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C2C January 27
(Preview)
Doing things like not doing the dishes is a big deal in my marriage. I even find myself not doing them even today. It is a huge problem for me. We can make big deals out of small stuff.I didn't interpreate as a sign a disrespect but a sign of neglect. It does no good to try to fix the problem in one day! Don't mak...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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412
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having fun!
(Preview)
I am having so much since I basically surrendered
I am enjoying starting a scrapbook. I have been finding old photos of friends & family & sorting them out. I found cards & other keepsakes from a long time ago.
Then I found my scrapbook from HS.
Another fun idea I had was to have a all-girl...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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245
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One of my least favorite things!
(Preview)
One of my least favorite things about any AA and alanon combined meetings I have attended is when the alcoholics stand up and say "we don't do this to hurt you" and it seems to me like that is supposed to be getting them off the hook FOR hurting all those they know and love.. Well maybe they didn'...
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glad
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12
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524
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Hope For Today Jan 27
(Preview)
Good Morning MIP: Today's reading is about using the tools of the program to help ourselves in recovery and help ourselves stay in the present, not be mired in our past. There is specific mention for ACOA--of whom I am one as well. I have considered how growing up in alcoholism and all it brings has con...
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yanksfan51
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4
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453
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To all our members on the East Coast
(Preview)
Many prayers for all of you and for your families and neighbors, too! As the blizzard makes itself known, I hope you all stay warm and safe, have plenty of food and can stay connected to us, too. -- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 26th of January 2015 05:04:25 PM
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grateful2be
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30
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512
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One thing I don't understand about boundaries.
(Preview)
I understand about boundaries in general, but in some situation, I don't get how that general principle is applied. If someone was breaking into a neighbor's house, and loading all their stuff into their van, I would call the cops. I would not say "None of my business - no one is being abused.&q...
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Screaming Barbie
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18
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827
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My Story - First Post
(Preview)
I'm sure you must get a few of these every day...... here's mine. I've been with my wife/partner for 10 years. I came to the relationship 'innocent' of the dangers of Alchohol, in the early days we'd meet, we'd both drink, pretty much like everyone else. Alarm bells started ringing about a year in when a...
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NobleStone
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15
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779
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first ODAT summary for Jan 26
(Preview)
This is my first summary for the ODAT. Since I have been attending meetings for over 29 years I thought I might try tbis.
It says that family members sometimes come to Al anon out of desperation. They think they are going to get the alcoholic sober. In reality the purpose of coming is to gain serenity &am...
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Hoot Nanny
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8
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549
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Huntsville's Finest
(Preview)
So... here in the nice city of Huntsville, wife came home TRASHED. A nasty fight broke out. She attacked me. Cops were called... twice in one night. 5 kids. Was pregnant with twins but cancer recently took them from her. Huge alcoholic wife. 2 dui's. Whatever. Cops didn't believe anything about...
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AWSmith
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21
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681
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A spiritual awakening re: my relationship w/my daughter
(Preview)
daughter #2 is bleeding b/c she has been working too much..... I called her yesterday to just get udated on family news and she was delighted to hear from me..."mommie, I love and miss you" I told her that i missed her too, but was gonna protect me from her behaviours, but not ever stop loving...
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neshema2
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20
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934
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Oooh, more chances to practice not reacting...goody!!!
(Preview)
Whew. You might remember my house-mate lady person that I stayed with for 9 weeks was having a pretty up and down time with her son etc and unfortunately a lot of her unhappiness ended up being directed towards myself and my daughter. In the end it became quite nasty and, knowing that I had kept my side of t...
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missmeliss
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11
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526
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Daily reading
(Preview)
Hi MIP FamilyI have been posting a summary of the daily reading to the Board for the past few days . I believe it is helpful to start he day with an alanon thought. If anyone else is up early and would like to post the summary please do so. Please note , we are unable to post or copy the entire page fr...
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hotrod
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10
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782
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Newbie
(Preview)
Hi all. Another newbie. In this case, an AW. This is a day, I just want to holler. That's all I have for now. Maybe more later.
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Rumblefish
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10
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467
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if nothing changes nothing changes
(Preview)
I am changing but my Ah is not. I really believe this today. He is stuck in a rut. I am enjoying my friends & he thinks that they won't be there if I really need them. He has no clue about real friendships. Even his dad said to him that you only have one true friend & the rest are acquaintances.
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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504
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Friends who use drugs and alcohol; to say something or not?
(Preview)
I have 4 friends who are drunk and stoned; I have been sober 31 years and 25 years in Alanon; they don't want help or want to stop; It looks like I have to drop these friendships because I just can't tolerate drunk people any more.
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onestein
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2
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409
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To say hello or not to say hello
(Preview)
I have not spoken to the guy I was dating since he sent me a long apology over a week ago. (By the way, the apology was REALLY good although as I've stated before, he is really good at apologizing.) I told him I felt better that he had apologized and agreed with him that now is not the time for us to build a r...
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Bostonpugwoman
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10
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2365
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Today's C2C - 1-26 - Spiritual Awakening
(Preview)
Todays Courage to Change reading is about the 12th step, especially the phrase that says Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these steps. As I read this page, I thought thats a fine kettle of fish! Ive volunteered to do this reading, and I havent yet done the 12th step! Then I realized that...
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KennyFenderjazz
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4
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485
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Good morning
(Preview)
Just want to say good morning to all hope you stay safe keep warm and get everything you Need I'm so grateful to be alive today and happy and life is what you make of it .if you don't like it change it you have that option to do so just drop it off give it to god . Live for yourself today because you count
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Wisdom67
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4
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251
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Good Sunday morning
(Preview)
Just checking in to say hello . Still looking for work still keeping my spirits up . Glad today is a new day I'm grateful for what God has given me , I did makes some minor changes, I did get rid of ppl who were not good for me to.be around there true color final peeked threw and my head is clear now , I able to see t...
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Wisdom67
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5
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250
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Do you worry that you'll stop caring?
(Preview)
This is my first post. I've been trying to figure out why I am struggling with removing myself from the situations my husband's drinking creates. Why I feel the need to constantly text or call to make sure he's okay and beg him not to drive. Or why I beg him constantly to stop or point out how this is hu...
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mlang
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13
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779
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Responses to this complaint?
(Preview)
My AH is obsessed with the fact we haven't been intimate for a long time. This week, he has started saying "it's been 100 days" and he is saying it over and over... linking it to other things... like maybe he would do more errands if he had sex more often. Or whatever. About 100 days ago, he cros...
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oceanpine
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18
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770
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I don't have time for this....
(Preview)
I have my advanced skills final tomorrow morning and wanted to practice at the college lab today, but woke up nauseous and very dizzy along with light headed. I went to the urgent care and the Dr. thinks I have an inner ear infection, so he put me on an antibiotic and something for the dizzy spells. I reall...
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Breakingfree
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21
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867
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a part of a joke
(Preview)
The best part of waking up is soldiers in your cup! That is the punch line. Can't remember the rest of the joke.
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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242
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Not even drinking
(Preview)
Hello - I'm new to this group and not even sure this is where I'm meant to be. My partner doesn't drink. He hasn't drunk for 2 years. He stopped himself because he knew he couldn't handle it and hasn't attended more than a couple of AA meetings. He says he doesn't need them. However, he has pretty severe...
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gillygilly
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9
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525
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I am so done with crap!!!!
(Preview)
I try to be a good person and I want to be treated with respect.I have been having some problems with my landlord, she doesn't want to fix things.I had a leak in my hot water tank which resulted in a bad mold problem in and around a cabinet,it could also be behind the cabinet or under the floor,she told me t...
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mjferg
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15
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979
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Off "center" !
(Preview)
As posted today... I have a right to want what I want and feel the way I feel. I do not have to act on those feelings but I do not have to hide them from myself as they are part of me. I'm feeling a good bit "slippery" lately - meaning I'm feeling self pity, it maybe my biggest flaw-or rather greates...
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glad
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4
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458
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involuntary committal of a sibling
(Preview)
I'm struggling with whether to commit my brother. He is 51 and has been in residential treatment twice over the past 5 years. He lives alone, is unemployed, his house is out of control and is declining steadily. He falls a a lot and is bruised all over his body. He also has a history of seizures relate...
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sadsister1979
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4
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459
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C2C ODAT thoughts for 1-25
(Preview)
Thought provoking readings today in both the C2C and ODAT Courage to Change speaks about keeping the focus on others and not paying attention to our own needs and wants. It points out that we neglected ourselves because we did not think we were worthy and did want others to see us as we were. I can id...
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hotrod
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6
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347
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I am feeling lonely
(Preview)
This morning I am feeling lonely. No one is up. Slept bad because my thoughts were racing. Now I have to face another day. I think I am going to try to organize some stuff & declutter my mind. Good day is yet to come if I let it.
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Hoot Nanny
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7
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456
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UGH! More frustration
(Preview)
Without going into a long story, I just want to vent over the fact that now my AH claims he wants to buy a house. 3 days ago he wanted to stay here and buy me out. I found a rental, they are willing to work with my unemployed self, and I was ready to sign the lease today and now AH throws out the, "I've foun...
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andromeda
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28
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678
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How do you get out of a relationship with a dry drunk
(Preview)
I need some advice on how to break away from a dry drunk does it have to be really bad or can I gradually stop it.
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Helpangel
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8
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506
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feeling some anxiety
(Preview)
I received a text from my daughter-in-law last night,my son left her and is asking for a divorce.They have 2 kids.She is hurting so bad,I really feel for her.I love them both and I told her I will be here for both of them.There aren't any bad feelings between us and I know I will be able to see my grandchil...
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mjferg
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3
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268
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From immoble to banana splits
(Preview)
on December 8th when I drug myself to the clinic hardly able to walk...needed help in the clinic to get around and to get up on the table, etc., for my exam, and finally got that shot in the muscle to put me out of my pain, the doctor while examining me said that that was one of the worst lower back muscle seizu...
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neshema2
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9
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579
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Overview of C2C and ODAT Reading 1-24
(Preview)
C2C January 24 is a powerful page that reflects on the topic of Feelings. It stresses the importance of really feeling our feelings and not pretending. It suggests that we learn how to be honest with ourselves and stop trying to fit into someone else mold. It asos points out that Al-Anon doe...
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hotrod
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6
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584
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AH sober 50 days but sleep all the time and then complains the rest
(Preview)
hi all! I need some advice on how to detach from my ah who is 50 days sober but is hard to deal with. He works where I work yet goes in late all time complaining he can't sleep and then whines a lot about how he hates going to meetings all the time. If I don't say anything he gets mad if I do he gets mad. This recover...
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Helpangel
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17
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1042
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My Reality is Skewed
(Preview)
A posting from Andromeda reminded me of something. I played bass in a band until a couple of years ago where our keyboard player wrote a lot of originals. One of my favorites was a song called "My Reality is Skewed", it is about how our realities are skewed because we are spiritual beings in a...
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KennyFenderjazz
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5
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663
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Walking in the truth takes a while to learn but so worth it!
(Preview)
I remember being all obsessed with the alcoholic and going on and on about how he was doing and someone saying to me, ok but how are YOU doing? ...That really sat be back a bit.. like a "cow looking at a new gate" is what we might say here in Texas. What did that mean "How was I doing" I'...
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glad
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8
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575
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What am I grateful for TODAY????
(Preview)
Grateful challenge for Saturday.....I am grateful for the following: The lessons I learned about perseverance and keeping up the work and giving outcome over to HP That I came clean with my High School classmates about my being bullied and shamed b/c I had a terrible family and now they are reaching o...
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neshema2
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12
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673
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Feeling Frustrated and Being Negative ALL OF THE TIME!
(Preview)
So as you may know, my AH (who is partial denial) stopped drinking for 30 days on his own to prove to me that he "doesn't have a problem." You and I know that this won't work. What I find is that even though he is currently sober and a dry drunk, I keep treating him like he is still drinking. I feel li...
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flagbabe83
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7
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574
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Donations for site funding and Board Moderator Request
(Preview)
This time of year is when everything comes due on the web sites annual expenses, so if you have the ability please consider making a 5-10 dollar donation to help offset the cost of this site. It is important that the site remains self supporting through its member contributions, and the burden of expe...
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John
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14
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728
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Here we go again, just trying to hang on to my sanity
(Preview)
It has been a very trying week. As I expected daughter lost job ( the 3rd ) in two months for I guess not showing up the next day I don't really know. I have been nutso worrying about her. Trying very hard to read my books and messages here and praying furiously to my hp to help me and her and attend online me...
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serenity47
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9
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387
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a work in progess
(Preview)
It is bad enough that I am bone tired.I am still rechecking my every move. I think I ccan handle this one day at a time. It has been years since he left me on a total episode. For those who don't knowh has bp gambling addict & alcoholic. He has been sober years away from gambling & drinking & quit...
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Hoot Nanny
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0
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176
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New Wife - Boundaries
(Preview)
I already know what I'm going to do .. lol .. I guess I just need to read it and think for a min about it. My children are on her insurance now, I don't care I'm just glad they finally have insurance. Honestly it costs her nothing more so it's all good. XAH has insurance however not under her policy. So he h...
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SerenityRUS
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4
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428
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stranded but not really: staying home
(Preview)
I am concerned because we have to get an alternator for our car & we have to spend more time together. I won't project but I hope we get along after having all these episodes. I will call a friend in the program if I need to & pray. I am just grateful for yesterday because we didn't argue & have a s...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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325
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How to find a sponsor
(Preview)
Ive found lots of encouragement and hope in the posts on this board but am now serious about taking things to the next level. I cant seem to follow the step board and think I would probably work my program best with some help. I go to meetings once a week because thats all my schedule will allow. Its always a...
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Hopefull15
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5
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708
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Learning to have a life
(Preview)
Something Alanon has taught me is how to have a life as I really did not. I was teased at last nights meeting that I hadn't been coming to due to scheduling conflicts that I finally showed up .. lol. Well, part of the wonderful part of Alanon is learning to live the life I have vs just talking about it. My k...
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SerenityRUS
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0
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433
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Happy Birthday, Aquamom
(Preview)
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grateful2be
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11
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360
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Happy Birthday, David
(Preview)
It is January 24th in New Zealand. Time to wish you a Happy Birthday, David!
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grateful2be
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13
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547
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Loneliness and HP's meeting the need
(Preview)
Being retired with no responsibilities has been a new experience for me. It has been a delightfully new experience with many reasons for gratitude every day for me. During the winter season, it has also brought some real challenges. One of them being loneliness as I have been snowed in or iced in or...
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grateful2be
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28
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983
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Newbie needs advice
(Preview)
Hello all my boyfriend finally came clean to me last Monday and told me he was an alcoholic..he basically disappeared the weekend prior and went on a drinking bing, I felt lost... I cried and couldn't understand what I did wrong... Well when he finally told me, it all seemed to make sense....I wish I co...
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Abg321
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18
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800
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Summertime, and the livin is easy...
(Preview)
What a day. I had so much fun! And also I was aware of the fact that I was having fun and the huge contrast to myself even 12 months ago and I was oh so grateful for it. So I suppose i was kinda introspective while I was outwardly enjoying my day for all it was worth. Daughter's friends and their mother did not sh...
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missmeliss
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3
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600
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ESH and Guidance Needed; Feeling Stuck In Recovery
(Preview)
I haven't visited the board for a couple months. I'm feeling like I have no direction. Reading on the forum tonight I came across a couple of posts that I'd like to quote here and comment on because they touch on what I'm dealing with at this point. Betty wrote, in reference to working Step One: "...
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Spur
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10
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619
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ODAT and C2C 1-23
(Preview)
ODAT for today emphasizes that learning how to use the Al-Anon program, in every part of our life is not a simple matter. The reading point out that walking the walk, in every part of our life, requires more than going to a meeting now and then. . It compares learning the alanon program to deciding t...
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hotrod
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11
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468
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No changes or really half measures
(Preview)
Hey everyone! TGIF.....so as you know I had my 50th b-day on Monday. My AH who has been sober 9 months and who has never given me a card, present, bday anything for the last 7 years decided he would take me to dinner. Good! Nope bad, he came in late from work because he decided to stay around with the guys and d...
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Flower49
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24
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807
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A pitbull as a service dog??!! I cry BS!! Sort of off topic? I need feedback
(Preview)
My lease is up next month on my apartment. The complex has been pretty good...one noisy neighbor who didn't last too long...but now they've allowed a family with a Pitbull to move in! I am so upset. I know people here who might have pitbulls will defend them...but facts don't lie. I don't trust them. I as...
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Newlife girl
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22
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722
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Up, down, round and round...
(Preview)
Things are all over the place. I'm so happy to be moving in to a new place, stressed about the move. Pleased my daughter is getting everything she needs to start high school, stressed that so much has been paid for by my mother. I discussed this with her today, as she as insisting everything had to be paid u...
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missmeliss
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9
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647
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everyone has a story & this is mine as of today
(Preview)
The last couple of days my Ah have been arguing more than usual. I dealt w/ his abuse by yelling because at the time I thought that was the only way he would really hear me.So, I did the next right thing & called program friends, texted & called my sponsor. One example of something he said was that h...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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201
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Change scares me...a new job???
(Preview)
I've been working in the NICU for almost 25 years. My husband got fired from the same unit last March. I still try to cope with my feelings over the issue of him being fired. I still see the manager who "helped" in his firing. I have mixed feelings about it. I was reading online about nurse burno...
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Newlife girl
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3
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457
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Feeling Love
(Preview)
My AH and I have discussed this over the years. There are days we can look at each other and think "what was I thinking?" and then there are days we can look and think "wow, he/she really looks good". When I was angry and feeling like there was 'nothing' there, I would stop and remind...
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kismetstrand
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4
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414
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lies i have believed
(Preview)
I didn't think I could do much of anything, but I am coming to realize a lot of things about myself and that is I really don't know too much about my true self,if that makes any sense.I am in school and making straight A's in all classes,Don't get me wrong,I am not bragging,I am completely and utterly amaze...
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mjferg
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4
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370
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