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When Lois threw the shoe
(Preview)
One part of Lois Wilson's story is that one night Bill was hurrying her up to go to a meeting. Lois picked up a shoe and threw it as hard as she could at him. Then she said a few choice words about Alcoholcs Anonymours. I have spent most of my life throwing shoes. Any time there was an issue I got all riled u...
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Maresie888
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4
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294
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ODAT in alanon, 6/7, A deeper look at courtesy
(Preview)
The reading for Monday, June 7th, asks us to think about courtesy. In alanon, courtesy is thought to express loving and warm concern for the other persons comfort. The writer says we often overlook this in the home. In How Alanon Works for the Families and Friends of Alcoholics, that author says th...
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Lyne
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7
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1196
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Hope for Today June 6
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on the power of detachment. The writer describes becoming pretty good at detaching from tense situations or arguments by removing him/herself from the scenario and reading some of the Alanon literature or responding to criticism with you may be rig...
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yanksfan51
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9
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260
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6th step
(Preview)
When Betty was active in this board she was very diligent about mentioning the steps. I have grown to really love the meetings that focus on topics. How her presence is missed on a daily basis For me today I have been exposed to a large number of essential workers who have been working under such duress....
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Maresie888
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2
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714
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ODAT in alanon, 5/31, For their own good?
(Preview)
In the reading for Monday, 5/31, the author questions whether we should create a crisis for the alcoholic to help them come to their senses? They go on to say this idea is misunderstood and wrongly applied. They say further that it is not our job to interfere with the drinkers activities, plan pitfal...
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Lyne
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8
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288
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What did I do for myself today
(Preview)
well I am becoming my own auto mechanic on the basics. I had to change out the engine filter and the cabin filter in the car and a very nice gentleman stood over me and watched me do my thing, supervising me and he was very impressed that I knew how to do that crap and that I used common sense and that I looked at...
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mamalioness
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6
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266
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A Saturday share
(Preview)
My life is busy and full these days- at the age of 70. I suffered from chronic pain all of my life. Three ir four years ago i was running to the bathroom every 20 mins. ... The first of April, in Courage To Change -from memory- brings us the three A's Anxiety, anguish and annihilation. No, no no... awar...
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DavidG
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6
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245
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Courage to Change 6/5
(Preview)
Good morning MIP. Today's reading discusses Step Three - Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. The author suggests that this Power, for them, is a presence that loves as is, accepts with compassion on bad days as well as good days. Once we accept alc...
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Iamhere
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5
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219
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June 4 - C2C - Hope
(Preview)
Today's reading covers the basics of the Second Step. It suggests that we open our minds to the possibility that help is available to do for us what we are unable to do for ourselves -- restore us to sanity. We don't have to believe that it will happen, only that it could happen. This glimmer of hope might s...
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Freetime
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11
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845
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June 3, 2021 – ODAT – Personal Changes
(Preview)
Todays reading suggests that if we want to correct a bad habit, daily practice of a good replacement is what Al-Anon helps us strive for. It is also suggested that, "we learn we cannot go on functioning as we have been, impulsively and automatically, if we hope to improve our lives."The reading goes o...
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Debb
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9
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297
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Things I think about...
(Preview)
Hi Y'all... ...I have a sponsee now. In a different part of the country- but we zoom. My hunch is- to see newcomers do their steps 2 and 3 within the group. To find their higher power. To shake down our belief systems. This is not something I am telling Alanon to do! Au contraire. it is just a personal choi...
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DavidG
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5
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245
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Corona virus update
(Preview)
In this past week I spoke to one of my co workers who told me basically she is not getting vaccinated Another one of my coworkers is also not getting vaccinated I can detach pretty quickly. However the barriers around COVID are far more then basic. Wearing a mask all the time is beyond tedious. The soc...
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Maresie888
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6
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269
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Today's Hope June 2
(Preview)
Today's topic is from yesterday's share on today's hope.
Don't just do something-sit there. The author reflects on how hard it can be to not jump to action, to sit in uncertainty or discomfort. The author at times finds it impossible to act because of fear, and equally difficult to sit still. At such t...
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Skorpi
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6
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212
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6/1/21 Courage to Change – Expectation > Resentment?
(Preview)
Today's writer recalls the saying that an expectation is a 'premeditated resentment'. We may hold certain standards as important to us, but then expect others also to hold to them or face our judgment or wrath.Alternative: adjust our expectation of others, especially when we are aware there is hig...
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Enigmatic
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12
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287
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What can I say? It does get better!
(Preview)
Sometimes it gets different before it gets better but it does! I am living proof that the sun always rises after the dawn. It is memorial day Friday today & I already put some special things on my stepdad's grave & it felt pretty good. Of course it is sad & I cried. His wife my mom is laid to rest...
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Hoot Nanny
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5
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314
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May 27, 2021 – ODAT – Getting Our Perspective
(Preview)
In todays reading the author is speaking about when our problems are overwhelming and thatthe fault may lie with the fact that our perception of the problem is the problem!When we parse out and go beyond the problematic thinking we realize that we do have anoption to "Let Go and Let God." Sometimes o...
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Debb
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17
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359
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Courage to Change 5/29
(Preview)
Good morning MIP. Today's reading is about fear and worry. This sentence, "When we anticipate doom, we lose touch with what is happening now and see the world as a threatening place against which we must be on constant alert." speaks to me today. We were informed yesterday that my AH's youngest bro...
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Iamhere
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13
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724
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Hope for Today May 30
(Preview)
Good morning everyone: Todays reading is a focus on gratitude. The writer expresses gratitude for the message of hope in al-anon, for the literature, and for strong and helpful sponsors. The writer acknowledged that early in the program the feeling was more one of defeat than gratitude, and certai...
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yanksfan51
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11
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279
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One day out and we're back to the same old BS
(Preview)
So my daughter who was in rehab and returned home Wednesday is back to her old ways. I was holding on to hope after speaking with her and her therapist on Monday that she was going to follow through. She seemed so sincere. PHP for 2 weeks and IOP after. She was supposed to go to PHP yesterday and did not. ...
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mamamary1964
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30
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884
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A Letter Home- Saturday share,,,
(Preview)
Kia ora koutou... greetings from New Zealand. Today I am in New Zealand's biggest city, Auckland. I tend to call it "Awkvegas". If I tried to find a meeting here- Would get bamboozled in the first ten minutes- trying to find the rooms! 60 years ago most of us lived out in the country and a tangi [funeral] w...
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DavidG
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2
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210
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Hope for Today May 23
(Preview)
Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the gentleness of al-anon. The writer describes a situation in which he/she was told after a meeting that he/she was speaking so quietly the words were inaudible. The writer considered what this message from the two people who mentioned this at the mee...
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yanksfan51
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7
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375
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Anxiety Inside My Hula Hoop
(Preview)
It's a little after 3:00 in the afternoon right now. AH is drunk,slurring and making/receiving phone calls during this. Right now he's talking to his mother. I walked away from his conversation with her. I so wanted to correct his words, everything he is saying he is pronouncing wrong. His words wer...
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SunnyFrogs
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33
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3508
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Courage to Change May 26
(Preview)
Hello MIP! In today's reading, the author shares that they at times have tried to avoid making the same mistake twice by creating strict rules for their behavior. However, it is impossible to plan for everything that might happen in the future, and by doing so, the author realized that they were limi...
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Skorpi
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11
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359
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My F2F group...
(Preview)
Two of our members were in other parts of the country this week. In this neck of the woods- a solo member my sit alone for months and months sometimes, waiting for the next member to arrive. But tonight there were two of us there- and we got a newcomer. In our district one rural city has large Alanon gr...
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DavidG
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3
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710
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Straws in the wind...
(Preview)
The idea of straws and winnowing appeals to me. An image i used a lot in my healing. Gleaning too- from The Book of Ruth. But also that grim saying:- "The straw that broke the camel's back." I was broken and lost for much of my life. So lost there was no way out. I did need a miracle- because I was so stuck....
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DavidG
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2
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191
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5/25/21 C2C – How Are You…Really?
(Preview)
For a long time, this page author would automatically answer 'Fine, how are you?', even when they were not. Some may point to denial as a trait of alcoholics when in fact, we may use it just as much by always pretending that 'everything is fine'.Honesty is an important part of Alanon recovery, and deter...
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Enigmatic
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13
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1300
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Impulsivity
(Preview)
One of my core issues with the qualifier was his impulsivity. He reacted constantly. He was barely able to contain his emotions There is a long list of things he did that brought chaos to my life: 1) Quit jobs 2) Lost jobs 3) spent money (lots of it) 4) Had car accidents (I lost count) 5) Stormed out an...
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Maresie888
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6
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1642
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Recovery song- long before AA and Alanon...
(Preview)
We have two gorges out of this valley, and two passes. We are slap-bang in the middle of this big island. I have to go up one gorge to my meeting- which seems to be going well. ... First weeks- I was playing heavy prison blues in my truck. But just lately i notice a change. Many people won't have heard of...
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DavidG
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5
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1032
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6 step
(Preview)
Originally AA was 6 steps. Bill W decided to expand it to 12 steps In the beginning it was a knowledged that what kept the alcoholic sober was going to meetings Certainly for me dealing with numerous qualifiers but one truly sociopathic one before I came into these rooms I had to trust that al anon mig...
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Maresie888
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3
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307
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Courage to Change 5/22
(Preview)
Good morning MIP and happy Saturday to all. Today's reading is all about the gift of a spiritual relationship with a higher power that we gain in our recovery journey. We come to realize that we are powerless to change the fact that alcoholism has affected our lives. We come to believe that a Power gr...
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Iamhere
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10
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1933
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Divorced finalized and so many things have already gotten easier.
(Preview)
My divorce was finalized about a week ago. Although we are still in the same house (and will be until the end of the year), I feel like this is bringing me to a whole new level of recovery and I am Very happy about it. Now that we are no longer connected by law, I don't have to use any imagination to work my pro...
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Fedora
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5
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890
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May 21 - Courage to Change - Humility
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change talks about the quietness of heart that comes from taking the Seventh Step, "Humbly asked him to remove our shortcomings." Humbly means calmly. It is not groveling, and it is not trying to impress. Humility is not humiliating. It is doing my part, and trusting a...
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Freetime
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13
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1695
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C2C, 5/17, right here, right now
(Preview)
In the reading for Monday 5/17, the author says we really have no choice but to live one day at a time. We can make plans and scheme, but we cannot control results. We can compress ODAT to one hour or one minute, which can make life not only bearable but precious. By focusing on what is going on right here...
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Lyne
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11
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2446
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C2C, 5/24, can we let go of self-will
(Preview)
This reading is for Monday, 5/24. Oscar Wilde is quoted: In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. The last is much the worst. The writer says their will gets them into trouble, for even if they get it, they are not satisfied. The 12 Ste...
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Lyne
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6
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329
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Manipulation and Guilt
(Preview)
Why do I feel guilty when I know I am being manipulated and say no? My situation is making me sick to my stomach. I cannot seem to get it through my daughter's head that the gravy train is derailed! When I say no, she keeps telling me I never help her and curses at me and threatens to start doing illegal thi...
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mamamary1964
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16
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2067
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Courage to Change May 19
(Preview)
In today's reading, the author reflects on a former belief that if they could just find the right words, do the right things, dress in the right way, etc. people would agree with them and they would be accepted and belong. The author tended to look at others and believe that their outward appearances (h...
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Skorpi
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7
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1854
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May 20, 2021 – ODAT – Al-Anon 12 Steps
(Preview)
The author of todays reading brings to light the guiding "illumination" of reading and working the 12 Steps of Al-Anonand the benefits that not only helps the AA member but that the Al-Anon Step program guides the Al-Anon membersto attain the "aspirations" of a new beginning of a better way to live as...
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Debb
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6
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1380
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5/18/21 Courage to Change – Adversity, Opportunity
(Preview)
Today's writer acknowledged handling some of life's inevitable challenges by not addressing them, remaining silent to avoid an argument. Consistently, this lead to resentment and poor outcomes.Seeing this pattern led to the realization that, though not something likely experienced by choic...
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Enigmatic
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10
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2982
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Olive branches
(Preview)
Monday, our state opted out of the federal unemployment, Rescue act that impacted me like a tsunami..I get 3-1/2 deposits left and that is IT!!! and that has to go to ins. (house and car) car reg. it has to go to STUFF so Monday, I am crying my eyes out, literally sobbing and hyperventilating almost becau...
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mamalioness
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8
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1612
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Alcoholic senior wife
(Preview)
A bottle of wine at least every day by 10 pm anything can get her arguing defensive, why is this happening to me stuff stuff falls, things break, bangs knee or breaks nail i work very hard for you and you criticize me. Not ! Taking anything I say as being critical she starts at 5 so how do I limit or slow or...
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Stepaddy
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5
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1755
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5th step
(Preview)
At one time I went to.12 step meetings several times per day. One speaker stated that 70% of persons who go to 12 step meetings never do a 4th step For me the 4th step was indeed daunting. I did not want to.disclose how angry resentful and grief stricken I was. For the past few months I have been in a grief c...
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Maresie888
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7
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337
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Impulsivity
(Preview)
One of my core issues with the qualifier was his impulsivity. He reacted constantly. He was barely able to contain his emotions There is a long list of things he did that brought chaos to my life: 1) Quit jobs 2) Lost jobs 3) spent money (lots of it) 4) Had car accidents (I lost count) 5) Stormed out an...
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Maresie888
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3
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1927
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Abuse - Verbal, Emotional - you'd be amazed
(Preview)
"Of all the things I've lost in life (my keys, my coat, my purse, you name it), it's my mind I miss the most" :biggin: I may have posted this before but it saddens me to see wonderful people here doubting themselves, mistrusting their judgement over and over again so I guess it bears repeating...
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Maria123
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16
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10713
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Looking for a balance between gratitude, hope, and the reality of this disease
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
I've been here before, several times, with some words of encouragement or ESH to others who happen to be on a particularly bumpy part of their path, but mostly I've been here desperately looking for some ESH for myself when the disease throws me a curveball - this in one of those times when I'm looking fo...
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texas yankee
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55
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2460
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Our assembly...
(Preview)
... south of us is a vast farming district.The locals roll their r-r-r-'s when they speak. Humble honest folk. And the groups in the southern city are burgeoning. I am not going to rehearse the topic at the assembly. Stuff there, of course, is "in committee". It is more than possible that someone f...
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DavidG
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2
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552
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The power of a nana nap...
(Preview)
...one of the privileges of old age. I often struggled with sleep and resting- lots. When I was a kid I sometimes wanted and needed to weep. Very much so. But I put so much energy and discipline into holding tears back. One phrase that sits in the beck of my mind is this one:- "I'll give you something to cry...
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DavidG
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3
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670
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Hope for Today May 16
(Preview)
Good morning everyone- Todays reading is about our work in trusting our HPs will. The writer describes having grown up in an alcoholic home and as a result, developed a stubbornness in trusting others, really feeling a me against them mentality. The writer struggled with surrendering to HPs will,...
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yanksfan51
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5
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975
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My Bad - No Daily Today
(Preview)
MIP Family - my apologies - I completely forgot to post a daily today. I offer no excuses or explanation - just amends for forgetting. I hope everyone had a great day - I did...busy, busy, busy yet fun/joyful.
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Iamhere
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6
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818
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Envy
(Preview)
One of my core automatic self destructive patterns was envy My reaction to much of life was to envy others. In particular I most certainly envied the Qualifier. Since they were in a place of numbing themselves I certainly envied their lack of pain. Of course since they took substances they were mere...
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Maresie888
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6
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232
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Good Morning Family
(Preview)
See the wide smile on my face? I finally got a bit of protocol for logging in to this program and it worked.....Had to get rid of the old me (??? really? does that work!!!) and then keep the protocol simple. KEEP IT SIMPLE!!! WHO CAME UP WITH THAT ONE!!!?? I kinda sorta remember something like that...
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JerryF
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7
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288
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Taken from NA just for today but it’s a great post
(Preview)
though this is for NA, I can sure relate to what the author is saying about insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results He or she goes on to talk about mistakes and how we all know how it feels to make them. And how many of us feel that our whole lives have been a mistake. We often t...
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mamalioness
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4
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1389
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Each day a new beginning May 14
(Preview)
Each day a new beginning May 14 In this daily, the author talks about miracles are instantaneous, we cant summon them but they just come of them selves and usually at unlikely moments and when we least expect them they talk about how we were miraculously been summoned to the road to recovery. And for su...
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mamalioness
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1
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725
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NOTHING TO COMPLAIN ABOUT
(Preview)
I literally have nothing to complain about. Even the day is bright & sunshiny & cooperative. The birds are chirping. Flowers are blooming. There is no room for complaints. I am just excited about a new day. It seems like that is a common thread to my day. I just have to wake up & hit the floor....
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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755
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Struggling.......ESH please
(Preview)
Dear friends, I am struggling and looking for ESH please as I feel like I am walking through a minefield that is still miles long. So I have been separated from my AH the last 9 months. I have always maintained the stance that while he is not actively drunk that he is welcome to see the children and he manag...
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Bettertomorrow
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8
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1901
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May 14 - Courage to Change - Patience and Progress
(Preview)
Today's reading in Courage to Change says that consistency, diligence, and patience in practicing the program lead to results -- although not always in the timing we want and not without periods where it seems like nothing is improving. A sentence from this page that has been true for me is, "Just wh...
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Freetime
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8
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772
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May 13, 2021 – ODAT – Seeking Self-esteem
(Preview)
Todays reading asks and answers the question why have we all come to Al-Anon for help. It suggests that as spouses/friends/childrenof an alcoholic we want reassurance that in our "torn down" state of mind we need reassurance that we are not the cause of the drinking. Our self-esteem has been dama...
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Debb
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9
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1430
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5/11/21 ODAT - Let it Go?
(Preview)
Today's author identifies the greatest hindrance to serenity: ourselves when we try to address every action, perceived wrong or injustice done to or around us. A main them in Alanon is the suggestion that, since we don't know what 'should' occur for anyone, we let go, let god/higher power, let event...
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Enigmatic
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7
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1327
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Step 12- gratitude...
(Preview)
...I don't say this out loud at all- but i say it to myself often. At the same time- As I wake up there is always a song on my heart- music is healing. But what I say to myself is this:- "If i dropped tomorrow I will die happy." After tests last week it does look like I may have 15 or 20 years. ... There was on...
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DavidG
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2
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171
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The Tale Of The Two Frogs,
(Preview)
I would like to share this story with all of you, as It has helped me so much in early recovery and still does, when I remember to do it. It comes from a very old Book of Al-Anon Forum Favorites. Here Goes. A Farmhand carelessly left a freshly-milked pail of milk in the cowshed and went off to supper. Two Fro...
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WendyP
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3
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263
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question on narcissism
(Preview)
hi there, hoping someone can answer a question... i've heard that alcoholics are often narcissistic but i'm wondering if it's fair to say that the spouses of alcoholics are often narcissistic? if so, would appreciate any type of literature that points to this. thank you
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jellybeans
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13
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1868
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