The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This reading focuses on feeling inadequate when doing the 4th Step. The writer felt inadequate about their entire life, that they were doing it wrong, and that their best was never good enough. However Step 4 can put self-doubt in perspective, and give us a chance to find some balance. It's OK to question the things we've been telling ourselves, and find out if these are true. False assumptions may come from habit instead of reality.
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Oh yeah, this "was" me. My sponsor and this entire program helped me see that if I can look at my whole self, there is plenty of good alongside things I can strive to improve. I had no balance nor did I know how to get it. What's so great about Step 4, and I did it several times with my sponsor when feeling stuck, is that I learned to see the good in me as well as my shortcomings. A searching and fearless moral inventory takes guts--we got 'em. We have survived living with alcoholism
Lyne, thank you for your service and share on a great topic. That was a real surprise to me when I worked the 4th step: the emphasis on balance. I found it very refreshing and encouraging, made it a bit easier to work on the defects.
Grateful for the wisdom and reminders
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
