The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Thanks for all the hugs, prayers, and support. It helps soooooooooo mcuh to have a safe place to vent.
Well He came home right before 9, I was shocked to see him.Said the car overheated on his way to his function so he stopped at his buddies house. He tinkered with that car, and it had a loose wire. Not sure what to believe, but that isn't the point. He knows the truth, and I was glad that he was home. Asked him to next time call me. He said he was too mad to think about it. Just told him tonight was in the past, I could understand his frustration, but to try to remember.
After that I let it go. My prayers were answered, so who was I to complain. We had a great night. We both read our books, looking up to chat now and then. Calm and peaceful. If I would have gotten myself all wrapped up, then I probably would have set him off when he came home. But really that doesn't matter. Last night I took care of me, I knew I was loosing it, and knew what I needed to do.
And trusting in HP to take care of me! He always does. I just need to let him. Glad I did last night.
You all are great! Love you all.
Yours in Recovery,
Mandy (Dolphin123)
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"Today's problems can not be solved if we still think the way we did when we created them" -Albert Einstein
Thanks so much for your honest posts... I read most of all of them b/c you are so honest and share your frustrations and how you deal with them. Your post showed me there is an easier, softer way. And it showed me that life can be peaceful, hell... even enjoyable!! :)
I have been trying to work on that with my husband... not reacting with accusations and anger..., thinking before I speak and trying to word things in a calm way that I would for anybody else. Seems to me that because my hubbie used & lied at one time that I treat him with less respect than I do any other person. Sometimes, I'm not only rude, but mean. He has been clean and sober for 3 years now... and yet, I treat him the same way.
In the online meeting tonight, one person shared about one's shortcomings and how hard it was when an AH pointed them out and took her inventory. It made me think of me doing that to my hubbie... how would I feel if I had every shortcoming pointed out -- thrown at me, esp. in front of the kids? I'd be furious, defensive. (Hmmm... wonder why he puts up a wall when I go off?) . It was eye-opening to hear her perspective... and helps me understand how my actions and attitudes hurt him and take away my sanity... and hurt my kids, I'm sure.
Anyway, thank you for sharing your experience...it gives me hope for a more peaceful and happy, calm life!
Glad it all worked out for you and hubby is home safe and sound. You're right, he knows the truth and that's between him and his HP.
Trusting HP to take care of me is something that I struggle with almost on a daily basis, even though everything is going fine. Maybe I'm just afraid that something will happen to upset that.
Live strong,
Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
