The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Just enough, says today's author; we learn that alcoholism:
* Is devastating to health, spirituality, and happiness
· * Has no cure, but can be arrested when the alcoholic is ready
· * Is associated with, but is not the cause of, our own irrational behavior and decline.
* And finally, that willingness and honesty are required to regain sanity and find serenity, and alanon reading, sharing, and fellowship serve as guideposts along the way.
Reminder - Approaching the Alanon way of life involves willingness and humility, can yield limitless benefits and contentment.
"I ask God to make me willing to learn how to live more fully, through the light which I can find in Alanon." ----------------- In many areas of my life I am driven to find the root cause, usually with the intent of identifying the key mover that I could leverage to bring about change.
My early surprise at Alanon's lack of focus on the causal factors of alcoholism soon gave way to relief as I understood why: the above knowledge was enough, my drive for more seemed to stem from my sense of and desire for control of something outside myself...my energy and efforts need to be focused on my perceptions, thoughts and actions as I deepened my reliance on a higher power rather than my own.
I am free to bypass the Alanon guideposts, but when I do I am committing to a longer journey to my destination of peace and serenity. My quality of life is about my choices...grateful for the wisdom of Alanon
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Good morning, Paul, and thank you sharing this reading. Learning the facts about alcoholism has been a major turning point in my recovery. I did eventually read about what scientists have learned about the disease -- and I think it's significant that I didn't do this until after my alcoholic loved one had passed away. This was my higher power protecting me from attempting to use the information to control.
I don't discuss these details in Al-Anon meetings, as it is an outside issue. But I found that learning about the causal factors of alcoholism, and how it progresses, allowed me to find forgiveness -- both for myself and for the alcoholic. It brought me humility -- the ability to be teachable -- and not to keep going on assumptions that were not based in reality.
This is a huge topic for me -- and I thank you again for bringing it to us.
Thanks Paul for your service and for the great ESH above. I could write pages about what I have learned in alanon. Although this may be a self-centered comment, alanon has taught me how to have a better, more productive, and contented way to live. I did arrive for the alcoholic, but the focus changed. That is one of this programs greatest gifts to me. I had spent many years trying to control my As multiple addictions. These days Im just trying to control myself. Its enough of a challenge, but brings me many rewards. Grateful member.
I especially identify with Freetime's share today. Education, like with all things, brings deeper understandings of subjects, so that we humans can make our own decisions and not be blindly lead. Knowledge received may be too much to handle at first and unable to be processed. The program of Al-Anon knows this, and allows for members to come to their understandings on the time-table that is right for them. Grateful.
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thanks Paul for your service and my MIP Family for bringing theirs also. The need for and practice of humility as my sponsor said was being "teachable" is primary to my life recovering from alcoholism and other life addictions. The lessons we learn and the work we put into the life we live has taught me deeply and earned a relationship with a power greater than myself that I did not know existed until I witnessed so many other members of this family practice. I came to understand thru that witnessing that I was soooo different because of practicing what I didn't know constantly. Denial? if denial was a conscious behavior it wasn't denial. Denial for me was "not knowing and not knowing I wasn't knowing" I wasn't even using the effort to know I didn't have to If I was supposed to I would be struck by some mysterious force sometime when I would not be out of the way and so that didn't happen and I got sicker than I would ever imagine a person would. My former sponsor and early Al-Anon group called this "Not knowing and not knowing that I wasn't knowing" I even heard this description while attending college to find out what I did not know about alcohol and alcohol addiction and more.
In Al-Anon I learned to go to college and to keep going as it was just 3 blocks from my house. When I finished my studies and was standing on the entry steps of the college a voice in my mind said "You could have learned all of this in the meetings" yet I hadn't until college and I stopped thinking that I was a "dumb as a stick". I knew my wife would be safer because one of the things I learned was that she was sick and not a bad person. I stopped calling her and thinking of her as a bitch. She saw, felt and understood the changes also and knew I would not "beat" her again ever.
Al-Anon saved us both; me sooner and then her also...thank you God.
Alcoholism is a disease of the mind, body, spirit and emotions; can never be cured; only arrested by total abstinence. This and more I learn in the rooms from those who have come before me and spent the time to give it away to me...(((((HP)))))
