The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading reminds us of the work we have done in cleaning up our past-cleaning house. In Step Ten (an essential Al-Anon promise), then, we must review each day to ensure that we do not accumulate a backlog of guilt to worry about.
Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
We must continue to live one day at a time and deal with each days successes and failures as they come. In doing so, we acknowledge our imperfections and our progress. In searching out the corners of our minds, motivations, and actions, we keep the focus on ourselves.
Look to yourself it there that all your answers are found.
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Can I be honest and say first that any mention of housework sends me into CRAZY?! Whenever the subject comes up in conversation, I always remark that I am the worlds worst housekeeper. When I know someone is coming to visit, I go into a cleaning frenzy, imagining that in every nook and cranny of my house, my guest might see dust or grime and be totally disgusted with me.
I know I am not actually the worlds worst anything. I am slowly coming to understand that being imperfect is the human condition and l am okay to be imperfect. The trouble comes when I allow pain into my life by beating myself up over those faults.
Paths to Recovery reminds me that both our humanness and our spirituality expand when we accept and forgive the mistakes of ourselves and others.
When I honestly review my day, I activate the serenity prayer: accepting what I cannot change, accessing courage to change my thinking, and seeing the wisdom to decide whether a problem is something I can fix or something I need to forgive (promptly!).
In reflecting on each day, not only am I living through one day at a time, but I am doubling down and making each day count, ensuring I see my Higher Powers blessing and trusting that contemplation, correction, and forgiveness will lead to joy.
Thank you, everyone, for letting me share!
-- Edited by Bbrave on Wednesday 23rd of June 2021 10:35:56 PM
-- Edited by Bbrave on Wednesday 23rd of June 2021 10:39:42 PM
Thanks bBrave for your service and for all the great ESH. I try to examine myself throughout the day as another member wrote about. I keep tabs on what I could improve upon, and also, what I have done that enhanced my self-esteem. If/when I realize I have hurt someone, I think it through and then apologize or make amends ASAP. I carried a lot of junk around for many years--I like a clean house!
I must say, although I appreciate a very clean house, my philosophy is that I always have things that are 100% better to do than clean house! LOL! Therefore, my house is "picked up" at all times... it isn't a "clean house." I am comfortable with that.
I find as I move my way through my Al-Anon healing, that addressing Step 10 keeps me squarely in my own hula hoop! It is better for me if I do not allow negative energies to linger with me. The "packing away for later" of feelings is a tough habit to break... so actively engaging in Step 10 helps with that!
Hope you all have a great Thursday... b/c it's almost Friday!!!!!!!
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__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Than you Bbrave, and all who have shared on this great topic -- keeping the "house" clean. How do I continue to take personal inventory? I have a couple of thoughts on that.
As I progressed in my recovery through the steps, and as I began to have a more forgiving attitude toward myself, I came up with the idea that I wanted to re-write step 10. I would joke in my meetings that I was taking up a petition to have the wording changed to "when I was wrong -- AND when I was RIGHT -- promptly admitted it." Because I realized that although I am not perfect, sometimes I am pretty good. In all honesty, I do not think that step will be changed, but thankfully the moral inventory in Step 4 has me look at both my assets and my liabilities. And it has me look at the assets first.
As I am working Step 4 now, and worked on a question about kindness. I had to write about how I am kind, and I wrote a lot about kindness to others. Now my sponsor has challenged me to write about how I am kind to myself. What??? Not an easy question. But I am working on that answer. I can see it is part of taking a personal inventory. How much self-kindness do I have in my personal warehouse?
Hi Bbrave...Love your name and thanks for the great post
step 10---my one of my best friends as it keeps me current on any amends I need to make, and also it is a good progress report...How did I do today?? How do I feel?? How was I a blessing to the universe?? How did I mess up?? ALL of it...positive and negative and go from there...Keeping "current" keeps me in tune with how I am progressing and what do I really need to work harder on.....
One.of.ky friends who was in AA told me quite firmly that I have to look at strengths. We cannot overdo going on about our faults v vwe are indeed imperfect beings .
Building on my strengths is so key
Right now Inam building my health. I am looking at food as fro rather than ad as a comfort of a solace .
Taking care of myself is quite foreign to me
I don't really compare step 1p to housekeeping
Hiwever I am most certainly.keepimg up on my to do list
This week I accomplished one of those by taking care of my dog. Now the priority is to get ready for a doctor's visit
I.have made my home a place of great solace for me. It is indeed very very comfortable. I seek to reinforce that on a daily basis
When I lived with an alcoholic the house was treasure kfvchais. The only place I got yo refuel was uber the garden. I worked very hard on that garden. I was so proud of my results
Getting a chance to refuel is so key if we are around alcoholics. Thetr is often si much chaos involved in that style of life.
At one time I thought I.was comfortabke with chaos. Now Inam not
Where I work there is a great deal of chaos. They go from one crisis to the next. Eventually that gets really kinda old
Unfortinately a lot of work places seem to have that as the case lie. So I have to first of all work on ways not into that
Self preservation was not in my.vocabulary in the last
Now it is
Thank you very much for being of service to this group
Lovely share Bbrave... 
...
Therefore, my house is "picked up" at all times... it isn't a "clean house." I am comfortable with that. 
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