The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello--Lately I've found myself into projection. Anytime my life hits a new growth spurt, I project. I can't do this; I'll be a failure; I'm going to bomb out; things like that.
I talked with my sponsor and some program friends earlier today about projection and my stinkin' thinking. So I feel alot better. But I wanted to ask y'all: what tools do you use to stop your projection, when you realize you're doing it?
I used numerous tools. Some not easy, and with practice gets easier.
Slogans that helped me: STOP ! Think ! I don't have to react.
This too shall pass, Progress, not perfection
There are many, and finding the ones that work for your particular situation works the best. I had to design a plan for the behavior and thinking I wanted to use for certain situations ahead of time so I would know what I was replaceing the bahavior I didn't want with. And began using it when it was time. Some it took a few times to get a good start and then eventually began to start feeling more normal and then easier to choose to do. I had many doubts with some and some worked and some I adjust as I go along the jurne. There will always be new ones. I have accepted that for myself as long as I'm alive and breathing and live as a human in this imperfect world.
Hope this helps some. Take what you want and leave the rest.
BlessingsStrengthChange in Recovery
__________________
I tell myself when times are rough, "this to shall pass!!!" Ask HP for guidance, if the door is open, and I know how to look, I will become aware! I also visit http://www.inspiringthots.net/ . Blessings , Your sister in Recovery
For me I think that acceptance is a big part of the process that has helped me to keep projections at arms length. Awareness plays a part as well since if I don't know I'm doing something harmful I can't begin to want to change that area in my life. Also living the journey has allowed me the reality to realize that I had wasted mega amounts of time projecting all types of outcomes or possibilities that never did come to be and when I least expected things to change is when they did. Projecting also reminds me that I am trying to force a solution instead of depending on my HP to give me the courage to face anything that comes my way.
I had a real doozy of a time with projection a while back when my daughter's school friend was hit by a truck. (The friend is doing well now, and walked across the stage for her 8th grade graduation from Middle School last week - yeah!!) I was projecting all the "what might happen" to my own kids, fearful to let them out of my sight. FEAR - Future Events Aren't Real.
Someone at my ftf, after hearing me share about all this, handed me a slip of paper with these words on them: "Detach from the problem, but not from the person, the purpose of emotional detachment is to keep myself from drawing into crises of others." For some reason, that little sentence got thru to me.
Also, I recalled other things I've heard here. About everyone having their own HP watching over them. Part of our steps, letting go and letting God, and the saying "If you worry, why pray? If you pray, why worry?" So I had to consciously remind myself of all this and put it in HP's hands. HP watched over me as a child and I have to trust that He is doing so with my own children. I can't swaddle them in cotton wool and never let them out of my sight. They don't deserve that. They deserve to be able to play with their friends and go places. Trust in HP, it is so important for me to have that.
HP shows me things in His own time, when He knows I am ready to see them. I have to accept and trust that He knows what is best for me. I also know He is always there for me and provides me with the "sight" to see what is needed, whether it be by the hands of another member handing me a slip of paper, or something I hear in chat, or something written in a post, or a passage in our CAL... the answer is always there waiting for me to see it.
Luv, Kis
__________________
Let your light shine in the darkness. "I can't just bring my mind to meetings...I must also bring my heart."
I realized lately I'm projecting no end of woe when something happens to me. A minor car accident, I'm off feeling all squeezed for time, all frustrated, all catastrophe and still it's just a fender bender. I am feeling derailed by a change in work assignment - completely out of porportion to what a difference it will really make. In mid-panic, I was able to realize I'm bringing this on myself.
Like the others here, I am now arming myself with slogans. How important is it? One day at a time. You know the ones - they help us stay in the moment. I can't project if I am here now.
remember a little boy who fell through the ice (read about it in the newspaper when I was a little girl) who said he found an air pocket in the ice. That is what allowed him to survive until help arrived. Man, if I haven't relied on that image over the years! Just get me through today now, let me enjoy it sometimes, and either help will come, the ice will melt or ... somehow I'll be OK. take care --- Jill
Tiger if you insist on projecting why not think possitive about it? attitude
I heard a young woman say when she is presented with a biggggggg problem she says
Wow God must think I am strong enough to face this. and puts one foot in front of the other. I like to keep things simple and that does it for me . Louise
Strength
Change in Recovery
