Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: C2C – December 09, 2022


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 916
Date:
C2C – December 09, 2022


The topic of todays reading has to do with Tradition Eleven, which is an Al-Anon policy that describes how

"attraction rather than promotion" to Al-Anon by the membership is its best policy.  How we approach

and/or tell other folks about our participation and why, is best done with the question to ourselves first Was I asked?

The author discusses how if they are "walking the talk and not demonstrating recovery that talking the talk may be

nothing more than a substitute for living it."  They felt that "urging others to attend Al-Anon meetings" maybe a sign

that they "most needed the meeting themselves".

Reminder:  "Before I start telling people about Al-Anon, I might consider posing this question to myself":  "Did they ask?

Quote:  "Example is not the main thing in influencing others."  "It is the only thing." ~ Albert Schweitzer

 

Since I have been a member of Al-Anon/MIP (8 or 9 years now) there have been, maybe a handful of times that I told

someone that I belonged to the Al-Anon.  The only reason was because, during the course of a conversation with them

about how I was handling my life living with an alcoholic in respect to that persons issues, the question was asked by

them to me How did I come by the philosophy that I was imparting.  There may have been one individual who actually

followed up with their local Al-Anon group, but I always tried to step aside when it came to actually promoting going to

an Al-Anon meeting directly because of the Eleventh Tradition.  I never named my group or MIP in order to protect the

anonymity of the members of both.

 

I believe that everyone takes away something different from the teachings of Al-Anon, depending on their lifes circumstances

and experiences and that my feelings/views are my personal feelings and beliefs alone.  The basic philosophies of Al-Anon are

represented in the Steps/Slogans/Concepts/Traditions but that Al-Anon teaches us that we take what applies to our own individual

lives and what is appropriate for me maybe not appropriate for others but that those Steps/Slogans/Concepts/Traditions are to

be our guides. I am very careful how I promote those personal teachings of Al-Anon to others as to not come off as some expert

because I am not!!  J

TGIF MIP Family!!



__________________

"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it

does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown

 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2767
Date:

Thanks Debbie for your topic and ESH. Probably a number of years ago I did make the suggestion 1x to my son that he try alanon. He certainly qualifies due to my A and his father. That is the one and only time he will hear that from me. I would say all people close to me know I attend alanon. But I never push it on anyone. Sometimes I say something like, I learned in alanon to always carry a QTIP, quit taking it personally, when I think it will help them to hear that. But that's as far as I go. If someone asks me to do something on a Tuesday night, I say I can't because I have my alanon meeting. I let people know of my involvement in subtle ways. I only talk about it otherwise if someone does ask, how does that help you? I like to spread my joy, but I have given up on trying to force solutions, thank God. I don't want people pressuring me about stuff, so I don't do it to them. Treat others as you want to be treated, is my motto.

__________________

Lyne



Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 443
Date:
RE:


Thank you Debbie for your service and all the shares. It was the ESH of MIP members that kept me coming back. I was attracted because people we're freely giving of themselves-no manipulations, techniques, hidden agendas, strings attached. I felt seen and heard, and was given tools to get on with the business of living life fully...one day at a time. I am attracting good people in my life . For example I kept a neighbour at a distance for 5 years who tried to befriend me. Last summer while admiring her garden, I noticed her garden stone with the Serenity Prayer and we arrived at a new closeness without breaking anonymity. Anyways, I have to cut it short...on my way out...but you get the idea. :) Have a wonderful day.

__________________


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 916
Date:
C2C – December 09, 2022


Thank you {{Lyne}} and {{Daffodils}} for both your ESH.

Always read a few passages from ODAT everyday and the one that I just read

equated Al-Anon to gentleness. Just love this program.

__________________

"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it

does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown

 

Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.