Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

phinatic514 · phinatic514

Hi everyone, I'm new here, and am in need of serious direction. I'm 32, just finished graduate school, and am still at home because of it. Now, my father is a hardcore alcoholic. He's always been a drinker, but now it's the hard stuff. He has pretty much destroyed my entire family. I truly feel he...

Jerry F · Jerry F

http://survey.brxresearch.com/s3/Al-Anon-2015-Membership-Survey

el-cee · el-cee

Todays reading is about unacceptable behaviour and how alanon helps us work out what it is and then to set boundaries and limits. It talks about how we can stop accepting unacceptable behaviour from the alcoholics in our lives but often we still accept it from ourselves. Our own attitude towards ou...

hotrod · hotrod

Today's reading in the Alanon Daily Reader, " One Day at a Time in Alanon." Is a powerful reminder of how we hurt ourselves more than others while living with this disease and using our old tools to cope. The reading points out that we have considerable power to change our lives if we are w...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Hi all. Just a little update about this, that n everything! I've been a busy bee this last week, not on my computer much. That's a very good thing for me, I am feeling pretty good! That's not to say life is perfect, but I am mostly enjoying it all the same. A has been here a lot this week. Being Mr Sober Superma...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

So I started a new job with a nice raise and promotion two months ago. And, to be honest, my serenity is really being maxed out. I finally pinpointed what the real core of the problem was last night before I went to bed. My new boss is the female version of my AH (RIP)! I don't have any idea if she might have add...

HangingOnByAThread · HangingOnByAThread

Hello all, I am new here. Been asking these questions for some time now. I need some advice as I don't know where to turn, and feeling very isolated and alone. I plan on going to an Al-Anon meeting Monday evening. I have been in a relationship with a self-professed alcoholic for 2-1/2 years. I had not know...

likemyheart · likemyheart

And this is what you get! Tonight we finished off the extended versions of the Lord of the Rings trilogy - we stop them when we want, watch till one of us wants to stop, continue the next day or so until we've once again finished the mass of hours with all the extras. during the scene where Frodo and Sam are aw...

kiowawoman · kiowawoman

My husband is in rehab out of state over 2 1/2 hours away. He put himself there because I left him after I couldn't handle it anymore. I literally had to dump him passed out in the car in a Walmart parking lot and go in and call a cab to take me away and stay with a friend because he threatened to kill me before he...

mjferg · mjferg

I am looking out my window watching more snow fall,we are getting a lot of snow again today.I am feeling like a caged animal.I have been thinking a lot about where I am at and what I like and don't like,I guess it is from paying attention to my needs for a change.I don't really love where I live,it is comfort...

watchdog1999 · watchdog1999

I have done well in letting my husband take on his own issues, but those around me often step on my toes. Just when I think that maybe, just maybe this disease will finally slap him in the face, someone else intervenes and cleans up the mess. Last week my husband went out with his friend and came home drunk....

Skorpi · Skorpi

Apparently, I am being cold, harsh, and unkind. I think I am just being real. I do wonder, when I answer questions honestly, like "Don't you want to take me to my mom's before work?" (No, I don't. Your mom isn't home, and taking you there before work means I have to pick you up after work. It add...

Rose50 · Rose50

I have been lurking and reading but haven't posted in quite some time. There have been some changes in my life - I met a wonderful man after being on my own for over 15 years. Don't know how this relationship will unfold but I am very happy with the direction this is taking. I decided to take early retiremen...

AliceinWonderland · AliceinWonderland

Please shed some light on this. Sometimes when my husband and I have arguments, I cry a lot (hard). I end up feeling very sorry for myself and I end up thinking he is the worst person in the world. I go to the extremes and I end up feeling like I'm a victim and he is a horrible person. When I'm crying, he see...

havingablast · havingablast

Hi Everyone. This is my first time posting, though I've been browsing and reading for a few weeks now, and decided it was finally time to start taking part. My boyfriend of 6 months is an alcoholic. He went to a rehab clinic 6 or 7 years ago, and was sober for less than a year before relapsing. Since we'...

texasgal · texasgal

I talked with a couple of program friends. I was crying a lot yesterday. Everyone said basically the same thing as everyone here on the boards. I talked with him last night. I explained how the trust I had was no longer their. He said he was going to still love me no matter what I decided. I said my decision i...

Smiley99 · Smiley99

My husband is a constant drinker. He does not go a day without at least having a few beers. I'm pretty sure he sneaks beers in the mornings and at other inappropriate times during the day. He seems to secretly binge drink hard liquor in cycles, usually on the weekends every month or so. That is when i...

Claddagh7 · Claddagh7

Hi, Im new to this site. I was turned on to it by a friend of mine. I think she is worried about me and the toll alcohol is taking on my life. I dont drink - at least not often. Maybe a glass of wine at a party, but its not me thats causing all the hurt. Its my parents. They divorced a few years ago but they both have p...

Sionna · Sionna

Hi, I'm new to these boards. I've tried posting a few times but always end up rambling on and on and losing my train of thought. Basically, I can't be @rsed with the hassle of coming from my family any more. My dad is the alcoholic, he and mum are separated now, they're both 65. I'm 36 (woman) and I've one you...

ilc0013 · ilc0013

Hello All, I have been dating an alcoholic for over 7 years. It has been off and on. I have been attending meetings 3-4 times a week. However, I am interested in obtaining sponsorship.

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

The whole issue of I make plans and God laughs completely applies here .. LOL. I'm so sick at the moment and I'm in a whiney mood to boot. I'll admit it would be nice if someone were here to take care of me and just let do me. Literally I have made it through two 1/2 days of work and I really need to just stay ho...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

After all the excitement over the weekend(it is now Tuesday) I am noticing a shift in my sleep & that I am dragging around. I guess this is just like a hangover w/o any alcohol. I am struggling...at least I don't feel wound up & keyed up. I said before that I wasn't going to post for awhile & the...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Well, it has been five days since the accident now. I discovered that the insurance we had was not the "right" kind of insurance, and I have a $407 tow and storage bill for the car. The salvage yard offered $200 for it. At least it is off my hands. And, I fixed the ground in my truck, so now the tail...

Skorpi · Skorpi

After she drove her car into a pole, I told my wife I was going to Al-anon because I needed support for myself, and, I explained as she looked on in disbelief, I couldn't get that support from her, as she was the thing I needed support with. I said I was going to check our local library to see if they had any Al-...

BresslawLookalike · BresslawLookalike

Hello there - I don't know what to say, so I had best start from the beginning. I have been in a relationship with a wonderful woman for the last 4 months, but she has a problem. Well, she has a few problems not of her making but when she finds things are 'stressful' she reaches for a drink, and when she start...

Lyne · Lyne

I wonder if anyone else has had or is having the experience I am. I am feeling so much better most days. If I think about the change, it doesn't even feel real. But most nights, I dream about my A hurting me, drinking, lying, the affair of the heart, all the real bad yucky stuff that went on for the last 10 y...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I caught myself thinking back to her dad in the OB room with his big coffee mug full of beer and being afraid of him holding her. And so many other memories of being afraid of leaving him with her while I had to go to work in the evening after he got home during her toddler years. Most of her life and my memories...

el-cee · el-cee

This book has the adult child in mind. Todays reading talks about having a hole in our hearts from childhood, growing up with alcoholic parents, and thinking others will fill it, including the alcoholic husband. The reading talks about how working the alanon program can free us from secrets of our...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi MIP family I have just returned. Thanks you so much for your many prayers and warm wishes. With the passing of my brother, in addition to 15 foot waves and a bout of sea sickness, I still managed to have a good and relaxing time. Thanks to alanon tools and much prayer. Looks as if you are all stil...

clarkangel · clarkangel

Hi every one, Iam new to this site and Al-Anon. I met my partner three and a half years ago. He had been in recovery for two years. He had a dual addiction drink and cocaine. He was a lovely partner but very hard work mood wise very up and down. I started to read the signs of him being moody very self absor...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t59654077/alanon-tradition-2/Please

Brooke G · Brooke G

Hi everyone. I'm the wife of an alcoholic with complex issues; survivor of childhood abuse and emotional neglect...probably same old story, struggling to know what to do/say/think/feel. I have two young boys, the eldest is 9 and the youngest is 4, I try to get on with life for the most part, but after...

mjferg · mjferg

Winter is taking a toll on me,I have been snowed in,isolated, kind of blue.We are really getting hit by old man winter.My oldest daughter had surgery, she is okay ,but I wasn't able to be there,it was right in the middle of a bad snowstorm.I felt so bad that I wasn't there for her.I also received news fro...

lynnly · lynnly

I jump-started into al anon today when I took my husband to the ER for what I thought was pneumonia (bad enough), but was told it was most likely DT related heart arrythmia! We are still awaiting tests to determine if there was any permanent heart damage. I knew he was a heavy beer drinker, but had no id...

Luiza · Luiza

So, last week I went to my appointment with the homeless team and they wrote a very stern letter to the LL pointing out that his illegal eviction/harassment could land him in big trouble and he needed to start correct lawful procedures if he wanted to see me out of his property. If I come to the end of the l...

Jerry F · Jerry F

and guess what I thought and felt before saying I was gonna do that? This is a test so lets see your answers. Remember "He's got a lot of time in" and "Progress not Perfection" along with your own experiences. Ready GO!! No time limit or ESH limit. ((((Hugs)...

andromeda · andromeda

Ok, so what's wrong with me? I was expecting a huge wash of emotions once I moved out. I got nothing. No tears. The only feelings I've had have been joy, peace, and 'ah, I can breathe again'. I can't tell you all how wonderful it is to not be woken up in the middle of the night by a stumbling drunk, to not h...

hotrod · hotrod

I am at sea Just heard my brother passed last night Please remember us in your prayers.

el-cee · el-cee

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCkLYr8OlFY

New Member on vearge of intervention · LovingHim

This is my 1st post and I have fought this battle for year of ups and downs. The man I love most in this world is an alcoholic and I have finally realized without intervention I will loose him and may loose him in the intervention process anyway. Almost 3 years ago I broke every bottle of alcohol in our hom...

texasgal · texasgal

Last night was a bad night. I have been dating a man for 4 and a half months. And last night after dinner we went to his house to watch a movie and 5 min after we got their a woman came ringing the doorbell and knocking like a mad woman. She said she had slept with him this weekend. He has a son and has custody ever...

Floyd · Floyd

my wife started drinking heavily! she would drink until she passed out! always around our 16yr old daughter, I talked and asked her to stop and get help! but she refused! I asked to leave and think things thru. no matter how hard I tried no matter how I pleaded for her to get help it just got worse! now she is...

sweet potato · sweet potato

Hi everyone. I am new to this board and new to this disease my 34 year old married son is a drug and alcohol addict that has been in recovery since november for the first time WE recently discovered he had a relapse.. covering it up quite well but the lies caught up with him. Hubby and went to our first al ano...

LovingHim · LovingHim

It is no surprise to my husband that I hate his drinking! He will start in about 7pm with, your not talking to me because I am drinking! I only discuss alcohol when he is sober, but I joined the forum yesterday and have found a local chapter in my home town! Do I tell him I'm going??? I am looking for a coun...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I just tried to end my relationship with my ah who is 80 days sober and is a dry drunk. God help me I tried and then when he started flipping out I backed down and told him I don't want to live like this anymore and that every 10 days he picks a fight. How do u do this? Does it have to end so badly? How do you do it when...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi Everyone It's been a while since I have posted and this is really not about alcoholism or the problems it brought me but here go's. I'm anxious, lost and scared of things I can't control. My son is safe but I have been thinking about him getting out next year. My SO is retiring and the money will be cut...

el-cee · el-cee

Today's reading is all about courtesy and how a couples 'intense involvement' with each other and 'violent quarrels' can destroy what should be a 'sacred relationship' The reading reminds us that a simple thing like courtesy can be like magic, it can take 'the wind out of the sails of the attacker.'...

christinek61 · christinek61

Hi,I feel like the only way I can maintain joy is to give up and just stay away from this person long enough to stop aching and start living. ten years of roller coaster with my adult daughter has been exhausting and as I hear from yet another affected person (they always end up calling me) expressing conc...

Lyne · Lyne

So I had my lovely day yesterday with family. It was so cold outside here in NY, we were walking fast to the restaurant. But not my A. A is so overweight and body is hurting so she was way back. First my brother walked with her and then I took a turn. I mean, it was below zero with the windchill. Fast forw...

Exhausted33 · Exhausted33

This is my first post. My Mom is an alcoholic and has been all my life. She has had sporadic periods of sobriety over the years. Her cycle is to drink until disaster strikes, get into treatment, stay sober long enough to start earning some trust back and then start drinking secretly. I always find ou...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good Morning MIP: The first paragraph in today's reading is about negative attitudes. The example given is if you hear 9 compliments and 1 insult, the focus is put on the insult. It reminds me of how difficult is to just say 'thank you' when someone gives a compliment. I notice that for me I often eith...

tornadoj · tornadoj

Hi, everyone! I'm new to this chat site but not to AlAnon--have been a grateful member for 3+ years and am happy to be here. Because of where I live, it has been hard to get to meetings, but I miss my AlAnon community and support and am so thankful for this venue. I'm writing today because I need help dealin...

mastiff · mastiff

Hi all, Funny thing happened this past weekend..... My parents were down visiting, and as many a story's go, my mom and I can have friction from time to time. She is an ACOA, and was raise in a very abusive (every sort) home. The aftermath of which has left her with a lot of fear in her...

Jeri Kat · Jeri Kat

My sister is an alcoholic (never agreed to treatment) and her ex-husband is verbally abusive. Neither is better than the other. They have two children (both about 10 years old). The children are tossed back and forth between two unhappy houses and I can't stand to watch it any more. Today, the old...

Helpangel · Helpangel

I realized something alarming today. My dry drunk husband of about 80 days sober was watching my daughter play on a snow hill as I was sitting the opposite direction. He stormed out the door and I followed he started yelling at my daughter that she kicked a boy in the head. My daughter lied and said she did...

el-cee · el-cee

At the weekend i was told about a young woman, only 35, who is a chronic alcoholic. She has lost her job, her home, lives with her mother and is so bad she cant go up stairs to her room so sleeps on the couch. She is wetting herself and cant get up when she falls. It sounds really bad. I went into panic mode upon h...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

THE PAST MONTH HAS BEEN HELL FOR ME. AH DRINKING ALMOST KILLED HIM. THERE WERE HOSPITAL STAYS,JAIL STAYS FOR DOMESTIC,ETC BANK ACCOUNTS NEARLY EMPTY THATS HIM FOR ME PAIN,ANQUISH EXHAUSTION ANGRER RESOLVE, TRYING TO FIQUIRE OUT WHETER TO LEAVE, TO FIND A LIVING SITUATION LESS EXPENSIVE CLOSER TO R...

Lyne · Lyne

For the first time in maybe 10-15 years, I was not depressed on Val. Day, because my marriage is so disappointing. Been there, done that! Thanks to Alanon, I had no expectations to be ruined! I was actually surprised that my A got me two very nice gifts! I have been practicing detachment, not being c...

el-cee · el-cee

Todays reading tells us that alcoholism is a disease. Not a 'respectable' disease with germs that we can accept but it is a disease. When we are able to accept it is a disease then we make progress. We dont repond to someone who is sick with frustration and rage so accepting alcoholism is a disease helps u...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Don't know if this a relapse of what was ailing us a couple weeks ago or something else. I didn't get any support at the VA and ended up in the trauma center. Headaches and dizziness and nausea and wild thinking and neck pains and more so I listened to my wife (lol) and she drove me to the TC. Funny how o...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	In need of direction (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm new here, and am in need of serious direction. I'm 32, just finished graduate school, and am still at home because of it. Now, my father is a hardcore alcoholic. He's always been a drinker, but now it's the hard stuff. He has pretty much destroyed my entire family. I truly feel he...	phinatic514	11	648	Feb 22, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	Should you care (Preview) http://survey.brxresearch.com/s3/Al-Anon-2015-Membership-Survey	Jerry F	5	474	Feb 22, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	c2c feb 20th unacceptable behaviour (Preview) Todays reading is about unacceptable behaviour and how alanon helps us work out what it is and then to set boundaries and limits. It talks about how we can stop accepting unacceptable behaviour from the alcoholics in our lives but often we still accept it from ourselves. Our own attitude towards ou...	el-cee	6	798	Feb 22, 2015 by Debb
	ODAT Daily Reading for 2-21 (Preview) Today's reading in the Alanon Daily Reader, " One Day at a Time in Alanon." Is a powerful reminder of how we hurt ourselves more than others while living with this disease and using our old tools to cope. The reading points out that we have considerable power to change our lives if we are w...	hotrod	2	2956	Feb 22, 2015 by Debb
	Updates, boundaries and other stuff. (Preview) Hi all. Just a little update about this, that n everything! I've been a busy bee this last week, not on my computer much. That's a very good thing for me, I am feeling pretty good! That's not to say life is perfect, but I am mostly enjoying it all the same. A has been here a lot this week. Being Mr Sober Superma...	missmeliss	13	825	Feb 22, 2015 by DavidG
	The Light Bulb Came On- My New Boss is My AH Incarnated! (Preview) So I started a new job with a nice raise and promotion two months ago. And, to be honest, my serenity is really being maxed out. I finally pinpointed what the real core of the problem was last night before I went to bed. My new boss is the female version of my AH (RIP)! I don't have any idea if she might have add...	Green Eyes	5	750	Feb 22, 2015 by Green Eyes
	How to Enforce Boundaries and Know When To Take a Break From the Relationship? boundaries leaving venting (Preview) Hello all, I am new here. Been asking these questions for some time now. I need some advice as I don't know where to turn, and feeling very isolated and alone. I plan on going to an Al-Anon meeting Monday evening. I have been in a relationship with a self-professed alcoholic for 2-1/2 years. I had not know...	HangingOnByAThread	14	9298	Feb 22, 2015 by GreenerGal
	Leave me alone to think........... (Preview) And this is what you get! Tonight we finished off the extended versions of the Lord of the Rings trilogy - we stop them when we want, watch till one of us wants to stop, continue the next day or so until we've once again finished the mass of hours with all the extras. during the scene where Frodo and Sam are aw...	likemyheart	7	739	Feb 21, 2015 by el-cee
	Husband in rehab until early March. New here and need support. (Preview) My husband is in rehab out of state over 2 1/2 hours away. He put himself there because I left him after I couldn't handle it anymore. I literally had to dump him passed out in the car in a Walmart parking lot and go in and call a cab to take me away and stay with a friend because he threatened to kill me before he...	kiowawoman	16	961	Feb 21, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	restless and longing for adventure (Preview) I am looking out my window watching more snow fall,we are getting a lot of snow again today.I am feeling like a caged animal.I have been thinking a lot about where I am at and what I like and don't like,I guess it is from paying attention to my needs for a change.I don't really love where I live,it is comfort...	mjferg	3	851	Feb 21, 2015 by Mirandac
	"Third Party" enablers (Preview) I have done well in letting my husband take on his own issues, but those around me often step on my toes. Just when I think that maybe, just maybe this disease will finally slap him in the face, someone else intervenes and cleans up the mess. Last week my husband went out with his friend and came home drunk....	watchdog1999	13	1180	Feb 21, 2015 by pinkchip
	Needing Strength Today (Preview) Apparently, I am being cold, harsh, and unkind. I think I am just being real. I do wonder, when I answer questions honestly, like "Don't you want to take me to my mom's before work?" (No, I don't. Your mom isn't home, and taking you there before work means I have to pick you up after work. It add...	Skorpi	9	829	Feb 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	Haven't posted in some time...update (Preview) I have been lurking and reading but haven't posted in quite some time. There have been some changes in my life - I met a wonderful man after being on my own for over 15 years. Don't know how this relationship will unfold but I am very happy with the direction this is taking. I decided to take early retiremen...	Rose50	6	697	Feb 20, 2015 by Rose50
	Struggling to understand a particular pattern in my marriage (Preview) Please shed some light on this. Sometimes when my husband and I have arguments, I cry a lot (hard). I end up feeling very sorry for myself and I end up thinking he is the worst person in the world. I go to the extremes and I end up feeling like I'm a victim and he is a horrible person. When I'm crying, he see...	AliceinWonderland	7	802	Feb 20, 2015 by Mirandac
	First time poster (Preview) Hi Everyone. This is my first time posting, though I've been browsing and reading for a few weeks now, and decided it was finally time to start taking part. My boyfriend of 6 months is an alcoholic. He went to a rehab clinic 6 or 7 years ago, and was sober for less than a year before relapsing. Since we'...	havingablast	3	534	Feb 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	getting through one hour at a time (Preview) I talked with a couple of program friends. I was crying a lot yesterday. Everyone said basically the same thing as everyone here on the boards. I talked with him last night. I explained how the trust I had was no longer their. He said he was going to still love me no matter what I decided. I said my decision i...	texasgal	6	868	Feb 20, 2015 by Jerry F
	My husband is a rollercoaster (Preview) My husband is a constant drinker. He does not go a day without at least having a few beers. I'm pretty sure he sneaks beers in the mornings and at other inappropriate times during the day. He seems to secretly binge drink hard liquor in cycles, usually on the weekends every month or so. That is when i...	Smiley99	14	1004	Feb 19, 2015 by YARNCRAZY
	I never thought I would need this kind of help.... (Preview) Hi, Im new to this site. I was turned on to it by a friend of mine. I think she is worried about me and the toll alcohol is taking on my life. I dont drink - at least not often. Maybe a glass of wine at a party, but its not me thats causing all the hurt. Its my parents. They divorced a few years ago but they both have p...	Claddagh7	5	693	Feb 19, 2015 by Jerry F
	Co Dependancy? (Preview) Hi, I'm new to these boards. I've tried posting a few times but always end up rambling on and on and losing my train of thought. Basically, I can't be @rsed with the hassle of coming from my family any more. My dad is the alcoholic, he and mum are separated now, they're both 65. I'm 36 (woman) and I've one you...	Sionna	5	604	Feb 19, 2015 by pinkchip
	Looking for a Sponsor (Preview) Hello All, I have been dating an alcoholic for over 7 years. It has been off and on. I have been attending meetings 3-4 times a week. However, I am interested in obtaining sponsorship.	ilc0013	3	555	Feb 19, 2015 by Lyne
	Long Week .. at Tuesday (Preview) The whole issue of I make plans and God laughs completely applies here .. LOL. I'm so sick at the moment and I'm in a whiney mood to boot. I'll admit it would be nice if someone were here to take care of me and just let do me. Literally I have made it through two 1/2 days of work and I really need to just stay ho...	SerenityRUS	2	755	Feb 19, 2015 by andromeda
	coming way down... (Preview) After all the excitement over the weekend(it is now Tuesday) I am noticing a shift in my sleep & that I am dragging around. I guess this is just like a hangover w/o any alcohol. I am struggling...at least I don't feel wound up & keyed up. I said before that I wasn't going to post for awhile & the...	Hoot Nanny	3	482	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Day Five, and thankfully still sticking with it. (Preview) Well, it has been five days since the accident now. I discovered that the insurance we had was not the "right" kind of insurance, and I have a $407 tow and storage bill for the car. The salvage yard offered $200 for it. At least it is off my hands. And, I fixed the ground in my truck, so now the tail...	Skorpi	6	616	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	You have to be kidding me.... oh, wait... (Preview) After she drove her car into a pole, I told my wife I was going to Al-anon because I needed support for myself, and, I explained as she looked on in disbelief, I couldn't get that support from her, as she was the thing I needed support with. I said I was going to check our local library to see if they had any Al-...	Skorpi	5	804	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Never ever thought I would need to join a group like this (Preview) Hello there - I don't know what to say, so I had best start from the beginning. I have been in a relationship with a wonderful woman for the last 4 months, but she has a problem. Well, she has a few problems not of her making but when she finds things are 'stressful' she reaches for a drink, and when she start...	BresslawLookalike	28	1048	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	Good days, bad dreams (Preview) I wonder if anyone else has had or is having the experience I am. I am feeling so much better most days. If I think about the change, it doesn't even feel real. But most nights, I dream about my A hurting me, drinking, lying, the affair of the heart, all the real bad yucky stuff that went on for the last 10 y...	Lyne	3	436	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	My oldest turned 17 years old yesterday (Preview) I caught myself thinking back to her dad in the OB room with his big coffee mug full of beer and being afraid of him holding her. And so many other memories of being afraid of leaving him with her while I had to go to work in the evening after he got home during her toddler years. Most of her life and my memories...	Breakingfree	8	687	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	hope for today feb 19th (Preview) This book has the adult child in mind. Todays reading talks about having a hole in our hearts from childhood, growing up with alcoholic parents, and thinking others will fill it, including the alcoholic husband. The reading talks about how working the alanon program can free us from secrets of our...	el-cee	1	570	Feb 19, 2015 by hotrod
	I am back (Preview) Hi MIP family I have just returned. Thanks you so much for your many prayers and warm wishes. With the passing of my brother, in addition to 15 foot waves and a bout of sea sickness, I still managed to have a good and relaxing time. Thanks to alanon tools and much prayer. Looks as if you are all stil...	hotrod	9	713	Feb 19, 2015 by el-cee
	New to Al-Anon (Preview) Hi every one, Iam new to this site and Al-Anon. I met my partner three and a half years ago. He had been in recovery for two years. He had a dual addiction drink and cocaine. He was a lovely partner but very hard work mood wise very up and down. I started to read the signs of him being moody very self absor...	clarkangel	7	777	Feb 19, 2015 by hopefull2015
	Tradition 2 posted (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t59654077/alanon-tradition-2/Please	hotrod	0	331	Feb 18, 2015 by hotrod
	A long time coming (Preview) Hi everyone. I'm the wife of an alcoholic with complex issues; survivor of childhood abuse and emotional neglect...probably same old story, struggling to know what to do/say/think/feel. I have two young boys, the eldest is 9 and the youngest is 4, I try to get on with life for the most part, but after...	Brooke G	8	800	Feb 18, 2015 by likemyheart
	Winter and loss (Preview) Winter is taking a toll on me,I have been snowed in,isolated, kind of blue.We are really getting hit by old man winter.My oldest daughter had surgery, she is okay ,but I wasn't able to be there,it was right in the middle of a bad snowstorm.I felt so bad that I wasn't there for her.I also received news fro...	mjferg	2	587	Feb 18, 2015 by tiredtonite
	Hubby in ER with delirium tremens-related heart arrythmia! (Preview) I jump-started into al anon today when I took my husband to the ER for what I thought was pneumonia (bad enough), but was told it was most likely DT related heart arrythmia! We are still awaiting tests to determine if there was any permanent heart damage. I knew he was a heavy beer drinker, but had no id...	lynnly	4	691	Feb 18, 2015 by pinkchip
	The move out date is today but I am still here. (Preview) So, last week I went to my appointment with the homeless team and they wrote a very stern letter to the LL pointing out that his illegal eviction/harassment could land him in big trouble and he needed to start correct lawful procedures if he wanted to see me out of his property. If I come to the end of the l...	Luiza	9	646	Feb 18, 2015 by Luiza
	Took the day off (LOL) (Preview) and guess what I thought and felt before saying I was gonna do that? This is a test so lets see your answers. Remember "He's got a lot of time in" and "Progress not Perfection" along with your own experiences. Ready GO!! No time limit or ESH limit. ((((Hugs)...	Jerry F	14	719	Feb 18, 2015 by el-cee
	No tears (Preview) Ok, so what's wrong with me? I was expecting a huge wash of emotions once I moved out. I got nothing. No tears. The only feelings I've had have been joy, peace, and 'ah, I can breathe again'. I can't tell you all how wonderful it is to not be woken up in the middle of the night by a stumbling drunk, to not h...	andromeda	23	783	Feb 18, 2015 by Jen61
	need prayers (Preview) I am at sea Just heard my brother passed last night Please remember us in your prayers.	hotrod	34	744	Feb 18, 2015 by bud
	Lois Wilson Share (Preview) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCkLYr8OlFY	el-cee	1	354	Feb 18, 2015 by DavidG
	New Member on vearge of intervention (Preview) This is my 1st post and I have fought this battle for year of ups and downs. The man I love most in this world is an alcoholic and I have finally realized without intervention I will loose him and may loose him in the intervention process anyway. Almost 3 years ago I broke every bottle of alcohol in our hom...	LovingHim	6	834	Feb 18, 2015 by kiowawoman
	sad (Preview) Last night was a bad night. I have been dating a man for 4 and a half months. And last night after dinner we went to his house to watch a movie and 5 min after we got their a woman came ringing the doorbell and knocking like a mad woman. She said she had slept with him this weekend. He has a son and has custody ever...	texasgal	14	712	Feb 18, 2015 by Breakingfree
	The new guy (Preview) my wife started drinking heavily! she would drink until she passed out! always around our 16yr old daughter, I talked and asked her to stop and get help! but she refused! I asked to leave and think things thru. no matter how hard I tried no matter how I pleaded for her to get help it just got worse! now she is...	Floyd	8	871	Feb 17, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	relapse (Preview) Hi everyone. I am new to this board and new to this disease my 34 year old married son is a drug and alcohol addict that has been in recovery since november for the first time WE recently discovered he had a relapse.. covering it up quite well but the lies caught up with him. Hubby and went to our first al ano...	sweet potato	4	777	Feb 17, 2015 by pinkchip
	Newbie - Do you tell them! (Preview) It is no surprise to my husband that I hate his drinking! He will start in about 7pm with, your not talking to me because I am drinking! I only discuss alcohol when he is sober, but I joined the forum yesterday and have found a local chapter in my home town! Do I tell him I'm going??? I am looking for a coun...	LovingHim	3	581	Feb 17, 2015 by Jerry F
	How do you leave a dry drunk? (Preview) I just tried to end my relationship with my ah who is 80 days sober and is a dry drunk. God help me I tried and then when he started flipping out I backed down and told him I don't want to live like this anymore and that every 10 days he picks a fight. How do u do this? Does it have to end so badly? How do you do it when...	Helpangel	4	1262	Feb 17, 2015 by KennyFenderjazz
	I feel lost (Preview) Hi Everyone It's been a while since I have posted and this is really not about alcoholism or the problems it brought me but here go's. I'm anxious, lost and scared of things I can't control. My son is safe but I have been thinking about him getting out next year. My SO is retiring and the money will be cut...	Cathyinaz	15	745	Feb 17, 2015 by Cathyinaz
	One Day at a Time Feb 17th (Preview) Today's reading is all about courtesy and how a couples 'intense involvement' with each other and 'violent quarrels' can destroy what should be a 'sacred relationship' The reading reminds us that a simple thing like courtesy can be like magic, it can take 'the wind out of the sails of the attacker.'...	el-cee	1	396	Feb 17, 2015 by Mirandac
	detaching without losing hope or feeling guilty (Preview) Hi,I feel like the only way I can maintain joy is to give up and just stay away from this person long enough to stop aching and start living. ten years of roller coaster with my adult daughter has been exhausting and as I hear from yet another affected person (they always end up calling me) expressing conc...	christinek61	6	681	Feb 17, 2015 by Cathyinaz
	Progress I think (Preview) So I had my lovely day yesterday with family. It was so cold outside here in NY, we were walking fast to the restaurant. But not my A. A is so overweight and body is hurting so she was way back. First my brother walked with her and then I took a turn. I mean, it was below zero with the windchill. Fast forw...	Lyne	7	575	Feb 17, 2015 by yanksfan51
	I'm so sad (Preview) This is my first post. My Mom is an alcoholic and has been all my life. She has had sporadic periods of sobriety over the years. Her cycle is to drink until disaster strikes, get into treatment, stay sober long enough to start earning some trust back and then start drinking secretly. I always find ou...	Exhausted33	3	509	Feb 17, 2015 by yanksfan51
	Hope For Today Feb 17 (Preview) Good Morning MIP: The first paragraph in today's reading is about negative attitudes. The example given is if you hear 9 compliments and 1 insult, the focus is put on the insult. It reminds me of how difficult is to just say 'thank you' when someone gives a compliment. I notice that for me I often eith...	yanksfan51	0	637	Feb 17, 2015 by yanksfan51
	frustrated! frustration selfishness anxiety unfairness (Preview) Hi, everyone! I'm new to this chat site but not to AlAnon--have been a grateful member for 3+ years and am happy to be here. Because of where I live, it has been hard to get to meetings, but I miss my AlAnon community and support and am so thankful for this venue. I'm writing today because I need help dealin...	tornadoj	6	3354	Feb 16, 2015 by tornadoj
	What? Am I an ACOA???????? (Preview) Hi all, Funny thing happened this past weekend..... My parents were down visiting, and as many a story's go, my mom and I can have friction from time to time. She is an ACOA, and was raise in a very abusive (every sort) home. The aftermath of which has left her with a lot of fear in her...	mastiff	11	1475	Feb 16, 2015 by tiredtonite
	How do you help helpless children? children alcohol help (Preview) My sister is an alcoholic (never agreed to treatment) and her ex-husband is verbally abusive. Neither is better than the other. They have two children (both about 10 years old). The children are tossed back and forth between two unhappy houses and I can't stand to watch it any more. Today, the old...	Jeri Kat	5	9249	Feb 16, 2015 by AranB
	OMG dry drunk treatment awareness with child! (Preview) I realized something alarming today. My dry drunk husband of about 80 days sober was watching my daughter play on a snow hill as I was sitting the opposite direction. He stormed out the door and I followed he started yelling at my daughter that she kicked a boy in the head. My daughter lied and said she did...	Helpangel	6	600	Feb 16, 2015 by SerenityRUS
	fear mode (Preview) At the weekend i was told about a young woman, only 35, who is a chronic alcoholic. She has lost her job, her home, lives with her mother and is so bad she cant go up stairs to her room so sleeps on the couch. She is wetting herself and cant get up when she falls. It sounds really bad. I went into panic mode upon h...	el-cee	2	540	Feb 16, 2015 by Jerry F
	PAIN (Preview) THE PAST MONTH HAS BEEN HELL FOR ME. AH DRINKING ALMOST KILLED HIM. THERE WERE HOSPITAL STAYS,JAIL STAYS FOR DOMESTIC,ETC BANK ACCOUNTS NEARLY EMPTY THATS HIM FOR ME PAIN,ANQUISH EXHAUSTION ANGRER RESOLVE, TRYING TO FIQUIRE OUT WHETER TO LEAVE, TO FIND A LIVING SITUATION LESS EXPENSIVE CLOSER TO R...	YARNCRAZY	5	699	Feb 16, 2015 by Breakingfree
	undepressed Valentine's Day! (Preview) For the first time in maybe 10-15 years, I was not depressed on Val. Day, because my marriage is so disappointing. Been there, done that! Thanks to Alanon, I had no expectations to be ruined! I was actually surprised that my A got me two very nice gifts! I have been practicing detachment, not being c...	Lyne	6	559	Feb 16, 2015 by Sweet Stanley
	one day at a time feb 16th (Preview) Todays reading tells us that alcoholism is a disease. Not a 'respectable' disease with germs that we can accept but it is a disease. When we are able to accept it is a disease then we make progress. We dont repond to someone who is sick with frustration and rage so accepting alcoholism is a disease helps u...	el-cee	0	475	Feb 16, 2015 by el-cee
	Ill... (Preview) Don't know if this a relapse of what was ailing us a couple weeks ago or something else. I didn't get any support at the VA and ended up in the trauma center. Headaches and dizziness and nausea and wild thinking and neck pains and more so I listened to my wife (lol) and she drove me to the TC. Funny how o...	Jerry F	7	537	Feb 16, 2015 by el-cee
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