Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

"There is almost no work in life as hard as waiting. And yet my Higher Power wants me to wait. All motion is easier than calm waiting, and yet I must wait. So many people have marred their work and hindered the growth of their spiritual lives by too much activity. If I wait patiently, preparing mysel...

Susie Q · Susie Q

Divorcing the alcoholic...when it's over is it ever really over? I have been divorced several months now and the alcoholic is still trying to get back with me. I have been very ambivalent about the whole deal and I know I need to set better boundaries. I still am in love with him, but the drinking hasn't s...

mon123 · mon123

I haven't been to MIP for quite a while I thought I'd just say Hi and decide to visit more often. When I first came here my husband was still drinking. This site took me through that trauma and saw me to my first 'real' Alanon meeting. I began working my program in 2004. MIP also saw me through my seperation a...

Dini · Dini

Hello! I have been married for 21 years. The early years of our marriage were very shakey - with him getting very drunk on a regular basis, losing his license, spending the night in jail. It was hard and always my fault. Don't remember how it happened, but that is when I first discovered Al-Anon. It was my...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Family...Walking up Sunday just outside of the reach of the flames and bringing it here one of our membership suggested from her own recovery experiences that I take a 10step look at it. That is usually my practice however the suggestion keyed a deeper 10th step than usual and one of the things t...

woopsadaisy · woopsadaisy

Hello- I haven't been able to make it to any meetings F2F for a while, but the chemistry was off. It was mostly old women, or people who really grew up with and live in alcoholic families. I didn't feel that I fit in... felt sorta foolish for going to Al Anon for marajuana use and a porn habit. I am not even sur...

hopeful123 · hopeful123

Hi everyone, I haven't posted to this site in over 6 months, I'm sure. It saved me from a lot of heartache when I needed it most, and I have thought about everyone on here every day, ever since. I mostly stopped posting bc I was healing nicely. The ex and I stopped communicating all together and when we h...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Sorry I haven't been on much lately, I've been lurking though and trying to keep up with everyone. Just haven't felt like I had much good to offer anyone this week. I went to the Dr. Tuesday to find that I again, have some health issues that need to be dealt with, which I am doing, but it through me for a bit o...

Tracy · Tracy

Wow, al non brings me back to the mirror again!! I have been hormonal for a week my thinking goes very negative. What do I do, I should have rang my sponsor but I never, I went with the negativity. It ended by me sending my Sober AB packing. He doesnot drink, he has a job and pays some bills today. I was ups...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I received the following yesterday from my first sponsor and it is still cracking me up so wanted to share it. Enjoy Barb I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, And all the patients were shouting, '13.....13....13.' The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a Little gap in the plank...

Melissa21 · Melissa21

I'm not even with him anymore and still it's all lies, lies and lies. Im tired of it! Even the littlest things are LIES! I asked him a couple months ago why do you have to keep lying? He says why does it matter we aren't together anymore. Yeah that's right but I don't go around asking him questions to catch hi...

sheila45 · sheila45

So last night I joined here and went to bed exhausted and actually slept on and off today because I haven't truly slept in so long. Gave it to my HP again ya know----felt the weight lifted again after a day of bursting into tears several times when something would remind me of GOOD times with my addict so...

Jerry F · Jerry F

And double Wow!!...What the hell!! Cunning Powerful and Baffling...sometimes just doesn't do the discription any justice. Having lots of time in program doesn't mean I'm cured. So my morning meeting was in full swing and going great. The sharing was right on and we discussing relapse and I fo...

Aloha · Aloha

Yes, I still have times where that itty bitty cell phone of mine suddenly appears as cumbersome and un-welcoming as a gigantic stone monolith. But I did it again - remembering what my sponsor tells me often... "When you're down or unhappy or angry, you need to do different than what you've been do...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Have had harsh words this evening with AH. I said it wasn't meant to be like this. After nearly 38 years together I wasn't meant to despise him. Amongst a lot of other things I asked him (not for 1st time) just where is his rock-bottom? It must be very low down indeed. I am so defeated. Everyone else seem...

Tracy · Tracy

I have just asked my sober AB to leave he has taken all his stuff and gone to his mumsI am hormonal which has played a part but its more than that, Why did I do this? 1. we both work full time at weekends he watches his son play football then comes home and falls asleep. I am left to do most of the chores (gettin...

Data395 · Data395

Dane, Alanon. I am extremely upset right now. My wife is sucidal right now. She is devastated. Some ppl were mean to her last night at her online AA meeting. It's not at MIP, it's somewhere else. Anway, she was trying to train to lead meetings at this place online and they put her thru what I thought was so m...

Overcome · Overcome

When I joined a 12-step program 19 years ago, it was ACOA, and it was on the suggestion of a friend. I am not the adult child of an alcoholic, but I drug my co-dependant boyfriend there, who was an ACOA. This was the first sign of my dysfunction. That program did help me as it showed me a lot of my codependent...

richard · richard

I have gone into detail about my 30 years of age son, who is living with me now. In short, because of severe childhood abuse and torture, untreated closed head injury, he reasoning challenged, self-esteem is in the toilet, still confused about boundaries. He has had major surgery on his foot and his...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, It has been a week since my hub moved out. He spent time here this weekend and I know we need to get through this, but I am looking forward to being on the other side of the pain....whenever that is. It is so hard to stay strong and stick with asking him to leave and telling him I want the marriage to b...

barisax · barisax

It has now been two months since Drama Goddess went into the psych ward. I haven't seen her or talked to her since then, get periodic updates from her mom - she has had her ups and downs. I don't know where she stands or the details. I just know I miss her very much. As far as I know, she has never drank alcoh...

stillkickin · stillkickin

As most of you know, this year has been very hard on me and my family. I never totally understood life itself, in how sometimes things seem like they couldn't possibly get worse.....and then suddenly they take another step deeper into negativity. My uncle just passed away tonight. He was diagnosed on...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((((((((((Friends)))))))))), Last night I came into the meeting for a very short time to share the pain i was going thru with my daughter.... She was in a terrible car accident....she is doing well today, she has a fractured cheek bone and a terrible laceration over her eye....a plastic surgeon su...

leo · leo

Hi posting number two just remembered my sign in info hello everyone again. Refer to post by return that is me. lol

arags · arags

Hello everyone, thank you for being here, grateful for Al anon. Need a meeting before the meeting. I got back in the ring with my addict this week. I want to say that I have no idea how it happened. Like Mon/Tues I was setting boundaries, and Sat night I am listening to the sound of pill bottles openin...

brightmommy · brightmommy

It has been a while since I have logged in as I have lost internet connection at my home. I am currently going through a divorce. It truly is the hardest thing I have ever been through in my life even harder than active alcoholism with him. I am having trouble letting go. I feel like my world is falling a...

maresie · maresie

My update is that I still have not received a replacement check. I made no less than ten phone calls on Friday about it. I got absolutely nowhere. I am having to keep turning this over otherwise I start foaming at the mouth with frustration. I did have an epiphany on Friday that this was my life 24/7 when...

Amom · Amom

Hi, I am new here. I live in the country pretty far from most Alanon meetings. I have been to some but haven't found a place yet where I feel comfortable and can get to on a regular basis. I have a son who is an addict. He just turned 19. In hindsight I think he has been using for several years. He also seems t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am finding serenity in spending time with me. It is so funny because years ago, I couldn't stand being alone. Today I realize that my HP is with me all the time anyway. So...as I sit in my chair. I enjoy reading, doing crossword puzzles & most of all listening to a variety of music on my Walkman CD pl...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, I last posted that my "A" hub is gone has moved out. Thursday nights is a night I usually a f2f meeting. My hub asked if he could come stay with the kids while I went to the meeting and I said sure. He got to my house before I got off work, with permission. He is depending on other people to tra...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, The saturday morning meeting is in much need of member support. And just a quick reminder the weekend morning meetings start at 10am Eastern......7am Pacific. I guess we had some come in at 9am looking for a meeting. It is early for me to chair this meeting...so if you want to see a west coast gal a...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Just need some feedback here, so I can quit obsessing Why do I care what my exAH and his A g/f (both sober?) think, and thus say, about me? Controlling, narcissistic, a liar... lots of names for me. Funny thing is, they describe me exactly as what I think of them. AH runs everything by her and seeks h...

gknee · gknee

New chapter......today I am picking up my AH from inpt treatment that he has been in since Monday nite. I was just so happy to get him out of the house, I didn't really think about the other side of it. I am not looking forward to bringing him home-- because then I have to deal with him. Out of sight, out of min...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I have been talking to my ex A a LOT lately, he is getting ready to move back to this area in a week - we'll see how that goes. He just left a girlfriend who he went to California with and that lasted about two months and she has been sending him nasty messages, etc. He said to me... She needs to do it like you di...

Diva · Diva

Thinking of all of you while on vacation here in Newport, Rhode Island. I am having fun in this beautiful place, but all of you are never out of my mind. A is behaving himself. YAY!!! Best wishes to all, Diva

return · return

Hi everyone this is Leo. It has been so long since I was on here that I forgot all my user information to get in so I am using the name return lol. It is so nice to see you are all still here and I am just going through the old posts. Hope that life has been kind to you and Hp giving you strength and courage to get...

db55 · db55

Bravo to my AH. Today is nine months sober for him! It is the longest he has been sober since he and I have been together. We were talking last night and he said, "I would have had 13 years if I didn't start drinking again when we got together 8 years ago." Hmmmm, what the heck does that mean.....

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

My AS is on a binge this week, my nerves are frayed. We live in a small town and he lives too close to our family for us not to be caught up in his drama. He is always at my back door for a hand out, I give him what he needs just to get by on. He will plead and beg until I have no strength left to say no. It is getting t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I feel so much better now that I let go some of my anxieties about my illness. I needed to get all that out so I can move on. Today is a much better day than Tuesday when I posted all that to all of you. It was very scary to open up to you. I am learning to accept myself today. I am much better off doing that. I ev...

SWgal · SWgal

I am not perfect, but I am not a bad mom, as AH wants me to believe. I am the one who is with my kids 95% of the time. He is busy coaching during the week and/or going to the gym after work and coming home when he feels like it, and then binge drinking on the weekends, staying out until 5 a.m. and spending the dayli...

Christy · Christy

I wanted to share part of a conversation that my son and I had. A little background...growing up my son rarely saw his father sober. My A would hit the bar before he came home from work and leave fairly early on weekends to do the same. (now sober almost 4 yrs.) My son is 19, leaving lots of years to build r...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Spoke to my sponsor last night. She called right when I received a text from my ex that I was contemplating my response to. We talked about keeping simplicity in and insanity out. We talked of "Easy Does It". "Yep", I said, "I got it". Then we hung up and what did I do...

Aloha · Aloha

One of our Al-Anon family is going to be moving back to the mainland. I am sad, as I will miss her. She's always had such wonderful shares and she has this contagious laughter that I love. One thing I found out about her is that she actually started many of the meetings in my area. Her funny reason for starti...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha family; The day before yesterday I told a sponsee that I would support him by being at his father's funeral. His Dad just died from brain cancer and my sponsee who works this program pretty darn well attended to his part of that event like the recovering member he is. I got there just a little ear...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

I love the reminder..."Let it begin with me" how many times have I wondered... how things could change.. when others would see their true purpose... when others could find their true light.. how healing could help another... if only they would do this or that... until I remember the sayin...

Data395 · Data395

Hi, Dane here, grateful newcomer in Alanon. :) I've been having a hard time again with my brand new wife. she is in recovery; she's been in it for years, but she still has issues and emotional problems. A relative of hers just passed away and I've been there for her a lot. The other night, I was up with her b...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, Whelp my hub is gone. Moved out Sunday. I wasn't sure he was really gone, but I found out he is. I was all weird how it happend, but most of this situation has all been weird. He took off Sunday after I told him I wouldn't do something. So he was punishing me by leaving, not knowing where he was, and not c...

Ness · Ness

My Ason is off the streets .....back, via a short stint in rehab, in the accommodation he nearly drank himself to death in a few months ago.....it just feels like the circle of hell is complete. I feel so despondent today..... I know Im powerless over his disease..... Im relieved he has a roof over his h...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi everyone, I dot know where to start my partner has been sober for nearly 6 months and I am so proud of him. But I am still struggling with the damage this disease has done. I know he is sick, I know he loves me and never wanted to hurt me or anyone else. But today if he so much as does not do his chores all the o...

Gailey · Gailey

I thought I would post instead of just reading today when I noticed that there was not one new topic since this morning. That started to make me sad like maybe everyone was starting to lose interest in the site. I sure hope not! My son (the one in 28 day rehab) said to me last night..."Mom, you have to g...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Saw this, realized how much like the Alanon message we learn each day directs us in this exact same thinking: It will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking.. Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoo...

tryingtofindaway2009 · tryingtofindaway2009

He relapsed! coughing up blood and lung tissue he just laughs and says he is dying! Do i stay and watch him kill himself a little more each day or do i leave in hopes that he will come around? I'm lost... about two weeks ago i found this site and made my first post. thank you all who responded with support and a...

Hawk120025 · Hawk120025

It's been 3 months since I broke up with my ABF and I find I still have moments where I am angry with him for being such a helpless drunk and ruining our relationship. It just pi**e* me off! I wish he (the memories, anger, hurt, etc.) would just go away. I haven't heard from him since I dumped him in his p...

Aloha · Aloha

(I have quoted a paragraph from the book... so I'll understand if this post needs to be removed - just let me know if you had to remove it, mods. Thanks!) It is a very rare occasion when I'm sitting reading a book in quiet solitude and find myself bursting out laughing at something I've read. (Normally I mi...

Overcome · Overcome

I was thumbing through the C2C meditation book the other day, looking for a topic for a meeting and came across one that "I" had written in the margin that wasn't in the index. I had entitled it "illusions" because that seemed to me to be the focus of the reading on July 26, pg 208 of t...

Shellybelly · Shellybelly

im doing alanon online only as im scared to go to real life meeting but im told your meant to have a sponser to help you go thru the steps properly now i dont have one how do you get one or do you get one when your only doing it online you see i want to do this right

tryingtofindaway2009 · tryingtofindaway2009

Hello thank you again for ll your support, I'm looking for face to face meetings in vancouver and definately wanting to go, I took away his car and gave it up so he didn't have such an easy way of leaving in the middle of the night. I told him that he had to start working again. I felt powered by all of your post...

frustrated · frustrated

My husband is in recovery and has been for a little over two years. He went to rehab a little over two years ago because of his performance at work. He managed to maintain his sobriety 6 months and then he struggled for about a year and a half off and on the wagon. In August I was away on a business trip. He dran...

usedup64 · usedup64

I love a man more than life. We have been in relationship for 3 years. I was not aware of the fact he was alcoholic in the first year. We became engaged and i would love to marry him. He says things will get better if I commit. Well, he moved two and a half hours away and because I now realize the extent of his pr...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Well the weekend started out great. Made my F2F Friday and it was amazing.....HP spoke to me again and I left with all the empty spots filling full:) Had my date Sat night and it went well also. This guy is sooo very different...I'm guessing probally because he doesn't have an alcohol or drug addictio...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	This spoke to me today (Preview) "There is almost no work in life as hard as waiting. And yet my Higher Power wants me to wait. All motion is easier than calm waiting, and yet I must wait. So many people have marred their work and hindered the growth of their spiritual lives by too much activity. If I wait patiently, preparing mysel...	carolinagirl	5	510	Oct 22, 2009 by richard
	Letting Go... (Preview) Divorcing the alcoholic...when it's over is it ever really over? I have been divorced several months now and the alcoholic is still trying to get back with me. I have been very ambivalent about the whole deal and I know I need to set better boundaries. I still am in love with him, but the drinking hasn't s...	Susie Q	2	707	Oct 21, 2009 by jj
	Just saying HI (Preview) I haven't been to MIP for quite a while I thought I'd just say Hi and decide to visit more often. When I first came here my husband was still drinking. This site took me through that trauma and saw me to my first 'real' Alanon meeting. I began working my program in 2004. MIP also saw me through my seperation a...	mon123	2	381	Oct 21, 2009 by mon123
	Introducing Myself (Preview) Hello! I have been married for 21 years. The early years of our marriage were very shakey - with him getting very drunk on a regular basis, losing his license, spending the night in jail. It was hard and always my fault. Don't remember how it happened, but that is when I first discovered Al-Anon. It was my...	Dini	7	513	Oct 21, 2009 by Jerry F
	Cleaning House (Preview) Aloha Family...Walking up Sunday just outside of the reach of the flames and bringing it here one of our membership suggested from her own recovery experiences that I take a 10step look at it. That is usually my practice however the suggestion keyed a deeper 10th step than usual and one of the things t...	Jerry F	3	486	Oct 21, 2009 by glad lee
	since joining al anon (Preview) Hello- I haven't been able to make it to any meetings F2F for a while, but the chemistry was off. It was mostly old women, or people who really grew up with and live in alcoholic families. I didn't feel that I fit in... felt sorta foolish for going to Al Anon for marajuana use and a porn habit. I am not even sur...	woopsadaisy	2	460	Oct 21, 2009 by RunnerChick
	Just need to share (Preview) Hi everyone, I haven't posted to this site in over 6 months, I'm sure. It saved me from a lot of heartache when I needed it most, and I have thought about everyone on here every day, ever since. I mostly stopped posting bc I was healing nicely. The ex and I stopped communicating all together and when we h...	hopeful123	3	569	Oct 21, 2009 by abbyal
	This too shall pass???? Right??? Easy does it........ (Preview) Sorry I haven't been on much lately, I've been lurking though and trying to keep up with everyone. Just haven't felt like I had much good to offer anyone this week. I went to the Dr. Tuesday to find that I again, have some health issues that need to be dealt with, which I am doing, but it through me for a bit o...	shellyj123	8	647	Oct 20, 2009 by Priscilla83
	resentments new and old (Preview) Wow, al non brings me back to the mirror again!! I have been hormonal for a week my thinking goes very negative. What do I do, I should have rang my sponsor but I never, I went with the negativity. It ended by me sending my Sober AB packing. He doesnot drink, he has a job and pays some bills today. I was ups...	Tracy	2	641	Oct 20, 2009 by Jerry F
	How I learned to mind my own business (Preview) I received the following yesterday from my first sponsor and it is still cracking me up so wanted to share it. Enjoy Barb I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, And all the patients were shouting, '13.....13....13.' The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a Little gap in the plank...	Mobirdie	4	648	Oct 20, 2009 by blender_girl
	They don't ever stop lying do they? (Preview) I'm not even with him anymore and still it's all lies, lies and lies. Im tired of it! Even the littlest things are LIES! I asked him a couple months ago why do you have to keep lying? He says why does it matter we aren't together anymore. Yeah that's right but I don't go around asking him questions to catch hi...	Melissa21	9	1049	Oct 20, 2009 by Mandy123
	......and so it always goes this way..... (Preview) So last night I joined here and went to bed exhausted and actually slept on and off today because I haven't truly slept in so long. Gave it to my HP again ya know----felt the weight lifted again after a day of bursting into tears several times when something would remind me of GOOD times with my addict so...	sheila45	2	533	Oct 20, 2009 by sheila45
	WOW!! (Preview) And double Wow!!...What the hell!! Cunning Powerful and Baffling...sometimes just doesn't do the discription any justice. Having lots of time in program doesn't mean I'm cured. So my morning meeting was in full swing and going great. The sharing was right on and we discussing relapse and I fo...	Jerry F	5	631	Oct 19, 2009 by Loupiness
	The 1,000-pound phone. (Preview) Yes, I still have times where that itty bitty cell phone of mine suddenly appears as cumbersome and un-welcoming as a gigantic stone monolith. But I did it again - remembering what my sponsor tells me often... "When you're down or unhappy or angry, you need to do different than what you've been do...	Aloha	3	3798	Oct 19, 2009 by Jerry F
	Guilt (Preview) Have had harsh words this evening with AH. I said it wasn't meant to be like this. After nearly 38 years together I wasn't meant to despise him. Amongst a lot of other things I asked him (not for 1st time) just where is his rock-bottom? It must be very low down indeed. I am so defeated. Everyone else seem...	Tattyhead	9	630	Oct 19, 2009 by richard
	confused (Preview) I have just asked my sober AB to leave he has taken all his stuff and gone to his mumsI am hormonal which has played a part but its more than that, Why did I do this? 1. we both work full time at weekends he watches his son play football then comes home and falls asleep. I am left to do most of the chores (gettin...	Tracy	2	549	Oct 19, 2009 by richard
	my A wife is devastated and I don't know what to do for her; she won't let me in (Preview) Dane, Alanon. I am extremely upset right now. My wife is sucidal right now. She is devastated. Some ppl were mean to her last night at her online AA meeting. It's not at MIP, it's somewhere else. Anway, she was trying to train to lead meetings at this place online and they put her thru what I thought was so m...	Data395	7	556	Oct 19, 2009 by richard
	Celebrating my 18th Birthday with you guys! (Preview) When I joined a 12-step program 19 years ago, it was ACOA, and it was on the suggestion of a friend. I am not the adult child of an alcoholic, but I drug my co-dependant boyfriend there, who was an ACOA. This was the first sign of my dysfunction. That program did help me as it showed me a lot of my codependent...	Overcome	7	1059	Oct 19, 2009 by Peggy7
	my 'feeling' and my son... (Preview) I have gone into detail about my 30 years of age son, who is living with me now. In short, because of severe childhood abuse and torture, untreated closed head injury, he reasoning challenged, self-esteem is in the toilet, still confused about boundaries. He has had major surgery on his foot and his...	richard	3	601	Oct 19, 2009 by Andrea12
	Passing on the dance (Preview) Hi family, It has been a week since my hub moved out. He spent time here this weekend and I know we need to get through this, but I am looking forward to being on the other side of the pain....whenever that is. It is so hard to stay strong and stick with asking him to leave and telling him I want the marriage to b...	Mandy123	5	501	Oct 19, 2009 by Jerry F
	I Love My Drama Goddess (Preview) It has now been two months since Drama Goddess went into the psych ward. I haven't seen her or talked to her since then, get periodic updates from her mom - she has had her ups and downs. I don't know where she stands or the details. I just know I miss her very much. As far as I know, she has never drank alcoh...	barisax	10	992	Oct 19, 2009 by barisax
	Barely hanging on... (Preview) As most of you know, this year has been very hard on me and my family. I never totally understood life itself, in how sometimes things seem like they couldn't possibly get worse.....and then suddenly they take another step deeper into negativity. My uncle just passed away tonight. He was diagnosed on...	stillkickin	9	543	Oct 19, 2009 by Karilynn
	Thank You God for Saving my Daughter (Preview) ((((((((((((Friends)))))))))), Last night I came into the meeting for a very short time to share the pain i was going thru with my daughter.... She was in a terrible car accident....she is doing well today, she has a fractured cheek bone and a terrible laceration over her eye....a plastic surgeon su...	Andrea12	9	3944	Oct 19, 2009 by Karilynn
	its all coming back now. (Preview) Hi posting number two just remembered my sign in info hello everyone again. Refer to post by return that is me. lol	leo	6	492	Oct 19, 2009 by Karilynn
	Willing to get out from under denial and see the truth. (Preview) Hello everyone, thank you for being here, grateful for Al anon. Need a meeting before the meeting. I got back in the ring with my addict this week. I want to say that I have no idea how it happened. Like Mon/Tues I was setting boundaries, and Sat night I am listening to the sound of pill bottles openin...	arags	2	626	Oct 19, 2009 by kitty
	been a while (Preview) It has been a while since I have logged in as I have lost internet connection at my home. I am currently going through a divorce. It truly is the hardest thing I have ever been through in my life even harder than active alcoholism with him. I am having trouble letting go. I feel like my world is falling a...	brightmommy	3	485	Oct 19, 2009 by brightmommy
	The stolen check (Preview) My update is that I still have not received a replacement check. I made no less than ten phone calls on Friday about it. I got absolutely nowhere. I am having to keep turning this over otherwise I start foaming at the mouth with frustration. I did have an epiphany on Friday that this was my life 24/7 when...	maresie	3	591	Oct 18, 2009 by nmike
	New, In Pain, Confused, etc (Preview) Hi, I am new here. I live in the country pretty far from most Alanon meetings. I have been to some but haven't found a place yet where I feel comfortable and can get to on a regular basis. I have a son who is an addict. He just turned 19. In hindsight I think he has been using for several years. He also seems t...	Amom	8	598	Oct 18, 2009 by Amom
	Finding serenity in solitude! (Preview) I am finding serenity in spending time with me. It is so funny because years ago, I couldn't stand being alone. Today I realize that my HP is with me all the time anyway. So...as I sit in my chair. I enjoy reading, doing crossword puzzles & most of all listening to a variety of music on my Walkman CD pl...	Hoot Nanny	2	766	Oct 17, 2009 by hotrod
	Attitude is all about what you choose to do (Preview) Hi all, I last posted that my "A" hub is gone has moved out. Thursday nights is a night I usually a f2f meeting. My hub asked if he could come stay with the kids while I went to the meeting and I said sure. He got to my house before I got off work, with permission. He is depending on other people to tra...	Mandy123	5	642	Oct 17, 2009 by drucilla06
	Your Help is needed (Preview) Hi all, The saturday morning meeting is in much need of member support. And just a quick reminder the weekend morning meetings start at 10am Eastern......7am Pacific. I guess we had some come in at 9am looking for a meeting. It is early for me to chair this meeting...so if you want to see a west coast gal a...	Mandy123	1	526	Oct 17, 2009 by wp
	Validation from the A? (Preview) Just need some feedback here, so I can quit obsessing Why do I care what my exAH and his A g/f (both sober?) think, and thus say, about me? Controlling, narcissistic, a liar... lots of names for me. Funny thing is, they describe me exactly as what I think of them. AH runs everything by her and seeks h...	Loupiness	4	643	Oct 17, 2009 by canadianguy
	just need to rant a bit (Preview) New chapter......today I am picking up my AH from inpt treatment that he has been in since Monday nite. I was just so happy to get him out of the house, I didn't really think about the other side of it. I am not looking forward to bringing him home-- because then I have to deal with him. Out of sight, out of min...	gknee	5	808	Oct 17, 2009 by maresie
	Who'da Thunk? (Preview) I have been talking to my ex A a LOT lately, he is getting ready to move back to this area in a week - we'll see how that goes. He just left a girlfriend who he went to California with and that lasted about two months and she has been sending him nasty messages, etc. He said to me... She needs to do it like you di...	carolinagirl	3	473	Oct 17, 2009 by maresie
	Just sayingt, "HI" (Preview) Thinking of all of you while on vacation here in Newport, Rhode Island. I am having fun in this beautiful place, but all of you are never out of my mind. A is behaving himself. YAY!!! Best wishes to all, Diva	Diva	6	534	Oct 17, 2009 by leo
	i'm back (Preview) Hi everyone this is Leo. It has been so long since I was on here that I forgot all my user information to get in so I am using the name return lol. It is so nice to see you are all still here and I am just going through the old posts. Hope that life has been kind to you and Hp giving you strength and courage to get...	return	0	354	Oct 17, 2009 by return
	BRAVO! (Preview) Bravo to my AH. Today is nine months sober for him! It is the longest he has been sober since he and I have been together. We were talking last night and he said, "I would have had 13 years if I didn't start drinking again when we got together 8 years ago." Hmmmm, what the heck does that mean.....	db55	5	725	Oct 17, 2009 by Mandy123
	Terrible Week & Terribly Weak...... (Preview) My AS is on a binge this week, my nerves are frayed. We live in a small town and he lives too close to our family for us not to be caught up in his drama. He is always at my back door for a hand out, I give him what he needs just to get by on. He will plead and beg until I have no strength left to say no. It is getting t...	DreamsOver	6	605	Oct 17, 2009 by Mandy123
	I actually feel better! (Preview) I feel so much better now that I let go some of my anxieties about my illness. I needed to get all that out so I can move on. Today is a much better day than Tuesday when I posted all that to all of you. It was very scary to open up to you. I am learning to accept myself today. I am much better off doing that. I ev...	Hoot Nanny	4	706	Oct 17, 2009 by Mandy123
	I am not a bad mom. (Preview) I am not perfect, but I am not a bad mom, as AH wants me to believe. I am the one who is with my kids 95% of the time. He is busy coaching during the week and/or going to the gym after work and coming home when he feels like it, and then binge drinking on the weekends, staying out until 5 a.m. and spending the dayli...	SWgal	5	640	Oct 16, 2009 by supermom
	Had to smile... (Preview) I wanted to share part of a conversation that my son and I had. A little background...growing up my son rarely saw his father sober. My A would hit the bar before he came home from work and leave fairly early on weekends to do the same. (now sober almost 4 yrs.) My son is 19, leaving lots of years to build r...	Christy	8	618	Oct 16, 2009 by rtexas
	Okay! I think I get it now... (Preview) Spoke to my sponsor last night. She called right when I received a text from my ex that I was contemplating my response to. We talked about keeping simplicity in and insanity out. We talked of "Easy Does It". "Yep", I said, "I got it". Then we hung up and what did I do...	Loupiness	6	752	Oct 16, 2009 by nmike
	No meetings in your area? Start one! (Preview) One of our Al-Anon family is going to be moving back to the mainland. I am sad, as I will miss her. She's always had such wonderful shares and she has this contagious laughter that I love. One thing I found out about her is that she actually started many of the meetings in my area. Her funny reason for starti...	Aloha	10	841	Oct 16, 2009 by Tattyhead
	Becoming just a participant... (Preview) Aloha family; The day before yesterday I told a sponsee that I would support him by being at his father's funeral. His Dad just died from brain cancer and my sponsee who works this program pretty darn well attended to his part of that event like the recovering member he is. I got there just a little ear...	Jerry F	4	780	Oct 16, 2009 by tea2
	"Let it begin with me" (Preview) I love the reminder..."Let it begin with me" how many times have I wondered... how things could change.. when others would see their true purpose... when others could find their true light.. how healing could help another... if only they would do this or that... until I remember the sayin...	Peggy7	4	834	Oct 16, 2009 by maresie
	my wife (Preview) Hi, Dane here, grateful newcomer in Alanon. :) I've been having a hard time again with my brand new wife. she is in recovery; she's been in it for years, but she still has issues and emotional problems. A relative of hers just passed away and I've been there for her a lot. The other night, I was up with her b...	Data395	8	687	Oct 16, 2009 by Data395
	He's gone (Preview) Hi all, Whelp my hub is gone. Moved out Sunday. I wasn't sure he was really gone, but I found out he is. I was all weird how it happend, but most of this situation has all been weird. He took off Sunday after I told him I wouldn't do something. So he was punishing me by leaving, not knowing where he was, and not c...	Mandy123	10	1070	Oct 16, 2009 by Maria123
	Despondent (Preview) My Ason is off the streets .....back, via a short stint in rehab, in the accommodation he nearly drank himself to death in a few months ago.....it just feels like the circle of hell is complete. I feel so despondent today..... I know Im powerless over his disease..... Im relieved he has a roof over his h...	Ness	4	694	Oct 15, 2009 by Ness
	sobriety (Preview) Hi everyone, I dot know where to start my partner has been sober for nearly 6 months and I am so proud of him. But I am still struggling with the damage this disease has done. I know he is sick, I know he loves me and never wanted to hurt me or anyone else. But today if he so much as does not do his chores all the o...	Tracy	2	745	Oct 15, 2009 by Jerry F
	I feel I need to post (Preview) I thought I would post instead of just reading today when I noticed that there was not one new topic since this morning. That started to make me sad like maybe everyone was starting to lose interest in the site. I sure hope not! My son (the one in 28 day rehab) said to me last night..."Mom, you have to g...	Gailey	6	725	Oct 15, 2009 by Karilynn
	Change Your Thinking (Preview) Saw this, realized how much like the Alanon message we learn each day directs us in this exact same thinking: It will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking.. Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoo...	Peggy7	6	703	Oct 15, 2009 by Lilly Burn
	How do you watch the one you love kill themselves alittle more each day? (Preview) He relapsed! coughing up blood and lung tissue he just laughs and says he is dying! Do i stay and watch him kill himself a little more each day or do i leave in hopes that he will come around? I'm lost... about two weeks ago i found this site and made my first post. thank you all who responded with support and a...	tryingtofindaway2009	13	694	Oct 15, 2009 by Tracy
	It's been 3 months and I'm still angry at him.... (Preview) It's been 3 months since I broke up with my ABF and I find I still have moments where I am angry with him for being such a helpless drunk and ruining our relationship. It just pi*e me off! I wish he (the memories, anger, hurt, etc.) would just go away. I haven't heard from him since I dumped him in his p...	Hawk120025	9	624	Oct 15, 2009 by Tracy
	How Al-Anon Works gave me a great laugh today. (Preview) (I have quoted a paragraph from the book... so I'll understand if this post needs to be removed - just let me know if you had to remove it, mods. Thanks!) It is a very rare occasion when I'm sitting reading a book in quiet solitude and find myself bursting out laughing at something I've read. (Normally I mi...	Aloha	0	412	Oct 14, 2009 by Aloha
	Illusions (Preview) I was thumbing through the C2C meditation book the other day, looking for a topic for a meeting and came across one that "I" had written in the margin that wasn't in the index. I had entitled it "illusions" because that seemed to me to be the focus of the reading on July 26, pg 208 of t...	Overcome	8	1167	Oct 14, 2009 by maresie
	Sponser (Preview) im doing alanon online only as im scared to go to real life meeting but im told your meant to have a sponser to help you go thru the steps properly now i dont have one how do you get one or do you get one when your only doing it online you see i want to do this right	Shellybelly	5	582	Oct 14, 2009 by Baffled
	He is currently sleeping off his vacation from home. (Preview) Hello thank you again for ll your support, I'm looking for face to face meetings in vancouver and definately wanting to go, I took away his car and gave it up so he didn't have such an easy way of leaving in the middle of the night. I told him that he had to start working again. I felt powered by all of your post...	tryingtofindaway2009	5	761	Oct 14, 2009 by Christy
	I am new to this forum-My Story (Preview) My husband is in recovery and has been for a little over two years. He went to rehab a little over two years ago because of his performance at work. He managed to maintain his sobriety 6 months and then he struggled for about a year and a half off and on the wagon. In August I was away on a business trip. He dran...	frustrated	7	608	Oct 14, 2009 by Christy
	What to do with love of A (Preview) I love a man more than life. We have been in relationship for 3 years. I was not aware of the fact he was alcoholic in the first year. We became engaged and i would love to marry him. He says things will get better if I commit. Well, he moved two and a half hours away and because I now realize the extent of his pr...	usedup64	6	629	Oct 14, 2009 by usedup64
	How many times am I going to stick my hand on the hot stove ????? In need of ESH:( (Preview) Well the weekend started out great. Made my F2F Friday and it was amazing.....HP spoke to me again and I left with all the empty spots filling full:) Had my date Sat night and it went well also. This guy is sooo very different...I'm guessing probally because he doesn't have an alcohol or drug addictio...	shellyj123	5	734	Oct 14, 2009 by carolinagirl
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.