The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Getting tired of things today. AH quit his job last week. It was only part time anyway, not bringing in much. Now he has an interview today for a printing place (his original career before he relapsed so badly this year). He has a nice shiner from his daughter’s boyfriend. His daughter and her boyfriend had broken up and AH went to her apartment to get the boyfriend out – he was hanging out and mooching, wasn’t helping or moving soon. Anyway the boyfriend got the best of AH – he even went to the doctor yesterday to make sure he didn’t have a perforated eardrum. Of course he is proud of the fact that he was sticking up for his daughter, but he looks horrible. Face is still swollen, eye is black and blood red inside. I don’t know if anyone would hire someone that looked like that. He said he is going to tell the printing place the truth, that he stuck up for his daughter. Don't know if that will fly.
I told him this morning that he needs to leave. He is not paying for anything anyway. His car company threatened to repo his car, I don’t know what he told them. Thank goodness all the other bills are separate, except the mortgage.
I had to take a hardship withdrawal out of my 401k to cover the last two mortgage payments that are late. Thank you to all who responded to my earlier post about my house payments. I have decided to take responsibility and keep up the payments whether he does or not. I am keeping that house if it kills me. He can leave, I already left my home this year for two and a half months. It is my home too!!!
He said this morning that he wasn’t stupid, that he never went without working. That he knows he is on his last leg, and will get it together. He has been saying that for a long time this year. And he has been half-ass working all of this year! I am trying to let this go and not let it bother me, but it makes me mad that he is so irresponsible. I know it is the disease.
All I can do is take care of my bills and the house. This is stressful but hopefully will pass. I am telling HP that I am a little scared now.
When i had finally had enough beginning of april,i made him leave,i was so worried about the bills ,plus paying a morgage,on a very poor income,but hey i manage it,dont have the money to splash out and buy nice things,but i do get by ,i do take it one day at a time,once i got to grips on things ,i transfered all the important bills to be paid out of my bank account instead of joint,best thing i ever did cos he just spent all his on booze.
It can be done,it just means a different life style,we do have to take care of us
