The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I no longer wish to be thought of as...."the sweetest person I know" by a few of my friends. I want to be that mean and evil...no care for human emotion girl, with guns blazing. Maybe not completely. One of the many things I have learned from this program is that, I am only responsible for me.
This morning I get into trouble from one of my two bosses. Well, warranted ofcourse. I had a lady call for her elderly parents, telling me their transformer blew and they had no power. I called my boss to see when they could get out there and get them going again. He said we could do it.....but, payment had to be up front since he has had a hard time collecting from jobs in this particular town.
I called the lady and told her the job was going to be costly. I also told her we need the payment as soon as possible. I didn't say up front. I bill all the accounts and rarely, do we demand money upfront, and we even give them 30 days. I have no doubt she will pay. I still should have done as I was told though.
That isn't even the big thing.
The big thing!
My other boss, has a crush on me. He is not taking the hint. I have even come right out and told him in the nicest, sweetest way possible.........you are married....I have a great boyfriend....I need to look myself in the mirror...yada....if circumstances were different, who knows.....but they aren't....so...thank you but, NO.
Still he will not knock it off! Yes, I know I could file sexual harrassment. I have three children. It took me months to get this job. I just don't know what to do. Why can't I just be evil and snap on the poor bastard....go on about my job which I love.....in tension in hostility for years to come?
Another thing. I would love to hear my boyfriend's views on this. He doesn't comment at all. He just listens. Even when I ask, "What do you think?" Is that his program?
I would love to go to a meeting right now.....but my boss told me he was going to start going since I was. I am the first person to tell you...I will go no matter who is there.
Why is it my sponsor has to go out of town when I need his guidance? Why? Okay, I am going to go chant and rock into a corner until it is time for me to go back to work....then I will chant and rock under my desk for the remainder of the day. Sexy huh?
Maybe I should just draw the line in the sand where it is crystal clear. Give the rest to my HP after that.
Ziggy.....(Still, I think I would like to rock.....would this be considered and Alanon crash?)
Yes, I agree, I do not want to hear that I am such a 'sweet person' again. Well, it's finding that balance I guess. Assertive, but I do think it's OK for me to get FIRM w/someone and change the intonation of my voice to FIRM, when they do not take me seriously THE FIRSTTIME! I just do not want to be hoodwinked anymore by my spouse. So, yeah, I identify with your feelings. And sometimes, I have to go through the frustrations--coping with someone, and yep, no one to call or reach.....I hate frustrations.
