Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

THE MEMORIAL SERVICE WENT WELL...MY PHONE RANG DURING THE END--I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD BUT MY HUSBAND FELT HE NEEDED TO CALL! I WAS MAD AT HIM FOR QUITE A WHILE BECAUSE I WAS EMBARASSED & SOME OF IT WAS ON TV! HE WAS AN AFRICAN AMERICAN THAT RECEIVED THE MEDAL OF HONOR FROM THE ARMY IN WWII PLUS OTHER DI...

kablisnow · kablisnow

as i stated in my other post, hes been home two weeks and is already drinking and lyeing on a regular basis. They say in al anon that we dont have to accept unacceptable behavior, Im pretty much at that point. My husband has left me without a vehicle due to wrecking two in a matter of days. He is driving arou...

glad · glad

Does anyone have any special experience with a very difficulity situation, where perhaps the A "down plays" it or says it didn't happen the way you feel it did or says you have "issues" instead of just admitting his part and saying he's sorry? I truely want to forgive but seem to &...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

This seems to be a lifelong problem for me....I always feel that at best I've got one foot in the present and the other foot in some future desire, fantasy, or outcome. In other words lately I spend my days dreaming of being married to someone else, moving to a town I really like(probably couldn't affor...

Maize · Maize

I woke up feeling great. I saw a truck on my way into work that's business logo on the side read "Boundaries" (it was a landscaping truck). I know my HP was telling me to watch my boundaries today and so my ex husband is giving me a hard time. My name is on the mortgage of our condo and he is telli...

movinforward · movinforward

Hello all, I have been in a long term relationship with my partner who is a ACOA. I just reintroduced myself to ACOA literature and was very relieved to read about my ACApartner and her Afamily. We are getting ready to adopt our 2yo son and are really struggling within our relationship due to issues invo...

shadow1 · shadow1

I am very tired and have had a very emotional day so, I hope this post makes sense...... I was having a really down day and thought I would do something nice for someone to try and pick myself up a bit. I had told my soon to be ex A that I had some Grad photos of our son for him. So today was the day I decided to drop...

Desirae · Desirae

I am an adult child of an alcoholic. I am also married to an alcoholic. We have a 7 year old girl. It is difficult to put this kind of situation into simple terms but I will try: My husband is a very happy drunk... until my daughter goes to bed. He is not physically or verbally abusive at all. He just goes to wor...

bgrasp · bgrasp

Hi everyone- I am 28 and recently threw my 30 year old boyfriend (now ex) out on Wednesday because I no longer could handle his actions. He is an alcoholic (sorry for the obvious) and he simply cannot function without it. He began laying out of work and going to his buddy's house to drink rather than worki...

renee26 · renee26

Iv been with my ah for a very long time and he was sober for 10 years. He started drinking again 6 mnths ago. I left after 9 years of dealing with his crap the first time then he quit and because I love him, I came back, thinking he would never drink again. What in the hell was I thinking. We have two teenage kid...

Maize · Maize

I am working on learning to meditate. I can do it when I am in therapy, no problem, my therapist can take me down into a trance state and that is great. I am working on being able to do it on my own. I found a CD that has meditations on it that work on panic attacks (something I suffer with). So I am working on...

LIGHTBULB · LIGHTBULB

My husband is a dry drunk - he used to be such a happy man - now he went thru depression which I didnt know was a sympthom of alcoholism - learning so much here - but I feel he just blames so much on me - gets so angry at me when I questioned it and told me to leave him alone that he is sick of me - Oh boy so much fun here L...

maresie · maresie

Somedays I can manage to get through all the next right things I need to do in order to move my life to another level. I'm discovering the issue isn't the next right thing (which I can of course attend to) the issue is that I really don't want to do that. I want someone else to take responsibility for my lif...

looking_for_peace · looking_for_peace

AH has been off of prescription clonazepam and Effexor for over a month. I have written before to describe his paranoid behaviours. Much of the time, things go reasonably well (although he still doesn't help out around the house even though he is on sick leave). However, I can usually count on somethi...

susie56543 · susie56543

I'm a newbie to the program, I just started going to meetings 3 weeks ago. My boyfriend was in a treatment center this past winter/spring and "planted the seed" that it may be good for me. I'm not exactly sure how to begin here so I'll just jump in..He and I got engaged in February and I found out...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((((((((((Dear Friends)))))))))), Today is 3 years since the death of my soul mate my dear husband Chuck. Tomorrow he would have been 53. I find as the time goes by I don't look so much on the bad anymore and I can see how and why I loved this man so very much. The anger had control of me for a very long time...

rockernapstar · rockernapstar

I am really new to all of this, so please forgive me if I jabber on...where does one start...ok, if there is a God, do you think he/she decides who gets what kind of life? What I mean is, why are some people blessed and others not? If it's original sin then it stands to reason that all women suffer, so I don't b...

youmeandthesethree · youmeandthesethree

Hi there. Last night my husband and I had a long discussion about his soberity, and Al-anon was mentioned in the mists of it. He suggested that I look into finding my own support group. So, here I am. Now what? Will someone please direct me in where to start?

okwitt · okwitt

I am sick. My son has called twice this morning from the recovery house. He was mad and told me to come get him. I told him I couldn't. He wasn't suppose to be able to make phone calls until Monday. He was very mad. Tell me what you think... Please..... When he entered the program this week they told him in f...

myself · myself

Please explain how you can not get crazy in a crazy situation. I mean tonight my A son who is 25 and my AH are both intoxicated and they take turns tearing me down and trying to blame me. I sit here typing to you and trying to tune them out. They want me to drive them to the liquor store and that got an absolutel...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I go to a therapist who is a female, younger than me so there is no "mother figure" involved here. What I found was that, aside from my mother (who despite her faults has been pretty loving and accepting of me my whole life), my therapist is the closest female in my life. And certainly I share...

tlcate · tlcate

Posting the night before so you see it first thing in the morning!!! You are such a wonderful person, have been there for so many here at MIP, and your recovery is rock solid. Thank you so much for being a part of this family. You inspire me. I hope you have a wonderful day. Tricia

disneygirl71 · disneygirl71

Yesterday was definitely not a happy day at our house.My AH of 17 years went on a binge and came home to spread his mood around.I normally would pack the kids up and take off.I don't like to hang around and argue...because I can't get a point across to the drunk guy. Anyway...the van wouldn't start due to a...

buick23 · buick23

They are such liars. He tried to cover up for himself by getting mad at me and making assumptions. I was minding my own business. Such a liar. Enough Seriously Guess it's a duck. Had to get this out before I go on with my day. buick

neshema2 · neshema2

Hello everyone! I have been away for a while (not recovery, but the board) and I just wanted to share about my dry drunk sister Growing up in an alcoholic family and marrying problem drinkers, and also becoming problem drinkers ourselves- I do believe that mine was symptomatic of my pain- Possibly her...

Ash · Ash

I feel trapped. I thought I had a good morning. went running, prayed and meditated. then thought I set a boundary. it backfired and he again threatens the end of the relationship. this is so messed up. I am told that I shouldn't talk to him. that he hasn't got recovery and will take everything as a threat....

Jerry F · Jerry F

Please take none of this seriously cause it is light fare with a smidgen of the disease sprinkled around it. It was emailed to me by a cousin I use to partake in the disease with. I feel glad to have been throughly cracked up this joke without taking any one little piece of it seriously unlike before when...

Maize · Maize

My friend in recovery is coming home in 2 weeks. The codependent person in me is worried about how he will do when he does get back. The person in me that is changing and working on things through my learnings in Alanon is saying "live for today, you can do this, don't worry about when he gets here a...

Ness · Ness

Hi All.....Im on a right downer at the mo and not much good to man nor beast.... A damn big black cloud is surrounding me and isnt shifting. It was my birthday yesterday...yay.... and for the 1st time in 3 yrs I got a lovely card from Ason....who is currently two weeks into a 16 week rehab, ..... but I just f...

never going back · never going back

Hi ((((friends))))!! It seems I live my life with songs constantly playing in my head (usually James Taylor-love that man!!!). Maybe because I almost always have the radio or CD playing? Anyway, it occurred to me that the messages from songs are a very powerful influence in my life and always had been...

Gailey · Gailey

My son finally moved out with his girlfriend. After about 2 weeks at her house he announces that they are getting married. WTH!!!!! I truly do not believe it is love but more convenience. I know I must stay out of his business. They are having a small wedding. I have been told to just embrace their decis...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I was washing my supper dishes when the doorbell rang. He was standing at my back door, I went out to talk to him and of course I alreading knew what he was going to say before he even said it. He blamed everyone for his drug problem, his school mates taunting him, he wasn't taught about the real world by us...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I AM VERY HAPPY TO REPORT THAT I AM ATTENDING A MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR A FORMER HIGHLY-DECORATED WWII VETERAN. IT WILL BE A VERY HUGE CELEBRATION OF LIFE IN MY HOMETOWN TOMORROW. I FEEL HONORED TO ATTEND THIS. HE GOT THE CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR FROM A FORMER PRESIDENT IN THE 90'S & I JUST WANTED T...

Maize · Maize

Hi there, I am Maize. I am 35 and new to all of this. I have spent a year and a half in intense therapy, with 5 days in the hospital for feeling suicidal. I was trapped in an awful and abusive marriage. I felt alone and didn't want to go on. On to bigger and brighter things, and I am divorced and free now! I...

Aloha · Aloha

Yesterday I finally got to the court and filed for divorce. It's the beginning of the paperwork, but it was a step I finally needed to get under way. I took the day off to make sure I got down to the courthouse instead of trying to squeeze in an extra hour or two off from work. I called AH and let him know and tol...

Jerry F · Jerry F

how the arrival and presence of a child can calm rough waters and chronic negativity. Avery Leipua (flower lei) arrived at 3:20PM, 11 days early and a little light at 6lbs 11ozs and angel pink. She caused the whole family to focus for a while and smile for no other reason than she was calming. Grandso...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I've been venting alot of negative stuff lately and I thank all of you for your patience with me. I feel I have legitimate reasons to be unhappy and despite things I can do to "distract myself" (because that's all they really are, there's nothing that's truly going to bring lasting happine...

okwitt · okwitt

My A adult son got into the recovery house for 30 intense training days. I want to be hopeful..but reading on here seems they usually start back drinking. I have felt such a weight lifted off me while he is there. I could really get used to this...then reality sets in with him back with no job and on and on an...

Maize · Maize

I didn't sleep well last night. I had to fight my depression this morning alone, as when I was feeling it, I didn't feel I could call anyone that early in the morning. I fought through and I am working on staying positive now. I know that for me, when I don't sleep well, my depression and panic attacks ha...

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

Went to an open AA/Alanon meeting tonight. We had a video on the 12 step program. After the video, was open discussion. It just made me think to myself how grateful I was to be in attendance there and to be able to come here and share/read/vent/respond to different posts. So, I just wanted to tell you a...

tlcate · tlcate

I am in the process of trying to buy my first house. I am doing it 100% on my own with nothing but a lot of advice from others . Fear can be so destructive!!! My fear translates to procrastination. Do something other than what you are afraid of and deal with it when it gets here. Go have fun, bury myself in w...

Jozie · Jozie

Hey Guys... Wow... I Just went & Looked at my last Post and somehow it has been a MONTH since you have last heard from me ;( Just wanted to let all know that I am Doing OK... The Trip to meet my New Found Friend was Wonderful, I only got to see her for about 5 hours, because they had to work the next morning, ...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

(((((Friends))))), Ok, today is another day.....have taken my son's car from him..he is 18 and what else can I do...I can only do this because it is in my name and I know his car means everything to him.... Now I don't know what this will accomplish or even if it will accomplish anything however it's wort...

Cosmos · Cosmos

Hi all. I am currently finding this program very hard. I know that it is the only way and that I need to keep working it, but its getting harder. I think Im experiencing some sort of a withdrawal from my alcoholic ex-girlfriend. I havent heard from her in a month. She was doing her step work in AA and was ad...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Had a little a ha moment this morning and want to share it. I was doing some talking with my HP. I was asking my hp to help me love him as I was having a bit of an acceptance problem. An acceptance problem I have practiced over and over again. The answer Why don't you trust I love you. Oh my goodness, I want t...

Jerry F · Jerry F

"As We Understood" a great piece of CAL literature thats been around since the 80ies and came out of the Quebec International? Wednesday Night Turning Point (our home group) did the meeting from it on prayer and meditation. I don't think a meeting could have been better that what we had....

miss_carol · miss_carol

Today I am wondering why I didn't leave the first time he used any mind altering substance, but I didn't. ( Because I hoped it was just once). So here I am, I married him 3 years ago and now I only get a glimpse of who sober hubby is. Somedays I can remember he is sick, others I wonder why I would pick a "los...

Katy · Katy

Jerry you floor me, lol, I was an avid alcoholic pet collector, pet defect owner was me, my friend pointed this out not so long backlol, Why she said do you always go for the sickly ones, why not choose the happy healthy ones with smiley faces and waggly tails? Well I always felt sorry for the sickly ones,...

ziggymiller · ziggymiller

I am new to Alanon. I tried going to meetings before and things kinda got better and I stopped going, plus three young kids and full time job made it difficult. I know I need to get back to being me! Things have recently, built up and are about to come crashing down. I can know longer trust my AH to take car...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

I wish I could be constant positivity.......I wish I could be a jolly little trooper all the time......and I wish I had it together.......... Ok, So about two hours ago my cell phone fell in a university public toilet as I swung my purse around in the stall...........And for this insignificant litt...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

Last night my AH came home drunk BUT with a cellphone I've been telling him I want. I took it, told him thanks and did not speak to him for the rest of the night cause I only had mean things to say to him. He of course was acting like an idiot and even had the nerve to tell me that I was ungrateful for not gushing ov...

myself · myself

Thank you for your support and advice. I dont know what I will do but I pray for the strength to do as I need for myself and the children I am raising. I hear that I'm not responsible for my son being an alcoholic but I find that hard to swallow as in the literature I have read I know that environment can help con...

kablisnow · kablisnow

For six weeks I supported him and brought the kids every weekend to visit and now hes home and already drinking and lyeing. He went to treatment on his own b/c he said he finally realized what his life had become. I havent gotten mad or yelled, Ive been sympathetic and let him know I was here if he needed to t...

Bella333 · Bella333

I am hurting a lot right now. On July 1st my exAbf told me he is seeing someone. We have been broken up for 3 years but have remained best friends and neither of us has seen anyone seriously. We have hung out once in the past three weeks. I told him I needed to be distant to have time to adjust to this new turn of e...

tlcate · tlcate

Please come share your ES&H -- Edited by tlcate on Wednesday 28th of July 2010 05:29:07 PM

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

I finally separated from my husband. I've come to the conclusion where I'm OK with a divorce. He does not want to. In the past I asked him so many times for couples counseling which he often would avoid and not make time for.....The children are OK, yet I understand change is difficult for them as well and...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello Everyone! Its been such a long time since I've visited here. I've learned so many tools of the trade from all of you. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Just wanted to let everyone know that I am now a believer that life with an A is possible. It takes work everyday, but it is possible. It's no...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

I've been told many times, as I've lamented about the lack of love in my life, that I had to learn to love myself. I have to admit to being skeptical about this. Can I do it, yes, have I loved myself in the past, absolutely. Now? Maybe not as much, but I dont' loathe myself. But it has never felt like enoug...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

My wife is for the most part a non drinking, alcoholic behaving person who creates tension, unease, financial hardship and insecurity in our household. Bad enough it gets to me but I worry about my daughter as well. I realize this isn't new to anyone else here, but I am so resentful and bitter toward he...

mjhyankees · mjhyankees

Funny my first time through alanon, about 10 years ago (was involved for 5 years or so), my higher power felt real, was a source of comfort and I believed in him. This time, I'm not feeling it. I feel abandoned by my HP, or that he's ineffectual. It's such a part of recovery that I dont' know how to move on w...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	update... (Preview) THE MEMORIAL SERVICE WENT WELL...MY PHONE RANG DURING THE END--I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD BUT MY HUSBAND FELT HE NEEDED TO CALL! I WAS MAD AT HIM FOR QUITE A WHILE BECAUSE I WAS EMBARASSED & SOME OF IT WAS ON TV! HE WAS AN AFRICAN AMERICAN THAT RECEIVED THE MEDAL OF HONOR FROM THE ARMY IN WWII PLUS OTHER DI...	Hoot Nanny	2	678	Aug 2, 2010 by Rocky38
	here we go again (Preview) as i stated in my other post, hes been home two weeks and is already drinking and lyeing on a regular basis. They say in al anon that we dont have to accept unacceptable behavior, Im pretty much at that point. My husband has left me without a vehicle due to wrecking two in a matter of days. He is driving arou...	kablisnow	5	726	Aug 2, 2010 by tlcate
	To forgive is devine (Preview) Does anyone have any special experience with a very difficulity situation, where perhaps the A "down plays" it or says it didn't happen the way you feel it did or says you have "issues" instead of just admitting his part and saying he's sorry? I truely want to forgive but seem to &...	glad	9	636	Aug 2, 2010 by tlcate
	need help living in the present (Preview) This seems to be a lifelong problem for me....I always feel that at best I've got one foot in the present and the other foot in some future desire, fantasy, or outcome. In other words lately I spend my days dreaming of being married to someone else, moving to a town I really like(probably couldn't affor...	mjhyankees	5	1035	Aug 2, 2010 by tlcate
	hard day (Preview) I woke up feeling great. I saw a truck on my way into work that's business logo on the side read "Boundaries" (it was a landscaping truck). I know my HP was telling me to watch my boundaries today and so my ex husband is giving me a hard time. My name is on the mortgage of our condo and he is telli...	Maize	4	696	Aug 2, 2010 by Maize
	My first post (Preview) Hello all, I have been in a long term relationship with my partner who is a ACOA. I just reintroduced myself to ACOA literature and was very relieved to read about my ACApartner and her Afamily. We are getting ready to adopt our 2yo son and are really struggling within our relationship due to issues invo...	movinforward	4	737	Aug 2, 2010 by movinforward
	I hate this disease!! (Preview) I am very tired and have had a very emotional day so, I hope this post makes sense...... I was having a really down day and thought I would do something nice for someone to try and pick myself up a bit. I had told my soon to be ex A that I had some Grad photos of our son for him. So today was the day I decided to drop...	shadow1	12	888	Aug 2, 2010 by All I can be
	How do I explain alcoholism to a 7 year old? Al-anon ACOA (Preview) I am an adult child of an alcoholic. I am also married to an alcoholic. We have a 7 year old girl. It is difficult to put this kind of situation into simple terms but I will try: My husband is a very happy drunk... until my daughter goes to bed. He is not physically or verbally abusive at all. He just goes to wor...	Desirae	8	11671	Aug 2, 2010 by Rose
	New here and need help (Preview) Hi everyone- I am 28 and recently threw my 30 year old boyfriend (now ex) out on Wednesday because I no longer could handle his actions. He is an alcoholic (sorry for the obvious) and he simply cannot function without it. He began laying out of work and going to his buddy's house to drink rather than worki...	bgrasp	5	746	Aug 2, 2010 by xeno59
	Someone please tell me how to do this.. (Preview) Iv been with my ah for a very long time and he was sober for 10 years. He started drinking again 6 mnths ago. I left after 9 years of dealing with his crap the first time then he quit and because I love him, I came back, thinking he would never drink again. What in the hell was I thinking. We have two teenage kid...	renee26	7	1163	Aug 2, 2010 by Sweet Stanley
	Changing the things I can... (Preview) I am working on learning to meditate. I can do it when I am in therapy, no problem, my therapist can take me down into a trance state and that is great. I am working on being able to do it on my own. I found a CD that has meditations on it that work on panic attacks (something I suffer with). So I am working on...	Maize	6	786	Aug 2, 2010 by maire rua
	DRY DRUNK!!!! HELP (Preview) My husband is a dry drunk - he used to be such a happy man - now he went thru depression which I didnt know was a sympthom of alcoholism - learning so much here - but I feel he just blames so much on me - gets so angry at me when I questioned it and told me to leave him alone that he is sick of me - Oh boy so much fun here L...	LIGHTBULB	9	1987	Aug 1, 2010 by LIGHTBULB
	the next right thing (Preview) Somedays I can manage to get through all the next right things I need to do in order to move my life to another level. I'm discovering the issue isn't the next right thing (which I can of course attend to) the issue is that I really don't want to do that. I want someone else to take responsibility for my lif...	maresie	7	1282	Aug 1, 2010 by Maize
	Should I do what he asks? (Preview) AH has been off of prescription clonazepam and Effexor for over a month. I have written before to describe his paranoid behaviours. Much of the time, things go reasonably well (although he still doesn't help out around the house even though he is on sick leave). However, I can usually count on somethi...	looking_for_peace	11	879	Aug 1, 2010 by maresie
	Fear, Loneliness and Confusion... (Preview) I'm a newbie to the program, I just started going to meetings 3 weeks ago. My boyfriend was in a treatment center this past winter/spring and "planted the seed" that it may be good for me. I'm not exactly sure how to begin here so I'll just jump in..He and I got engaged in February and I found out...	susie56543	7	925	Jul 31, 2010 by susie56543
	3 Years Today Since I lost my Husband and Children lost thier Father (Preview) ((((((((((((Dear Friends)))))))))), Today is 3 years since the death of my soul mate my dear husband Chuck. Tomorrow he would have been 53. I find as the time goes by I don't look so much on the bad anymore and I can see how and why I loved this man so very much. The anger had control of me for a very long time...	Andrea12	11	1088	Jul 31, 2010 by RLC
	Questions (Preview) I am really new to all of this, so please forgive me if I jabber on...where does one start...ok, if there is a God, do you think he/she decides who gets what kind of life? What I mean is, why are some people blessed and others not? If it's original sin then it stands to reason that all women suffer, so I don't b...	rockernapstar	7	785	Jul 31, 2010 by maresie
	Looking for direction. (Preview) Hi there. Last night my husband and I had a long discussion about his soberity, and Al-anon was mentioned in the mists of it. He suggested that I look into finding my own support group. So, here I am. Now what? Will someone please direct me in where to start?	youmeandthesethree	8	665	Jul 31, 2010 by ythannah
	Need to talk (Preview) I am sick. My son has called twice this morning from the recovery house. He was mad and told me to come get him. I told him I couldn't. He wasn't suppose to be able to make phone calls until Monday. He was very mad. Tell me what you think... Please..... When he entered the program this week they told him in f...	okwitt	12	666	Jul 31, 2010 by Jennifer
	PLEASE EXPLAIN HOW TO ME (Preview) Please explain how you can not get crazy in a crazy situation. I mean tonight my A son who is 25 and my AH are both intoxicated and they take turns tearing me down and trying to blame me. I sit here typing to you and trying to tune them out. They want me to drive them to the liquor store and that got an absolutel...	myself	7	892	Jul 31, 2010 by hotrod
	Anyone else find this strange or sad??? (Preview) I go to a therapist who is a female, younger than me so there is no "mother figure" involved here. What I found was that, aside from my mother (who despite her faults has been pretty loving and accepting of me my whole life), my therapist is the closest female in my life. And certainly I share...	mjhyankees	10	935	Jul 31, 2010 by mjhyankees
	Happy Birthday Hotrod!!!!! (Tomorrow) (Preview) Posting the night before so you see it first thing in the morning!!! You are such a wonderful person, have been there for so many here at MIP, and your recovery is rock solid. Thank you so much for being a part of this family. You inspire me. I hope you have a wonderful day. Tricia	tlcate	12	714	Jul 31, 2010 by hotrod
	New to al anon...but not new to living with an alcoholic. (Preview) Yesterday was definitely not a happy day at our house.My AH of 17 years went on a binge and came home to spread his mood around.I normally would pack the kids up and take off.I don't like to hang around and argue...because I can't get a point across to the drunk guy. Anyway...the van wouldn't start due to a...	disneygirl71	13	1236	Jul 31, 2010 by disneygirl71
	liars (Preview) They are such liars. He tried to cover up for himself by getting mad at me and making assumptions. I was minding my own business. Such a liar. Enough Seriously Guess it's a duck. Had to get this out before I go on with my day. buick	buick23	6	851	Jul 31, 2010 by Dyinginside
	I don't know what is worse---Dry or wet drunks (Preview) Hello everyone! I have been away for a while (not recovery, but the board) and I just wanted to share about my dry drunk sister Growing up in an alcoholic family and marrying problem drinkers, and also becoming problem drinkers ourselves- I do believe that mine was symptomatic of my pain- Possibly her...	neshema2	10	1357	Jul 31, 2010 by Dyinginside
	Help - what do you do with the pain? (Preview) I feel trapped. I thought I had a good morning. went running, prayed and meditated. then thought I set a boundary. it backfired and he again threatens the end of the relationship. this is so messed up. I am told that I shouldn't talk to him. that he hasn't got recovery and will take everything as a threat....	Ash	7	724	Jul 31, 2010 by Dyinginside
	Sharing a JOKE.... (Preview) Please take none of this seriously cause it is light fare with a smidgen of the disease sprinkled around it. It was emailed to me by a cousin I use to partake in the disease with. I feel glad to have been throughly cracked up this joke without taking any one little piece of it seriously unlike before when...	Jerry F	8	779	Jul 31, 2010 by lyndebi
	Working hard on EVERYTHING (Preview) My friend in recovery is coming home in 2 weeks. The codependent person in me is worried about how he will do when he does get back. The person in me that is changing and working on things through my learnings in Alanon is saying "live for today, you can do this, don't worry about when he gets here a...	Maize	4	619	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	Severe kick up the butt needed......thanks in advance! (Preview) Hi All.....Im on a right downer at the mo and not much good to man nor beast.... A damn big black cloud is surrounding me and isnt shifting. It was my birthday yesterday...yay.... and for the 1st time in 3 yrs I got a lovely card from Ason....who is currently two weeks into a 16 week rehab, ..... but I just f...	Ness	13	1448	Jul 30, 2010 by Jennifer
	Changed for good (Preview) Hi ((((friends))))!! It seems I live my life with songs constantly playing in my head (usually James Taylor-love that man!!!). Maybe because I almost always have the radio or CD playing? Anyway, it occurred to me that the messages from songs are a very powerful influence in my life and always had been...	never going back	4	805	Jul 30, 2010 by abbyal
	so...he moved out and now he is getting married!!!!! (Preview) My son finally moved out with his girlfriend. After about 2 weeks at her house he announces that they are getting married. WTH!!!!! I truly do not believe it is love but more convenience. I know I must stay out of his business. They are having a small wedding. I have been told to just embrace their decis...	Gailey	8	841	Jul 30, 2010 by Ness
	I Saw My AS Today.... (Preview) I was washing my supper dishes when the doorbell rang. He was standing at my back door, I went out to talk to him and of course I alreading knew what he was going to say before he even said it. He blamed everyone for his drug problem, his school mates taunting him, he wasn't taught about the real world by us...	DreamsOver	7	884	Jul 30, 2010 by Ness
	PATRIOTISM (Preview) I AM VERY HAPPY TO REPORT THAT I AM ATTENDING A MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR A FORMER HIGHLY-DECORATED WWII VETERAN. IT WILL BE A VERY HUGE CELEBRATION OF LIFE IN MY HOMETOWN TOMORROW. I FEEL HONORED TO ATTEND THIS. HE GOT THE CONGRESSIONAL MEDAL OF HONOR FROM A FORMER PRESIDENT IN THE 90'S & I JUST WANTED T...	Hoot Nanny	3	656	Jul 30, 2010 by Jerry F
	Brand new to this... (Preview) Hi there, I am Maize. I am 35 and new to all of this. I have spent a year and a half in intense therapy, with 5 days in the hospital for feeling suicidal. I was trapped in an awful and abusive marriage. I felt alone and didn't want to go on. On to bigger and brighter things, and I am divorced and free now! I...	Maize	16	875	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	Really amazing the powerful emotions I have where ex-AH is concerned. (Preview) Yesterday I finally got to the court and filed for divorce. It's the beginning of the paperwork, but it was a step I finally needed to get under way. I took the day off to make sure I got down to the courthouse instead of trying to squeeze in an extra hour or two off from work. I called AH and let him know and tol...	Aloha	2	683	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	It's Amazing (Preview) how the arrival and presence of a child can calm rough waters and chronic negativity. Avery Leipua (flower lei) arrived at 3:20PM, 11 days early and a little light at 6lbs 11ozs and angel pink. She caused the whole family to focus for a while and smile for no other reason than she was calming. Grandso...	Jerry F	16	1011	Jul 30, 2010 by Ness
	Ok...gratitude time..... (Preview) I've been venting alot of negative stuff lately and I thank all of you for your patience with me. I feel I have legitimate reasons to be unhappy and despite things I can do to "distract myself" (because that's all they really are, there's nothing that's truly going to bring lasting happine...	mjhyankees	4	752	Jul 30, 2010 by xeno59
	What else? It's my son. (Preview) My A adult son got into the recovery house for 30 intense training days. I want to be hopeful..but reading on here seems they usually start back drinking. I have felt such a weight lifted off me while he is there. I could really get used to this...then reality sets in with him back with no job and on and on an...	okwitt	4	737	Jul 30, 2010 by xeno59
	Staying positive? (Preview) I didn't sleep well last night. I had to fight my depression this morning alone, as when I was feeling it, I didn't feel I could call anyone that early in the morning. I fought through and I am working on staying positive now. I know that for me, when I don't sleep well, my depression and panic attacks ha...	Maize	8	816	Jul 30, 2010 by Maize
	So Grateful (Preview) Went to an open AA/Alanon meeting tonight. We had a video on the 12 step program. After the video, was open discussion. It just made me think to myself how grateful I was to be in attendance there and to be able to come here and share/read/vent/respond to different posts. So, I just wanted to tell you a...	Sweet Stanley	5	542	Jul 30, 2010 by never going back
	Fear (Preview) I am in the process of trying to buy my first house. I am doing it 100% on my own with nothing but a lot of advice from others . Fear can be so destructive!!! My fear translates to procrastination. Do something other than what you are afraid of and deal with it when it gets here. Go have fun, bury myself in w...	tlcate	6	818	Jul 30, 2010 by Karilynn
	Found my way back... :) (Preview) Hey Guys... Wow... I Just went & Looked at my last Post and somehow it has been a MONTH since you have last heard from me ;( Just wanted to let all know that I am Doing OK... The Trip to meet my New Found Friend was Wonderful, I only got to see her for about 5 hours, because they had to work the next morning, ...	Jozie	6	814	Jul 30, 2010 by Karilynn
	Trying to Get Thru to my Son (Preview) (((((Friends))))), Ok, today is another day.....have taken my son's car from him..he is 18 and what else can I do...I can only do this because it is in my name and I know his car means everything to him.... Now I don't know what this will accomplish or even if it will accomplish anything however it's wort...	Andrea12	6	784	Jul 30, 2010 by Karilynn
	I fear I'm loosing it. This is getting worse day by day... (Preview) Hi all. I am currently finding this program very hard. I know that it is the only way and that I need to keep working it, but its getting harder. I think Im experiencing some sort of a withdrawal from my alcoholic ex-girlfriend. I havent heard from her in a month. She was doing her step work in AA and was ad...	Cosmos	7	1248	Jul 30, 2010 by Cosmos
	What a thought (Preview) Had a little a ha moment this morning and want to share it. I was doing some talking with my HP. I was asking my hp to help me love him as I was having a bit of an acceptance problem. An acceptance problem I have practiced over and over again. The answer Why don't you trust I love you. Oh my goodness, I want t...	fishinmama	4	848	Jul 29, 2010 by Rocky38
	Anyone else reading and using (Preview) "As We Understood" a great piece of CAL literature thats been around since the 80ies and came out of the Quebec International? Wednesday Night Turning Point (our home group) did the meeting from it on prayer and meditation. I don't think a meeting could have been better that what we had....	Jerry F	6	863	Jul 29, 2010 by Aloha
	Trying not to be mad at myself (Preview) Today I am wondering why I didn't leave the first time he used any mind altering substance, but I didn't. ( Because I hoped it was just once). So here I am, I married him 3 years ago and now I only get a glimpse of who sober hubby is. Somedays I can remember he is sick, others I wonder why I would pick a "los...	miss_carol	4	901	Jul 29, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Alcoholic pets! (Preview) Jerry you floor me, lol, I was an avid alcoholic pet collector, pet defect owner was me, my friend pointed this out not so long backlol, Why she said do you always go for the sickly ones, why not choose the happy healthy ones with smiley faces and waggly tails? Well I always felt sorry for the sickly ones,...	Katy	2	783	Jul 29, 2010 by Jozie
	Today...I am takin control over my life. (Preview) I am new to Alanon. I tried going to meetings before and things kinda got better and I stopped going, plus three young kids and full time job made it difficult. I know I need to get back to being me! Things have recently, built up and are about to come crashing down. I can know longer trust my AH to take car...	ziggymiller	4	864	Jul 29, 2010 by Maize
	Control & Higher Power (Preview) I wish I could be constant positivity.......I wish I could be a jolly little trooper all the time......and I wish I had it together.......... Ok, So about two hours ago my cell phone fell in a university public toilet as I swung my purse around in the stall...........And for this insignificant litt...	RoseODAT	4	850	Jul 29, 2010 by Maize
	Presents and booze (Preview) Last night my AH came home drunk BUT with a cellphone I've been telling him I want. I took it, told him thanks and did not speak to him for the rest of the night cause I only had mean things to say to him. He of course was acting like an idiot and even had the nerve to tell me that I was ungrateful for not gushing ov...	Priscilla83	2	733	Jul 29, 2010 by never going back
	I do hold part of the blame for who he has become today....I am his mother!!!! (Preview) Thank you for your support and advice. I dont know what I will do but I pray for the strength to do as I need for myself and the children I am raising. I hear that I'm not responsible for my son being an alcoholic but I find that hard to swallow as in the literature I have read I know that environment can help con...	myself	10	889	Jul 28, 2010 by fob888
	home a week from rehab and already drank twice.... (Preview) For six weeks I supported him and brought the kids every weekend to visit and now hes home and already drinking and lyeing. He went to treatment on his own b/c he said he finally realized what his life had become. I havent gotten mad or yelled, Ive been sympathetic and let him know I was here if he needed to t...	kablisnow	8	1074	Jul 28, 2010 by abbyal
	struggling to survive my exAbf moving on (Preview) I am hurting a lot right now. On July 1st my exAbf told me he is seeing someone. We have been broken up for 3 years but have remained best friends and neither of us has seen anyone seriously. We have hung out once in the past three weeks. I told him I needed to be distant to have time to adjust to this new turn of e...	Bella333	4	863	Jul 28, 2010 by Bella333
	Step 5 is up on the step work board (Preview) Please come share your ES&H -- Edited by tlcate on Wednesday 28th of July 2010 05:29:07 PM	tlcate	0	567	Jul 28, 2010 by tlcate
	Patience..... asking for patience (Preview) I finally separated from my husband. I've come to the conclusion where I'm OK with a divorce. He does not want to. In the past I asked him so many times for couples counseling which he often would avoid and not make time for.....The children are OK, yet I understand change is difficult for them as well and...	RoseODAT	6	1270	Jul 28, 2010 by kitty
	It's not always easy, but for me it's worth it! (Preview) Hello Everyone! Its been such a long time since I've visited here. I've learned so many tools of the trade from all of you. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Just wanted to let everyone know that I am now a believer that life with an A is possible. It takes work everyday, but it is possible. It's no...	Sincerely	4	711	Jul 28, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Love myself???? Is that enough?????? (Preview) I've been told many times, as I've lamented about the lack of love in my life, that I had to learn to love myself. I have to admit to being skeptical about this. Can I do it, yes, have I loved myself in the past, absolutely. Now? Maybe not as much, but I dont' loathe myself. But it has never felt like enoug...	mjhyankees	8	1173	Jul 28, 2010 by ythannah
	struggling with resentment.... (Preview) My wife is for the most part a non drinking, alcoholic behaving person who creates tension, unease, financial hardship and insecurity in our household. Bad enough it gets to me but I worry about my daughter as well. I realize this isn't new to anyone else here, but I am so resentful and bitter toward he...	mjhyankees	3	1377	Jul 28, 2010 by kitty
	No higher power..... (Preview) Funny my first time through alanon, about 10 years ago (was involved for 5 years or so), my higher power felt real, was a source of comfort and I believed in him. This time, I'm not feeling it. I feel abandoned by my HP, or that he's ineffectual. It's such a part of recovery that I dont' know how to move on w...	mjhyankees	12	1032	Jul 28, 2010 by kitty
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.