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Post Info TOPIC: C2C, Monday, 1/3: I can change the past if I stop repeating it in the present.


~*Service Worker*~

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C2C, Monday, 1/3: I can change the past if I stop repeating it in the present.


The writer of Mondays reading explores how to make positive changes:

-ask, am I moving in a positive direction? -am I going to meetings and practicing the principles?-am I breaking out of unhealthy and unsatisfying patterns of the past? -can I set goals and take small risks on a daily basis? -can I take action every day instead  of going on a frenzy every few months?  -can I let a challenge be a new beginning?

Reminder:  No one can make me change.  No one can stop me from changing.  No one really knows how I must change, not even I.  Not until I start.  I will remember that it only takes a slight shift in direction to begin to change my life.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I guess I am putting these ideas into practice right now as I have felt stuck.  I no longer want to be in the down cycle.  I reached out to my sponsor, I took a suggestion she made and wrote about it on board, and Im listening to my thought process and correcting negative thinking. I will go over it again this week with my zoom F2F.  I do want to change and I have started this new cycle.  When I think about all my years in alanon, whenever I get into a stuck place, I do always, eventually, get out of it.  Amen. 



__________________

Lyne



Senior Member

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Posts: 330
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Thank you Lyne for your service, reading and honesty!

I too get stuck and that is the beauty of Al-Anon, the program is there for those

stuck times, so grateful!

__________________

"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it

does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown

Debbie



Senior Member

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Posts: 171
Date:

Thank you Lyne for your service and to both you and Debb for your honesty. I find myself with one foot in the past, the other in the future and missing the present more frequently these days. I'm grateful for this board and shares to begin my day. There's always some suggestion, wisdom, relatable experience that helps me to feel less alone, gain new perspective on whatever is giving me angst. My two favorite go to's particularly when I'm in a slump are my higher power and my in person Alanon meetings. I currently feel very affected by not being able to attend f2f. I realize I've gained strength to face life on life's terms from the energy in the room of our home group, our gathering, the hugs, smiles, laughs, sharings, hearing familiar voices reading the step aloud. Once overwhelmed and isolated by effects of alcoholism, in person Alanon opened a new world of belonging. I miss it. I can count on only one hand the number of f2f Alanon meetings that I have left feeling worse than when I showed it. I realize more than ever how in person gathering and offering support, receiving support has been so necessary for my recovery progress and maintaining my sanity and serenity. My in person meetings have helped me adjust my attitude and go back out into the world with renewed hope and gratitude. I thrive on in person socialization today. That's tremendous progress from my early days of sitting in the back of meetings hoping to not be noticed. But my higher power is always there for me wherever I am - just a prayer away. Acceptance of what is as opposed to how I'd like things to be and thy will not my will be done is a daily prayer in one form or another. When I surrender each morning and just allow myself to be guided, present; I experience less inner turmoil, projection, fear. Many years in recovery doesn't mean I have a fix it tool in my Alanon toolbox for everything life throws at me. But somehow at least in my experience when I've felt I have no answers and let go and let god, the result has been some sort of new enlightenment, progress in my recovery. Sometimes I just need to stop feverishly looking for an answer and fearlessly wait, trust that my life is unfolding, I'm progressing gently in the hands of my loving hp. Everything will be ok. Everything is ok. I am safe. I am loved. I am where I am meant to be. I try to have faith and hold onto this feeling. Some days are easier than others. But when I'm attentive to the spiritual part of my program, I feel more available, greater acceptance of myself and others as we are, an abundance of gratitude and it seems a bit easier to maintain my serenity. Grateful to everyone here as we continue sharing recovery here in the new year. ((hugs))) TT

__________________

Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.



Senior Member

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Posts: 246
Date:

Thank you Lyne for your service, sharing about your pain and actions you take to walk through the rough patch. I gain power in your example. I can totally relate to being stuck which leads me to inaction then sick thinking sneaks in (for me). TT, you expressed my feelings so well regarding the loss of F2F meetings. My sponsor found creative solutions to stay connected and occasionally meet in person. Personally, I'm zoomed out and unfortunately when we get a rotation of visitors to our home group, I clam up and go into listening/observation mode. We just got word that effective Wednesday, there will be a 21 day lockdown which means the Y will be closed. I had a routine of walking to/from, excersing, engaging with staff /other members which covered self-care, socializing, meditating, time apart from my spouse . Anyways, I didn't freak out. Counted my blessings and decided I am going to pretend I'm a tourist in my city and walk to attractions every day since I live in the downtown core. Also, I will have time to work on the only goal I set : an in depth fear inventory. Fun wow :) Have a wonderful day.

__________________


~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 11512
Date:

Happy Monday MIP. Thank you Lyne for your service and the daily. I 'cycle' less these days than in the past and I can only attribute it to make a daily decision to align with this program, the tools and my HP. I am one who would lean heavy into recovery - all things, and then when I felt more balanced or better would set aside some tools or efforts only to cycle back to negative thinking, projection, insanity, etc.

I am a smart person yet very willful and unintentionally egotistical it seems. I can't explain why I would stop doing anything that brings relief yet, I did that over and over again. I believe (hindsight) at the time I really thought 'the next right thing' I opted for seemed more important until I crashed/burned. Countless times now I have returned to Step One, to remind myself of what truly works for my own recovery.

I finally make a personal commitment to myself as part of my self-care to do several specific things daily no matter what is going on around me. They are basic and they were shared with me early on and by the grace of the God of my understanding, I've been consistent for a few 24 hours. What I now know is that when I truly practice self-care and nurture my spiritual program and my recovery, I am better tooled for 'life events'.

I too am missing F2F meetings and the fellowship presented there. In spite of the isolation caused by this pandemic, I find comfort in believing I am doing my part by being mindful of the virus and how easily it can spread. I've been doing the exact same things the exact same way since the start and don't intend to do differently until I feel safe enough to make changes.

Love and light to all - make it great day!

__________________

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 

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