Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

debhud · debhud

i haven't been on the board for a couple of years. (AH has been clean for going on 2 years.) my 36 year old adult son is active. he has been in the hospital for pancreatitis where the docs told him he had to stop drinking or he would die. his wife left him (with the children) after 15 years of his addiction. a...

pineapple · pineapple

I suppose some of you are tired of reading my posts regarding my A-he's drinking himself to death, he quits for a week and feels good, he starts drinking again and is suicidal, etc., etc. Believe me, you can't be any more tired of reading it than I am of living it. But now for the good news-for the last six mo...

recovery2012 · recovery2012

Hi - Its my first time here. Im really greatful to have found this - as I am anxious if i was to go to a f2f meeting I would get to upset - sounds silly. My recent ex of 5 years is in recovery for 4 of those years,its been a rollercoaster of love, tears, laughs and adventures and everything that goes with it. Due t...

Bargee · Bargee

I trusted him to not drink tonight while he looked after our daughter. I went out at 6 to my soccer teams quiz night. I told my H that I was getting a ride with a friend. He asked what would happen if he needed me to come home in case our D wouldn't take the bottle from him. I said he could come pick me up. He pa...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

I am the kind of person who throws themself into work when things get hard. I don't even do it purposely, I just want to keep busy so that I am always around people/friends. Things seem to be moving in a scary direction because for the first time I am taking control of my life and responsibility for my own ha...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

My husband for sure has skin cancer as we found out yesterday. He is OK although he has to go back for more treatments. I am hoping & praying that he doesn't have to go through too much & me either. I am very nervous as is he. I guess the cancer is spreading in my family. My dad died of it last December a...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

Ok I try my hardest to use loving detachment everywhere so bear with me. And I'll admit right up front I still screw up but every once in awhile it clicks and I get it. I've been working with my son. He's in a classroom for multiple "issues". He has dyslexia and auditory processing disord...

silent · silent

church was a great blessing to me this morning for they said theres no reason to be bored or be idle time for theres so much to do in the church in doing service and this is sooo true,i do need you here ..my dear freinds in alanon for you kept me from picking up that phone and makeing that phone call to my ex a/d ,...

katfshh · katfshh

I haven't been here in so long, or to a face to face meeting in months. I seriously thought this time he was going to stay sober. He has been working his program for a year and made it through all 12 steps. But, on his 1 year sober date, he took off to spend the evening with his son. That was May 2nd. He hasn't bee...

stephaniej · stephaniej

We had a pretty rotten weekend, centered around a HUGE fight on Saturday night. The worst one ever, with the usual verbal abuse from my AH plus a tirade the likes of which I had never seen before from him. He trotted out "I hate you and I want a divorce" for at least the fifth or sixth time in the...

Jozie · Jozie

Today has been a Tough Day... I attended a Furneral service the last two days for a dear lady that I knew from early on in my childhood... Tho she will be Missed Dearly, at 83 with all that was goin wrong, I would much rather her be with her HP then suffering here... I Grew up with her Grandkids when my Parents...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

I am liking learning all this great stuff like not enabling, having boundaries, not feeling "bad" for having boundaries, etc. My son is not liking it. This is my oldest, about to be 16. He has been nothing but rude, disrespectful and condescending. Sadly the result is that the fun thing...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

I read a quote once in Courage to Change that worry is like a rocking chair; it may give me something to do for a few hours but it doesn't get me anywhere. based on previous posts I made I see how I had stepped out of today and was living two weeks from today. guess how far that got me? anyway I'm back in today and...

london · london

My daughter is a binge alcoholic. After five years of successful sobriety she has lapsed back to drinking for the last year and one half. Countless rehabs and hospitlizations have ensued. I am losing hope. I have done everything that I can think of to be supportive. She has been drinking all of th...

living for me · living for me

Its been one week since I've separated from my AH and I am truly enjoying the drama free peace that I have. Feeling a little lonely but it's not unmanageable. Just taking my life one day at a time and focusing on what I can do to be calm, healthy and happy. I've even begun attending meetings and have already...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I heard a song awhile back called "If it don't come easy, you gotta let it go!" Sometimes this is true for me. I have such a complicated mind that the easy things don't come that way. Does that make sense? I have been this way forever. I think that if things are too hard, I bolt! I just want it the ea...

bettyboop · bettyboop

My whole dang world in crumbling around me... Background: ABF and I were going to purchase a home in another state and move there. I put up my protion of the money while we were there and he was to put up his when we got back home...long story short...he NEVER did and I lost all my money and the house. He went...

silent · silent

which is good for me im trying to stay as busy as i can,but the hurt is still there i miss his loveing sounds ensane for me to be even saying that after he gave me std and he didnt clear his up but now he got his std while we were broken up the 1st time for a year ,im talking crazy and thinking crazy now this is why im...

teenyweenytadpole · teenyweenytadpole

Hi all, am new here online, am planning to attend a f2f meeting tomorrow but work commitments mean it will be impossible to make this a regular thing so I was really pleased to find this forum. I don't know how much to say without this becoming an essay, but basically I am struggling now with knowing how an...

f2fmember · f2fmember

Do you know that there are links to this site directly from google? It took me straight into a board conversation. I know the internet isn't completely safe but I thought this site was protected from finding its way onto public search engines? f2fmember

Grace7 · Grace7

Hello Everyone. We do NOT have enough people willing to facilitate meetings on the Al-Anon site. We are currently covered Mon-Fri mornings and evenings. Hooray to each of you!!! Weekends are a Big problem, and this is a time of the biggest need for meetings! I Believe, we are ALL accountable and...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

Last night I had my F2F meeting. It was on step 5, it was a great meeting! I got home and my AH had made dinner and the little warmer lit. For Easter he had given me a candle warmer with lilac scented oil. Yesterday he purchased little scented wax not candles but I don't know what the name is. There is a point, p...

rara avis · rara avis

After trying and failing to get another EPO [ emergency protection order, cop on duty was going on his weekend in 1/2 hour and made that clear ] my lawyer took the bull by the horns and asked for a temporary restraining order, which was approved and served. Now we have a court date for May 16 for the restrai...

stephaniej · stephaniej

And all in all, things generally went my way. You never go to court expecting everything to go your way...just never happens. By and large the judge sided with me, and my payments to my ex will increase a small amount, but nowhere near what he was asking for. Also, he is now resonsible for paying 1/3 of...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Man, my HP spoke to me loud and clear today. I have spent the whole week wound tight as a drum. Child support/attorneys fees payment hearing on Thursday with my ex (recall that I pay HIM child support and alimony, and now he wants me to pay his attorneys' fees for harassing me in court, all after I took a 65...

Pushka · Pushka

I grew up being told I didn't feel one way or the other in specific situations. My grandpa died I wasn't allowed to be sad. This was my perception of the situation as a kid, I was stuttered in how I grieved (My mother and grandma fell apart, there was no place for me TO fall apart in my minds eye). I wasn't a...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'm just trying to get this message posted before I leave for work. I could use a little feedback. My boss has helped me to assist a team member. Although I don't work directly for him, and do work directly for her; he is management. He and I had a meeting yesterday and most of the hour was spent listeni...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I have been feeling compelled to talk to my AH about my trust issues with him. He quit drinking after the DUI in February. We have had no intimacy in our marriage since then because I just plain old don't want to do 'it' with someone I don't trust yet. He hasn't approached me about the subject. He is so wrapp...

tanyanubin · tanyanubin

My family is so toxic...it's just so painful sometimes. My husband and I are both celebrating 30 years sober this year. However, I have lost 2 brothers to alcohol, and I have an older sister who is newly out of jail and in a homeless shelter in New England. Writing this stuns me. I simply can't believe it h...

Mom_of_ 3 · Mom_of_ 3

I am new here. Sorry for starting right out the gate with this but need advice fast. My parents are coming down for a five day visit and I found out last night my Dad decided he could drink once a week and he will be OK. My family has hit pre-deployment mode (military family) and I really do not want to have to...

Hope For Change · Hope For Change

Christmas before last....Christmas day....driving to Nanna's house with our SIX...children....I stayed home sick. Texts from 3 older kids. "SOMETHING" wrong with Daddy. He can't stay awake. Acting funny. Something wrong. When I realized..."HOW" bad. Ambien. Mixe...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I live in a rented 2 bedroom house on Lake Michigan way out in the woods with only 2 neighbors that I can see through the trees. I have a great yard, private beach and well it is beautiful and serene way out here. It was the best place I could have found while seperating and later divorcing my AH. It has priva...

Grace7 · Grace7

Sign up below for the date and time you can and will OP. Thank You ahead of time!!! You Are Appreciated for this!!! Saturday May 5 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ Sunday May 6 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ 7 PM Easter...

pineapple · pineapple

As mentioned in my previous post my A went over a week without drinking. It was not by choice, it was because he lost his wallet and ATM card. He had no money and I wouldn't give him any. He was starting to look better and he said he felt better. I was hopeful that this might be a new beginning for him. Silly me....

Tracy · Tracy

My exabf has been drinking for about ten weeks and we seperated. He has been really ill. I made the mistake of getting intimate with him about a week ago after a girls night out. He has now gone back to AA so he says and wants to talk. I do not want to talk I told him I made a mistake and apologised for sending...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

I was viewing Oprah's most recent Life Class that is streamed online. One of her guests was Iyanla Vanzant. She said that there are two ways to tell your story. One keeps you in a rut, while the other one gets you into the flow of life. Rut Story: I loved Booboo (her word, not mine) I gave Booboo my all And...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

My AH is flying back to MD today for his dad's funeral. My son and I are joining him tomorrow. AH had his license suspended for the month of May but hasn't gotten the notice from the DMV yet. He is going to rent a car in MD and I don't think he's going to have any problems because he's with the corporate plan...

Pushka · Pushka

I have to say I have 3 situations that are looming at the moment where I am unsure where to go. I have given it to God (HP) and am trying to keep my hands out of them. 1 situation I'm going to let go of .. I know that God's timing may not be mine however it also means that things will be arranged the way I need them...

I am lost · I am lost

ok, so this is only my third time posting on here, I just don't know what else to do!! last night my a/h was drinking of course and he always wants to "talk" when he is drinking. he first started with our finances, then it was how he feels my mother has a negative inpact on our relationship (so not...

Fina · Fina

Recovery Meditations ~ Birthright ~ One Day at a Time ~ April 23, 2012:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~RECOVERY MEDITATIONSOne Day at a TimeApril 23, 2012~ BIRTHRIGHT ~:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~I've continued to recognize the power individuals have to change vir...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

I went for a hike yesterday. 6 miles roundtrip on a mountain. It was a beautiful day but as I progressed up the mountain, fog blew in and clouded any view. The effect was surreal, but perfectly suited my place in time. I'm in that murky middle space in between the worlds of the past and the future. I do...

Jozie · Jozie

Hello All... been a Long Time... I am Still Survivin this Crazy World & Sometimes even have moments I Feel like I "Strivin", So I Suppose I am On the Correct Road Currently... I Still make my Meetings as Often as I can, Hope to make one tonight ;) Yea know Going to the my F2F Meetings & Se...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I need some well wishes, good thoughts and prayers for any who will offer them! I am going to a job interview and to look at 2 apartments. This move is 1 month away and I am just shocked I am taking my girls and I to a new town with nobody there that I know and I am staying in motion and feeling hopeful about it. Wh...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Ah's father passed away today at the wonderful old age of 89. Some of you may remember that my father passed away about 4.5 months ago, at the age of 62. We may all be going across the country for the funeral. I'm not sure how my son will handle this as his anxiety and stress levels really went through the...

Dolly Llama · Dolly Llama

One of the most infuriating aspects of my marriage was that my AH assumes my intentions, thoughts, and feelings. He's also a Narcissist, and I'm sure a lot of this assuming is actually projection of his own thoughts. Sometimes, it feels like a manipulation, that I am supposed to jump in and correct h...

Debilyn · Debilyn

just sharing btw son sent me a message. We are now communicating.

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Life holds so much--so much to be happy about always. Most people ask for happiness on condition. Happiness can be felt only if you don't set conditions. -Artur Rubinstein That last sentence is very very powerful...

Tigger · Tigger

Being heard is incredibly important to me. I hate being misunderstood or disregarded when I try to express myself. I used a different tack today with my partner and feel I made some progress. I have been recognising the things I do that block my chances of being heard and taken seriously. For example my...

Tracey C · Tracey C

Disappointments all round again. When will it all stop? I guess when I choose to put myself first. Tracey

Oksie · Oksie

Hi everyone I have been back for about a week. I haven't been on here as much as I was before I went away. I have spent quite a bit of time here today though. Since coming back from holidays.. I have felt a little tense for some reason. I guess I am waiting for him to go back to using after being 'good' while we...

silent · silent

its now been 9 days no contact with my a/d ex b/f he is still on my face book and we both was just on at the same time i wanted ,oh how i wanted to say something to him or him say something to me or just send me something but no not nothing i posted things and he posted a country song video ,i finally thought it best j...

Temple · Temple

That is a quote from A Course in Miracles. This helps me so much when I'm fuming, frustrated, depressed. Makes me take a step back. Sometimes I am upset with myself for having been lax and letting a situation develop that could have been prevented. Sometimes it is displaced anger--it would be too sc...

amills4294 · amills4294

Boy it was fun and it went well! We have a fairly well structured group so it was fairly easy to do. I picked boundaries as my topic and did some readings from Hope for Today. Lots of great shares. It was nice to feel like I did a good job. It was nice to be in a roomfull of non judgemental people. Right befo...

Oksie · Oksie

One year ago...approximately.. I attended the office of a psychologist in tears, ready to kill myself and not knowing how my life had disintegrated to the point it was at. I thought I had it 'sorted'. Great husband, great life. Then... my husband relapsed into pot use/drug addiction. We were married...

Corgi2 · Corgi2

Hey everyone. Hope you are all doing well. I spent my birthday and whole weekend in bed with a horrible flu and sinus infection that didn't help me too much because I didn't get to any meetings. I really needed them. It just gave me time to sit and think...and my thoughts hurt. I keep going to pick up my phon...

Pushka · Pushka

The train wreck is coming in ways that boggle the mind. I knew he was sick, I get that he's sick .. I just didn't realize how sick until two and two got put together. It's not that I didn't see it or get it .. what I get now is how fast the train is coming. I have the same feeling I had a few months before the DUI....

Nutbrownhare · Nutbrownhare

Has anyone else had this problem, and if so, how did you deal with it? Briefly, I'd been in a long-distance relationship with my partner, decided to move the 200 miles to join him... and then the relationship really started going downhill. Basically I'd walked into a situation with a heavy drinker wi...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. See I know it. I also know how to do it. I have a loving, caring wife who doesn't refrain from giving me suggestions about self care. A couple of weeks ago I blinded myself in my right eye. I wasn't wearing safety glass...

Fina · Fina

Recovery Meditations ~ Unity ~ One Day At A Time ~ April 28, 2012 :~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~: RECOVERY MEDITATIONS One Day at a Time April 28, 2012 ~ UNITY ~ :~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~: Separate reeds are weak and easily broken; but bound together they are str...

Debilyn · Debilyn

For over 4 months now my son has not contacted me. We were as always ok and close. Then some dumb thing happened and he got upset as he thought I didn't see how upset he was. I just said no worries I will take care of it. That made him mad as he thought I was putting him down for being upset. It was over something i...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	my AS is slowly dying.. (Preview) i haven't been on the board for a couple of years. (AH has been clean for going on 2 years.) my 36 year old adult son is active. he has been in the hospital for pancreatitis where the docs told him he had to stop drinking or he would die. his wife left him (with the children) after 15 years of his addiction. a...	debhud	7	664	May 7, 2012 by orchidlover
	TCOMF (Preview) I suppose some of you are tired of reading my posts regarding my A-he's drinking himself to death, he quits for a week and feels good, he starts drinking again and is suicidal, etc., etc. Believe me, you can't be any more tired of reading it than I am of living it. But now for the good news-for the last six mo...	pineapple	5	569	May 7, 2012 by orchidlover
	When do you walk away for good - even though you still love them? (Preview) Hi - Its my first time here. Im really greatful to have found this - as I am anxious if i was to go to a f2f meeting I would get to upset - sounds silly. My recent ex of 5 years is in recovery for 4 of those years,its been a rollercoaster of love, tears, laughs and adventures and everything that goes with it. Due t...	recovery2012	6	789	May 7, 2012 by recovery2012
	Am I Over Reacting (Preview) I trusted him to not drink tonight while he looked after our daughter. I went out at 6 to my soccer teams quiz night. I told my H that I was getting a ride with a friend. He asked what would happen if he needed me to come home in case our D wouldn't take the bottle from him. I said he could come pick me up. He pa...	Bargee	15	857	May 7, 2012 by Pushka
	Feeling my feelings (Preview) I am the kind of person who throws themself into work when things get hard. I don't even do it purposely, I just want to keep busy so that I am always around people/friends. Things seem to be moving in a scary direction because for the first time I am taking control of my life and responsibility for my own ha...	Corgi2	4	383	May 7, 2012 by Bargee
	cancer but not to worry! (Preview) My husband for sure has skin cancer as we found out yesterday. He is OK although he has to go back for more treatments. I am hoping & praying that he doesn't have to go through too much & me either. I am very nervous as is he. I guess the cancer is spreading in my family. My dad died of it last December a...	Hoot Nanny	5	505	May 7, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	"I can't" and logic with an 8 year old (Preview) Ok I try my hardest to use loving detachment everywhere so bear with me. And I'll admit right up front I still screw up but every once in awhile it clicks and I get it. I've been working with my son. He's in a classroom for multiple "issues". He has dyslexia and auditory processing disord...	AStrongerMe	10	681	May 7, 2012 by xqz
	ITS FINALLY SUNDAY AND IM BETTER (Preview) church was a great blessing to me this morning for they said theres no reason to be bored or be idle time for theres so much to do in the church in doing service and this is sooo true,i do need you here ..my dear freinds in alanon for you kept me from picking up that phone and makeing that phone call to my ex a/d ,...	silent	3	508	May 7, 2012 by hotrod
	One year later..like clock work. (Preview) I haven't been here in so long, or to a face to face meeting in months. I seriously thought this time he was going to stay sober. He has been working his program for a year and made it through all 12 steps. But, on his 1 year sober date, he took off to spend the evening with his son. That was May 2nd. He hasn't bee...	katfshh	14	652	May 6, 2012 by pinkchip
	Digging DEEP into my Al Anon Toolbox today (Preview) We had a pretty rotten weekend, centered around a HUGE fight on Saturday night. The worst one ever, with the usual verbal abuse from my AH plus a tirade the likes of which I had never seen before from him. He trotted out "I hate you and I want a divorce" for at least the fifth or sixth time in the...	stephaniej	6	1304	May 6, 2012 by Iamgood
	And So Shall it Be... (Preview) Today has been a Tough Day... I attended a Furneral service the last two days for a dear lady that I knew from early on in my childhood... Tho she will be Missed Dearly, at 83 with all that was goin wrong, I would much rather her be with her HP then suffering here... I Grew up with her Grandkids when my Parents...	Jozie	4	563	May 6, 2012 by Jerry F
	Well, OK then knock yourself out... (Preview) I am liking learning all this great stuff like not enabling, having boundaries, not feeling "bad" for having boundaries, etc. My son is not liking it. This is my oldest, about to be 16. He has been nothing but rude, disrespectful and condescending. Sadly the result is that the fun thing...	AStrongerMe	7	676	May 6, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	the rocking chair (Preview) I read a quote once in Courage to Change that worry is like a rocking chair; it may give me something to do for a few hours but it doesn't get me anywhere. based on previous posts I made I see how I had stepped out of today and was living two weeks from today. guess how far that got me? anyway I'm back in today and...	Wolfie55	3	394	May 6, 2012 by pineapple
	desperate (Preview) My daughter is a binge alcoholic. After five years of successful sobriety she has lapsed back to drinking for the last year and one half. Countless rehabs and hospitlizations have ensued. I am losing hope. I have done everything that I can think of to be supportive. She has been drinking all of th...	london	9	742	May 5, 2012 by pinkchip
	Clearing my head (Preview) Its been one week since I've separated from my AH and I am truly enjoying the drama free peace that I have. Feeling a little lonely but it's not unmanageable. Just taking my life one day at a time and focusing on what I can do to be calm, healthy and happy. I've even begun attending meetings and have already...	living for me	2	418	May 5, 2012 by Breakingfree
	if it don't come easy... (Preview) I heard a song awhile back called "If it don't come easy, you gotta let it go!" Sometimes this is true for me. I have such a complicated mind that the easy things don't come that way. Does that make sense? I have been this way forever. I think that if things are too hard, I bolt! I just want it the ea...	Hoot Nanny	3	391	May 5, 2012 by Jerry F
	DESPERATE need HELP! (Preview) My whole dang world in crumbling around me... Background: ABF and I were going to purchase a home in another state and move there. I put up my protion of the money while we were there and he was to put up his when we got back home...long story short...he NEVER did and I lost all my money and the house. He went...	bettyboop	7	603	May 5, 2012 by Jerry F
	3 weeks no contact or hear. (Preview) which is good for me im trying to stay as busy as i can,but the hurt is still there i miss his loveing sounds ensane for me to be even saying that after he gave me std and he didnt clear his up but now he got his std while we were broken up the 1st time for a year ,im talking crazy and thinking crazy now this is why im...	silent	7	1789	May 5, 2012 by Jerry F
	Hi, new here and a question - when do you call it a day? (Preview) Hi all, am new here online, am planning to attend a f2f meeting tomorrow but work commitments mean it will be impossible to make this a regular thing so I was really pleased to find this forum. I don't know how much to say without this becoming an essay, but basically I am struggling now with knowing how an...	teenyweenytadpole	11	731	May 5, 2012 by Bargee
	Security question (Preview) Do you know that there are links to this site directly from google? It took me straight into a board conversation. I know the internet isn't completely safe but I thought this site was protected from finding its way onto public search engines? f2fmember	f2fmember	3	390	May 5, 2012 by f2fmember
	Weekend Meeting OPS Needed....just Once a Month!!! (Preview) Hello Everyone. We do NOT have enough people willing to facilitate meetings on the Al-Anon site. We are currently covered Mon-Fri mornings and evenings. Hooray to each of you!!! Weekends are a Big problem, and this is a time of the biggest need for meetings! I Believe, we are ALL accountable and...	Grace7	5	450	May 5, 2012 by lacewing
	Flashing Forehead Sign (Preview) Last night I had my F2F meeting. It was on step 5, it was a great meeting! I got home and my AH had made dinner and the little warmer lit. For Easter he had given me a candle warmer with lilac scented oil. Yesterday he purchased little scented wax not candles but I don't know what the name is. There is a point, p...	Jackie11	12	673	May 5, 2012 by Michelle814
	Update: back to court soon (Preview) After trying and failing to get another EPO [ emergency protection order, cop on duty was going on his weekend in 1/2 hour and made that clear ] my lawyer took the bull by the horns and asked for a temporary restraining order, which was approved and served. Now we have a court date for May 16 for the restrai...	rara avis	2	435	May 5, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Court is done (Preview) And all in all, things generally went my way. You never go to court expecting everything to go your way...just never happens. By and large the judge sided with me, and my payments to my ex will increase a small amount, but nowhere near what he was asking for. Also, he is now resonsible for paying 1/3 of...	stephaniej	6	474	May 5, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Maximum Stress (Preview) Man, my HP spoke to me loud and clear today. I have spent the whole week wound tight as a drum. Child support/attorneys fees payment hearing on Thursday with my ex (recall that I pay HIM child support and alimony, and now he wants me to pay his attorneys' fees for harassing me in court, all after I took a 65...	stephaniej	6	583	May 5, 2012 by sookie
	Invalidating feelings? (Preview) I grew up being told I didn't feel one way or the other in specific situations. My grandpa died I wasn't allowed to be sad. This was my perception of the situation as a kid, I was stuttered in how I grieved (My mother and grandma fell apart, there was no place for me TO fall apart in my minds eye). I wasn't a...	Pushka	15	958	May 5, 2012 by sookie
	Gossipy Supervisor (Preview) I'm just trying to get this message posted before I leave for work. I could use a little feedback. My boss has helped me to assist a team member. Although I don't work directly for him, and do work directly for her; he is management. He and I had a meeting yesterday and most of the hour was spent listeni...	tiredtonite	7	617	May 5, 2012 by tiredtonite
	Talking to my A about trust? (Preview) I have been feeling compelled to talk to my AH about my trust issues with him. He quit drinking after the DUI in February. We have had no intimacy in our marriage since then because I just plain old don't want to do 'it' with someone I don't trust yet. He hasn't approached me about the subject. He is so wrapp...	ilovedogs	9	760	May 5, 2012 by sookie
	New here...upset today (Preview) My family is so toxic...it's just so painful sometimes. My husband and I are both celebrating 30 years sober this year. However, I have lost 2 brothers to alcohol, and I have an older sister who is newly out of jail and in a homeless shelter in New England. Writing this stuns me. I simply can't believe it h...	tanyanubin	10	567	May 5, 2012 by Oksie
	My Dad had a drink (Preview) I am new here. Sorry for starting right out the gate with this but need advice fast. My parents are coming down for a five day visit and I found out last night my Dad decided he could drink once a week and he will be OK. My family has hit pre-deployment mode (military family) and I really do not want to have to...	Mom_of_ 3	6	608	May 4, 2012 by orchidlover
	Setting boundaries.... (Preview) Christmas before last....Christmas day....driving to Nanna's house with our SIX...children....I stayed home sick. Texts from 3 older kids. "SOMETHING" wrong with Daddy. He can't stay awake. Acting funny. Something wrong. When I realized..."HOW" bad. Ambien. Mixe...	Hope For Change	7	595	May 4, 2012 by canadianguy
	Fear is taking over, is it just cold feet???? (Preview) I live in a rented 2 bedroom house on Lake Michigan way out in the woods with only 2 neighbors that I can see through the trees. I have a great yard, private beach and well it is beautiful and serene way out here. It was the best place I could have found while seperating and later divorcing my AH. It has priva...	Breakingfree	8	656	May 4, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Sign Up for OP's for Weekend Meetings 9AM Eastern Sat/Sun and 7PM Eastern Sun (Preview) Sign up below for the date and time you can and will OP. Thank You ahead of time!!! You Are Appreciated for this!!! Saturday May 5 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ Sunday May 6 9 AM Eastern Facilitator:____________________ 7 PM Easter...	Grace7	0	432	May 4, 2012 by Grace7
	So much for hope (Preview) As mentioned in my previous post my A went over a week without drinking. It was not by choice, it was because he lost his wallet and ATM card. He had no money and I wouldn't give him any. He was starting to look better and he said he felt better. I was hopeful that this might be a new beginning for him. Silly me....	pineapple	10	1416	May 4, 2012 by Debilyn
	al anon strength (Preview) My exabf has been drinking for about ten weeks and we seperated. He has been really ill. I made the mistake of getting intimate with him about a week ago after a girls night out. He has now gone back to AA so he says and wants to talk. I do not want to talk I told him I made a mistake and apologised for sending...	Tracy	7	532	May 3, 2012 by hotrod
	2 Ways to Tell Your Story (Preview) I was viewing Oprah's most recent Life Class that is streamed online. One of her guests was Iyanla Vanzant. She said that there are two ways to tell your story. One keeps you in a rut, while the other one gets you into the flow of life. Rut Story: I loved Booboo (her word, not mine) I gave Booboo my all And...	GailMichelle	9	2067	May 3, 2012 by orchidlover
	What would you do? (Preview) My AH is flying back to MD today for his dad's funeral. My son and I are joining him tomorrow. AH had his license suspended for the month of May but hasn't gotten the notice from the DMV yet. He is going to rent a car in MD and I don't think he's going to have any problems because he's with the corporate plan...	ilovedogs	10	788	May 3, 2012 by Highlyfavored
	God's Timing (Preview) I have to say I have 3 situations that are looming at the moment where I am unsure where to go. I have given it to God (HP) and am trying to keep my hands out of them. 1 situation I'm going to let go of .. I know that God's timing may not be mine however it also means that things will be arranged the way I need them...	Pushka	8	579	May 3, 2012 by Breakingfree
	bad night (Preview) ok, so this is only my third time posting on here, I just don't know what else to do!! last night my a/h was drinking of course and he always wants to "talk" when he is drinking. he first started with our finances, then it was how he feels my mother has a negative inpact on our relationship (so not...	I am lost	9	887	May 3, 2012 by surfgirl123
	1, 2, 3 read me . . . (Preview) *Recovery Meditations ~ Birthright ~ One Day at a Time ~ April 23, 2012:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~RECOVERY MEDITATIONSOne Day at a TimeApril 23, 2012~ BIRTHRIGHT ~:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~I've continued to recognize the power individuals have to change* vir...	Fina	4	465	May 3, 2012 by Michelle814
	Hiking with HP (Preview) I went for a hike yesterday. 6 miles roundtrip on a mountain. It was a beautiful day but as I progressed up the mountain, fog blew in and clouded any view. The effect was surreal, but perfectly suited my place in time. I'm in that murky middle space in between the worlds of the past and the future. I do...	Dolly Llama	6	589	May 3, 2012 by Oksie
	Just Poppin In... (Preview) Hello All... been a Long Time... I am Still Survivin this Crazy World & Sometimes even have moments I Feel like I "Strivin", So I Suppose I am On the Correct Road Currently... I Still make my Meetings as Often as I can, Hope to make one tonight ;) Yea know Going to the my F2F Meetings & Se...	Jozie	2	509	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	Going to the big city today and scared (Preview) I need some well wishes, good thoughts and prayers for any who will offer them! I am going to a job interview and to look at 2 apartments. This move is 1 month away and I am just shocked I am taking my girls and I to a new town with nobody there that I know and I am staying in motion and feeling hopeful about it. Wh...	Breakingfree	14	799	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	AH's father passed away today (Preview) Ah's father passed away today at the wonderful old age of 89. Some of you may remember that my father passed away about 4.5 months ago, at the age of 62. We may all be going across the country for the funeral. I'm not sure how my son will handle this as his anxiety and stress levels really went through the...	ilovedogs	10	945	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	AH's Assumptions, in-laws, and progress (Preview) One of the most infuriating aspects of my marriage was that my AH assumes my intentions, thoughts, and feelings. He's also a Narcissist, and I'm sure a lot of this assuming is actually projection of his own thoughts. Sometimes, it feels like a manipulation, that I am supposed to jump in and correct h...	Dolly Llama	4	497	May 2, 2012 by orchidlover
	Did you know this came from him? (Preview) just sharing btw son sent me a message. We are now communicating.	Debilyn	5	582	May 2, 2012 by debbiems
	Quote in Today's Reminder, Courage to Change--A good one! (Preview) Life holds so much--so much to be happy about always. Most people ask for happiness on condition. Happiness can be felt only if you don't set conditions. -Artur Rubinstein That last sentence is very very powerful...	usedtobeanyer	7	1215	May 2, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Being heard (Preview) Being heard is incredibly important to me. I hate being misunderstood or disregarded when I try to express myself. I used a different tack today with my partner and feel I made some progress. I have been recognising the things I do that block my chances of being heard and taken seriously. For example my...	Tigger	5	462	May 2, 2012 by Oksie
	Disappointments (Preview) Disappointments all round again. When will it all stop? I guess when I choose to put myself first. Tracey	Tracey C	6	636	May 1, 2012 by Oksie
	thanks (Preview) Hi everyone I have been back for about a week. I haven't been on here as much as I was before I went away. I have spent quite a bit of time here today though. Since coming back from holidays.. I have felt a little tense for some reason. I guess I am waiting for him to go back to using after being 'good' while we...	Oksie	4	333	May 1, 2012 by Oksie
	it soo does hurt in alot of ways (Preview) its now been 9 days no contact with my a/d ex b/f he is still on my face book and we both was just on at the same time i wanted ,oh how i wanted to say something to him or him say something to me or just send me something but no not nothing i posted things and he posted a country song video ,i finally thought it best j...	silent	5	567	May 1, 2012 by Aloha
	I am never upset for the reason I think I am. (Preview) That is a quote from A Course in Miracles. This helps me so much when I'm fuming, frustrated, depressed. Makes me take a step back. Sometimes I am upset with myself for having been lax and letting a situation develop that could have been prevented. Sometimes it is displaced anger--it would be too sc...	Temple	8	579	May 1, 2012 by Catriona
	lead my first F2F meeting.... and.... dealing with unacceptable behavior (Preview) Boy it was fun and it went well! We have a fairly well structured group so it was fairly easy to do. I picked boundaries as my topic and did some readings from Hope for Today. Lots of great shares. It was nice to feel like I did a good job. It was nice to be in a roomfull of non judgemental people. Right befo...	amills4294	4	531	May 1, 2012 by amills4294
	me - one year on (Preview) One year ago...approximately.. I attended the office of a psychologist in tears, ready to kill myself and not knowing how my life had disintegrated to the point it was at. I thought I had it 'sorted'. Great husband, great life. Then... my husband relapsed into pot use/drug addiction. We were married...	Oksie	8	576	May 1, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Thoughts (Preview) Hey everyone. Hope you are all doing well. I spent my birthday and whole weekend in bed with a horrible flu and sinus infection that didn't help me too much because I didn't get to any meetings. I really needed them. It just gave me time to sit and think...and my thoughts hurt. I keep going to pick up my phon...	Corgi2	6	555	May 1, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Seeing the Train wreck (Preview) The train wreck is coming in ways that boggle the mind. I knew he was sick, I get that he's sick .. I just didn't realize how sick until two and two got put together. It's not that I didn't see it or get it .. what I get now is how fast the train is coming. I have the same feeling I had a few months before the DUI....	Pushka	9	659	May 1, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Relationship with drinker's over, but I still feel afraid... (Preview) Has anyone else had this problem, and if so, how did you deal with it? Briefly, I'd been in a long-distance relationship with my partner, decided to move the 200 miles to join him... and then the relationship really started going downhill. Basically I'd walked into a situation with a heavy drinker wi...	Nutbrownhare	7	616	May 1, 2012 by Dolly Llama
	The 10th step... (Preview) Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. See I know it. I also know how to do it. I have a loving, caring wife who doesn't refrain from giving me suggestions about self care. A couple of weeks ago I blinded myself in my right eye. I wasn't wearing safety glass...	Jerry F	10	1094	May 1, 2012 by orchidlover
	UNITY (Preview) Recovery Meditations ~ Unity ~ One Day At A Time ~ April 28, 2012 *:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:* RECOVERY MEDITATIONS One Day at a Time April 28, 2012 ~ UNITY ~ *:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:. .:~~:* Separate reeds are weak and easily broken; but bound together they are str...	Fina	2	386	Apr 30, 2012 by Fina
	Someone must relate? (Preview) For over 4 months now my son has not contacted me. We were as always ok and close. Then some dumb thing happened and he got upset as he thought I didn't see how upset he was. I just said no worries I will take care of it. That made him mad as he thought I was putting him down for being upset. It was over something i...	Debilyn	7	578	Apr 30, 2012 by Debilyn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.