Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Venera · Venera

So my AH displayed his drinking problem infront of my mom last week (not going to work for 3 days and just drinking home and watching tv, driving to get more booze, etc, though not disturbing anybody, bringing food for lunch for all a few times, not putting tv loud, etc). My mom asked me a lot of questions a...

John · John

It's Sunday morning. The sun is peeking through the trees that surround my home, My dogs have all been outside and done their thing. Now I sit here with a cup of coffee and I kinda giggle at myself. Last night I got a call from my son. He, his girlfriend, another young lady friend of hers, and her mother...

neshema2 · neshema2

I had a hard time accepting being powerless...then I came , through program, to understood that I am powerless over OTHER people or places and things, but not helpless about can I take care of me anyway??? Sure I can.... Maybe this will help sort out the difference....

Tiff5484 · Tiff5484

I am new in Alanon, I started out doing one meeting a week. Which in my situation was not enough, so I found another meeting to go to and now I go to 3 meetings a week and plus I get on here now so I go to one everyday. I got involved in Alanon because I have a very unmanageable life and I do not have a relationship w...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Acceptance is really where I struggle. I tend to look at my AH and remember who he was, who we were, and I want that back as I'm sure he does, too. Yet, he's changed, he's started drinking, he's gotten a DUI, he lies now about stupid stuff, he wants me to just blow off unacceptable behavior. And, I have ch...

magazine · magazine

So I attended my first al anon meeting. I didn't know what to expect....the group was so wonderful and warm. One of the speakers read out her story (1 year member) and from her first line to the last it could have been my story. They encouraged me to keep coming back which I will. I felt empowered by the...

Pushka · Pushka

Ok .. sooo .. I'm dealing with court stuff and for the LIFE of me couldn't figure out why the STBAX's arrest wasn't listed on the county website .. it's amazing what is listed that is considered public record. Our little town lists more than most so it's informative. Yes, this is going to sound so unhea...

Pushka · Pushka

The kids and I had a great day. I worked around the house a LOT because it's a mess .. that's ok .. it didn't get here over night and it's going to take another full day of working to get it looking better. The house is a complete reflection of my brain at the moment .. kind of not pretty. I was even able to get...

neshema2 · neshema2

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I was going to go to a AA open meeting tonight but I was asked to go to a BBQ going away party so I said yes. I thought I just needed to get out and be with people that are smiling and having some fun. Had a nice time and I'm tired now and ready to relax and just watch some TV. Good night all......see you tomorro...

Jerry F · Jerry F

You must give it away. That lesson remains a large part of my serenity and my sobriety. This was a "higher education" sponsor - sponsee work event from thought to action and of course I attended all classes for fear of the consequences of if I didn't. Aloha MIP Family. My wife and I jus...

oldergal · oldergal

Daily renewal is a statement about how you wish your day, and ultimately your life, to unfold. It is your soul speaking to your heart, your heart translating to your mind, and your mind giving your body directions. It is ultimately an expression of self-love! -Bob Greene

qwerty49 · qwerty49

I'm really struggling to cope with my mums drinking. She keeps letting me down, dismissing me, ignoring me when i try to tell her i'm upset and I feel angry about it so much, and another part of me feels so much emotion and love. She's been drinking now for over 30 years, but used to eat healthy and now she st...

neshema2 · neshema2

I was on step 4, but in the light of latest events, I am BACK on the hardest step for me...STEP 3 on STEP 3..............I "made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of my Higher Power AS I UNDERSTAND IT...." I once told a newbie, this was my rendition of STEP 3......imagine ly...

FAITH1988 · FAITH1988

Hi Everyone, Yesterday my son graduated rehab all of his peers in the house (small facility-25addicts) each spoke to my son. First the counselors, all recovered addicts or alcoholics, who decided to make saving those like themselves a life goal. My son upon release was there 30 days. So no other male...

Gaby · Gaby

I just want to say that I will be praying for all of us that are and have lived in chaos caused by the ones that we love due to there choices of addictions.. We all need serenity, and our higher power to touch us so we know we will be ok. God bless you all and many prayers will be said in a very spiritual place that...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

I been to every meeting this week. I'm working hard . My Sponser can't guide me anymore things have taken place on her side and can't work with me. I'm now on my own. My 9 month ah husband moved back I'm the house . He is better he wants to help me get better soon. Before he told me he was moving back in he stated h...

Phoenix7 · Phoenix7

So here we go again - he's drying out after a week-long binge of whiskey, aggressive, obnoxious, hateful behavior to others and the falling-down-drunk injuries to himself. It's a cycle that happens every few weeks or months, depending on circumstances. It seems to have been made worse after a few mo...

grateful2be · grateful2be

My daughter called me this evening. A co-worker of hers ran into my son putting in job apps. He is staying right now in another place where there is more supervision and less temptation. It's been a bumpy road for me this week. I've hit some ruts and I've missed some, too. I think he might have called...

FAITH1988 · FAITH1988

This is our final draft of the letter to our son in REHAB at his retreat next week. I want to thank all of you for the suggestions. This is the letter we are going with, I feel calmness with this letter. I will need to read it 200 times so I am able to deliver it to our son in public with my husband by my side withou...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I just don't know but I'm having a really hard time dealing with this. I won't do anything stupid like calling him because I just know that would start this mess all over again. I have to believe he will find his way and seek help. I fear him being on the streets but I also have to remember he did it not me...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I sure felt a lot standing & walking at the relay for life for cancer. I didn't actually participate in the relay but I felt like it was what I needed. My dad died of cancer. We celebrated his memory & I feel like I can let go of a little more of my grief. I can go through all of my problems or anxieties b...

neshema2 · neshema2

I thought of you when I saw this............feel better, nice lady....Life is out there waiting for you to shine your light in it

mallie · mallie

Have no idea where to begin -- so I am just going to write about the present moment. My boyfriend of nearly 8 years - we have lived together, he has lost jobs continuously for years - and I lost my job a few times NOT for drinking, because I do not drink, but for me, if was for unfortunate lay-offs from very go...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I love to get up early before the kids and have some alone time to spend with God, my three daily readers ~ Hope for Today, Courage to Change, and One Day at a Time and my coffee. I have my best days when I start out just like that and have my attitude of gratitude on first thing and then everything that comes...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Had a great day...got my work done and even volunteered some stuff to some other guys who work there...Good day; pleasant weather, work details done in rythym and with smiles. I like when life clicks like that makes it soooo easy to skip and play and laugh until.....get to the credit union and park m...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Got a new puppy and the girls are so happy about it. All my friends say are you crazy you live in an apartment and you are so busy, it's the last thing you need, blah, blah, blah. I laugh and say it won't affect you and I can handle it. I had to discuss it in length with my 15 year old and even my exAh, because the d...

Mrs t · Mrs t

Just wanted to share where I am under a different thread rather than the original "am desperate" post. Simply because .... I am no longer desperate so dad has turned a real corner health wise - up walking for the first time in over 10 days - no more paranoid chat about the doctors or nurses b...

neshema2 · neshema2

Bettina wisely said on her post ****"Grateful, how about we just don't attach ourselves to sufferingand decide to not suffer ? That's what I attain to do, but we can't avoid it all, we wouldnt be human, but we can lighten it. ****** Well, I try to broadcast on my facebook to help find homes for ...

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

I've spent most of the day reading, praying, meditating and on this board. I'm trying to mind my own business, my a/a daughter who I had such a melt down with last month when she didn't get her son's ssa check. Since then her 28 y.o. son is staying with her and she is supposely trying to get rid of her bf. H...

wings of a dove · wings of a dove

I'm so tired and everyday I think how much longer do I have to suffer? My AH is very abusive emotionally and he is drunk every single day. No one should have to live this way. I have some serious health issues and the stress of him is killing me. Oh how I want out but my income doesn't give me enough to even pay t...

ARod · ARod

I desperately need some advice. I feel like I am drowning in misery, everyday is a constant fight. Both of my parents were heroin addicts, my brother turned out to be a meth user and my 16 year old son is currently in recovery for alcohol. My son is doing really well and has taught me so much through his r...

Pushka · Pushka

I am laughing at myself really .. I had the opportunity to hear my sponsor speak for the first time at an open AA meeting last night and OMGosh .. I'm SOOOO glad I went!! I'm struggling with the face to face meetings at the moment, because of a person and me trying to learn how not to shut people out when I hur...

pinkchip · pinkchip

This is my issue for sure. Everytime I read about how abusive, arrogant, and jerky some of your qualifiers act, I get mad. I can preach detachment and all that, but I don't really walk in your shoes at this moment. When I walked away from my alcoholic ex, it was because I was also a drunk and I was rejecti...

neshema2 · neshema2

With all thats hit of late, I am not the only one having "trials" and so I don't feel the victim...Its just LIFE.....I find that if I reach out to others , when I am in pain, and I do "service" , I FEEL better...its like service makes my stuff less bad or released from me enough to find t...

neshema2 · neshema2

It has been a "Rough" return to program...I saw some old negative stuff try and sneak in a return....Since my return, I have had to battle w/some stubborn old patterns that came back....Then Got sick w/ a horrible attack of IBS....THEN yesterday, my friends and I who rescue horses togethe...

Bettina · Bettina

"It is senseless to blame others or your environment for your miseries. Change begins from the moment you muster the courage to act. When you change, the environment will change. The power for change is found nowhere but within our own life.". Ikeda -- Edited by Bettina on Friday 2nd of A...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I am really scared to even post this here. I have no idea what kind of response I will get. But because this has always been a safe place to share, I want to put this on the board.

For those who don't know I broke up with my Abf a month ago, and I really worked my program for 9 mo. prior to that-- so I could g...

tortuga · tortuga

This was the moment again where I had to reset my boundaries, and with that developed a scream of my needs. I'm afraid ego is raising its head here, first I go months without and then I shout out loud in a moment of explosion. my question to you: is this too much to ask? I'm a bit out of balance i guess, having d...

Bettina · Bettina

"Suffering only gets worse when we try to run from it, rather then face it."

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

I attend meetings one time a week here and boy, tonight did I ever need it. My AH has been struggling lately, which sets off my triggers. I know better than to get into his business...but sometimes, it is SO hard to keep my mouth shut!!!! I have been working really hard at detaching from it... It's has been...

liliana223 · liliana223

Hi group, Thanks for listening. I am new to this site, and new to even knowing that my partner (O) is an alcoholic. He only admitted in 2 and half weeks ago when he went to his first AA meeing, the day after his last binge. I went with him to that meeting and several others thanks to the openminded group who h...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I truly think now I will be going through a new stage. I think I will not be in contact with my son because he has let go. He had quit talking to everyone in this life and mom is the last one. I will give him up forever if it means recovery but I will also have some sad feelings going forward. I'm going to have t...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi All: Thank you for the kind responses to my post yesterday. I am so grateful to this site and all of you who share your ESH. I know I have made some progress but the conversations I have had w AH recently make me realize I am still not truly accepting that what I am saying, doing or not has no affect on him a...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Yesterday was not a good day when it came to my job. I was not invited to the meetings and was out of the loop. Next thing I know two of the people in the meeting comes to me and asks me to start looking for a consultant then a new employee for MRP. Inventory is a mess and needs correction asap. Well mine a...

oldergal · oldergal

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4my2kids · 4my2kids

Yes that was so hard to type, but its coming to that. Even ex's mom thinks so. I will be getting daughter (10) into counseling, hopefully this week. But I fear their dads end is near and I just don't know how to prepare her (son is 21 and in army out of state and I don't want to upset him with things he can't cont...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I will rest for another day & then post how letting go went. I just want to say that as I will not let myself fall apart. Kathleen

wornoutmrsfixit · wornoutmrsfixit

Well, he went to court on Friday for his reckless driving charge. He went alone. His sister acted as his attorney but she wanted him to receive the restrictions he got. He was ordered to install the ignition lock system on his truck so that it will not start unless he is 0.00 BAC. With every failed readin...

neshema2 · neshema2

I come here, read posts...try to give useful ES&H and I am thinking I know I am Coda, I know I am an Acoa, and I THINK I am alanoner as well.... I do hope I fit in here in some way ...I know my posts are sometimes long...I cut to the chase...I am about as open as the grand canyon, I don't even try to hide any...

Venera · Venera

I feel i know the answer, but I do want somebody to agree or disagree. We live far away from my family (parents and brother's family). So nobody knew my husband had a drinking problem. This summer my mom visited us for two months with my brother's daughter, and for the first time they saw my husband drinki...

mercedes1959 · mercedes1959

I will chair this morning if there is no chair

AngieK · AngieK

I can't begin to know how to thank all of you for taking the time to share with me after my venting last night. I was a wreck and in fact there was nothing to worry about, everything was okay, but what I was reduced to because I didn't know was awful. I'm not one to give up, so I will continue to participate and b...

somekid · somekid

My mom has been dealing with alcoholism for most of my life. She is a heavy binge drinker and suffers from many mental illnesses. I've become severely depressed and I've been self-harming for over 3 years now. I've tried to talk to her about my suicidal thoughts or depression and she tells me I'm a kid an...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of the worldwide fellowship of al-anon. I decided that it was getting lonely in my apartment and I wanted to get some companionship. I have decided to foster a cat through my local SPCA. After I agreed to the cat, the volunteer on the other end o...

Pushka · Pushka

I hang up on people when I'm just done with a heated conversation, sometimes it's before the conversation has started .. it's probably very rude maybe wrong .. part of the reason I hang up is because of my mouth. My brain and my mouth are on two separate playing fields .. and at some point my mouth out run...

Two Step · Two Step

I have been in Al-Anon for 13 years but it seems that I never get beyond Step 2. My 41 year old son has been living with me since 2005 and been clean for most of the time. However, I should have seen it coming. In March he blew up, destroyed a chair, threw paint all over the kitchen, broke a window, cut him...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Sigh. Well to start, I always thought of myself as an alcoholic. I was a binge drinker as a teenager, out of control in my twenties (I married another drinker and we drank and fought our way to divorce) and then at 30, I met a real hardcore drinker and started the whole drinking and fighting cycle again,...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I have checked out a few options for meetings, but nothing has clicked until now and it was awesome. The meeting was just like my home group in my home town that I have been missing this last year. So I even took a great friend that has A's in her life and she loved it as well. So I feel pumped and with my month o...

4my2kids · 4my2kids

My ex is in the hospital again for suicide watch. Second time since Father's Day. Yes it's time to tell my kids what's going on. I am trying to get ahold of sons unit Chaplin first so he knows what's going on since I can't tell our son in person. Then I will tell our daughter (10) I am relieved ex is in hospital...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Not sure how to respond here (Preview) So my AH displayed his drinking problem infront of my mom last week (not going to work for 3 days and just drinking home and watching tv, driving to get more booze, etc, though not disturbing anybody, bringing food for lunch for all a few times, not putting tv loud, etc). My mom asked me a lot of questions a...	Venera	13	488	Aug 5, 2013 by abbyal
	Good Morning Everyone! (Preview) It's Sunday morning. The sun is peeking through the trees that surround my home, My dogs have all been outside and done their thing. Now I sit here with a cup of coffee and I kinda giggle at myself. Last night I got a call from my son. He, his girlfriend, another young lady friend of hers, and her mother...	John	14	430	Aug 5, 2013 by PP
	understanding powerlessness and helplessness (Preview) I had a hard time accepting being powerless...then I came , through program, to understood that I am powerless over OTHER people or places and things, but not helpless about can I take care of me anyway??? Sure I can.... Maybe this will help sort out the difference....	neshema2	6	920	Aug 5, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Why I am in Alanon (Preview) I am new in Alanon, I started out doing one meeting a week. Which in my situation was not enough, so I found another meeting to go to and now I go to 3 meetings a week and plus I get on here now so I go to one everyday. I got involved in Alanon because I have a very unmanageable life and I do not have a relationship w...	Tiff5484	6	799	Aug 5, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Let's talk about acceptance (Preview) Acceptance is really where I struggle. I tend to look at my AH and remember who he was, who we were, and I want that back as I'm sure he does, too. Yet, he's changed, he's started drinking, he's gotten a DUI, he lies now about stupid stuff, he wants me to just blow off unacceptable behavior. And, I have ch...	ilovedogs	13	1951	Aug 5, 2013 by Breakingfree
	My first al anon meeting (Preview) So I attended my first al anon meeting. I didn't know what to expect....the group was so wonderful and warm. One of the speakers read out her story (1 year member) and from her first line to the last it could have been my story. They encouraged me to keep coming back which I will. I felt empowered by the...	magazine	9	359	Aug 5, 2013 by grateful2be
	Irony .. and the God of my understandings wicked sense of humor .. (Preview) Ok .. sooo .. I'm dealing with court stuff and for the LIFE of me couldn't figure out why the STBAX's arrest wasn't listed on the county website .. it's amazing what is listed that is considered public record. Our little town lists more than most so it's informative. Yes, this is going to sound so unhea...	Pushka	4	368	Aug 5, 2013 by Pushka
	Some stress relieved .. (Preview) The kids and I had a great day. I worked around the house a LOT because it's a mess .. that's ok .. it didn't get here over night and it's going to take another full day of working to get it looking better. The house is a complete reflection of my brain at the moment .. kind of not pretty. I was even able to get...	Pushka	5	416	Aug 5, 2013 by wornoutmrsfixit
	Just sayin.............. (Preview)	neshema2	2	249	Aug 5, 2013 by Jerry F
	No AA Meeting tonight (Preview) I was going to go to a AA open meeting tonight but I was asked to go to a BBQ going away party so I said yes. I thought I just needed to get out and be with people that are smiling and having some fun. Had a nice time and I'm tired now and ready to relax and just watch some TV. Good night all......see you tomorro...	Cathyinaz	5	310	Aug 5, 2013 by neshema2
	In order to keep it... (Preview) You must give it away. That lesson remains a large part of my serenity and my sobriety. This was a "higher education" sponsor - sponsee work event from thought to action and of course I attended all classes for fear of the consequences of if I didn't. Aloha MIP Family. My wife and I jus...	Jerry F	5	351	Aug 5, 2013 by neshema2
	Daily Renewal (Preview) Daily renewal is a statement about how you wish your day, and ultimately your life, to unfold. It is your soul speaking to your heart, your heart translating to your mind, and your mind giving your body directions. It is ultimately an expression of self-love! -Bob Greene	oldergal	4	276	Aug 4, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Struggling to cope, don't know what to do (Preview) I'm really struggling to cope with my mums drinking. She keeps letting me down, dismissing me, ignoring me when i try to tell her i'm upset and I feel angry about it so much, and another part of me feels so much emotion and love. She's been drinking now for over 30 years, but used to eat healthy and now she st...	qwerty49	14	442	Aug 4, 2013 by grateful2be
	good old step THREE...my scariest step (Preview) I was on step 4, but in the light of latest events, I am BACK on the hardest step for me...STEP 3 on STEP 3..............I "made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of my Higher Power AS I UNDERSTAND IT...." I once told a newbie, this was my rendition of STEP 3......imagine ly...	neshema2	6	708	Aug 4, 2013 by likemyheart
	Family Week at My Son's Rehab was Spiritual and absolutely draining but in a good way (Preview) Hi Everyone, Yesterday my son graduated rehab all of his peers in the house (small facility-25addicts) each spoke to my son. First the counselors, all recovered addicts or alcoholics, who decided to make saving those like themselves a life goal. My son upon release was there 30 days. So no other male...	FAITH1988	2	395	Aug 4, 2013 by grateful2be
	Going to church at my sons program ranch.. (Preview) I just want to say that I will be praying for all of us that are and have lived in chaos caused by the ones that we love due to there choices of addictions.. We all need serenity, and our higher power to touch us so we know we will be ok. God bless you all and many prayers will be said in a very spiritual place that...	Gaby	1	221	Aug 4, 2013 by grateful2be
	Some things should not been said (Preview) I been to every meeting this week. I'm working hard . My Sponser can't guide me anymore things have taken place on her side and can't work with me. I'm now on my own. My 9 month ah husband moved back I'm the house . He is better he wants to help me get better soon. Before he told me he was moving back in he stated h...	Ms co-dependent	12	451	Aug 4, 2013 by Tiff5484
	Spin Cycle (Preview) So here we go again - he's drying out after a week-long binge of whiskey, aggressive, obnoxious, hateful behavior to others and the falling-down-drunk injuries to himself. It's a cycle that happens every few weeks or months, depending on circumstances. It seems to have been made worse after a few mo...	Phoenix7	7	619	Aug 4, 2013 by peace2me
	My son - what a wonder (Preview) My daughter called me this evening. A co-worker of hers ran into my son putting in job apps. He is staying right now in another place where there is more supervision and less temptation. It's been a bumpy road for me this week. I've hit some ruts and I've missed some, too. I think he might have called...	grateful2be	19	461	Aug 4, 2013 by Gigi Gibson
	FINAL LETTER TO SON IN REHAB WRITTEN BY HUSBAND AND I - Thank you Grateful (Preview) This is our final draft of the letter to our son in REHAB at his retreat next week. I want to thank all of you for the suggestions. This is the letter we are going with, I feel calmness with this letter. I will need to read it 200 times so I am able to deliver it to our son in public with my husband by my side withou...	FAITH1988	12	6147	Aug 4, 2013 by Gigi Gibson
	Dealing with my Emotions (Preview) I just don't know but I'm having a really hard time dealing with this. I won't do anything stupid like calling him because I just know that would start this mess all over again. I have to believe he will find his way and seek help. I fear him being on the streets but I also have to remember he did it not me...	Cathyinaz	14	684	Aug 4, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	relay for life, celebrating & letting go! (Preview) I sure felt a lot standing & walking at the relay for life for cancer. I didn't actually participate in the relay but I felt like it was what I needed. My dad died of cancer. We celebrated his memory & I feel like I can let go of a little more of my grief. I can go through all of my problems or anxieties b...	Hoot Nanny	0	379	Aug 3, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	For Cathy (Preview) I thought of you when I saw this............feel better, nice lady....Life is out there waiting for you to shine your light in it	neshema2	3	252	Aug 4, 2013 by Two Step
	My very first time reaching out as a long-time girlfriend to an alcoholic (Preview) Have no idea where to begin -- so I am just going to write about the present moment. My boyfriend of nearly 8 years - we have lived together, he has lost jobs continuously for years - and I lost my job a few times NOT for drinking, because I do not drink, but for me, if was for unfortunate lay-offs from very go...	mallie	13	400	Aug 3, 2013 by grateful2be
	How do you start your day to set it up for a great day? (Preview) I love to get up early before the kids and have some alone time to spend with God, my three daily readers ~ Hope for Today, Courage to Change, and One Day at a Time and my coffee. I have my best days when I start out just like that and have my attitude of gratitude on first thing and then everything that comes...	Breakingfree	15	549	Aug 4, 2013 by grateful2be
	Progress not perfection.... (Preview) Had a great day...got my work done and even volunteered some stuff to some other guys who work there...Good day; pleasant weather, work details done in rythym and with smiles. I like when life clicks like that makes it soooo easy to skip and play and laugh until.....get to the credit union and park m...	Jerry F	6	411	Aug 4, 2013 by grateful2be
	A new addition to my family, picture of my baby puppy (Preview) Got a new puppy and the girls are so happy about it. All my friends say are you crazy you live in an apartment and you are so busy, it's the last thing you need, blah, blah, blah. I laugh and say it won't affect you and I can handle it. I had to discuss it in length with my 15 year old and even my exAh, because the d...	Breakingfree	13	431	Aug 4, 2013 by Mrs t
	Starting to appreciate and understand the wisdom of the HP (Preview) Just wanted to share where I am under a different thread rather than the original "am desperate" post. Simply because .... I am no longer desperate so dad has turned a real corner health wise - up walking for the first time in over 10 days - no more paranoid chat about the doctors or nurses b...	Mrs t	5	400	Aug 4, 2013 by Mrs t
	Detaching and taking the HIGH road (Preview) Bettina wisely said on her post **"Grateful, how about we just don't attach ourselves to sufferingand decide to not suffer ? That's what I attain to do, but we can't avoid it all, we wouldnt be human, but we can lighten it. **** Well, I try to broadcast on my facebook to help find homes for ...	neshema2	2	361	Aug 3, 2013 by wornoutmrsfixit
	Doing the best I can! (Preview) I've spent most of the day reading, praying, meditating and on this board. I'm trying to mind my own business, my a/a daughter who I had such a melt down with last month when she didn't get her son's ssa check. Since then her 28 y.o. son is staying with her and she is supposely trying to get rid of her bf. H...	Highlyfavored	7	373	Aug 3, 2013 by Highlyfavored
	So sick and tired (Preview) I'm so tired and everyday I think how much longer do I have to suffer? My AH is very abusive emotionally and he is drunk every single day. No one should have to live this way. I have some serious health issues and the stress of him is killing me. Oh how I want out but my income doesn't give me enough to even pay t...	wings of a dove	8	411	Aug 3, 2013 by Sweet Stanley
	HELP (Preview) I desperately need some advice. I feel like I am drowning in misery, everyday is a constant fight. Both of my parents were heroin addicts, my brother turned out to be a meth user and my 16 year old son is currently in recovery for alcohol. My son is doing really well and has taught me so much through his r...	ARod	13	320	Aug 3, 2013 by Debilyn
	He LIED to me!? (Preview) I am laughing at myself really .. I had the opportunity to hear my sponsor speak for the first time at an open AA meeting last night and OMGosh .. I'm SOOOO glad I went!! I'm struggling with the face to face meetings at the moment, because of a person and me trying to learn how not to shut people out when I hur...	Pushka	8	520	Aug 3, 2013 by wornoutmrsfixit
	I'm angry at your qualifiers (Preview) This is my issue for sure. Everytime I read about how abusive, arrogant, and jerky some of your qualifiers act, I get mad. I can preach detachment and all that, but I don't really walk in your shoes at this moment. When I walked away from my alcoholic ex, it was because I was also a drunk and I was rejecti...	pinkchip	17	779	Aug 3, 2013 by In The Forest
	What am I thankful for??? (Preview) With all thats hit of late, I am not the only one having "trials" and so I don't feel the victim...Its just LIFE.....I find that if I reach out to others , when I am in pain, and I do "service" , I FEEL better...its like service makes my stuff less bad or released from me enough to find t...	neshema2	1	355	Aug 3, 2013 by Breakingfree
	What did I do to take care of me today???? (Preview) It has been a "Rough" return to program...I saw some old negative stuff try and sneak in a return....Since my return, I have had to battle w/some stubborn old patterns that came back....Then Got sick w/ a horrible attack of IBS....THEN yesterday, my friends and I who rescue horses togethe...	neshema2	1	364	Aug 3, 2013 by Breakingfree
	PERSPECTIVE! (Preview) "It is senseless to blame others or your environment for your miseries. Change begins from the moment you muster the courage to act. When you change, the environment will change. The power for change is found nowhere but within our own life.". Ikeda -- Edited by Bettina on Friday 2nd of A...	Bettina	9	379	Aug 3, 2013 by Jerry F
	went to an AA meeting (Preview) I am really scared to even post this here. I have no idea what kind of response I will get. But because this has always been a safe place to share, I want to put this on the board. For those who don't know I broke up with my Abf a month ago, and I really worked my program for 9 mo. prior to that-- so I could g...	giraffe13	8	362	Aug 3, 2013 by giraffe13
	needs: is this just too much to ask?? (Preview) This was the moment again where I had to reset my boundaries, and with that developed a scream of my needs. I'm afraid ego is raising its head here, first I go months without and then I shout out loud in a moment of explosion. my question to you: is this too much to ask? I'm a bit out of balance i guess, having d...	tortuga	6	402	Aug 3, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Don't run from it (Preview) "Suffering only gets worse when we try to run from it, rather then face it."	Bettina	10	421	Aug 2, 2013 by Bettina
	Just attended a great alanon meeting....Just what I needed! (Preview) I attend meetings one time a week here and boy, tonight did I ever need it. My AH has been struggling lately, which sets off my triggers. I know better than to get into his business...but sometimes, it is SO hard to keep my mouth shut!!!! I have been working really hard at detaching from it... It's has been...	Sweet Stanley	4	246	Aug 2, 2013 by maryjane
	New here... Should I write an Impact Letter? (Preview) Hi group, Thanks for listening. I am new to this site, and new to even knowing that my partner (O) is an alcoholic. He only admitted in 2 and half weeks ago when he went to his first AA meeing, the day after his last binge. I went with him to that meeting and several others thanks to the openminded group who h...	liliana223	10	851	Aug 2, 2013 by liliana223
	New stage in my recovery (Preview) I truly think now I will be going through a new stage. I think I will not be in contact with my son because he has let go. He had quit talking to everyone in this life and mom is the last one. I will give him up forever if it means recovery but I will also have some sad feelings going forward. I'm going to have t...	Cathyinaz	11	562	Aug 2, 2013 by Pushka
	thank you friends (Preview) Hi All: Thank you for the kind responses to my post yesterday. I am so grateful to this site and all of you who share your ESH. I know I have made some progress but the conversations I have had w AH recently make me realize I am still not truly accepting that what I am saying, doing or not has no affect on him a...	yanksfan51	6	321	Aug 2, 2013 by oldergal
	Oh My Job (Preview) Yesterday was not a good day when it came to my job. I was not invited to the meetings and was out of the loop. Next thing I know two of the people in the meeting comes to me and asks me to start looking for a consultant then a new employee for MRP. Inventory is a mess and needs correction asap. Well mine a...	Cathyinaz	4	399	Aug 2, 2013 by tiredtonite
	What Is A Functioning Alcoholic As Opposed to a Regular Alcoholic? (Preview) ?	oldergal	34	993	Aug 2, 2013 by grateful2be
	How to prepare your kids for their dads death (Preview) Yes that was so hard to type, but its coming to that. Even ex's mom thinks so. I will be getting daughter (10) into counseling, hopefully this week. But I fear their dads end is near and I just don't know how to prepare her (son is 21 and in army out of state and I don't want to upset him with things he can't cont...	4my2kids	26	552	Aug 1, 2013 by Bettina
	I will rest for another day! (Preview) I will rest for another day & then post how letting go went. I just want to say that as I will not let myself fall apart. Kathleen	Hoot Nanny	2	250	Aug 2, 2013 by Turris
	AH Goes to Court (Preview) Well, he went to court on Friday for his reckless driving charge. He went alone. His sister acted as his attorney but she wanted him to receive the restrictions he got. He was ordered to install the ignition lock system on his truck so that it will not start unless he is 0.00 BAC. With every failed readin...	wornoutmrsfixit	3	331	Aug 2, 2013 by Pushka
	I never thought of this, but I DO HOPE I really fit in (Preview) I come here, read posts...try to give useful ES&H and I am thinking I know I am Coda, I know I am an Acoa, and I THINK I am alanoner as well.... I do hope I fit in here in some way ...I know my posts are sometimes long...I cut to the chase...I am about as open as the grand canyon, I don't even try to hide any...	neshema2	8	467	Aug 2, 2013 by neshema2
	was it ok to share? (Preview) I feel i know the answer, but I do want somebody to agree or disagree. We live far away from my family (parents and brother's family). So nobody knew my husband had a drinking problem. This summer my mom visited us for two months with my brother's daughter, and for the first time they saw my husband drinki...	Venera	26	755	Aug 1, 2013 by grateful2be
	Thursday morning meeting (Preview) I will chair this morning if there is no chair	mercedes1959	0	189	Aug 1, 2013 by mercedes1959
	thank you (Preview) I can't begin to know how to thank all of you for taking the time to share with me after my venting last night. I was a wreck and in fact there was nothing to worry about, everything was okay, but what I was reduced to because I didn't know was awful. I'm not one to give up, so I will continue to participate and b...	AngieK	4	334	Aug 1, 2013 by AngieK
	My mom is an alcoholic (Preview) My mom has been dealing with alcoholism for most of my life. She is a heavy binge drinker and suffers from many mental illnesses. I've become severely depressed and I've been self-harming for over 3 years now. I've tried to talk to her about my suicidal thoughts or depression and she tells me I'm a kid an...	somekid	4	385	Aug 1, 2013 by Jozie
	Hard time accepting positive feedback (Preview) Hi everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of the worldwide fellowship of al-anon. I decided that it was getting lonely in my apartment and I wanted to get some companionship. I have decided to foster a cat through my local SPCA. After I agreed to the cat, the volunteer on the other end o...	slogan_jim	12	427	Aug 1, 2013 by Turris
	Hanging up .. (Preview) I hang up on people when I'm just done with a heated conversation, sometimes it's before the conversation has started .. it's probably very rude maybe wrong .. part of the reason I hang up is because of my mouth. My brain and my mouth are on two separate playing fields .. and at some point my mouth out run...	Pushka	7	474	Aug 1, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Always stuck at Step 2 (Preview) I have been in Al-Anon for 13 years but it seems that I never get beyond Step 2. My 41 year old son has been living with me since 2005 and been clean for most of the time. However, I should have seen it coming. In March he blew up, destroyed a chair, threw paint all over the kitchen, broke a window, cut him...	Two Step	6	474	Aug 1, 2013 by Turris
	Just a ramble. (Preview) Sigh. Well to start, I always thought of myself as an alcoholic. I was a binge drinker as a teenager, out of control in my twenties (I married another drinker and we drank and fought our way to divorce) and then at 30, I met a real hardcore drinker and started the whole drinking and fighting cycle again,...	Melly1248	7	493	Aug 1, 2013 by grateful2be
	I found a new awesome meeting Tuesday evenings (Preview) I have checked out a few options for meetings, but nothing has clicked until now and it was awesome. The meeting was just like my home group in my home town that I have been missing this last year. So I even took a great friend that has A's in her life and she loved it as well. So I feel pumped and with my month o...	Breakingfree	7	240	Aug 1, 2013 by Jackie11
	He is in hospital again (Preview) My ex is in the hospital again for suicide watch. Second time since Father's Day. Yes it's time to tell my kids what's going on. I am trying to get ahold of sons unit Chaplin first so he knows what's going on since I can't tell our son in person. Then I will tell our daughter (10) I am relieved ex is in hospital...	4my2kids	11	525	Aug 1, 2013 by 4my2kids
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.