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just got a call from AH,he called from jail they got him on dui or dwi not sure which,he goes brian{son in law}called the cops and they got me,he is blaming son in law..i told him that it isnt his fault or mine or my daughters,it is his fault..he said well i dont need to hear this right now that i have other things to worry about{lol know he has worry}he said they will post bond in about 8 hours so u can pay it if you want..i said where am i supposed to get the money to do that,he said i dont know.so looks like he will be sitting in jail till he post bond or whatever not sure how that worksbut he is very angry...but i find that very funny he is angry,i should be the angry for what he puts us though when he is drinking and using drugs..but of course i know how this is going to work,he is going to go to rehab so that he dont get jail time..that is how he got out of it before,3 times before.since the truck was in his name he is the only one that can get it out..but im not worring about it,it is his problem not mine..and it is not going to change my mind about moving either,im still going to go back north,im done.cause with him getting caught and if he comes home he is going to be meaner then anything,i just hope they let him out without bond and that it dont cost alot to get his truck back,so that way at least he can go to work and be at work the day we leave,but of course i can go to the court house and talk to them about getting a restaining order to keep him away from here till we move then he can come back here,i think that is what im going to do..maybe contact a lawyer about keeping him away from here till i move out..i told my daughter tonite that if i could we should start packing shit up tonite and take everything to a storage ubit in the morning,but then i realized tomorrow is sunday and no storage units r open on sunday,oh well we will figure something out on how to get out of here..even if he goes into rehab and gets clean and sober again i cant trust him never again,i would be afraid to leave and go up north for a visit cause i would wonder did he start drinking again while i was gone..plus even when he was sober and going to AA and taking his bi-polar meds he was still kinda mean,took me a long time to see that..well got to go need some sleep..sorry so long.i will keep you updated
of course, you know you can't argue with an A... different realities to the same situation. i know you have had enough. we say, try to detach with love. take it one day at a time and plan B do your stuff.
much love, and i'm sorry for the turmoil cj
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time to stop going to the hardware store to buy bread.
Understand where you are hon, maybe him sitting in jail is not such a bad thing, first of all drinking and driving will end up hurting someone else, he could kill a family for god's sake....and it will also give him a chance to get clean and sober.
As for rehab, until the person wants it and i mean really wants sobriety it does not work...this is something they have to want for it to work, I have seen many success stories...also many people just keep going back to the same lifestyle...
I am not with my hub of 20 yrs anymore, even though he entered a rehab for the 6 ro7 time not sure...just got to the point where enough was enough.....
sorry you are having to go thru this. Seems like everyone wants to blame everyone except themselves these days.
Due to problems my AH and I had, and before I knew better in Alanon, I escalated the situation, my son in law and my daughter no longer speak to my husband, nor he to them. It is very sad, and cuts me to the quick. Just 6 months before the situation happened that caused all this, my AH and I walked my daughter down the aisle at her wedding. I had such hopes for a "normal" family situation (whatever that is.)
even when he was sober and going to AA and taking his bi-polar meds he was still kinda mean,took me a long time to see that..
AA have a saying - take a drunken ***hole and sober him up, you have a sober ***hole.
A lot of my husband's character flaws were connected to the Aism, and as he works on his sobriety, they are disappearing. However, not all of them. Some of the things I find annoying about him are just him...
