The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I'm breaking up with my Abf which is long overdue. I'm upset about the fact that I love his family...his sister is the best and treats me like a sister....and his mum welcomes me all the time.
I really enjoyed going to his parent's house on Sunday afternoons, and just chatting. We had good times.
But now, all that is gone too, I am sad to say.
All because of his disease.....
I'm just resentful and mad with it all at the moment. I wish there was a way to keep them in my life, but I don't think that will be possible. Seemingly he is going to tell them how awful I really am!
You are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm sure no one needs to tell you you're not awful and no one can force his family to believe whatever he wants to spin on them. They will make their choice too. Chances are the A's family already knows what stories he will spin. Keep your chin up.
Peace,
Twinmom~
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"The people who don't mind matter and the people who mind, don't matter". (Dr. Seuss)
This disease is so devistating. For some, all you can do to maintain your own health is to get away from it. Like TwinMom said, his family knows what is what. It is sad that the consequence of not treating this disease is broken relationships. It is all too common.
I have heard for a long time that money is one of the most common reasons for marital problems, but those people have never born witness to what distruction A'ism can bring about.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Take care of you!
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"Good judgement comes from experience... experience comes from bad judgement" - unknown
I can imagine it is hard to give up. Nevertheless if you read the posts here often alcoholism progresses and things get much worse for people before they get better. If you are young why put yourself through that.
I do think it takes a while to grieve and there are many levels of grief. Please come back and share where you are in the process.
Your post caught my attention, because I feel the same way you do. My Abf has THE best family. His sister is like a sister to me, and his parents are just sooo nice. But that doesn't matter, because ultimately you'll have to live with him, not his family.
And trust me, anything bad he says about you, won't matter to them. They probably now how manipulative A's can be.
