in full blown again.I talked to a good friend of his who is suggesting an intervention. Here is where it gets c...	Totally Heartbroken	10	578	Jul 18, 2008 by AJ
	HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! (Preview) HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOUPINESS!!! I know we're not to give advice, let alone an order but...... You have a wonderful day!! That's an order!!!! Christy	Christy	10	552	Jul 18, 2008 by Loupiness
	Gratitude leads to humility...so I am told... (Preview) ...if that is the case then I need to make sure that my humility is true humility and not false humility. Being in control of my attitude means, for me at least, knowing what is in my mind and in my heart. My behaviour is what reveals my attitude for it shows what is in my mind and in my heart. That being the ca...	Suzannah	6	450	Jul 18, 2008 by Jerry F
	A report back from my first ever Alanon meeting (long) (Preview) Which was preceded by my first ever chat on the Alanon forum. What can I say? It all feels like I put on a new pair of shoes and I'm Cinderella, that's what. It fits like a dream. It's comfortable, it's comforting, and best of all, I was on the cusp before the meeting of the relief that was swift in coming...	partlycloudy1	10	648	Jul 18, 2008 by partlycloudy1
	I'm not as important as I think I am... (Preview) Where I live, a law has recently been passed that cell phones must be hands-free when you are driving. I find it silly only in that dialing and texting are still okay. Huh? Anyhow, I lost my bluetooth device (that I had since Dec) about a week after the law came into effect and I haven't bought a new one ye...	Loupiness	6	694	Jul 18, 2008 by Minnehaha
	dating in recovery (Preview) As you all know I have been going out on dates. Recently I met three men, one an alcoholic in recovery (he has long term recovery), the others two different men. Guess who I feel most comfortable with? The recovering alcohoic has numerous red flags, smokes (I am asthmatic and really allergic to smoke...	maresie	17	587	Jul 18, 2008 by maresie
	when is it okay to move on? (Preview) Interesting... just 5 years ago I would have said that alcoholism or alcohol in general, had no impact on my life. Now, even though I am not engulfed in the active part of it, I feel surrounded. My brother is also an A in my life. Just a few years ago, he had a wonderful intact family. Now my sis-in-law is s...	Loupiness	10	703	Jul 18, 2008 by Diva
	Sounds of the wild (Preview) Sounds of the wild Consumes me Able to hear there whisper There calling There protection of there home Even a pea cock calling Sounding like a women calling for HELP !HELP! A wood pecker going at a tree To find his feed Robins bob bob bobbing along The surface of the ground I walk on to find there feed I once...	angel123	0	402	Jul 18, 2008 by angel123
	Hey...I am new (Preview) Hello everyone- I was looking over the other posts as I was debating (and have been for several months) whether to even join as a member, let alone post anything. I definitely found that I share all to well similar feelings. I come from a home where my mother was addicted to pain killers my entire life (st...	MayDay	6	480	Jul 18, 2008 by angel66
	surgery over (Preview) My surgery went without a hitch on Monday. By Tuesday I was up walking and by that afternoon had my chest tube removed. I came home today. So all went well...except that the nodule on my lung was indeed a malignant sarcoma. It was a mestasis from the primary leg tumor of last year. The standard treatme...	joyoma	13	597	Jul 17, 2008 by Loupiness
	Ok, I'm ready to admit it... (Preview) After going to a meeting, doing a little reading, taking inventory of my past relationships, and getting a few drunken phone calls this week, I think I'm ready to admit that the people I'm having trouble with currently are in fact alcoholics. I've also realized that all but one of the people I've been i...	SmallSteps	7	629	Jul 17, 2008 by SmallSteps
	catastrophizing (Preview) One of my dogs is ill. She has a bad rash. She's had the rash on and off for years. So this week I have to go all out to help with the rash, get creams, bathe her, wash everything. She's had the rash on and off for years. I've had to give up trying to find what the cause is. I don't know. The rash gets better and it g...	maresie	10	717	Jul 17, 2008 by maresie
	I don't want to celebrate! (Preview) My birthday is on Thurs, and as I have shared before, I don't really like birthdays. Of course, I like to be acknowledged, but absolutley do not enjoy being in the limelight. Well, my 2 older kids will both be gone on Thurs, my son at Boy Scout Camp and my daughter on vacation with my sister. I will just be ho...	Loupiness	13	808	Jul 17, 2008 by Loupiness
	How do I always end up being blamed....? (Preview) I am SO ANGRY! My oldest son has been talking with my A son with TBI. The A son is angry because I spoke with the extended family that A son has moved in with. They called me but that is besides the point, I had planned on calling them. And YES I explained the brain injury and A sons self distructive behavior....	MomGayle42	11	543	Jul 17, 2008 by thinkstoomuch
	What's wrong with my thinking? (Preview) I put two resumes in recently and received two rejection notices. One job reopened. I hope that I will get an interview this time. I think that I am well qualified. The codependent in me has taken off. I have mentally interviewed, received a job offer I couldn't refuse mainly because it is for more money...	nmike	5	697	Jul 17, 2008 by maire rua
	Thought About Leaving (Preview) I'm begining to hate Tuesday's. Last Tuesday he came home 2 1/2 hours after the meeting had let out. I had dinner prepared and sitting on the stove. No phone call. Nothing. Last night same thing except for the dinner being made. I had no clue as to where he was, IF he was ok, if the truck had broken down, ect....	JenniferN	6	451	Jul 17, 2008 by CJ
	A newbie and a question for you (Preview) Hi, I'm Partlycloudy. I'm a recovering alcoholic with 3 years' continuous sobriety and recently my grown step daughter moved in with us after she abruptly left rehab for her addiction to painkillers. She was indigent; her drug-dealer husband who had a domestic violence warrant out against him f...	partlycloudy1	11	562	Jul 17, 2008 by Jean4444
	Ultimatum or boundary ?? (Preview) Thanks to all your support. I have realized that I have reached my bottom. My AH is due home from a trip in 3 hours. I have prepared a heartfelt letter. I have left the choice up to him. If he chooses to join me along my journey it must be with acceptance, love, a recovery plan and ongoing sobriety. If...	bugs39	11	583	Jul 16, 2008 by norwood
	rescue and rescuing (Preview) I need to bring some thing up and hope I do not offend anyone here. I just have noticed that it seems that many folks here are into rescuing animals and wonder what the connection is (if any) between rescuing animals and wanting to be rescued...just a thought- don't go ballistic on me please!! Hugs, J.	Jean4444	7	607	Jul 16, 2008 by Martina57
	It got worse (Preview) when DH (or whatever) got home. He did come to me to try and finish our "discussion" from last night. What he told me was stunning to me. He does not understand in any way shape or form why I want him to stop drinking, and furthermore he wants to know when I became such a damn teetotaler. The i...	mm18123	12	493	Jul 16, 2008 by kitty
	Al-Anon's new book (Preview) Al-Anon released a new book recently titled "Discovering Choices". I haven't read the entire thing yet but what I have read is very good. I can see using each personal story as the basis for a meeting in the near future. Sometimes it's difficult to come up with a new subject for meetings a...	Mobirdie	5	510	Jul 16, 2008 by SmallSteps
	hello (Preview) haven't been here for a while since last we talked my girlfriend...who has been sober now for almst a week...thank god...got kicked out of her fathers place...shes thirty seven and still lives with him..relies on him..etc well..he kicked her out..once again...the man is a bit nuts and his daughter...	charlescharles	8	532	Jul 16, 2008 by Bettina
	Is it "love" or my codependency? (Preview) I went to a f2f meeting over the weekend and....as I was listening, a powerful thing came over me. Numerous shares were about how (they) were staying with their A because they "love them so much." It occurred to me, that I stayed with my A for 26 years....in a crazy, painful relationshi...	glad lee	7	623	Jul 16, 2008 by maresie
	REFLECTIONS (Preview) (((((Family))))) Today (7-14-08) has been a day of reflections for me, as it is my 35th wedding anniversary. I have decided that I should make a list of things I am thankful for. 1. I am truly thankful for a husband that loves me. 2. I am thankful for the beautiful daughter we have. 3. I am thankful for my ho...	cookie1971	6	467	Jul 16, 2008 by buick23
	New T.V. Show, "The Cleaner" (Preview) starring Benjamin Bratt... did anyone besides myself see this show on A & E lastnite? What did you think? I thought it was great... Ben plays a recovered addict, who is now a bounty hunter looking for drug, alcohol and gambling addicts... He has a team who helps him hunt down these addicts one by one...	jaysbaby	4	510	Jul 16, 2008 by SmallSteps
	Dealing with triggers (Preview) One of my triggers is competition. One of my roommates I have realised is quite competitive with me over space, resources and other things. I find myself constantly butting up against him. I am not sure why since I go out of my way to avoid him. Last night I was washing my dished and he started hovering...	maresie	1	330	Jul 16, 2008 by maresie
	Wherever you go, there you are (Preview) Hey y'all, I'm writing from the beach. I'm on vacation with my clean and sober A (but not practicing a program), and my two young kids. It's a beautiful place with an ocean view and a pool and a tikki bar. What more could I want? Just feeling a little unsettled here. Overwhlemed w/o the structure of home...	itsgot2bgd	5	606	Jul 16, 2008 by maresie
	Happy Birthday Norwood :) (Preview) ((((((((((Paul))))))))))))))))), Just wanted to say happy birthday to you. Hehe I am posting this on the 1st, but I did not forget your birthday is on the 2nd. Hope you have a great experience at the conference. Thanks for being you, and please don't eat anything bigger than your head. See you in the ro...	Mandy123	11	652	Jul 16, 2008 by aunitedway
	A strange revelation (Preview) I was driving down the road the other day thinking about my life choices and how I like things to be slightly chaotic and unpredictable and how I was drawn to that for so long and then something hit me. I was thinking about the A - he was a binge drinker - he was mostly reliable but a few times a year there wou...	carolinagirl	10	620	Jul 16, 2008 by Karilynn
	needing to vent (Preview) So, it's 6 in the morning and I have not had much sleep, because I have been up all night thinking about how I am so mad at my ah and myself. I am new to this program, and I am so frustrated. He has always drank in our garage, he would start from the minute he got off work to the minute he went to bed, leaving me in...	cbu03	5	378	Jul 16, 2008 by cbu03
	blame and responsibility (Preview) you've heard the saying that 2 wrongs don't make a right...my partner and I have been fighting. Both of us have said and done things that we shouldn't have. I can't help feeling like I caused some of her actions because of my mouth. At the same time, I'm angry at what she did. The last few days all I have want...	seekingserenity	4	390	Jul 16, 2008 by Jean4444
	Are we dead? (Preview) "Are we dead?" is what my abf asked me last night while we were sitting at the table just staring at eachother for lack of something to say. I made a list of boundaries yesterday while he was at his 2nd group meeting which I presented to him when he got home. He told me he "understood&quo...	liljeannie	6	600	Jul 16, 2008 by Jerry F
	Will she ever be happy again? (Preview) How long does it take to be happy again after recovery? My daughter is doing well and working the program but she is really unhappy. She is committed to staying sober but cries a lot because she feels like she is faking her way through the day. She is hoping as she moves through the steps, this will come, bu...	hopeful332	6	1061	Jul 15, 2008 by Maria123
	Hanging in there! (Preview) I am hanging in there! I feel kinda stressed today and the last week or so. But... my A has quit smoking for almost two weeks. He quit smoking before for 4 years. I am trying so hard to support him. I just get a little bit self-centered and forget to praise him and help him on his journey. I guess I am stil...	Hoot Nanny	3	494	Jul 15, 2008 by cookie1971
	My first Al- Anon meeting (Preview) Hi everyone... I finally attended my first meeting over the weekend.. It was fantastic! It was an all women's group, and about 30 females attended. I told my story, and I listened to several other stories. I can't believe how many people are experiencing the same issues that I am. It's amazing how mu...	jaysbaby	5	464	Jul 15, 2008 by Maria123
	Finding life so loud, I'm worried I can't hear God's plan for me... (Preview) There are too many details to get out right now. The biggest thing is I am trying to transition my baby to daycare, so I can go back to work. She doesn't take milk from a bottle...at all...at present and so it is really upsetting. I am only using the daycare right now when I have interviews. I had one tod...	Leetle	6	682	Jul 15, 2008 by Maria123
	So I said to my HP...not now please!! (Preview) Aloha Ohana (family)!! It's been along time since I learned that thru all of the crises and chaos in my life my HP never left. I found out what that feeling behind me was when I stopped running around nuts and stood still. That gentle bump at my back was my HP gently rear ending me because my HP was follow...	Jerry F	10	682	Jul 15, 2008 by Maria123
	Ok God (of my understanding) - over to you... (Preview) Not sure that my daughter is listening to my grand-daughter, think she is too screwed up to really hear her daughter so, after a prayerful time I am handing it over to you God (HP) as I can do no more. In the meantime, talk to me God and tell me how to proceed; just make sure I understand the instructions. Aft...	Suzannah	3	513	Jul 15, 2008 by Maria123
	A good day (Preview) Yesterday was a good day. We had some "small talk" (he's very quiet nowdays), we were both nice to eachother, there were no arguments, I did not feel angry at him all day, he did not complain that there wasn't much to eat for dinner or that I didn't cook anything, I felt like he actually liked th...	buick23	6	391	Jul 15, 2008 by Maria123
	This may make you cry (Preview) I hope it's ok to post something like this. I hope no one finds it offensive, just change the words of the song to "I know my Higher Power Lives" It just kind of made my day, my problems are really small.http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=8cf08faca5dd9ea45513	Martina57	0	407	Jul 15, 2008 by Martina57
	Anyone else just chosen to enable??? (Preview) I know this is so wrong, but it's so much easier. Am I the only one? After 29 years of marriage to an active AH I have simply decided that he can just do what he wants. I supply the alcohol (it gets me out of the house), he drinks it, I go about my business as I please (he questions nothing that I do, not that I do a...	Martina57	16	561	Jul 15, 2008 by Martina57
	stuck on the merry go round (Preview) Hello, This is my first post, though it shouldnt be. I have quietly been reading posts for about a year now, and finally got up the strength to post for myself. My story is not so different than anyone else's. The only thing that makes it unique is that it is mine. I have been with an active A for over six y...	liljeannie	6	426	Jul 15, 2008 by carolinagirl
	new member hurting so bad (Preview) Hello everyone, this is my first post here and well I just came across this websight and thought i would give it a try. Hmm where to start, where to start... First off I have been married for 5 years to an alcoholic and well went into the marriage knowing he drank alot, not that he had a problem. See my husban...	princessloretta	12	627	Jul 15, 2008 by princessloretta
	Self harm...thirteen year old grand-daughter...for pity's sake...what can I do... (Preview) Family, Just received a disturbing telephone call from my daughter. My middle grand-daughter has been seen by the school nurse as she sprained her ankle today and whilst being strapped up, the nurse noticed blood on my GD arm. When she investigated further she found that the sweet child had carved...	Suzannah	8	709	Jul 15, 2008 by paulaque
	I would appriciate some opinions.... (Preview) I have written and shared about my son that suffered the traumatic brain injury last year. He has resently lost a job and had a set back... Depression something. Maybe I'm making excuse. Bottom line he has been homeless so went back to our home town, hooked up with some buddies and has been on a drinking b...	MomGayle42	7	600	Jul 15, 2008 by paulaque
	new here... (Preview) I have wanted to get on a message board for support like this for a long time...I tried another board last week and unfortunately never got a response from anyone- bummer...so now I found this one and it looks like a more active board so I hope I've found the place. My husband of almost 8 years is an alcoh...	Chase	5	486	Jul 15, 2008 by Chase
	Meeting my needs (Preview) As you all know I am isolated, financialy poor, emotionally poor, living in a tiny tiny space, surrounded by dysfunctional people, living pretty marginally. In the past I've always looked for rescue. These days I am trying to really listen when I meet people to see if they can meet my needs. That means...	maresie	5	414	Jul 14, 2008 by Jean4444
	wondering if i should attend/belong at a meeting (Preview) hi. i've begun considering going to an al-anon meeting, and seeing if it applies to my situation... so maybe i can get some feedback here too. i'm 24. almost a year ago, i met a recovering alcoholic/addict. he's very open about these things. we became friends, and within about 2 months we were dati...	luna starla	9	1145	Jul 14, 2008 by cookie1971
	Nothing but pain (Preview) I am new here. I so wish I didn't have to be here. I actually posted on another board back in April because I wasn't sure my DH was an AH. I was assured that he was. We've been married 16 years and have two young children. He drank when we first married - weekends only, never to get drunk. I'd have a coupl...	mm18123	4	569	Jul 14, 2008 by Maria123
	horrible dream (Preview) Last night I had this horrible dream that someone I know that I haven't seen in many years tried to rape me. When he was not able to get my clothes off he held me so I couldn't move in front of him. He got himself off my rubbing on my back and it was disgusting. I screamed which woke me up and woke up my bf. I told hi...	buick23	5	486	Jul 14, 2008 by buick23
	what attracted me to him in the first place? (Preview) I have been thinking about this question for a while now - What attracted me to him in the first place? I was in need of someone to listen, care, someone to enjoy spending time with which I wasn't getting at the time from the man I was with (we had been living eachother apart for years). Well the guy seemed in...	buick23	8	655	Jul 14, 2008 by Jean4444
	Tired of AH wetting the bed (Preview) Has anyone else had to deal with an AH wetting the bed when he drinks too much beer? My AH usually drinks at least 12 beers a day on the weekdays after work and 18 to 24 beers from Friday to Sunday. Almost every Friday or Saturday night he wets the bed. He used to only wet the bed on occasion (once or twice a y...	harperd999	10	757	Jul 14, 2008 by cookie1971
	:sun: after a difficult weekend (Preview) after a difficult weekend... Something positive to ponder in all of life's strife...These special words were originally from Audrey Hepburn, when asked about her beauty tips For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.For a slim figure, share yo...	Suzannah	1	374	Jul 14, 2008 by cookie1971
	Boundaries (Preview) I haven't posted here before and I am hoping to find some support. My husband is an A. I started putting up the boundaries last Sept. Since then he has left me and our two children (5 and 9) twice. All his doing, the aftermath of yet another binge. In Jan. he started anti depressents paxil, said th...	bugs39	5	556	Jul 14, 2008 by maresie
	Looking for Trouble or Does Trouble Find You? (Preview) I would say in my younger days, I may have gone looking for trouble, but didn't mean to. (age 19-20). I didn't know the consequences of my actions. However, once I settled down and married, I seem to feel that trouble comes looking for me. Hopefully, I can get that sign off my back, along with the o...	wallsal55	6	469	Jul 14, 2008 by SmallSteps
	need to vent (Preview) I'm am getting more depressed every day over the last few days. My recovering bf has been acting very strange here lately. He's very quiet, does not talk to me much at all. When I say something he snaps at me. I feel like he hates me and I asked him if he does and he left. I just can't take it anymore. When I thin...	buick23	5	441	Jul 14, 2008 by buick23
	Thankful (Preview) I am so thankful today, even though I have struggles I know when / if I am involved in something unhealthy- I have the power to use my mind and make a decision to be involved or not. I noticed from reading another post about addictions that it is obvious our A's either don't have the "inner guidance&q...	glad	5	436	Jul 14, 2008 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.