Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

WorkingIt4Me · WorkingIt4Me

I often complain about ABF being selfish and I really struggle with this. I am supportive of his recovery and I understand that his recovery should come first (to him) and mine (to me). I have a really hard time dealing with his selfishness in other areas of his life. I need to vent for a minute. I've a...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

As I work the steps and I reveal to myself my own shortcomings and personality defects, I start questioning where I am going wrong. I worry that I am putting my son in the middle sometimes and I pray that God shows that to me and that he releases me from that issue. I have come to realize that my experience...

LiveLaughLove · LiveLaughLove

Okay, so I've drilled into my head the three C's. I realize that only the alcoholic can decide if and when they want to become sober and its not the responsibility of their significant other, family, friends, etc. to get them sober and keep them sober. However, is it unrealistic to think that those...

neshema2 · neshema2

Hey all My beloved younger sis is my bestest friend...yea, I love the two older ones big time, but me and "D" are soul mates She has even done research on anxiety and ptsd to help me and kinda acts as fill in sponsor for me when my sponsor is unavailable well, she is (adopted) but still native am...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I hope it is OK to do a cut/paste from another thread (I didn't want to go off on a tangent in their thread so am starting another thread). I was reading in the thread where someone was talking about having to write a victim impact statement, and someone posted this: "I wold give them a letter....ad...

Bettina · Bettina

When I was in the throes of struggling and suffering with my life I sought a lot of guidance. I thought nobody could suffer more than me. In my journey to find serenity and happiness It was suggested that I read the book "Man's search for meaning". It is written by Viktor E. Frankl. Its not a n...

To ALL my Alanon, MIP family members · neshema2

Saw this and thought of you guys

grateful2be · grateful2be

I've been waiting to see what would happen with regards to my son. I haven't called him since I noticed he was slurring his words and heard women's voices in the background about a week ago. Each day I checked in with my HP when it came close to the time I could call him at his assigned location. Each tim...

pinkchip · pinkchip

This week is high drama. Last week of work at a job where I have been working with therapeutic foster children for a long time. I have worked with the foster kids for quite some time and this set of foster parents even longer. For once, I'm not leaving because I hate the job or even because the pay is bad b...

In The Forest · In The Forest

I have written before about the fears I have in regard to my husband's drinking and the drinking that goes on in his family. They are all very high functioning which makes it very easy for him to sometimes act like I am some kind of prude. His brother is visiting this week with his wife and three kids. The f...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Hi all. I've been reading others' posts, and occasionally posting replies, but I haven't updated in awhile. My AH left two weeks ago to work several hundred miles away. The peace has been wonderful for me. He came back for less than 24 hours last weekend, to visit and to pick up his dog. During that l...

mercedes1959 · mercedes1959

My apologies to the newcomer to the meeting this morning, I hope you will come back, this is a really good group.

Aloha · Aloha

I had to take a personal inventory on the relationship I was in recently. I knew in my heart things were not really going to work out with this guy. There's nothing "wrong" with him - I felt so lucky to have attracted to me someone who didn't appear to have any substance abuse issues - the type of...

neshema2 · neshema2

Dunno why , I wake up....and I am doing my morning work on me (alanon) thining maybe I can sneak my grandson to pool b/4 daughter can come up w/something to bollix that up and I feel sad today Looking at what am I doing??? where am I going??? is it just gonna be struggling to find a bit more work and exist??...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Simply said, I want to break free from the madness money does to people. I am generally pretty good w/ money but today I feel the pressures of it! If anyone on here can relate to just being fed up w/ the burden money causes on them would they please speak up! I am still drowning on the 2nd time I have posted on t...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi Everyone I need help!! I talked to my son tonight and he is scared to death about being homeless. His father agreed to store his furniture and he is trying to find a place that will take him in but having a hard time. He hasn't asked for a thing just would like to see me this weekend. NO HE WILL NOT LIV...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Good morning everyone. Growing up in an alcoholic home, raised by a single AF, I never felt I had anyone to turn to. Noone was looking out for me or my interests. I've had to carve out my own life without anyone to look to for re-assurance. I've mentioned in the past here that life has been very mundane. I wa...

FAITH1988 · FAITH1988

Hi everyone, I hope this topic is ok on this forum. I have not been on the board in 5 or so days. My son 24 yrs old has a drinking problem and after 6 years sought help. I got to see him last Sunday I was nervous and somewhat withdrawn. Every Sunday is visitation and every time you go you have to watch a film and a c...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I am writing a paper on sexually transmitted diseases or to be correct STI's now. I was scrolling through different sites finding resources to cite and I fell across this page of babies and very young children and I am beyond sick and angry that these sites even exist. I already have a hard time seeing th...

neshema2 · neshema2

I did a post on my facebook re: the importance of eating clean, non processed foods and I happen to believe that GMO's are dangerous...I had IBS so bad, I was ready to drown me and when I went organic , "poof" IBS gone....coincidence??? I don't think so but that is MY take...and I put that on M...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Okay...no guessing...Jerry F loves HP gifts which are everywhere. These are "baby yellows" (of course) which were gifted to me by another member years ago and each time they bloom they bring beauty and magical memories and strong spiritual support. I cannot even come close to creat...

neshema2 · neshema2

Hey everyone I have quite a "file" on posts I got from other sites, or stuff from "hope for today" and Melodie Beattie stuff, and other authors, not sure they are CAL or not..... What are the rules for posting their works??? I want to ask b4 I mess up....Are there any rules or prec...

nomoretalkin · nomoretalkin

First off I will say that I'm tired, confused, and overwhelmed so I apologize if I don't make sense. I attended my first al anon meeting last week to try to get some help for some condependency in my 8 year long relationship with my boyfriend who I think has a chemical dependency on alcohol. More backgrou...

neshema2 · neshema2

I have heard about affirmations....Tried affirmations....Got books and read about them and tried again My inner child just does not buy it... Soooo what I am doing to try and get around it is just TREAT me better with a demonstration.....Its almost like if I say "i am good" or "I am a...

KLotus · KLotus

May be the hardest thing I've ever faced. I am back again, writing on the issue of grief over leaving my AH, and an abusive marriage. In my heart, I know I want more for myself, deserve more, and so does my child. God keeps moving me forward, somehow, even when I don't want to do this. I am re-working ste...

LunaSpeaks · LunaSpeaks

Hi everyone - I'm new to this kind of posting so forgive me if I sound awkward! I also have a large backstory, so I'm sorry if this turns out to be a novel! About six months ago, I found out the guy I was in a committed relationship (of four years) with had been hiding a growing rapidly larger by the minute dri...

SerenitySoon · SerenitySoon

Because I'm a people pleaser, don't want to rock the boat, but also don't trust myself, always second guessing,etc. I found myself out for dinner with my son who is in the throes of a separation.As an ACOA, I take full responsibility for all of my children's decisions, actions, reactions, problems, e...

PP · PP

Just when I think I am hot stuff, my HP shows me I am not. Like a fisherman, I bite the worm treat offered, get caught and the only way I can get reeled in and set free is to surrender...cause I am not the "big catch" I thought I was. So many opportunities to practice the steps and there is ne...

neshema2 · neshema2

I am sorta working on ALL of them, LOL....These little gems, in tandem w/the 12 steps are my "Life 101" How to manual on life...... Easy Does It First Things First How Important Is It? Just for Today Keep It Simple Keep an Open Mind Let Go and Let God Let It Begin With Me Listen & Learn Live...

Lyne · Lyne

Hello. I do feel a relief from the depression I've been in for the past few months. Nothing major has been resolved except that I'm working on myself with the help of alanon. Still have all the same problems with addicted family members but maybe I'm not so sucked in today. Less codependent? Don't...

SerenitySoon · SerenitySoon

child of an alcoholicmy alcoholic has been dead for 20 years59 years of agenewbie to AlAnonfear it's too late for happinessafraid of what I'll discover about what I did to my kids/my marriageno where to turn will I ever stop crying?

sweeetr · sweeetr

I am going to NC with my lil boy in the morning to see family. Im thinking too much (maybe??) There is no trust with me for my AH ...there is love ...but NO trust. You all know my story, every book I read knows my story.. An AH is pretty much similar qualities.. The dreaded merry go 'round. Ive read to let them h...

neshema2 · neshema2

Called daughter #2 this am to see if she wanted haircut.....She said she didn't want to today, sounded like she really was "occupied" so I said, "hey look, I only called you re: the haircut b/c I had promised to and no worries...its your hair, its your decision, just call me when and i...

tortuga · tortuga

It has been a Full year since I discovered the Al Anon program and MIP family, after a lot of struggle in codependency...and maybe even 'thanks' to the disease of alcohol, i have had my so called awakening. I experienced the misery this disease brings along, but at the same time I realized the importan...

AngieK · AngieK

It's been one month since my last post. One month since I've had to wonder if he's alive or dead, in jail, if someone else got hurt because of him. I opened myself up to family today, mine and his. It feels better to have had some kind, supportive, and constructive words sent my way. There is so much love in...

WorkingIt4Me · WorkingIt4Me

Hello everyone! This is my first time posting on the forum. I am new to Alanon and recovery. I have attended a few online meetings and one f2f meeting. I will be attending my second f2f meeting this evening (and am VERY excited about it!). Here's a little history about me....I grew up in a dysfunct...

SeekingSerenity237 · SeekingSerenity237

Hi, I'm new to this online forum and looking forward to gaining from everyone's experience, strength, & hope. I've been in alanon for about 1.5 yrs now and am working steps 1 & 2 with my sponsor. I'm making progress, but really struggle when my husband goes out of town for work. I've come to real...

WantingOut · WantingOut

Hi there, I'm new to Al-Anon. I have been a co-dependent to a HFA for several years. Believe it or not, it took me several years to figure out he was drinking as much as he was. The more I read, the more I realize that HFA's are really good at hiding their use. After we got married and I moved in, I started...

rehprof · rehprof

I'm approaching my 50th birthday, and I never dreamed I would be single at this age. I'm posting because I'm scared. I'm doing okay...and taking the kids to the beach today...but it's hard to really enjoy life...when in the back of my mind I am worrying about 1) making ends meet, 2) working so much that l...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Sunday morning. Woke up and changed into walking clothes. Went to the kitchen and picked up the car keys. Turned around and giggled them in the air in front of the pups and the riot and run for the back door was on!! They stood relatively quiet for their leashing and use their utmost best behavior a...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. I have been busy of late. Working on a class that involves internet coding. My brain is fried. Normally on Tuesday nights I attend a meeting but havn't the last 2 weeks in an effort to better balance my time. So, I'm going top use this...

PP · PP

Several days ago we had some dialogue here on verbal abuse. As life would have it, I had a loved one yell at me in a car on Sunday because they were frustrated no knowing where in the f_ _ _ _they were, on an on (I blocked out the barrage) and needed my direction. I continued to calmly give them directions an...

neshema2 · neshema2

I thought these were cool...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Help; I am drowning! I am not going to let my mom & husband's spats ruin my life & today. I just need to vent & as much help & support as I can get. I mean I don't have a clue sometimes what to do! You all seem to say what I need to hear. I am so disgusted w/ my mom & her antics. I have mentioned h...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Man alive my adrenaline is thumping through me and I am never going to get back to sleep now. I awoke to hear a girl screaming and I ran out my apartment to see a young guy trying to get back into a vehicle he was just apparently kicked out of. He was hitting someone inside through a window, which I thought was...

Gaby · Gaby

I pray and pray and working my program I must not be working it. I guess I am praying for a fast healing. I read and hear of others going through the same pain as I am with children and wives and husbands and nephews and nieces because there "A"s!!! And it breaks my heart. I am completely broken fr...

Jozie · Jozie

This Disease Has been! Since My AGram's Stroke on Mothers Day I have been Run Ragged... Today I had to take to the Doctors, and her Only comment when he leaves the Room! "When Can I Get Me a BIG Bottle?" She hasn't drank since her Stroke, but apparently its still Fresh in her Mind! She doesn't Re...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

im tired of talking..... my children are away for the month , this is my time for me to figure me out. not time to work on a marrage thats distroyed due to this illness. past 2 weeks my ah now 8 moths sober has been mean ,ugly, demeaning. he hates me. he hates everything about me. this is fact!!! he has t...

neshema2 · neshema2

Good morning everyone Today is raining, the flowers and the creatures get a respite from the heat and dryness and for them I am happy This am, I had a hell of a time getting my old dog up on her feet to go for restroom break outside I guess her days are numbered now, its gonna be sad when I have to "help her...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I went with a guy I have been dating on and off for the last year his teenagers and mine and I decided to just go and enjoy the music festival and flow with it. I was wanting to go for the last year and we had gone back and forth about whether we were going together or not. It was easier for me to go with him since he...

jbat · jbat

I have never been in a close relationship with someone going through AA, so this is all very new to me. Let me share my story. I recently starting dating a really great woman. We have a lot in common and get along great. While our relationship is still young, we seem to be making the natural progressio...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Verbal abuse is something most of us would probably agree is a constant as the disease progresses in our relationships. But, are there times when someone is courageous and caring enough to point something out about us that we don't want to hear or see because it wounds our pride and we call that verb...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I am feeling really sad and hurting pretty bad so I just want to do a post to let it out. Out of anger, and emotion on Tuesday I broke up with my boyfriend over something that he did which wasn't so serious that happened the night before. And a bit of a lie I realized he told on tuesday as well. Much worse things...

Bettina · Bettina

" Happiness in life is not determined by marriage. The secret to happiness lies in building a strong inner self , a self that no trial or hardship can diminish."

debhud · debhud

first of all, thank you all for your thoughtful responses. i appreciated all of your insight. after a short period of time, my husband apologized for the way he acted and we were able to talk about my fears with his driving in a healthy adult way. i have come to realize that he really wasn't aware of how fr...

sweeetr · sweeetr

Growing apart and only bothers me. I'm the only one who cares, well my lil boy trys to make everything better. If alcohol isn't an issue for him. Why doesn't he stop and quit lying etc I'm so lonely and tired of smelling the booze. He's in the same room and I'm crying over his drunk snoring. I know all I sa...

EverlyNeverly · EverlyNeverly

Hey All, This is my first post here. I'm reaching out in hopes this community can help me understand alcoholism better and learn how to help my boyfriend. We have been together for nearly 7 years and alcoholism has only been an issue for the past 1.5 - 2 years. He started drinking heavily after getting a D...

neshema2 · neshema2

Hey alanoners Met my granddaughter, Janet and she is a beauty...Her mom was happy to see me and its so funny I am gushing over the grand baby and "C" got a teeny bit , like "I want your attention and hugs, too, Mom" So I made amends to her and agreed that she needed love and attention t...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Blessed Sunday All I feel bad I haven't been here for a few days but I have been so busy with work, the work on my home and making a few more meetings in the last week. I quit my counselor and picked up meetings instead. I felt I was at a point in my program that Al-anon was enough and why spend so much money an...

Bettina · Bettina

" If you dig where you're at , you'll find gold."

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Seems so small but... (Preview) I often complain about ABF being selfish and I really struggle with this. I am supportive of his recovery and I understand that his recovery should come first (to him) and mine (to me). I have a really hard time dealing with his selfishness in other areas of his life. I need to vent for a minute. I've a...	WorkingIt4Me	14	437	Jul 20, 2013 by neshema2
	Learning about my part (Preview) As I work the steps and I reveal to myself my own shortcomings and personality defects, I start questioning where I am going wrong. I worry that I am putting my son in the middle sometimes and I pray that God shows that to me and that he releases me from that issue. I have come to realize that my experience...	ilovedogs	10	514	Jul 20, 2013 by ilovedogs
	I just need to voice my frustrations (Preview) Okay, so I've drilled into my head the three C's. I realize that only the alcoholic can decide if and when they want to become sober and its not the responsibility of their significant other, family, friends, etc. to get them sober and keep them sober. However, is it unrealistic to think that those...	LiveLaughLove	8	393	Jul 20, 2013 by LiveLaughLove
	A boundary AND an amend to younger and wonderful SIS (Preview) Hey all My beloved younger sis is my bestest friend...yea, I love the two older ones big time, but me and "D" are soul mates She has even done research on anxiety and ptsd to help me and kinda acts as fill in sponsor for me when my sponsor is unavailable well, she is (adopted) but still native am...	neshema2	1	295	Jul 20, 2013 by neshema2
	Writing a letter telling people how their "deeds" have harmed (Preview) I hope it is OK to do a cut/paste from another thread (I didn't want to go off on a tangent in their thread so am starting another thread). I was reading in the thread where someone was talking about having to write a victim impact statement, and someone posted this: "I wold give them a letter....ad...	lgnutah	8	470	Jul 20, 2013 by Bettina
	the bigger picture (Preview) When I was in the throes of struggling and suffering with my life I sought a lot of guidance. I thought nobody could suffer more than me. In my journey to find serenity and happiness It was suggested that I read the book "Man's search for meaning". It is written by Viktor E. Frankl. Its not a n...	Bettina	13	452	Jul 20, 2013 by neshema2
	To ALL my Alanon, MIP family members (Preview) Saw this and thought of you guys	neshema2	6	347	Jul 20, 2013 by Lyne
	Update on my son (Preview) I've been waiting to see what would happen with regards to my son. I haven't called him since I noticed he was slurring his words and heard women's voices in the background about a week ago. Each day I checked in with my HP when it came close to the time I could call him at his assigned location. Each tim...	grateful2be	16	496	Jul 20, 2013 by neshema2
	Emotionally amped (Preview) This week is high drama. Last week of work at a job where I have been working with therapeutic foster children for a long time. I have worked with the foster kids for quite some time and this set of foster parents even longer. For once, I'm not leaving because I hate the job or even because the pay is bad b...	pinkchip	13	461	Jul 20, 2013 by neshema2
	Kids And the Messages They Get (Preview) I have written before about the fears I have in regard to my husband's drinking and the drinking that goes on in his family. They are all very high functioning which makes it very easy for him to sometimes act like I am some kind of prude. His brother is visiting this week with his wife and three kids. The f...	In The Forest	14	563	Jul 20, 2013 by neshema2
	Update (Preview) Hi all. I've been reading others' posts, and occasionally posting replies, but I haven't updated in awhile. My AH left two weeks ago to work several hundred miles away. The peace has been wonderful for me. He came back for less than 24 hours last weekend, to visit and to pick up his dog. During that l...	stephaniej	4	234	Jul 19, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Newcomer at the meeting this morning (Preview) My apologies to the newcomer to the meeting this morning, I hope you will come back, this is a really good group.	mercedes1959	0	236	Jul 19, 2013 by mercedes1959
	Guilt is not conducive to self-love. (Preview) I had to take a personal inventory on the relationship I was in recently. I knew in my heart things were not really going to work out with this guy. There's nothing "wrong" with him - I felt so lucky to have attracted to me someone who didn't appear to have any substance abuse issues - the type of...	Aloha	9	346	Jul 19, 2013 by neshema2
	Feeling kinda of Crappy (Preview) Dunno why , I wake up....and I am doing my morning work on me (alanon) thining maybe I can sneak my grandson to pool b/4 daughter can come up w/something to bollix that up and I feel sad today Looking at what am I doing??? where am I going??? is it just gonna be struggling to find a bit more work and exist??...	neshema2	13	535	Jul 19, 2013 by neshema2
	I want to break free! (Preview) Simply said, I want to break free from the madness money does to people. I am generally pretty good w/ money but today I feel the pressures of it! If anyone on here can relate to just being fed up w/ the burden money causes on them would they please speak up! I am still drowning on the 2nd time I have posted on t...	Hoot Nanny	4	262	Jul 19, 2013 by grateful2be
	Help Needed (Preview) Hi Everyone I need help!! I talked to my son tonight and he is scared to death about being homeless. His father agreed to store his furniture and he is trying to find a place that will take him in but having a hard time. He hasn't asked for a thing just would like to see me this weekend. NO HE WILL NOT LIV...	Cathyinaz	22	541	Jul 19, 2013 by Jerry F
	I had a bit of a freak out with myself last night (Preview) Good morning everyone. Growing up in an alcoholic home, raised by a single AF, I never felt I had anyone to turn to. Noone was looking out for me or my interests. I've had to carve out my own life without anyone to look to for re-assurance. I've mentioned in the past here that life has been very mundane. I wa...	slogan_jim	12	414	Jul 19, 2013 by AngieP
	I have to write a victim impact letter to my son to read to him before he graduates rehab (Preview) Hi everyone, I hope this topic is ok on this forum. I have not been on the board in 5 or so days. My son 24 yrs old has a drinking problem and after 6 years sought help. I got to see him last Sunday I was nervous and somewhat withdrawn. Every Sunday is visitation and every time you go you have to watch a film and a c...	FAITH1988	11	4319	Jul 19, 2013 by neshema2
	I am so upset, I fell upon a pedophile site last night writing a paper (Preview) I am writing a paper on sexually transmitted diseases or to be correct STI's now. I was scrolling through different sites finding resources to cite and I fell across this page of babies and very young children and I am beyond sick and angry that these sites even exist. I already have a hard time seeing th...	Breakingfree	11	452	Jul 19, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	LOL I think I brought Alanon to my Facebook (Preview) I did a post on my facebook re: the importance of eating clean, non processed foods and I happen to believe that GMO's are dangerous...I had IBS so bad, I was ready to drown me and when I went organic , "poof" IBS gone....coincidence??? I don't think so but that is MY take...and I put that on M...	neshema2	8	430	Jul 18, 2013 by neshema2
	The new Avatar... (Preview) Okay...no guessing...Jerry F loves HP gifts which are everywhere. These are "baby yellows" (of course) which were gifted to me by another member years ago and each time they bloom they bring beauty and magical memories and strong spiritual support. I cannot even come close to creat...	Jerry F	12	352	Jul 18, 2013 by el-cee
	WHAT is the rule for posting posts written by other authors i.e. Melodie Beattie, et al?????? (Preview) Hey everyone I have quite a "file" on posts I got from other sites, or stuff from "hope for today" and Melodie Beattie stuff, and other authors, not sure they are CAL or not..... What are the rules for posting their works??? I want to ask b4 I mess up....Are there any rules or prec...	neshema2	27	556	Jul 18, 2013 by neshema2
	Help FOR a counselor: Is he an alcoholic? (Preview) First off I will say that I'm tired, confused, and overwhelmed so I apologize if I don't make sense. I attended my first al anon meeting last week to try to get some help for some condependency in my 8 year long relationship with my boyfriend who I think has a chemical dependency on alcohol. More backgrou...	nomoretalkin	22	656	Jul 18, 2013 by neshema2
	why doesn't my inner child "buy" affirmations (Preview) I have heard about affirmations....Tried affirmations....Got books and read about them and tried again My inner child just does not buy it... Soooo what I am doing to try and get around it is just TREAT me better with a demonstration.....Its almost like if I say "i am good" or "I am a...	neshema2	21	556	Jul 18, 2013 by neshema2
	Letting go - (Preview) May be the hardest thing I've ever faced. I am back again, writing on the issue of grief over leaving my AH, and an abusive marriage. In my heart, I know I want more for myself, deserve more, and so does my child. God keeps moving me forward, somehow, even when I don't want to do this. I am re-working ste...	KLotus	9	536	Jul 18, 2013 by neshema2
	Betrayal... A Novel of a Post. Please help (Preview) Hi everyone - I'm new to this kind of posting so forgive me if I sound awkward! I also have a large backstory, so I'm sorry if this turns out to be a novel! About six months ago, I found out the guy I was in a committed relationship (of four years) with had been hiding a growing rapidly larger by the minute dri...	LunaSpeaks	4	452	Jul 18, 2013 by pinkchip
	The Courage to Change the Things I Can (Preview) Because I'm a people pleaser, don't want to rock the boat, but also don't trust myself, always second guessing,etc. I found myself out for dinner with my son who is in the throes of a separation.As an ACOA, I take full responsibility for all of my children's decisions, actions, reactions, problems, e...	SerenitySoon	4	271	Jul 18, 2013 by neshema2
	Hot Stuff, huh? (Preview) Just when I think I am hot stuff, my HP shows me I am not. Like a fisherman, I bite the worm treat offered, get caught and the only way I can get reeled in and set free is to surrender...cause I am not the "big catch" I thought I was. So many opportunities to practice the steps and there is ne...	PP	8	323	Jul 18, 2013 by neshema2
	Some slogans (Preview) I am sorta working on ALL of them, LOL....These little gems, in tandem w/the 12 steps are my "Life 101" How to manual on life...... Easy Does It First Things First How Important Is It? Just for Today Keep It Simple Keep an Open Mind Let Go and Let God Let It Begin With Me Listen & Learn Live...	neshema2	6	408	Jul 18, 2013 by grateful2be
	feel better today (Preview) Hello. I do feel a relief from the depression I've been in for the past few months. Nothing major has been resolved except that I'm working on myself with the help of alanon. Still have all the same problems with addicted family members but maybe I'm not so sucked in today. Less codependent? Don't...	Lyne	9	340	Jul 18, 2013 by grateful2be
	Tiny Steps (Preview) child of an alcoholicmy alcoholic has been dead for 20 years59 years of agenewbie to AlAnonfear it's too late for happinessafraid of what I'll discover about what I did to my kids/my marriageno where to turn will I ever stop crying?	SerenitySoon	14	390	Jul 18, 2013 by grateful2be
	well (Preview) I am going to NC with my lil boy in the morning to see family. Im thinking too much (maybe??) There is no trust with me for my AH ...there is love ...but NO trust. You all know my story, every book I read knows my story.. An AH is pretty much similar qualities.. The dreaded merry go 'round. Ive read to let them h...	sweeetr	2	249	Jul 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	I'll take even the little breakthroughs (Preview) Called daughter #2 this am to see if she wanted haircut.....She said she didn't want to today, sounded like she really was "occupied" so I said, "hey look, I only called you re: the haircut b/c I had promised to and no worries...its your hair, its your decision, just call me when and i...	neshema2	2	287	Jul 17, 2013 by hotrod
	passing it on- in service to others: BE HAPPY! (Preview) It has been a Full year since I discovered the Al Anon program and MIP family, after a lot of struggle in codependency...and maybe even 'thanks' to the disease of alcohol, i have had my so called awakening. I experienced the misery this disease brings along, but at the same time I realized the importan...	tortuga	7	333	Jul 17, 2013 by neshema2
	it's been one month (Preview) It's been one month since my last post. One month since I've had to wonder if he's alive or dead, in jail, if someone else got hurt because of him. I opened myself up to family today, mine and his. It feels better to have had some kind, supportive, and constructive words sent my way. There is so much love in...	AngieK	7	256	Jul 17, 2013 by Jerry F
	New and Ready (Preview) Hello everyone! This is my first time posting on the forum. I am new to Alanon and recovery. I have attended a few online meetings and one f2f meeting. I will be attending my second f2f meeting this evening (and am VERY excited about it!). Here's a little history about me....I grew up in a dysfunct...	WorkingIt4Me	5	380	Jul 17, 2013 by Jerry F
	Learning selfcare and letting go of jealousy (Preview) Hi, I'm new to this online forum and looking forward to gaining from everyone's experience, strength, & hope. I've been in alanon for about 1.5 yrs now and am working steps 1 & 2 with my sponsor. I'm making progress, but really struggle when my husband goes out of town for work. I've come to real...	SeekingSerenity237	7	571	Jul 17, 2013 by neshema2
	New to Al-Anon (Preview) Hi there, I'm new to Al-Anon. I have been a co-dependent to a HFA for several years. Believe it or not, it took me several years to figure out he was drinking as much as he was. The more I read, the more I realize that HFA's are really good at hiding their use. After we got married and I moved in, I started...	WantingOut	5	400	Jul 17, 2013 by neshema2
	50 is looming (Preview) I'm approaching my 50th birthday, and I never dreamed I would be single at this age. I'm posting because I'm scared. I'm doing okay...and taking the kids to the beach today...but it's hard to really enjoy life...when in the back of my mind I am worrying about 1) making ends meet, 2) working so much that l...	rehprof	18	570	Jul 17, 2013 by bud
	Spiritual Dimensions (Preview) Sunday morning. Woke up and changed into walking clothes. Went to the kitchen and picked up the car keys. Turned around and giggled them in the air in front of the pups and the riot and run for the back door was on!! They stood relatively quiet for their leashing and use their utmost best behavior a...	Jerry F	8	416	Jul 17, 2013 by bud
	Random Al-anon related musings (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. I have been busy of late. Working on a class that involves internet coding. My brain is fried. Normally on Tuesday nights I attend a meeting but havn't the last 2 weeks in an effort to better balance my time. So, I'm going top use this...	slogan_jim	2	320	Jul 17, 2013 by neshema2
	More on Verbal Abuse (Preview) Several days ago we had some dialogue here on verbal abuse. As life would have it, I had a loved one yell at me in a car on Sunday because they were frustrated no knowing where in the f_ _ _ _they were, on an on (I blocked out the barrage) and needed my direction. I continued to calmly give them directions an...	PP	9	549	Jul 17, 2013 by hotrod
	12 steps to self care (Preview) I thought these were cool...	neshema2	5	390	Jul 17, 2013 by afglin
	family related(maybe not alanon related) (Preview) Help; I am drowning! I am not going to let my mom & husband's spats ruin my life & today. I just need to vent & as much help & support as I can get. I mean I don't have a clue sometimes what to do! You all seem to say what I need to hear. I am so disgusted w/ my mom & her antics. I have mentioned h...	Hoot Nanny	3	224	Jul 17, 2013 by afglin
	I just watched 2 drunk 20 something year olds try to kill each other just now and (Preview) Man alive my adrenaline is thumping through me and I am never going to get back to sleep now. I awoke to hear a girl screaming and I ran out my apartment to see a young guy trying to get back into a vehicle he was just apparently kicked out of. He was hitting someone inside through a window, which I thought was...	Breakingfree	8	409	Jul 16, 2013 by Debilyn
	Stressed and depressed yesterday and today.. (Preview) I pray and pray and working my program I must not be working it. I guess I am praying for a fast healing. I read and hear of others going through the same pain as I am with children and wives and husbands and nephews and nieces because there "A"s!!! And it breaks my heart. I am completely broken fr...	Gaby	7	485	Jul 16, 2013 by neshema2
	What a Whirl Wind! (Preview) This Disease Has been! Since My AGram's Stroke on Mothers Day I have been Run Ragged... Today I had to take to the Doctors, and her Only comment when he leaves the Room! "When Can I Get Me a BIG Bottle?" She hasn't drank since her Stroke, but apparently its still Fresh in her Mind! She doesn't Re...	Jozie	5	405	Jul 16, 2013 by Jozie
	i hate the disease. (Preview) im tired of talking..... my children are away for the month , this is my time for me to figure me out. not time to work on a marrage thats distroyed due to this illness. past 2 weeks my ah now 8 moths sober has been mean ,ugly, demeaning. he hates me. he hates everything about me. this is fact!!! he has t...	Ms co-dependent	12	764	Jul 16, 2013 by Breakingfree
	GOOD MORNING Alanoners (Preview) Good morning everyone Today is raining, the flowers and the creatures get a respite from the heat and dryness and for them I am happy This am, I had a hell of a time getting my old dog up on her feet to go for restroom break outside I guess her days are numbered now, its gonna be sad when I have to "help her...	neshema2	5	294	Jul 16, 2013 by Jerry F
	Went camping for 4 days and used my tools through the 4 day Christian camp big time (Preview) I went with a guy I have been dating on and off for the last year his teenagers and mine and I decided to just go and enjoy the music festival and flow with it. I was wanting to go for the last year and we had gone back and forth about whether we were going together or not. It was easier for me to go with him since he...	Breakingfree	4	332	Jul 16, 2013 by Jerry F
	New to this! (Preview) I have never been in a close relationship with someone going through AA, so this is all very new to me. Let me share my story. I recently starting dating a really great woman. We have a lot in common and get along great. While our relationship is still young, we seem to be making the natural progressio...	jbat	3	336	Jul 16, 2013 by Jerry F
	Is it verbal abuse or is it truth? (Preview) Verbal abuse is something most of us would probably agree is a constant as the disease progresses in our relationships. But, are there times when someone is courageous and caring enough to point something out about us that we don't want to hear or see because it wounds our pride and we call that verb...	grateful2be	29	1191	Jul 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	Broken Heart. (Preview) I am feeling really sad and hurting pretty bad so I just want to do a post to let it out. Out of anger, and emotion on Tuesday I broke up with my boyfriend over something that he did which wasn't so serious that happened the night before. And a bit of a lie I realized he told on tuesday as well. Much worse things...	giraffe13	15	618	Jul 16, 2013 by Lyne
	Happiness! (Preview) " Happiness in life is not determined by marriage. The secret to happiness lies in building a strong inner self , a self that no trial or hardship can diminish."	Bettina	8	328	Jul 16, 2013 by Bettina
	update about driving cross country. leaving in 2 weeks!! (Preview) first of all, thank you all for your thoughtful responses. i appreciated all of your insight. after a short period of time, my husband apologized for the way he acted and we were able to talk about my fears with his driving in a healthy adult way. i have come to realize that he really wasn't aware of how fr...	debhud	6	251	Jul 15, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	I'm back - falling apart again (Preview) Growing apart and only bothers me. I'm the only one who cares, well my lil boy trys to make everything better. If alcohol isn't an issue for him. Why doesn't he stop and quit lying etc I'm so lonely and tired of smelling the booze. He's in the same room and I'm crying over his drunk snoring. I know all I sa...	sweeetr	7	479	Jul 15, 2013 by neshema2
	Boyfriend Accepts He Has a Problem, Doesn't Know How to Stop Drinking alcoholism alcohol help girlfriend support addiction next steps therapy treatment detox rehab (Preview) Hey All, This is my first post here. I'm reaching out in hopes this community can help me understand alcoholism better and learn how to help my boyfriend. We have been together for nearly 7 years and alcoholism has only been an issue for the past 1.5 - 2 years. He started drinking heavily after getting a D...	EverlyNeverly	8	8554	Jul 15, 2013 by neshema2
	Met my granddaughter--Day went well (Preview) Hey alanoners Met my granddaughter, Janet and she is a beauty...Her mom was happy to see me and its so funny I am gushing over the grand baby and "C" got a teeny bit , like "I want your attention and hugs, too, Mom" So I made amends to her and agreed that she needed love and attention t...	neshema2	10	439	Jul 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	Busy Busy Busy (Preview) Blessed Sunday All I feel bad I haven't been here for a few days but I have been so busy with work, the work on my home and making a few more meetings in the last week. I quit my counselor and picked up meetings instead. I felt I was at a point in my program that Al-anon was enough and why spend so much money an...	Cathyinaz	6	316	Jul 15, 2013 by neshema2
	Old Wise Japanese saying: (Preview) " If you dig where you're at , you'll find gold."	Bettina	5	2967	Jul 15, 2013 by neshema2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.