The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My parents are in their 70s and I find myself getting increasingly preoccupied and concerned with their health issues. I feel like a child inside despite my advancing age (39- LOL). I love them so much and can't imagine anything happening to them. I would be devastated. I think there is something beyond the obvious reasons no one would want something to happen to a loved one. It's almost a combination of feeling responsible for them and feeling incapable of taking care of myself as if I'm a child instead of an adult. I would greatly appreciate any ESH.
hi Nal, I remember looking at my parents in their 70s and seeing a few years down the road. Those ended up sweet times for me. Through illness they were each able to accept help, show us courage, just a lot of good things. This was weaning us from their heavy shadows. You will be OK - even though it's NOT what you want. After our Dad died, a nurse who had helped him came up to me at an event. I hadn't met her, and she sought me out to tell me he had been proud of my accomplishments (they're mild) and told her he would not worry about me landing on my feet. something like that. I've wondered if she were just an angel and sought recently berieved survivors to tell that that one. It worked. When I would have a fleeting thought I should ask Dad for advice on this one, I'd remember I can't. Then the memory of her encounter would soon follow. Enjoy your time with them and get close to your hp cuz that's going to be your refuge. You'll be OK too. Jill
I am certain what you are feeling is normal. I care for my elderly mother. She will be 79 next week! My father passed away after many complications with diabetes over 17 years ago. It is still hard for me. My mom has had 2 minor strokes since Feb of this year. So I have watched her progressively go down hill. Death is a part of life and losing parents is a hurt only surpassed by the death of a child or spouse. I agree that you should treasure the times you have with them. Because the memory of that will get you through the adjustment of losing them.
