The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
good grief! Is there any such thing? I am suffering from more grief these days & it is not good! It has been almost 2 1/2 years since my husband died & now my relationship is causing me a lot of grief. I think it may be over. I am not looking for advice or suggestions. I just need to vent! I wish I had gone to more al anon meetings before I met this wonderful man. He is an addict of some sort without a program! He is now over 1300 miles away & we are not getting along. There is a lot of mistrust on his part. I am going to share some of my experiences anonymously & stay on my side of the street for a change. I hope I can leave this site with a clearer perspective & a calmer mind.
I am definitely a qualified member of al anon but I haven't been to a meeting for awhile. I am a very lonely young widow. I have to admit that I have high expectations for the man I am currently with. I will not trash him on here. I just want to say that we are most likely headed for a breakup. I am not able to be myself anymore. I might have actually lost myself in this relationship. Right now with the distance we are currently having, I am working on me. I am not going to let all the petty things that are going on ruin me or my serenity. I am not new to the program. I have seen a lot of better days since I have been a member. Today is not one of the better days but I am far more ahead of the disease than I was a few days ago. I am actually really taking care of myself.
I might have gone into a lot of my past with my current relationship. I think I mentioned how much I couldn't believe how perfect he was for me back then. One huge red flag! No one is Perfect for me! I am not perfect either. I just thought love, yes love, was supposed to be like it was in the beginning. I was kind of swept off my feet. It is not his fault that he wanted to help me & be there for me. But, was there strings attached? I guess I will have to look into that. Again, staying on my side of the street! I am not going to bash him. I do love him. Not buts about it. I still do. We have been together for almost 2 years. He seems to love me too.
So, I just want to say that next time I get on here, I will be in a better & more productive frame of mind. Or maybe, a more positive frame of mind.
In the meantime, I am going to continue to take care of me.
Good to see you here Kathleen. I responded to your post yesterday but I don't see it here.
Grief is tough to get through. Remember it's a one day at a time program.
Meetings whether online, in person, or phone, are available all the time. I go to an alanon zoom meeting with a lovely bunch of people. It really helps. And also, you don't have to be in a good head space to write on the board. It's here to help all of us, via ESH. Keep coming back. :) Lyne
