Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

i surrender i give up , im emtoinal broken down. i cant think of a reason to stay here . im dont fighting with my A , to many hurtful words were tossed theres no recovery from what we both said. im to sick to get help, im so confused and he sits there and smirks and tells me how sick and twisted my mind is. i w...

faith84 · faith84

So, after enduring four years of living and overly loving a heroin addict, I FINALLY got myself to an Al Anon meeting last night. No matter how much literature I've read on the disease and codependency, no matter how many therapy sessions I have had with both my therapist and my friends and family, fo...

grateful2be · grateful2be

This morning, a beautifully clear and sunny day in my locale, I went outside to my garden where I noticed a lone pink cone flower amidst the others that have all bloomed and turned brown and hard. I noticed a lump of something in the center of it. I walked closer to investigate. It was an iridescent gr...

tortuga · tortuga

I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my own illness. I wouldn't come here if I didn't want to learn about myself and how to accept and love all about me. I wouldn't come back here, if I wasn't tired of being victimized due to my own weaknesses. I wouldn't have found this place if I didn't notice something was...

neshema2 · neshema2

I made a statement on my thread about its not being about the A's and N'a and Grateful picked up on a salient point about the lady asking one of my responsdees about the book being laid upon the sidewalk I posted that I had noticed it but did not want to open my "big mouth" MEANING that I sometimes...

yvettek · yvettek

I'm sorry for any mistakes I make with this post. This is my first time here and also the first time I ever talk about my son's problem with someone else. My son has been battling alcoholism for 8 years now. He's been to rehab twice, tried to commit suicide more times than I dare to remember and every now an...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning I need to say a little about getting in the last word, trying to explain, or answering emails, texts even phone calls. I just don't know why I had to do these things. WHY?? A fellow member finally got it though my head I can let go and I will be OK. To continue to try and explain, fix or ge...

Gaby · Gaby

Well my son has now been in rehab for 4 months and 1 day. He completes his 6 months of sobriety by choice in November. I still am not exactly where I want to be in my recovery. His Sponser has been working with me on the letting go letting god. As his pastor would say "your son needs to man up" face th...

Katytexasmom · Katytexasmom

My son keeps runnIng to his dads. His dad has no rules, no insight And hes never there. He buys our 19 year old beer and smokes pot with him. He sent me a message that says our son knows he has a problem, and we just need to encourage him right now....he needs encouragement. What he means by that is he wants us (...

goodmonkey · goodmonkey

I've been away from al-Anon for almost 3 years. at the same time i've been in a relationship with a man, who's not an addict. BUT he's a rageoholic, a victim of domestic violence as a kid (both getting beaten and witnessing his mom getting beaten) and grew up in a war-zone city in another part of the worl...

Lyne · Lyne

Last night at my F2F meeting, the topic was sponsorship. Throughout the years, I have heard people in recovery talk about their "meetings" and their "sponsors" like they were way too important. Now that I have accepted recovery as a very important part of my life, I get it. S...

Bettina · Bettina

" When will I realize that I need not permit the alcoholics behavior to confuse my life and destroy my peace of mind? When will I learn that there is no compulsion, in law or ethics, that forces me to accept humiliation, uncertainty and despair. Have I perhaps accepted it because I have a subconsci...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

This past weekend, I decided to accept my friends' invitation to go camping at a mountain camping site that my family used to go to when our kids were in school. At first, I was concerned that going back there would bring back some uncomfortable feelings. This was a place where memories were created for...

DavidG · DavidG

The greatest gift Alanon offers us is Lois, and each and every one of us... and each one of us matters so much, so please keep coming back. In 2011 A*** and I took a train north of New York and came to the woodland town where Lois Bill and hundreds...

islandtime · islandtime

For the last 2 years, I have been shut down, lights out, nobodys home...... to the point of hardly speaking a word to my AH, not looking at him, and in general acting like he didn't exist. This was not something I was doing on purpose, It just happened. When I did talk, it was sharp and mean, and critical...

grateful2be · grateful2be

"Don't miss this. Don't miss your life. There's infinitely more than the experience of love we already know. Push against your borders. Dare to move through the next threshold to the freedom awaiting you." (Paula D'Arcy)

Pushka · Pushka

I love that saying if nothing changes .. well .. nothing changes .. in seeing the STBAX on Sunday night as weird and intense as that reaction was it really goes to show me how much things in my little world have changed .. my world is not so little. Those who are struggling through their own situations and...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Just been reading recent posts about the abuse cycle. I reckon, we can't post about that nasty old abuse cycle often enough, when someone mentions living with abuse. I didn't understand it for years, I just got sucked in again and again. But the more you understand it, the more obvious it all becomes an...

oldergal · oldergal

Alanon has helped me alot, combined with all the self-help books I have read, first hand experience and I think age too I have come to a few conclusions....no matter what I have "choices". Looking back on my marriage and consequently my divorce, I concluded that it was HIS fault that he made...

Katytexasmom · Katytexasmom

My 19 year old son came around a few weeks ago...he sounded great! He was his old self, not using (no program) and it gave me hope! Then he got with some old friends slid there we go. He really wants to stop....but he's just not ready yet. He wants to go back to school and go into the navy, but this weekend I f...

afglin · afglin

Yesterday on Dr. Oz he had Steven Tyler for a guest. They talked about addiction and recovery. He brought on his doctor from the Betty Ford Center. The doctor has a great book and Steven Tyler wrote the foreword. I ordered it for my Kindle for under $9. I stopped the book I was reading and started it. WO...

hisimage · hisimage

I hope this is okay to post here. I am wanting to change my name. Do I have to create a new account or can I somehow change it?

joker · joker

I had a huge relization yesterday about why I alllow alcoholics and their abusive behaviors into my life. As some of you know I had just left my extremely abusive alcoholic BF that is no in jail for abusing me. I allow abuse as I abuse myself-mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually. I can na...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

After working my hinder off to get into this RN program and doing my general eds, prerequisettes and sciences up the ying this last year I was finally accepted into the ADN program. I have been on top of the world! Day one was yesterday and if I thought I had worked hard up to now, I am about to prove to myself...

Rose50 · Rose50

Throughout the day, I find myself going back & forth between worry and fear for my son to calm and acceptance. Am I making any progress??

qwerty49 · qwerty49

So after nasty words and arguing for weeks, my alcoholic mum textd me saying she wanted to make friends before i leave so i said i do too, and invited her round for lunch, today she came round & told me how her house was going up for sale on Monday, she's been saying for years she's going to sell the house...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

The pseudo-ex and I texted this morning. I needed his legal advice on something that was bothering me and asked. I told him that I didn't want to talk about anything personal - I just needed his legal opinion on a matter. Since he is the master of self control he was - cool, calm and collected (as much as you...

Jerry F · Jerry F

a thing that I can. I've not done a certain 9th step for a long time because of the caveat "except when to do so would injure them or others" and so up till now I've poke and stabbed at it to see if I can rid myself of the self resentment for what I did a long while ago...before recovery came along...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Going back in time: On August 10th 1 am I let my mom go. I was up before dawn & there were some dark moments & still are. I am just grateful that time has gone by & I am experiencing the dawn in a different way. I feel very poetic these days & tend to share songs & titles that mean very much t...

Bettina · Bettina

There is no change without Action. You can say "This is it Life". Time for me to change this Life. I know I can do it. And then set yourself a plan. There is nothing you cant do if you have HOPE and put this hope into action.

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Today's Reminder " I sit on a man's back, choking him and making him carry me, and yet assure myself and others that I am very sorry for him and wish to ease his lot by all possible means -- except by getting off his back." " Teach me to leave to others their inborn right to dignity and indep...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

Just for today I will not force a solution. Based on my recent split, I realized the verbose email I penned to my ex was an attempt to control the situation. If I pan back and look at the times we have reconciled, with the exception of ONE, I have always been the one who has tried to write something eloquent,...

Bettina · Bettina

Step One must be learned and repeated until it becomes part of me. Whenever I give in to my natural impulse and habit to take over and to try and force a change, I'm in trouble again. I know I can only make progress when I really believe in and practice the First Step: 1. We admitted we were powerless over a...

Aloha · Aloha

I finally worked out a minor resentment I've been having lately and it gave me the courage to speak up today after taking the time to write things down. I really surprised myself when of all people who ended upon my resentment list, it was my boss. I was sitting down this weekend trying to pull up a new name...

faith84 · faith84

Hello all: It has been a while since I have been on here. A couple of years actually. I'm still fighting the good fight. My ABF has been using for too long. Finally I gave him the ultimatum back in the beginning of July, and told him it's rehab or your out. So after 4weeks of him "deciding" he fin...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I generally stay disengaged. Do not communicate for the most part and with the order for supervised visitation he has done nothing for months...and then...it starts again. He goes for 3-4 months of quiet and leaving me alone and not harassing our child and then back at it. I tell myself - you can't...

John · John

It was through my journey in recovery, starting in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous, that I gratefully found my way through the doors of Al-Anon some years later. This video shares the beginning of my becoming a "Miracle In Progress" and what it took for me to finally surrender to the recovery proce...

nycwolf · nycwolf

good afternoon all I've been with my bf for 2 and a half years now and for a year and a half of it, he's been addicted to heroin. he has struggled with this addiction most of his life. I've been going to an al-anon meeting every once in awhile and it certainly does help...even after reading a bit of literatu...

lorraine · lorraine

My boyfriend has been sober for 5 months now and is really improving thos time. He doin good. He goin to a group session and one on one once a week. He seeing his doctor regularly and being treated for his depression. He doing all he can and is really trying. My problem is i expecting too much from him and get...

oldergal · oldergal

Don't take what the alcoholics, addicts do personally, three quarters of the time they don't know what they are doing or why they are doing it and if its wrong most of the time they don't care or don't want to care and the cycle goes on. They don't mean to be ugly, they are probably really nice people. But ri...

Rose50 · Rose50

I have not heard from my son since last Friday. He was supposed to have picked up his cellphone at my place on Saturday and never showed up. I went to a meeting earlier today and that helped to ease my fear and anxiety. Nothing I can do but wait for any news. I am so tired of feeling sad.

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning I truly thought I could have a relationship with my son but I'm realizing it's not easy if he's still drinking. I went early this morning and left his things ( paperwork ) he needed to his old place and left it on the porch. I didn't want to see him. He has been calling now that he has a charger...

joker · joker

Its been hard letting go of my alcoholic bf that had been abusive-in all ways toward me.Hhe is now in jail for physically abusing me. He has plead not guilty to the charge and trial is set for Dec 16-18/13. I had been praying for him and asking for god's will to be done in his life. I am enjoying the sin...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

I am very new to Al anon. I have yet to attend a meeting. My sister in law has attended a few and has been a blessing through this all. I am struggling with how far to let this go before I decide its necessary to leave. I have 3 beautiful daughters, 11,6, and 1. The older two are from a previous relationship. I s...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Obviously there is a difference between arguing discussing & just stating a fact! I am tired of my AH not letting it go. He thinks that every time we discuss something or I stand up for myself we are arguing. I am so tired of this. His first wife seemed to have argued w/ him a lot because he freaks out whe...

PP · PP

Hello all, I am teaching a class this morning in my home that I haven't taught in several years and am so anxious. On top of this, my daughter is starting a new job this morning and she is anxious, and my cat is following me around anxiously meowing, wanting me to feed her more. I am applying my steps and sl...

neshema2 · neshema2

CAlled A brother..... Court went "ok" as "Ok" as it could have gone....He does not have his license back yet, he will have to go to the registry and plea with them, hardship case, etc (re: his work) and they are going to send him to drinking and driving school for free...so even th...

sweeetr · sweeetr

My enableing inlaws and husbands AAunt put my son in the middle of adult business by talking about my choice to not him stay with Aaunt anymore when I found out what an A she was, in front of him at the lake a couple months ago. After the verbal abuse I heard from her on my phone recording after I removed my so...

Desirae · Desirae

Meeting scheduled in the Al-anon chat room at 9:00AM Eastern Standard Time Topics are: Control, managing fear, anxiety and Letting Go and Letting God The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. U...

Katytexasmom · Katytexasmom

My son called. His cell phone is off. i told him that he cannot move in and go to school as we had planned because while I was lining up tutors and gettithat he school packets he was partying like a rock star! I told him I'm doing all the work and that's not going to work. I told him I saw all ths on Facebook and t...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

And after all that, feeling all upset and confused, I turned off my computer and decided to spend the weekend technology free, just hanging with my daughter and thinking happy thoughts. So we snuggled up on the couch to watch a tv show and suddenly, there is this terrific wailing and screaming coming i...

Pushka · Pushka

This town is way to small .. ugh. The kids and I have been going to starbucks to use the internet and honestly I have been waiting for this to happen. Sure enough tonight is the night he almost walked in .. that really threw me. I don't like the emotional reaction I had to him .. it's not even the emotional...

qwerty49 · qwerty49

My ex partner & i broke up just before new year just gone as his behavior was at it's lowest point. Since then he left me 30+ letters in my letter box & wouldn't leave me alone. He sat outside my flat one day in the garden for 3 hours & a neighbor rang the police. After that i had to report him for ha...

Tiff5484 · Tiff5484

I have been on here for some time now and I have read most of the stuff that ppl write about her ah and abf and so forth. I cant say that about my ex because I do not know if he is or not and I never seen the behavior ppl are talking about on here nor has he ever been drunk around me. I mean I have read about the sympton...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi-I just got some great advice from my sponsor. Dont take lying personally. My A spouse lied to me on our vacation but I just discovered it yesterday. In the past when she lied I felt like my world was ending. How could she do this to me???? I am on the honest end of the spectrum. I make a point of it. I...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi MIP Family Going camping to the wilderness of NJ There is no electricity nor computer access. I will definitely go into withdrawal and will miss you all See you Friday

afglin · afglin

Are the meetings still going on here! I have attended many in the past. I tried to get in today.I put my nickname and did connect and it acted like it was connecting but went black. I use java. I don't use mirc. LIN

beryl80 · beryl80

Hi All Not sure really where to start my husband has had a severe alcohol problem on and off for about 8 years. About 2 years ago he got help went to the point of being completely sober for about a year and then I started seeing the signs slowly creeping in one by one. ~The last two or three months have been th...

qwerty49 · qwerty49

i've just received another delightful text message from my alcoholic mother.. stupidly i text her last night admitting i was hurt about her preferring to spend time with her lodgers daughter than me when i have always tried to meet up with her, go shopping, spend time, but she's NEVER been interested...

oldergal · oldergal

What is closure, what does it really mean to us, is there ever really closure when a loved one dies? In support and respect....oldergal

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	i give up i do not want to live (Preview) i surrender i give up , im emtoinal broken down. i cant think of a reason to stay here . im dont fighting with my A , to many hurtful words were tossed theres no recovery from what we both said. im to sick to get help, im so confused and he sits there and smirks and tells me how sick and twisted my mind is. i w...	Ms co-dependent	19	2196	Sep 13, 2013 by ClearTheFog
	First Al Anon Meeting Last Night (Preview) So, after enduring four years of living and overly loving a heroin addict, I FINALLY got myself to an Al Anon meeting last night. No matter how much literature I've read on the disease and codependency, no matter how many therapy sessions I have had with both my therapist and my friends and family, fo...	faith84	7	455	Sep 13, 2013 by DavidG
	What have I missed? (Preview) This morning, a beautifully clear and sunny day in my locale, I went outside to my garden where I noticed a lone pink cone flower amidst the others that have all bloomed and turned brown and hard. I noticed a lump of something in the center of it. I walked closer to investigate. It was an iridescent gr...	grateful2be	9	420	Sep 13, 2013 by grateful2be
	I'm here because I want healing! (Preview) I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for my own illness. I wouldn't come here if I didn't want to learn about myself and how to accept and love all about me. I wouldn't come back here, if I wasn't tired of being victimized due to my own weaknesses. I wouldn't have found this place if I didn't notice something was...	tortuga	9	401	Sep 13, 2013 by ClearTheFog
	Amend to Grateful (Preview) I made a statement on my thread about its not being about the A's and N'a and Grateful picked up on a salient point about the lady asking one of my responsdees about the book being laid upon the sidewalk I posted that I had noticed it but did not want to open my "big mouth" MEANING that I sometimes...	neshema2	10	558	Sep 12, 2013 by neshema2
	Paranoid (Preview) I'm sorry for any mistakes I make with this post. This is my first time here and also the first time I ever talk about my son's problem with someone else. My son has been battling alcoholism for 8 years now. He's been to rehab twice, tried to commit suicide more times than I dare to remember and every now an...	yvettek	5	466	Sep 12, 2013 by grateful2be
	Revelation (Preview) Good Morning I need to say a little about getting in the last word, trying to explain, or answering emails, texts even phone calls. I just don't know why I had to do these things. WHY?? A fellow member finally got it though my head I can let go and I will be OK. To continue to try and explain, fix or ge...	Cathyinaz	14	599	Sep 12, 2013 by Pushka
	November is coming to soon.. Don't know how to feel.. (Preview) Well my son has now been in rehab for 4 months and 1 day. He completes his 6 months of sobriety by choice in November. I still am not exactly where I want to be in my recovery. His Sponser has been working with me on the letting go letting god. As his pastor would say "your son needs to man up" face th...	Gaby	5	339	Sep 12, 2013 by bud
	His dad is his greatest enabler! (Preview) My son keeps runnIng to his dads. His dad has no rules, no insight And hes never there. He buys our 19 year old beer and smokes pot with him. He sent me a message that says our son knows he has a problem, and we just need to encourage him right now....he needs encouragement. What he means by that is he wants us (...	Katytexasmom	3	368	Sep 12, 2013 by Ness
	Insanity again - new username too (Preview) I've been away from al-Anon for almost 3 years. at the same time i've been in a relationship with a man, who's not an addict. BUT he's a rageoholic, a victim of domestic violence as a kid (both getting beaten and witnessing his mom getting beaten) and grew up in a war-zone city in another part of the worl...	goodmonkey	10	395	Sep 12, 2013 by Jerry F
	sponsors (Preview) Last night at my F2F meeting, the topic was sponsorship. Throughout the years, I have heard people in recovery talk about their "meetings" and their "sponsors" like they were way too important. Now that I have accepted recovery as a very important part of my life, I get it. S...	Lyne	6	410	Sep 12, 2013 by neshema2
	Today's reminder (Preview) " When will I realize that I need not permit the alcoholics behavior to confuse my life and destroy my peace of mind? When will I learn that there is no compulsion, in law or ethics, that forces me to accept humiliation, uncertainty and despair. Have I perhaps accepted it because I have a subconsci...	Bettina	8	553	Sep 12, 2013 by Melly1248
	Letting Go of "Mama Drama" (Preview) This past weekend, I decided to accept my friends' invitation to go camping at a mountain camping site that my family used to go to when our kids were in school. At first, I was concerned that going back there would bring back some uncomfortable feelings. This was a place where memories were created for...	Green Eyes	5	397	Sep 12, 2013 by grateful2be
	A gift, from Alanon... (Preview) The greatest gift Alanon offers us is Lois, and each and every one of us... and each one of us matters so much, so please keep coming back. In 2011 A*** and I took a train north of New York and came to the woodland town where Lois Bill and hundreds...	DavidG	5	650	Sep 12, 2013 by Rose50
	I was shutdown (Preview) For the last 2 years, I have been shut down, lights out, nobodys home...... to the point of hardly speaking a word to my AH, not looking at him, and in general acting like he didn't exist. This was not something I was doing on purpose, It just happened. When I did talk, it was sharp and mean, and critical...	islandtime	7	427	Sep 11, 2013 by islandtime
	Something to ponder (Preview) "Don't miss this. Don't miss your life. There's infinitely more than the experience of love we already know. Push against your borders. Dare to move through the next threshold to the freedom awaiting you." (Paula D'Arcy)	grateful2be	10	416	Sep 11, 2013 by PP
	That whole saying if nothing changes .. (Preview) I love that saying if nothing changes .. well .. nothing changes .. in seeing the STBAX on Sunday night as weird and intense as that reaction was it really goes to show me how much things in my little world have changed .. my world is not so little. Those who are struggling through their own situations and...	Pushka	4	441	Sep 11, 2013 by PP
	Understanding that abuse cycle. (Preview) Just been reading recent posts about the abuse cycle. I reckon, we can't post about that nasty old abuse cycle often enough, when someone mentions living with abuse. I didn't understand it for years, I just got sucked in again and again. But the more you understand it, the more obvious it all becomes an...	Melly1248	36	763	Sep 11, 2013 by sweeetr
	Permission (Preview) Alanon has helped me alot, combined with all the self-help books I have read, first hand experience and I think age too I have come to a few conclusions....no matter what I have "choices". Looking back on my marriage and consequently my divorce, I concluded that it was HIS fault that he made...	oldergal	4	335	Sep 11, 2013 by RunnerChick
	I was going to let him move back home (Preview) My 19 year old son came around a few weeks ago...he sounded great! He was his old self, not using (no program) and it gave me hope! Then he got with some old friends slid there we go. He really wants to stop....but he's just not ready yet. He wants to go back to school and go into the navy, but this weekend I f...	Katytexasmom	13	638	Sep 11, 2013 by Katytexasmom
	great book (Preview) Yesterday on Dr. Oz he had Steven Tyler for a guest. They talked about addiction and recovery. He brought on his doctor from the Betty Ford Center. The doctor has a great book and Steven Tyler wrote the foreword. I ordered it for my Kindle for under $9. I stopped the book I was reading and started it. WO...	afglin	1	225	Sep 11, 2013 by bud
	Name change (Preview) I hope this is okay to post here. I am wanting to change my name. Do I have to create a new account or can I somehow change it?	hisimage	2	269	Sep 11, 2013 by newlease93
	Awareness about love (Preview) I had a huge relization yesterday about why I alllow alcoholics and their abusive behaviors into my life. As some of you know I had just left my extremely abusive alcoholic BF that is no in jail for abusing me. I allow abuse as I abuse myself-mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually. I can na...	joker	3	295	Sep 10, 2013 by Sweet Stanley
	This whole schooling thing just got very real! It'a all in my head! (Preview) After working my hinder off to get into this RN program and doing my general eds, prerequisettes and sciences up the ying this last year I was finally accepted into the ADN program. I have been on top of the world! Day one was yesterday and if I thought I had worked hard up to now, I am about to prove to myself...	Breakingfree	11	401	Sep 10, 2013 by Sweet Stanley
	Back and forth - between fear and acceptance (Preview) Throughout the day, I find myself going back & forth between worry and fear for my son to calm and acceptance. Am I making any progress??	Rose50	3	305	Sep 11, 2013 by neshema2
	From Changing my number to making 'friends' (Preview) So after nasty words and arguing for weeks, my alcoholic mum textd me saying she wanted to make friends before i leave so i said i do too, and invited her round for lunch, today she came round & told me how her house was going up for sale on Monday, she's been saying for years she's going to sell the house...	qwerty49	2	370	Sep 11, 2013 by grateful2be
	Posting So I Don't Text (Preview) The pseudo-ex and I texted this morning. I needed his legal advice on something that was bothering me and asked. I told him that I didn't want to talk about anything personal - I just needed his legal opinion on a matter. Since he is the master of self control he was - cool, calm and collected (as much as you...	RunnerChick	11	536	Sep 11, 2013 by canadianguy
	The courage to change... (Preview) a thing that I can. I've not done a certain 9th step for a long time because of the caveat "except when to do so would injure them or others" and so up till now I've poke and stabbed at it to see if I can rid myself of the self resentment for what I did a long while ago...before recovery came along...	Jerry F	10	460	Sep 11, 2013 by Jerry F
	it is always darkest before the dawn... (Preview) Going back in time: On August 10th 1 am I let my mom go. I was up before dawn & there were some dark moments & still are. I am just grateful that time has gone by & I am experiencing the dawn in a different way. I feel very poetic these days & tend to share songs & titles that mean very much t...	Hoot Nanny	2	341	Sep 10, 2013 by DavidG
	My thoughts, Hope Changes Everything! (Preview) There is no change without Action. You can say "This is it Life". Time for me to change this Life. I know I can do it. And then set yourself a plan. There is nothing you cant do if you have HOPE and put this hope into action.	Bettina	7	324	Sep 10, 2013 by PP
	This one hit home ODAT September 6th (Preview) Today's Reminder " I sit on a man's back, choking him and making him carry me, and yet assure myself and others that I am very sorry for him and wish to ease his lot by all possible means -- except by getting off his back." " Teach me to leave to others their inborn right to dignity and indep...	Cathyinaz	3	281	Sep 10, 2013 by Rose50
	Forcing Solutions (Preview) Just for today I will not force a solution. Based on my recent split, I realized the verbose email I penned to my ex was an attempt to control the situation. If I pan back and look at the times we have reconciled, with the exception of ONE, I have always been the one who has tried to write something eloquent,...	RunnerChick	6	625	Sep 10, 2013 by tortuga
	Today's Reminder (Preview) Step One must be learned and repeated until it becomes part of me. Whenever I give in to my natural impulse and habit to take over and to try and force a change, I'm in trouble again. I know I can only make progress when I really believe in and practice the First Step: 1. We admitted we were powerless over a...	Bettina	5	254	Sep 10, 2013 by tortuga
	Fourth step work (Preview) I finally worked out a minor resentment I've been having lately and it gave me the courage to speak up today after taking the time to write things down. I really surprised myself when of all people who ended upon my resentment list, it was my boss. I was sitting down this weekend trying to pull up a new name...	Aloha	7	437	Sep 10, 2013 by tortuga
	How Do I Say No? (Preview) Hello all: It has been a while since I have been on here. A couple of years actually. I'm still fighting the good fight. My ABF has been using for too long. Finally I gave him the ultimatum back in the beginning of July, and told him it's rehab or your out. So after 4weeks of him "deciding" he fin...	faith84	12	623	Sep 10, 2013 by faith84
	My Ex AH is making me mental! (Preview) I generally stay disengaged. Do not communicate for the most part and with the order for supervised visitation he has done nothing for months...and then...it starts again. He goes for 3-4 months of quiet and leaving me alone and not harassing our child and then back at it. I tell myself - you can't...	abbyalana	2	352	Sep 10, 2013 by cwya
	Just sharing a piece of the MIP story and me speaking at a AA convention. (Preview) It was through my journey in recovery, starting in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous, that I gratefully found my way through the doors of Al-Anon some years later. This video shares the beginning of my becoming a "Miracle In Progress" and what it took for me to finally surrender to the recovery proce...	John	7	380	Sep 10, 2013 by grateful2be
	heroin addiction (Preview) good afternoon all I've been with my bf for 2 and a half years now and for a year and a half of it, he's been addicted to heroin. he has struggled with this addiction most of his life. I've been going to an al-anon meeting every once in awhile and it certainly does help...even after reading a bit of literatu...	nycwolf	6	3411	Sep 10, 2013 by faith84
	im growing impatient in his recovery (Preview) My boyfriend has been sober for 5 months now and is really improving thos time. He doin good. He goin to a group session and one on one once a week. He seeing his doctor regularly and being treated for his depression. He doing all he can and is really trying. My problem is i expecting too much from him and get...	lorraine	14	547	Sep 10, 2013 by grateful2be
	They're All In The Throes of Insanity.... (Preview) Don't take what the alcoholics, addicts do personally, three quarters of the time they don't know what they are doing or why they are doing it and if its wrong most of the time they don't care or don't want to care and the cycle goes on. They don't mean to be ugly, they are probably really nice people. But ri...	oldergal	10	518	Sep 10, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	No word from my son (Preview) I have not heard from my son since last Friday. He was supposed to have picked up his cellphone at my place on Saturday and never showed up. I went to a meeting earlier today and that helped to ease my fear and anxiety. Nothing I can do but wait for any news. I am so tired of feeling sad.	Rose50	9	470	Sep 10, 2013 by Rose50
	I Kind of had to put a end to it (Preview) Good Morning I truly thought I could have a relationship with my son but I'm realizing it's not easy if he's still drinking. I went early this morning and left his things ( paperwork ) he needed to his old place and left it on the porch. I didn't want to see him. He has been calling now that he has a charger...	Cathyinaz	10	474	Sep 10, 2013 by Ness
	Grateful today but... (Preview) Its been hard letting go of my alcoholic bf that had been abusive-in all ways toward me.Hhe is now in jail for physically abusing me. He has plead not guilty to the charge and trial is set for Dec 16-18/13. I had been praying for him and asking for god's will to be done in his life. I am enjoying the sin...	joker	6	251	Sep 10, 2013 by Jerry F
	I'm sorry I dont remember (Preview) I am very new to Al anon. I have yet to attend a meeting. My sister in law has attended a few and has been a blessing through this all. I am struggling with how far to let this go before I decide its necessary to leave. I have 3 beautiful daughters, 11,6, and 1. The older two are from a previous relationship. I s...	Mari1978	9	420	Sep 10, 2013 by maryjane
	argument, discussion or standing up for myself? (Preview) Obviously there is a difference between arguing discussing & just stating a fact! I am tired of my AH not letting it go. He thinks that every time we discuss something or I stand up for myself we are arguing. I am so tired of this. His first wife seemed to have argued w/ him a lot because he freaks out whe...	Hoot Nanny	3	310	Sep 10, 2013 by maryjane
	Feeling anxious this morning (Preview) Hello all, I am teaching a class this morning in my home that I haven't taught in several years and am so anxious. On top of this, my daughter is starting a new job this morning and she is anxious, and my cat is following me around anxiously meowing, wanting me to feed her more. I am applying my steps and sl...	PP	17	522	Sep 10, 2013 by bud
	the DANGERS of rescuing and enabling the Alkies and Narkies (Preview) CAlled A brother..... Court went "ok" as "Ok" as it could have gone....He does not have his license back yet, he will have to go to the registry and plea with them, hardship case, etc (re: his work) and they are going to send him to drinking and driving school for free...so even th...	neshema2	6	433	Sep 10, 2013 by bud
	AH will never be emtional support... accepted ! (Preview) My enableing inlaws and husbands AAunt put my son in the middle of adult business by talking about my choice to not him stay with Aaunt anymore when I found out what an A she was, in front of him at the lake a couple months ago. After the verbal abuse I heard from her on my phone recording after I removed my so...	sweeetr	3	241	Sep 10, 2013 by PP
	MONDAY MEETING 9AM (EST) IN PROGRESS – TOPICS: CONTROL, FEAR, ANXIETY, LET GO & LET GOD (Preview) Meeting scheduled in the Al-anon chat room at 9:00AM Eastern Standard Time Topics are: Control, managing fear, anxiety and Letting Go and Letting God The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. U...	Desirae	0	243	Sep 9, 2013 by Desirae
	What happens after I say NO (Preview) My son called. His cell phone is off. i told him that he cannot move in and go to school as we had planned because while I was lining up tutors and gettithat he school packets he was partying like a rock star! I told him I'm doing all the work and that's not going to work. I told him I saw all ths on Facebook and t...	Katytexasmom	6	393	Sep 9, 2013 by Bettina
	And after all that... (Preview) And after all that, feeling all upset and confused, I turned off my computer and decided to spend the weekend technology free, just hanging with my daughter and thinking happy thoughts. So we snuggled up on the couch to watch a tv show and suddenly, there is this terrific wailing and screaming coming i...	Melly1248	9	328	Sep 9, 2013 by sweeetr
	Disturbing reaction .. (Preview) This town is way to small .. ugh. The kids and I have been going to starbucks to use the internet and honestly I have been waiting for this to happen. Sure enough tonight is the night he almost walked in .. that really threw me. I don't like the emotional reaction I had to him .. it's not even the emotional...	Pushka	9	523	Sep 9, 2013 by Zimmy
	Replied to my ex alcoholic partner in prison.... (Preview) My ex partner & i broke up just before new year just gone as his behavior was at it's lowest point. Since then he left me 30+ letters in my letter box & wouldn't leave me alone. He sat outside my flat one day in the garden for 3 hours & a neighbor rang the police. After that i had to report him for ha...	qwerty49	10	349	Sep 9, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	just writing (Preview) I have been on here for some time now and I have read most of the stuff that ppl write about her ah and abf and so forth. I cant say that about my ex because I do not know if he is or not and I never seen the behavior ppl are talking about on here nor has he ever been drunk around me. I mean I have read about the sympton...	Tiff5484	2	359	Sep 9, 2013 by RunnerChick
	lying (Preview) Hi-I just got some great advice from my sponsor. Dont take lying personally. My A spouse lied to me on our vacation but I just discovered it yesterday. In the past when she lied I felt like my world was ending. How could she do this to me???? I am on the honest end of the spectrum. I make a point of it. I...	Lyne	9	796	Sep 9, 2013 by RunnerChick
	Going out of town (Preview) Hi MIP Family Going camping to the wilderness of NJ There is no electricity nor computer access. I will definitely go into withdrawal and will miss you all See you Friday	hotrod	6	221	Sep 9, 2013 by Bettina
	Meetings? (Preview) Are the meetings still going on here! I have attended many in the past. I tried to get in today.I put my nickname and did connect and it acted like it was connecting but went black. I use java. I don't use mirc. LIN	afglin	3	181	Sep 9, 2013 by grateful2be
	Havent got a clue what to do :( (Preview) Hi All Not sure really where to start my husband has had a severe alcohol problem on and off for about 8 years. About 2 years ago he got help went to the point of being completely sober for about a year and then I started seeing the signs slowly creeping in one by one. ~The last two or three months have been th...	beryl80	13	683	Sep 9, 2013 by beryl80
	Changing my number (Preview) i've just received another delightful text message from my alcoholic mother.. stupidly i text her last night admitting i was hurt about her preferring to spend time with her lodgers daughter than me when i have always tried to meet up with her, go shopping, spend time, but she's NEVER been interested...	qwerty49	4	555	Sep 9, 2013 by likemyheart
	CLOSURE? (Preview) What is closure, what does it really mean to us, is there ever really closure when a loved one dies? In support and respect....oldergal	oldergal	10	422	Sep 9, 2013 by bud
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