The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
How is everyone today? I hope well, today is Saturday June 3, 2006 and usually I would be spending the day with my A-boyfriend or a least talking on the phone with him to plan a day adventure with him. But today I won’t be, in fact never. As most of you know he broke up with me last week. I’m having a difficult day; I keep trying to find reasons to call him. I know this would be wrong and manipulative so I don’t. My mind starts to drift and I wonder all the time; could I be being punished for not being a better person in general with everyone around me? Including those who are sick (not by choice) like once I had to bring up some issues at work and this caused the termination of an employee. Is this “What goes around comes around” is this it?
I’m so sad and upset, Please God help me get through this, I know you next to me I know that darkness is just for this moment and isn’t going to last, help me get through.
Hello, angel, In my experience, part of the grieving process is to ask: "why, me?" And now that you and your boyfriend are no longer seeing each other, you, too, are in a grieving process. I have also learned that grief is full of lots of feelings, and feelings have always taught me something about myself. You are in the process of letting go. Please use this time to learn what you need to be happy, contented, and healthy. Now is a good time to get to know yourself. I know that when I have suffered a loss a I have always learned some new things about myself. Thank your HP, you are in the program and have the resources of the 12 steps. What a gift! They changed my life. It works, if you work it! Blessings and prayers. Hang in there! mebjk
Change is hard, loss is hard, breaking up is hard. They tell us in Alanon to focus on ourselves. And to get into recovery for ourselves. There are alot of tools in Alanon. Take it one day at a time. No, I don't think that the two instances are related. That might be codependent thinking. We don't have alot of control over anything except ourselves. Thanks for sharing.
