Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jerry F · Jerry F

What they're feeling is fear. That awareness came from a long program journey plus working as a counselor in a large Rehab Hospital and working with Alternatives to Violence men. Lying or avoiding the truth comes from the fear of being found out and/or wanting to take the pressure off by not measuri...

youfoundme · youfoundme

Today I had a quiet day at work and I felt ok. My fiance drank last night, and when I picked him up from work, I knew it. It was 11pm. I didn't react. I kept remembering what I have learned here and am learning from my sponsor... I remained calm. We came home and went to bed. He wasn't terribly drunk, no...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

Just wondering ... I have a program friend that I love and respect. However, I have overheard her gossiping with other program friends from time to time. I feel uncomfortable about this. I've never participated in the gossip, and I'm not really sure what to do - if anything. My sponsor says that if...

MDK · MDK

Well last week my husband didn't show up for work on time and got suspended from work for 3 days. This is not the first time and if history repeats itself it will not be the last. Instead of worrying or getting mad I just kept my mouth shut and said I hate that for you maybe you need a little break. Well as it tur...

a_c_s · a_c_s

Hi, I am the husband of an alcoholic. My wife has struggled and been in and out of rehabs for the past several years. We have 4 young children at home, and her struggles have taken a toll on all of us. She just got back from a 2 month stay at her sister's out of town (her sister is in AA and it was a place where my wi...

Doozy · Doozy

Well, I am having a really good opportunity to practice all my alanon lessons. Tonight, I have asked my roommate to move out. We are friends, and that has made it especially hard for me. As I have started to seriously work through my recovery from these issues of alcoholism, addiction, and dysfunction...

youfoundme · youfoundme

I am a pretty healthy person, generally. Nothing is usually physiologically wrong with me, I have some mental things like PTSD (anxiety, panic attacks, depression) and I have worked on that a lot. Now I found out that what the doctor thought was carpal tunnel is actually arthritis of the wrists and...

kandikween · kandikween

Hi my name is Liz, i'm eighteen and i've been living with an alcoholic all of my life. I used to be be very angry with him, he would fly off the handle for no reason, pit my mom against me, say mean things. We would always go back and forth. As I got older, he started grounding me for innapropriate things, on ho...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

Hi I have read and read and read. In fact if my boss knew how much I have sat on here and read, I would be sacked... that would give me more time to read though hey. Healthy detachment.. some of things I have read have given me cause to question my belief of what this may look like. I was self taught to walk away...

Jerry F · Jerry F

now have another urn with my ashes in it. I asked the question what are you feeling? and should not have. Had a fleeting opportunity to remember the past and to grab a hold of detachement and didn't. I did the samething again that I did in the past and got the same outcome. Does an asprin cure insanity...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Blast from the past, I've slipped so many times in my recovery. I've read some of my past posts and I see how much of my own roller coaster of recovery has been. I need to get help. I wanna be that girl I was in some of my old posts. I'm at square 1 again.

Lyne · Lyne

Well nothing stays the same, thank God! I have come to the message board almost everday for a month or two. I have not have time to read or go to a F2F meeting. Listening to all of you and trying to respond and write my own share, has really helped. I am feeling calmer, less flat, and more positive. My As...

youfoundme · youfoundme

-- Edited by youfoundme on Thursday 11th of August 2011 02:57:01 PM -- Edited by youfoundme on Thursday 11th of August 2011 09:22:59 PM

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Hi Those who know me on these boards know I have been married to AH for 39 years (+7 months). He has been alcohol dependant for last 6 or so years and his health has been seriously declining for the last 2 years. He is now in hospital for the last time. His liver has all but ceased functioning and his lungs are...

Pushka · Pushka

for a very important date .. lol .. I feel like the white rabbit from Alice and Wonderland!! Have a wonderful night all, Hugs P :)

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

Hi I feel a bit like I am writing a novel here but I just had to tell you guys about yesterday. If you have been following my posts (which I know some have) you may remember that I was feeling anxious about not checking up on him, and I sat and talked to the 'dope drawer'. In the afternoon, I was actually scare...

NovSun · NovSun

My books are on order, Courage to Change, One Day at a Time and Getting them Sober. They are due to arrive next Monday. My 2nd ever meeting is tonight and I am looking forward to it. The Afiance and I had a pretty good week. I am not sure if he actually drank on Monday or really went to dinner and the AA meet...

NovSun · NovSun

Just a ball of emotions today. I feel like I can't win. I feel stupid for looking the other way when my Afiance is right there in front of me, acting intoxicated. Like I am just oblivious to what is going on in my life, in MY house. Then, I get angry and feel like I have to prove I am right by checking phone re...

John · John

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Anne01 · Anne01

Hello, can someone tell me what those little tag and thread things are on my posts and how do I get rid of them? Thank you. Anne

Anne01 · Anne01

Has anyone ever heard an alcoholic say they don't know who they are after they stop drinking? Anne

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

HI all, Now that I know what ESH means, that is what I am asking for. My husband smokes pot when he goes fishing. A fact I accepted a while ago. Previously he asked me to go fishing with him and I said, not if you intend to smoke, no. If you wont' have a smoke, I will go, if you want to smoke, pick someone else...

John · John

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seekingserenity · seekingserenity

I always have something rolling around in my head and what better place to give it a voice than this message board? Isn't it weird how ideas just hit you out of the blue? Well, I didn't get to go to the morning meeting and I am sitting here irritated as hell as the double standards people have. I KNOW I have n...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

[video=]Well, I'm a little frustrated this evening. Tuesdays are my Al-Anon meeting nights. I had to stay home because I *think* I have a cold - sneezing and runny nose. Meds are doing the trick, except make me feel a bit whacked. That is I feel I'm in fog in terms of my ability to think! So.............

ELEKTRAWMN · ELEKTRAWMN

Bond hearing is tomorrow. Have no clue whatsoever how the judge will rule. Saw ABF tonight. REALLY excited for him to come home....but scared to death at the same time. The last few conversations we've had, HE has brought up his recovery quite a bit. He's asked me to print off a list of the local AA me...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

my kitty is doing so much better every day! she is responding to my husband--she still won't let me pet her but I am giving it some time! To all you cat lover's out there: keep loving them & giving them attention; like my hubby says they will love you back! He sure loves this cat & if anything happen...

oldgraduate · oldgraduate

After the horrible weekend, wherein I fought with my AH and ended up feeling so down on myself, yesterday went really well. I went home to a happy AH, who was cooking dinner and even invited me to sit with him and watch a movie. I almost fell into the trap of thinking, he wants me to stay right here while he...

Brooke · Brooke

Hi, thankyou for being there for me, I hope that others who are seeking help find the support of Alanon too. I finally met and had coffee this week with my local Alanon lady who has supported me over the phone for a couple of months. Tomorrow I will meet another local lady who has also reached out to Al...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

When I got home from my Al Anon meeting last night, my wife was impaired. I didn't stick around for long to see just how bad it was--just went right to bed to read. This morning, there's no acknowledgement of what happened the night before from either of us. We just talk about the weather or the kids or abou...

youfoundme · youfoundme

I got to go to my home group meeting tonight. I was so glad to be there. When I got home this afternoon, something was really bothering me. I realized how controling I really am. I mean, I constantly check up on my A, and my kids, making sure they did the things I asked them to do. I really cried about it t...

kandikween · kandikween

My dad is doing better, talking more normally as far as i've heard. I won't be able to see him until saturday or sunday. My boyfriend's birthday is tomorrow he'll be 23! I feel bad because my focus has been primarily on this situation, I always like to go all out for birthdays. And then there is court on th...

rara avis · rara avis

Update: The past few days I didn't react to my RA bf acting....out? I just went about my business, went to the movies, etc...tried to have the best days possible and didn't show any aggravation. THANK YOU folks for talking about detachment and such, you've been such a help! I'm so happy that worked :) T...

Anne01 · Anne01

What does F2F mean? Anne

Anne01 · Anne01

I am totally new here. And I have a problem maybe someone can help me with. My brother is 44 years old, an alcoholic who is in rehab for the 3rd or 4th time, has 9 DUI's, also eluding police, driving without registration and license many times, I guess 9, and is due to get out of rehab. in a couple months. I lov...

kandikween · kandikween

Has anyone out there had to have a cehhrosis diet or knew someone that has? I've got the basics down, no salt so that means probably no meat. fruits and veggies high in vitamins. I've also been looking into herbs that can help with jaundice, "trailing eclipta' , Milk Thistle. I also read probiot...

ELEKTRAWMN · ELEKTRAWMN

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

HI Right well... I have read and read and read.. posted and read responses. Bought books and read and read. I have sat with my thoughts and feelings and tried to 'feel'. Yesterday I made a few decisions, I don't know how long they will stay as commitments, I don't know if they will work, but I do know yest...

McHurting · McHurting

Greetings all, Today my thoughts are on change, acceptance and moving forward. I had to put my beloved Great Dane down last week, it hurts like crazy but it had to be done. More loss and grief - I can only accept it, with every loss there is pain. I also went to my first alanon F2F meeting yesterday. It was a...

Pushka · Pushka

Courage to Change Pg 180 June 28 I always felt that my loved one's drinking was a terrible reflection on me, and I worried about what people thought. One day he told me he wanted to get sober. I was eladted for a day until his next binge. Then I was devestated. Some moths later, my loved one finally did go...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Not sure if any of the old timers have heard this one, but someone told it at a meeting last night and I thought it was great and wanted to share. A father threw his 2 boys into a horse stall. The stall was full of horse manure. One boy was crying and crying, saying "get me out of here!". But the othe...

McHurting · McHurting

My RA/BFF sent me an amends, it was honest and from the heart. Today is a good day.

Jozie · Jozie

I Just got back from my F2F Meeting tonight, and Boy was I Glad that I Just sat & Listened... So Much Pain in the room tonight, So many bad choices, and bad days, and so many tears... It really for me allows me to see myself as Human when I can relate to those that are Trying so Hard, yet at times feel like th...

Samsgram · Samsgram

May I ask for prayers for my younger brother who is in ICU from the ravishes from the disease. He has been there for days now and my enabling mother by his side daily. I`am filled with so many emotions knowing that he may make it through or he may not. Its my anger that I struggle with for my mom that bothers me...

KLotus · KLotus

Hi Everybody, So glad you are here. Feeling very, very "off" this morning. So much happening that I feel I can hardly begin to sort through. I know I don't have to do my work all at once, that's not what I'm after - but something is blocking me in the immediate sense. Yes, I have a headache, I t...

MrsHennepope · MrsHennepope

Hi all.I'm new to the board and am here because my AH suggested it! I know that sounds strange,but he really has been trying to get better lately.He had an extremely difficult life before we were together( abusive father,failed relationships,drug addictions,death of his daughter etc).I believe h...

Jake831 · Jake831

Hello all. I'm new here, although my mom has been attending regular Al-Anon meetings for a while now. I'm here because my 18-year old sister (two years my junior) is a recovering alcoholic of two years. I'm currently home visiting my family in Chicago, as I live in New York City where I study and work. I'...

michellelong · michellelong

Good morning all, I'm still in a good place mentally at the moment and have been reading my little heart out to help stay this way. My AH has been sober for 8 days and counting (yes I still count) lol What I have previously shared about his upcoming incarceration has fallen apart, and boy I am so mad I could s...

Betterfuture · Betterfuture

I have been in and out of a very hostile, passionate, outrageous relationship w/ my AH for about five years. I guess It just took ME this long to accept he is an alcoholic. We have a 3 year old daughter and plenty of support from family members and friends which is why I still can't understand why he drinks s...

peace · peace

hi everyone, I have not posted in a LONG time probably yrs. However I read allot and can related to it ALL. my story, we would have been married 23 yrs this month. The ups and downs of living just got to be to much for me, the boys are grown and gone and it was just him and I, and every night with beer and other s...

Doozy · Doozy

Just a quick share... I've been away for a few days on vacation with my family. I just have to tell y'all that it was one of the best weekends I have spent with my parents! I have myself, Alanon, and this board to thank along with some counseling. Huge, wonderful changes! Since starting Alanon, my approac...

lovee · lovee

I have been split from my son's father for a year and half now, it was my choice. Now he's dating someone and it's serious. All my grieve and sense of loss is now flooding in. All I can think about is them, I even had dreams about them. I'm trying to stay with my breath and redirect my mind to be in the moment...

Pushka · Pushka

I'm so upset with myself and I'm really trying to be gentle. I'm going to be so gentle that I'm cleaning the house today .. LOL. I've been going to the meetings and it totally helps. I just got off the phone with a wonderful girlfriend of mine. I have to say I do well at surrounding myself with beautiful...

Jozie · Jozie

Boy I Tell Ya... THANK GOD ABove for this Program... Currently it isn't just helping me Deal with My Active A's Or Active Addicts, but also the Going on in the world today, which has triggered the Grouch in my Husband...lol... It Amazes me Daily the Benifit of Just Repeating the Serenity Prayer when He o...

NovSun · NovSun

Confused and hurt again. My Afiance and I had a wonderful weekend. He went to the first private substance abuse counselor appt last Thursday. He said it helped. He will be attending group therapy 2 nights a week for 5 weeks. The counselor recommended an open AA meeting for Friday night. Friday c...

oldgraduate · oldgraduate

Why do I allow myself to go down that ranting, raging road every time? I did everything wrong again this weekend. After the combination of negative eye rolling and ignoring by my AH on Saturday, I blew up again on Sunday morning. That just started the day of raging and arguing and us bringing up every wro...

tommyecat · tommyecat

I had a wonderful time at the week long mountain conference. It was the first time I have attended a conference that had programs for the entire family. AA, Alanon, Alateen, and pre alateen meetings each and every day. There were over 500 people that showed up for the conference with speakers from a...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

Not sure if what I am doing is right or wrong. As I have mentioned in previous posts, my A is not an alcoholic, he is a pot smoker. He relapsed completely 3 days before our wedding. As of the last 4 months, he has reduced his smoking and I have asked that he not smoke if he and I are spending time together. Thi...

leaping lizard · leaping lizard

I have so much to say and ask I am not sure where to start without rambeling. I have been married for 26 years now and not sure if we will make it to 27. In the early years neither of us drank much but when friends came over DH would get beyond drunk. at that time in life I never considered him an alcoholic as i...

Ruby · Ruby

My 26 y.o. a/a grandson with anger management issues, and his 44 y.o. a/a mother also has anger management issues are both homeless, the place they had been using as a home (for the past 6 wks) is no longer available to them. I've already told them they can't stay with me in thier current disease stat...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	If what they're doing is lying... (Preview) What they're feeling is fear. That awareness came from a long program journey plus working as a counselor in a large Rehab Hospital and working with Alternatives to Violence men. Lying or avoiding the truth comes from the fear of being found out and/or wanting to take the pressure off by not measuri...	Jerry F	11	813	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Today was a good day... (Preview) Today I had a quiet day at work and I felt ok. My fiance drank last night, and when I picked him up from work, I knew it. It was 11pm. I didn't react. I kept remembering what I have learned here and am learning from my sponsor... I remained calm. We came home and went to bed. He wasn't terribly drunk, no...	youfoundme	9	526	Aug 12, 2011 by MDK
	Gossip (Preview) Just wondering ... I have a program friend that I love and respect. However, I have overheard her gossiping with other program friends from time to time. I feel uncomfortable about this. I've never participated in the gossip, and I'm not really sure what to do - if anything. My sponsor says that if...	White Rabbit	8	581	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	updates (Preview) Well last week my husband didn't show up for work on time and got suspended from work for 3 days. This is not the first time and if history repeats itself it will not be the last. Instead of worrying or getting mad I just kept my mouth shut and said I hate that for you maybe you need a little break. Well as it tur...	MDK	5	463	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	New Member Looking for Advice on a Family Situation (Preview) Hi, I am the husband of an alcoholic. My wife has struggled and been in and out of rehabs for the past several years. We have 4 young children at home, and her struggles have taken a toll on all of us. She just got back from a 2 month stay at her sister's out of town (her sister is in AA and it was a place where my wi...	a_c_s	12	614	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Asking roommate to move out (Preview) Well, I am having a really good opportunity to practice all my alanon lessons. Tonight, I have asked my roommate to move out. We are friends, and that has made it especially hard for me. As I have started to seriously work through my recovery from these issues of alcoholism, addiction, and dysfunction...	Doozy	4	757	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Health (Preview) I am a pretty healthy person, generally. Nothing is usually physiologically wrong with me, I have some mental things like PTSD (anxiety, panic attacks, depression) and I have worked on that a lot. Now I found out that what the doctor thought was carpal tunnel is actually arthritis of the wrists and...	youfoundme	13	805	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	scared (Preview) Hi my name is Liz, i'm eighteen and i've been living with an alcoholic all of my life. I used to be be very angry with him, he would fly off the handle for no reason, pit my mom against me, say mean things. We would always go back and forth. As I got older, he started grounding me for innapropriate things, on ho...	kandikween	9	2453	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	more thoughts on healthy detachment please (Preview) Hi I have read and read and read. In fact if my boss knew how much I have sat on here and read, I would be sacked... that would give me more time to read though hey. Healthy detachment.. some of things I have read have given me cause to question my belief of what this may look like. I was self taught to walk away...	Lindaoakford	22	538	Aug 12, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Exercised my will and... (Preview) now have another urn with my ashes in it. I asked the question what are you feeling? and should not have. Had a fleeting opportunity to remember the past and to grab a hold of detachement and didn't. I did the samething again that I did in the past and got the same outcome. Does an asprin cure insanity...	Jerry F	8	410	Aug 12, 2011 by Jozie
	I've slipped as many times as my A hubby.. (Preview) Blast from the past, I've slipped so many times in my recovery. I've read some of my past posts and I see how much of my own roller coaster of recovery has been. I need to get help. I wanna be that girl I was in some of my old posts. I'm at square 1 again.	Sincerely	6	322	Aug 12, 2011 by youfoundme
	things do change (Preview) Well nothing stays the same, thank God! I have come to the message board almost everday for a month or two. I have not have time to read or go to a F2F meeting. Listening to all of you and trying to respond and write my own share, has really helped. I am feeling calmer, less flat, and more positive. My As...	Lyne	5	428	Aug 12, 2011 by tommyecat
	Poetry...art...an outlet (Preview) -- Edited by youfoundme on Thursday 11th of August 2011 02:57:01 PM -- Edited by youfoundme on Thursday 11th of August 2011 09:22:59 PM	youfoundme	2	287	Aug 12, 2011 by tommyecat
	Please keep us in your thoughts (Preview) Hi Those who know me on these boards know I have been married to AH for 39 years (+7 months). He has been alcohol dependant for last 6 or so years and his health has been seriously declining for the last 2 years. He is now in hospital for the last time. His liver has all but ceased functioning and his lungs are...	Tattyhead	14	451	Aug 11, 2011 by Pushka
	I'm late I'm late (Preview) for a very important date .. lol .. I feel like the white rabbit from Alice and Wonderland!! Have a wonderful night all, Hugs P :)	Pushka	1	347	Aug 11, 2011 by youfoundme
	Day 2 - how it finished up (all my posts are long) (Preview) Hi I feel a bit like I am writing a novel here but I just had to tell you guys about yesterday. If you have been following my posts (which I know some have) you may remember that I was feeling anxious about not checking up on him, and I sat and talked to the 'dope drawer'. In the afternoon, I was actually scare...	Lindaoakford	5	388	Aug 11, 2011 by youfoundme
	Books On Order (Preview) My books are on order, Courage to Change, One Day at a Time and Getting them Sober. They are due to arrive next Monday. My 2nd ever meeting is tonight and I am looking forward to it. The Afiance and I had a pretty good week. I am not sure if he actually drank on Monday or really went to dinner and the AA meet...	NovSun	8	470	Aug 11, 2011 by NovSun
	Feeling Stupid (Preview) Just a ball of emotions today. I feel like I can't win. I feel stupid for looking the other way when my Afiance is right there in front of me, acting intoxicated. Like I am just oblivious to what is going on in my life, in MY house. Then, I get angry and feel like I have to prove I am right by checking phone re...	NovSun	8	505	Aug 11, 2011 by NovSun
	When I don't know what else to do... I wash my dogs! (Preview) [video=]	John	5	405	Aug 11, 2011 by GailMichelle
	tags (Preview) Hello, can someone tell me what those little tag and thread things are on my posts and how do I get rid of them? Thank you. Anne	Anne01	2	355	Aug 11, 2011 by Anne01
	who am I (Preview) Has anyone ever heard an alcoholic say they don't know who they are after they stop drinking? Anne	Anne01	8	376	Aug 11, 2011 by Anne01
	help for Sunday (Preview) HI all, Now that I know what ESH means, that is what I am asking for. My husband smokes pot when he goes fishing. A fact I accepted a while ago. Previously he asked me to go fishing with him and I said, not if you intend to smoke, no. If you wont' have a smoke, I will go, if you want to smoke, pick someone else...	Lindaoakford	5	476	Aug 11, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	One Day At A Time... (Preview) [video=]	John	0	262	Aug 11, 2011 by John
	it suddenly occured to me... (Preview) I always have something rolling around in my head and what better place to give it a voice than this message board? Isn't it weird how ideas just hit you out of the blue? Well, I didn't get to go to the morning meeting and I am sitting here irritated as hell as the double standards people have. I KNOW I have n...	seekingserenity	2	338	Aug 11, 2011 by youfoundme
	I Can't Go To a Meeting Tonight (Preview) [video=]Well, I'm a little frustrated this evening. Tuesdays are my Al-Anon meeting nights. I had to stay home because I think I have a cold - sneezing and runny nose. Meds are doing the trick, except make me feel a bit whacked. That is I feel I'm in fog in terms of my ability to think! So.............	GailMichelle	6	342	Aug 11, 2011 by Cloudsea
	Could use some positive vibes... (Preview) Bond hearing is tomorrow. Have no clue whatsoever how the judge will rule. Saw ABF tonight. REALLY excited for him to come home....but scared to death at the same time. The last few conversations we've had, HE has brought up his recovery quite a bit. He's asked me to print off a list of the local AA me...	ELEKTRAWMN	10	518	Aug 11, 2011 by Cloudsea
	kitty is still on the mend! (Preview) my kitty is doing so much better every day! she is responding to my husband--she still won't let me pet her but I am giving it some time! To all you cat lover's out there: keep loving them & giving them attention; like my hubby says they will love you back! He sure loves this cat & if anything happen...	Hoot Nanny	7	350	Aug 11, 2011 by Cloudsea
	Every day is new - who figured? (Preview) After the horrible weekend, wherein I fought with my AH and ended up feeling so down on myself, yesterday went really well. I went home to a happy AH, who was cooking dinner and even invited me to sit with him and watch a movie. I almost fell into the trap of thinking, he wants me to stay right here while he...	oldgraduate	7	485	Aug 11, 2011 by Cloudsea
	I'm so grateful for Alanon, went to my first meeting today, and met local lady too... (Preview) Hi, thankyou for being there for me, I hope that others who are seeking help find the support of Alanon too. I finally met and had coffee this week with my local Alanon lady who has supported me over the phone for a couple of months. Tomorrow I will meet another local lady who has also reached out to Al...	Brooke	6	301	Aug 11, 2011 by Ruby
	Saying nothing the next day just feels so wrong.... (Preview) When I got home from my Al Anon meeting last night, my wife was impaired. I didn't stick around for long to see just how bad it was--just went right to bed to read. This morning, there's no acknowledgement of what happened the night before from either of us. We just talk about the weather or the kids or abou...	usedtobeanyer	19	953	Aug 11, 2011 by ntxalanon
	The meeting tonight (Preview) I got to go to my home group meeting tonight. I was so glad to be there. When I got home this afternoon, something was really bothering me. I realized how controling I really am. I mean, I constantly check up on my A, and my kids, making sure they did the things I asked them to do. I really cried about it t...	youfoundme	4	329	Aug 11, 2011 by youfoundme
	day 6 in the hospital...... (Preview) My dad is doing better, talking more normally as far as i've heard. I won't be able to see him until saturday or sunday. My boyfriend's birthday is tomorrow he'll be 23! I feel bad because my focus has been primarily on this situation, I always like to go all out for birthdays. And then there is court on th...	kandikween	2	360	Aug 11, 2011 by tommyecat
	I didn't react! :) But...I'm so confused?! ESH? (Preview) Update: The past few days I didn't react to my RA bf acting....out? I just went about my business, went to the movies, etc...tried to have the best days possible and didn't show any aggravation. THANK YOU folks for talking about detachment and such, you've been such a help! I'm so happy that worked :) T...	rara avis	3	366	Aug 11, 2011 by Pushka
	F2F (Preview) What does F2F mean? Anne	Anne01	3	328	Aug 11, 2011 by tommyecat
	enabler or helper (Preview) I am totally new here. And I have a problem maybe someone can help me with. My brother is 44 years old, an alcoholic who is in rehab for the 3rd or 4th time, has 9 DUI's, also eluding police, driving without registration and license many times, I guess 9, and is due to get out of rehab. in a couple months. I lov...	Anne01	11	909	Aug 11, 2011 by lasthope
	cehhrosis diet *sp? (Preview) Has anyone out there had to have a cehhrosis diet or knew someone that has? I've got the basics down, no salt so that means probably no meat. fruits and veggies high in vitamins. I've also been looking into herbs that can help with jaundice, "trailing eclipta' , Milk Thistle. I also read probiot...	kandikween	9	506	Aug 11, 2011 by Anne01
	I got a lot out of this today...thought I'd share (Preview)	ELEKTRAWMN	8	321	Aug 10, 2011 by Anne01
	Day 2 (Preview) HI Right well... I have read and read and read.. posted and read responses. Bought books and read and read. I have sat with my thoughts and feelings and tried to 'feel'. Yesterday I made a few decisions, I don't know how long they will stay as commitments, I don't know if they will work, but I do know yest...	Lindaoakford	4	492	Aug 10, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	Acceptance (Preview) Greetings all, Today my thoughts are on change, acceptance and moving forward. I had to put my beloved Great Dane down last week, it hurts like crazy but it had to be done. More loss and grief - I can only accept it, with every loss there is pain. I also went to my first alanon F2F meeting yesterday. It was a...	McHurting	9	706	Aug 10, 2011 by kandikween
	Read tonight at the meeting :) (Preview) Courage to Change Pg 180 June 28 I always felt that my loved one's drinking was a terrible reflection on me, and I worried about what people thought. One day he told me he wanted to get sober. I was eladted for a day until his next binge. Then I was devestated. Some moths later, my loved one finally did go...	Pushka	8	558	Aug 10, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	Two boys in a horse stall (Preview) Not sure if any of the old timers have heard this one, but someone told it at a meeting last night and I thought it was great and wanted to share. A father threw his 2 boys into a horse stall. The stall was full of horse manure. One boy was crying and crying, saying "get me out of here!". But the othe...	usedtobeanyer	4	539	Aug 10, 2011 by rara avis
	Can I change my user name from McHurting to McHoping? (Preview) My RA/BFF sent me an amends, it was honest and from the heart. Today is a good day.	McHurting	4	316	Aug 10, 2011 by tommyecat
	Tough Meeting.... (Preview) I Just got back from my F2F Meeting tonight, and Boy was I Glad that I Just sat & Listened... So Much Pain in the room tonight, So many bad choices, and bad days, and so many tears... It really for me allows me to see myself as Human when I can relate to those that are Trying so Hard, yet at times feel like th...	Jozie	3	493	Aug 10, 2011 by youfoundme
	Brother dying from the disease, please say a prayer (Preview) May I ask for prayers for my younger brother who is in ICU from the ravishes from the disease. He has been there for days now and my enabling mother by his side daily. I`am filled with so many emotions knowing that he may make it through or he may not. Its my anger that I struggle with for my mom that bothers me...	Samsgram	14	655	Aug 9, 2011 by Pushka
	ACoA continued (Preview) Hi Everybody, So glad you are here. Feeling very, very "off" this morning. So much happening that I feel I can hardly begin to sort through. I know I don't have to do my work all at once, that's not what I'm after - but something is blocking me in the immediate sense. Yes, I have a headache, I t...	KLotus	9	622	Aug 9, 2011 by hiflying1
	New here (Preview) Hi all.I'm new to the board and am here because my AH suggested it! I know that sounds strange,but he really has been trying to get better lately.He had an extremely difficult life before we were together( abusive father,failed relationships,drug addictions,death of his daughter etc).I believe h...	MrsHennepope	10	438	Aug 9, 2011 by MrsHennepope
	Part of the disease? Really? Need advice. (Preview) Hello all. I'm new here, although my mom has been attending regular Al-Anon meetings for a while now. I'm here because my 18-year old sister (two years my junior) is a recovering alcoholic of two years. I'm currently home visiting my family in Chicago, as I live in New York City where I study and work. I'...	Jake831	10	561	Aug 9, 2011 by Kate1979
	a little disturbed (Preview) Good morning all, I'm still in a good place mentally at the moment and have been reading my little heart out to help stay this way. My AH has been sober for 8 days and counting (yes I still count) lol What I have previously shared about his upcoming incarceration has fallen apart, and boy I am so mad I could s...	michellelong	11	672	Aug 9, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	hope i made the right choice (Preview) I have been in and out of a very hostile, passionate, outrageous relationship w/ my AH for about five years. I guess It just took ME this long to accept he is an alcoholic. We have a 3 year old daughter and plenty of support from family members and friends which is why I still can't understand why he drinks s...	Betterfuture	5	500	Aug 9, 2011 by jbunny
	My Story (Preview) hi everyone, I have not posted in a LONG time probably yrs. However I read allot and can related to it ALL. my story, we would have been married 23 yrs this month. The ups and downs of living just got to be to much for me, the boys are grown and gone and it was just him and I, and every night with beer and other s...	peace	6	597	Aug 9, 2011 by GreenK
	Something hopeful :) (Preview) Just a quick share... I've been away for a few days on vacation with my family. I just have to tell y'all that it was one of the best weekends I have spent with my parents! I have myself, Alanon, and this board to thank along with some counseling. Huge, wonderful changes! Since starting Alanon, my approac...	Doozy	8	508	Aug 9, 2011 by GreenK
	Trying to stay in the moment (Preview) I have been split from my son's father for a year and half now, it was my choice. Now he's dating someone and it's serious. All my grieve and sense of loss is now flooding in. All I can think about is them, I even had dreams about them. I'm trying to stay with my breath and redirect my mind to be in the moment...	lovee	6	366	Aug 9, 2011 by tommyecat
	Struggling with detachment and disconnect (Preview) I'm so upset with myself and I'm really trying to be gentle. I'm going to be so gentle that I'm cleaning the house today .. LOL. I've been going to the meetings and it totally helps. I just got off the phone with a wonderful girlfriend of mine. I have to say I do well at surrounding myself with beautiful...	Pushka	10	998	Aug 9, 2011 by Pushka
	Practice Practice Practice ;) (Preview) Boy I Tell Ya... THANK GOD ABove for this Program... Currently it isn't just helping me Deal with My Active A's Or Active Addicts, but also the Going on in the world today, which has triggered the Grouch in my Husband...lol... It Amazes me Daily the Benifit of Just Repeating the Serenity Prayer when He o...	Jozie	6	366	Aug 9, 2011 by Ruby
	Confused and hurt again (Preview) Confused and hurt again. My Afiance and I had a wonderful weekend. He went to the first private substance abuse counselor appt last Thursday. He said it helped. He will be attending group therapy 2 nights a week for 5 weeks. The counselor recommended an open AA meeting for Friday night. Friday c...	NovSun	12	556	Aug 9, 2011 by youfoundme
	Why do I keep getting sucked in? (Preview) Why do I allow myself to go down that ranting, raging road every time? I did everything wrong again this weekend. After the combination of negative eye rolling and ignoring by my AH on Saturday, I blew up again on Sunday morning. That just started the day of raging and arguing and us bringing up every wro...	oldgraduate	16	764	Aug 9, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	Had a great time (Preview) I had a wonderful time at the week long mountain conference. It was the first time I have attended a conference that had programs for the entire family. AA, Alanon, Alateen, and pre alateen meetings each and every day. There were over 500 people that showed up for the conference with speakers from a...	tommyecat	9	452	Aug 8, 2011 by Doozy
	did I do this wrong (Preview) Not sure if what I am doing is right or wrong. As I have mentioned in previous posts, my A is not an alcoholic, he is a pot smoker. He relapsed completely 3 days before our wedding. As of the last 4 months, he has reduced his smoking and I have asked that he not smoke if he and I are spending time together. Thi...	Lindaoakford	20	671	Aug 8, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	sorry just another newbie here.... (Preview) I have so much to say and ask I am not sure where to start without rambeling. I have been married for 26 years now and not sure if we will make it to 27. In the early years neither of us drank much but when friends came over DH would get beyond drunk. at that time in life I never considered him an alcoholic as i...	leaping lizard	7	537	Aug 8, 2011 by Doozy
	Feeling pressured! (Preview) My 26 y.o. a/a grandson with anger management issues, and his 44 y.o. a/a mother also has anger management issues are both homeless, the place they had been using as a home (for the past 6 wks) is no longer available to them. I've already told them they can't stay with me in thier current disease stat...	Ruby	7	648	Aug 8, 2011 by Samsgram
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.