The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
"Today I can accepet myself for what I am because I know that whatever happens, I have a higher power and a group of people who will love me anyway"
This quote stopped me dead in my meeting tonight. I read it and couldn't speak. I later did get my voice enough to express how unbeleivable this quote was. That there were people who could love me for me when I wasn't even sure how to love.. let alone like myself. "A group of people who will love me anyway" I began to cry at the beleif that this was true. I have never known if I have ever felt love, yet looking at people in the rooms, there definately is a feeling which I have never observed.... love. People seem to care about me (and others) yet not care that I am a mess. This a so hard for me to accept.
I was asked tonight if I have ever given love unconditionally and I could not answer yes. The more I think about it though since I have been in al-anon I guess I have begun to love others unconditionally. I never even knew that there was such a thing as unconditional love till I came to Al-anon.
If anyone else has experienced similar feelings I really could use some help. How do I get past this feeling... I guess it's a scared feeling... but it's a feeling that keep makes me cry and I think they are happy tears. Does any of this make sense? I want to love and be loved and actually accept the love of others. How do I do this without it just being words.... how do I get my true feelings to do this?
Pretty amazing stuff this program offers us. I to have had the experience of being loved by people in this program when I could not love myself. When we reach this program our views are so distorted of what love really is and we have lost so much of ourselves that we dont know where we begin. It is that unending love and encouragement that keeps us coming back meeting after meeting. They have something we want. For me it was the ability to love myself.
Recently I have had many trials in my life and have been doubting my senses as well as my feelings about myself. When I am in doubt like this - I know if I share it - someone will be there to remind me just how worth it I am. It is when we are at our lowest and most needy that the unconditional love of this program gives us a boost.
Karen
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Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. Love you all!
Karen
At first it does seem odd, doesn't it? A group of people that we may never have met before, and they love us the munute we walk through the door. This kind of love us something that I never experienced before. I think there is a huge bond between all of us alanons, we just seem to know what we need to give eachother.
Love, acceptance, forgiveness, compassion, and understanding, I learned the true meanings of the words here.
Keep coming back, you are a very important part of our family.
Yours in recovery,
Dolphin123
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"Today's problems can not be solved if we still think the way we did when we created them" -Albert Einstein
Sandie, I remember my now deceased husband would say, when someone compliments you, just say thankyou.
that was so hard for me. I sure do not know why. My family all loved me. But for many years I did not think my mother loved me. Now I know so different. I think it was she was so protective of me, so it came out harsh.
When I was a hippie type, the first time i went and lived with a group in the mountains. my best bud dragged me and my horse and dog up there.
anyway back then we hugged everyone. I was not used to this. We all slept in the great room on the floor and one person would read to all of us. We cooked together, they took baths in the river, I was very modest so not me! lol I took one in front of the fire in a tub with my friend guarding. haha
anyway I came back home to my parents and hugged them. And cont. to hug and touch up until now.
I love the person the creator gave me. I feel warm when I know how empathic I am, how caring, how I will drop everything and anything if someone, even a strange or an animal needs me.
Maybe you can take a breath, mellow out and think of what you like about you.
Close your eyes and look at you, what do you see? I learned to be my best friend. I would ask me, ok what would you do for someone who felt like you do? Then do it for me.
It has made my love for others so BIG. I learned we become NOT critical of others when we love our selves.
It is so true. I can be around the biggest jerk and sit in wonder and look and watch them and see the little kid in them.
My A's best friend was a big arrogant blow hard. That is what he was like ever since jr. hi.
My A was living and drugging and drinking with this guy. He called me once and just tried to tear me apart. I started to cry and said. I did not know any of that. He was telling me what my A said about me.
He melted and was so nice to me ever since. We actually became close, becuz I did not yell at him or argue. I let him know how I really felt.
After that he softened towards me becuz i really listened to him. I let him know i knew how miserable he was and was very sad for him. But I also told him only he knew how to get on program. He was a counselor for Serenity Lane.
If I had not have loved me, I would not have been brave enough to face him all opened up.
Sadly we lost him to death from alcoholism a few weeks ago.
geez I always blab so much...sorry.
Please look in the mirror and find one thing you love about you. Every day find something else. Then change what you tell yourself in your head. Do say I am ok the way I am, I am pretty I am caring, I am strong. NO more calling yourself stupid or worthless.
stop it.
Everyone has worth, sadly some kill it off. Glad to see you want to find you. Care enough about you to give you what you need and want.
Oh boy! I know what you mean! I felt that love at my very first Al-anon meeting and I didnt know what it was either. But I did know this from the very first, they accepted me. They didnt ask me why I was there, I didn't have to prove I belonged....they just held my hand while I cried, shed a tear with me, smiled, and loved me.
I couldn't believe it either. I have continued to feel it for over 2 years now, and It keeps me coming back.
What a wonderful thing it is to get and to give unconditional love.
I know what you mean! When people answer my posts, I literally cry. I can't even finish reading them, through the tears. It takes me a minute to get myself back together to finish reading them. What an awesome group of people! Love you all, TLC
