Today's reading focuses on Alanon's Step 2 - Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

The Alanon member in this reading goes for a walk with their sponsor before an Alanon meeting to discuss their understanding of this step. They tell their sponsor that they know there is a power greater than themself and the difference between sanity and insanity. They are not sure how to go from an abstract belief in a higher power to actions in their daily life that affirm their belief in a higher power. The member had not been able to trust anyone or anything in childhood aside from "ideas."

The reading goes on to describe a profound spiritual awakening connected with nature and the great outdoors the member experienced in the moment while walking with their sponsor. "The feeling that filled me that night was like the sun shining into my very being, bringing with it a burst of consciousness and clarity. The answer to my dilemma arose from somewhere deep inside me. It was trust. Trusting then acting on that trust, was how I could turn my belief into something tangible." From then on, the Alanon member felt their hp had transitioned from an "idea" to "a great trust" within them that will provide the daily guidance, comfort, support needed to act faithfully on their beliefs.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Step Two invites me to develop my trust.

"I don't need to understand the power greater than myself, only to trust it."

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The first thing that came to my mind when completing this reading was "I came, I came to, I came to believe."  Developing trust in a power greater than myself was a process. It included making meetings part of my life, getting an Alanon sponsor who would walk with me, listen to me and share with me as was demonstrated in this reading. Initially, the power greater than myself was the experience, strength and hope of others  in the fellowship. I could hear the honest surrender of their their will and lives to a power greater than themselves as they openly shared at meetings and here at MIP. This gave me hope that someday I might feel that kind of trust too.

I am someone who has had spiritual awakenings much like what was described in this reading and one that was so absolutely undeniable that it truly flipped my denial to trust. I knew I was ready to work with my higher power and be guided to next right actions.  I'm grateful for that transition from fear based control to trust in myself to take hp guided actions. Alanon is a program for life and I consider myself to be a lifelong learner. I no longer fear making decisions because I trust I'm being taken care of by my higher power. If I don't make a good choice it's ok. I learn something. Often, I learn a lot and the lesson is helpful for future decision making. "Courage is fear that has said it's prayers," comes to mind. Trust allows me to keep finding courage to take actions rather than do nothing for fear of fallout. My higher power is the ultimate sponsor who lets me know with a nudge when I am ready to experience something new, when the timing feels right to make a decision, when a particular decision feels trustworthy. With some things I have no doubt of trust in myself and my hp's guidance. Other things can involve a One Day at a Time and Easy Does It process of prayer based on "When in Doubt Don't." Gratefully, Alanon is gentle program of self acceptance. There is no pressure to progress in my recovery on any given timeline. I progress in my higher power's time according to my hp's will for me. But today I trust that it's for "good." I trust that I can try again if I feel I've made a poor choice, that my hp is there to pick me up when I pray for help and is always there with me even when my hp is not uppermost in my mind. When I become more skilled with one lesson, my hp lovingly sends another continuing to guide my life and their will for me.  And lastly, I've known and continue to known happy, joyous and free life moments since teaming up with my higher power and letting them lead. TT