Hmmm, Well in my real world I have only been able to get to a daytime meeting noon to 1pm on Mondays or Thursday. I tried to make sure I made it to one meeting a week. There are usually 4 people including me. Sometimes there are up to 8 people at times. There have been times that it is only me & one other person. I guess I will be going to some nite time meetings.

I had been able to call and talk to the contact person when I needed to talk. She recently got a job. I recently called her while I was at work & when I got home. I left her two messages with both phone numbers. I have yet to hear from her. This group is not really big enough to have sponsors. Yes I have not asked either. I have given my phone number to several in the group too.

I have given my boss a list of all the meetings days & times in my area. I have asked for time off again to attend one a week. I have told my boss about alanon & my reason for attending. She is going to be out of state a few weekends this month, I am filling in for her shift while she is gone. This coming week I will be working day shift till 4 or 5 pm. Then the week after that I will be working night shift until noon. The man is up almost every hour on the hour during the nite. I feel I will try out some new meetings & times somehow.

The elderly man is having some problems with changes in his shedule so I feel it is better for him to have some people he is comfortable with around him. I wish they would ask the Doctor to give him a medication to control his moods / obsession for not getting his way. (ie truck keys) He is in no shape to drive but his mind is messed up that he thinks he should be able to do as he pleases & drive. He has said he wants to go to the liquor store. He has not drank at all this year. He can get quite ugly & belligerant while in his moods. I would like to think I have been able to calm him down but I have anxiety attacks myself.  I do not know when he was last able to drive himself. I have been there since the end of March and he has not been able to in my opinion. He does not know what day, week, month or year it is most of the time.

I have been off from work Sunday since 8am , all day Monday & all day Tuesday. However both of our vehicles have gasoline leaking from the tanks. Go Figure! We had to get the next door neighbors to take me to my Dr appt this am. Her driving scares me but I did get there and back. The whole family (4 adults) has to ride along. She tries to look at the person she is talking to as she is driving as a result she is swerving in her lane. My A, Tina stayed home & worked on repairing the gas tanks on both vehicles.

My Spleen has been getting enlarged during the last 3 Ultrasounds I have had since May 05. I have a new resident doctor & she ordered a whole panel of blood test. I think they drew like 6 or 7 vials. I see my Dr again in one month. I have no other symptoms for the enlarged spleen other than the ultrasound. I am not worried. I have been thru way worse. I am in good hands now. my HP is in charge. I hope I do not need surgery. :frown:

I've been getting along better with my A lately. It might be I am not giving into the antics or words. I loathe when she sounds like the words of AlAnon without reading any. She tells me how I should feel or act. GRRR I have been reading my 3 books, praying, meditating & minding my own business.  I feel my only two friends lately have been me & my HP. I have a few online friends I have been able to talk to lately.

I got a really nice complement Saturday. A young lady who did not talk to us too much......she saw me and was like OMG you look so different. You lost so much weight. How did you do it? ( I have lost about 50lbs in a little over a year.) I told her I quit eating. LOL I was sick & had to learn to eat better food & get more active. You are dressed up. Your hair is cut nice. Wow! I consider this a complement coming from her. I needed a boost to my ego.

I have removed my " niece & nephews" email addresses from my address book. I feel like blocking them from sending me any emails. I have gotten generic photos of the two babies my neice has. I thought I meant more to them but I feel like it is spam email. I feel like since I became disabled & live on a fixed income (to them)  I no longer qualify to be in their lives. They have become superficial like their mom is now. I gave me neice an email 6/16, & two other dates that I would be in her state , less than two hours from her on 7/26 to 8/1. I got there & finally got her working phone number. She forgot.  Yes, It hurt!

I am contemplating writing to a young fellow I have not spoke to since he was 13, in 1997. He is now 24 this year. I found him while researching the Ga Dept of Corrections. Chris is in prison till 2013 for armed robbery & possession of meth.  It said he has been in since 2002. I am almost sure he has no one on the outside who contacts him.

We tried to help him and family when we lived in ATL, ( we lived 2 blocks from the Federal Penitentuary) We were neighbors. His mom drank. she drank a 6 pack of malt beer & would be passed out when the kids got home from school. His father gambled what little money they got. they were lucky to get one meal a day. We would wonder why Chris was at our house for dinner every day. His two younger sisters were removed from the home & later adopted by a family together. Chris fell thru the cracks of the system. The case worker went to court & told the judge she had 80 children on her case load & could not help them all. Chris basically quit school at 11, he was in custody & attended part of the 8th grade. The scum of the neighborhood got him involved in drugs & stealing etc.

We took him to my grandparents farm to go camping with Tina's nephew the same age. Chris was an inner city kid. Both the boys were asleep in the car while we set up camp. Chris steps out of the car & stretches. He says " What was that ? " Like he was scared. We had to listen, LMAO It was bullfrogs on the 15 acre lake. He had never heard a bullfrog before.

I am giving this to my HP. I do not need him to steal from me again. I believe he did but not sure. He was a good kid when he was not high. His parents said they could not make him obey. He thrived on discipline. The prision he is in is a boot camp. This is good for him. I wish he would turn his life around. I did get him to stop burning himself. He was so good looking he could have been a model. But he is a manipulator too. We have a letter he mailed to us when he was younger. He is good in there somewhere. It is up to him to get his life together or continue the way it is. 

I suppose we all have our wishes for how we would like others lives to be but it is their journey in life they must go through good or bad.