is not always a terrible thing to do.  I have posted a couple of times about the situation of my father moving very far away.  Two days ago I was all over the map emotionally but didnt even realize it.  It wasnt until after I raged at my husband and said some very hurtful things that I realized how emotionally unbalanced I was over the situation.  I realized that the hurtful words I hurled at my husband were some of the things I wanted to say to my father for all the years of perceived neglect and misgivings.  As they say hurting people hurt people. 

Yesterday, my father showed up at work.  Needless to say I was surprised by it.  I could have analyzed why he chose to come say goodbye to me at work.  But I didnt.  It wasnt worth it.  I took it for what it was - his attempts to make good before he left.  It wasnt as bad as I thought it would be. 

I had done some reading, praying, meditating and used whatever in my toolbox I needed to to get through this process.  I turned the situation over to my HP and left it there for him to guide me through the pain and anger I was feeling.  I am better for it.  And should something happen to my father while he is so far away, I know that my last memory of him will not be one of bitterness.  I will remember that my father hugged me and said that he loved me and that I was able to tell him the same and mean it.

Karen