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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Courage to Change June 23
Post Info TOPIC: Courage to Change June 23
Skorpi


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Courage to Change June 23
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Hello MIP! 

In today's reading, the author shares about the courage to be honest with ourselves. Being honest with ourselves can be quite the challenge! It can be difficult to admit that someone we care about has an addiction, that the addiction is beyond our own control, and that a power greater than ourselves can help. Cultivating the quality of being honest with ourselves is one thing we can do to aid our spiritual growth. 

Honestly allows us to really look at ourselves, share what we discover with others, and free ourselves through the process of making amends for past wrongs. Honesty with ourselves allows us to truthfully review our attitudes and actions each day, to reach out to others as equals, and continue to grow in all aspects of our lives. 

The author concludes by suggesting that we find the courage for such honesty in our continuously-developing relationship with a Power greater than ourselves. 

Today's Reminder: I know that honesty is an essential part of the 12 Steps. I am willing to be more honest with myself today. 

Today's Quote: "Where is there dignity unless there is honesty?" Marcus Tullius Cicero

-----------------------------------------

I'm so thankful to the program and the 12 steps for helping me to be honest with myself. When I first started the program, I felt powerless, I felt that I was at the mercy of my wife's addiction, and I didn't like the decisions I had felt that I had been forced to make. I didn't recognize myself, and I'd hurt every relationship I had with anyone else. Being honest with myself about my situation was difficult! I think I avoided it for so long because I knew I wasn't going to like what I saw. But slowly, I started to be honest with myself with the help of the program. I was honest about my wife's addiction and mental health issues. This lead me to be honest with myself about my expectations and my choices. It took time, and a lot of courage, but slowly, this honesty allowed my to make positive changes in my life, make amends, and move forward in a good way. 

I hope you make today a great day! 



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Skorpi

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
Debb


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Thank you Skorpi for your service, today's reading and ESH.

I agree, Al-Anon 12 Steps helped me to be able to honestly see my powerlessness over alcoholism and to put my fears, anxieties and

anger into the hands of my HP. I do see and realize that without doing those two things, honestly doing the next 10 steps would have

would not have been successful.

The most important aspect to Al-Anon is to realize that the disease is in control of the alcoholic and fighting the words and actions of

the disease does not make any sense. Fighting the words/actions of the disease only holds you back from successfully approaching

the 12 Steps of Al-Anon.

Thank you HP, MIP and Al-Anon, very grateful!!



-- Edited by Debb on Wednesday 23rd of June 2021 07:24:21 AM

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"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown

Debbie
Lyne


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Thanks Skorpi for your service and for ESH above. Honesty is something Ive come to really value as a member of the human race. And interestingly enough, as Ive grown in program and become a more honest person, its given me better self-esteem. I respect this quality in myself. Program has given me positive aspects that Ii could not have imagined. Grateful member always.

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Lyne
JerryF


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What can I more honestly say other than I am so happy and settled for coming here this morning and sharing in you 3 ladies recovery.  Thanks for your support and the smile now on my face...oooops gotta go shave.  ((((hugs)))) wink



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Jerry F
DavidG


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aww Thanks Skorpi... smile ...

                             I was brutally honest with myself- and this spilled over too. As a kid I believed that the parents and adults were drinking poison. And after the fourth drink- I am still certain they were! I had to learn to curb my tongue. That is why I believe that our emotions, and our day to day opinions are so important.

As I woke this morning I went from Step 11 to Step 10. I reflected on- denial- minimisation- acceptance. Even at Step 12 we could embrace the truth. To let go and relax. To feel safe in our own skin.

I really relish the opportunity to spend time with other family members. Daily and weekly reality checks are healing. Peeling away the layers of mistrust and confusion.

The words ~family~ and ~home~ spring to mind. 

Phew! Made it here, Made it safe. Somewhere to relax. biggrin

                 smile  T   h   a   n   k   s   .  .  . smile...



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Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  
SunnyFrogs


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Thanks for all your good,helpful shares.

I am short on words today but just wanted you all to know how much I appreciate you. I learn so much from your ESH

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mamalioness


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thank you Skorpi

great shares everyone!!! I got mad at one of my friends and I snapped at her and was angry about our disagreement...I have been under lots of stress of late and I did not do the ---stop and think---slogan which could have prevented my outburst

It did not take me long to see that I was right about my point, but my delivery of it absolutely STUNK....so I got honest with me AND her in my amends and told her that I haven't been myself of late, I'm sorry..Lesson???  stop and think b4 I open my big mouth...





-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 24th of June 2021 08:22:21 PM



-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 24th of June 2021 08:30:59 PM

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Rose, a work in progress!!!

KEEP IT SIMPLE_EASY DOES IT_KEEP THE FOCUS ON ME
Maresie888


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Honesty is a hard one for me. I am currently dealing with an obnoxious supervisor. She is truly obnoxious with tremendous favoritism issues 

Luckily I do not have to.deal with her as much 

Nevertheless it is a big strain because people like that are sticky. Whenever you deal with them afterwards you feel like you have been slimed 

In the past I would complain about it. Now I take action 

 Now I am very very observant about boundaries. Very observant 

If someone I know is obnoxious if I can help it I am not going to give them the time of day I am done with the lashing out variety.  That is not adult behavior.  Many alcoholics shirk drombehaving like an adult 

Of course I have had my share of dealing with people who lasted out at me.  I never really knew how to respond. Now I do. They can keep their amends. I do not deserve to be spoken to in that way 

So currently I go out of my way not to deal with the supervisor 

I have to deal with her as a professional 

I do not have to deal with her as a person. Whatever problems she has are hers.  I have had to learn to be non committal about it. 

 

I know for sure when I am dealing with the alcoholic the apologies are plentiful and they result in no change in actions .

Therefore in this instance around people who take no responsibility for their behavior it means nothing .  Some people refer to it as the #sorry alcoholic# 

My boundries have to be adjusted accordingly. 

That is my new way of being 

I may well have to deal with certain obnoxious people who are rude, vicious and deliberately hurtful. I do not have to extend them compassion. As an adult I am responsible for my behavior. 

I regret having to deal with alcoholics in the past. Today as an adult I have to set tremendous limits on how I interact with those who lash out. I only have so much energy 

I respect my energy levels these days. I no longer permit myself to be sucked dry by those persons who have no intention of behaving as an adult. I could not set those limurs before. Now I can.  And I most certainly do. 

 

Maresie 

 

 



-- Edited by Maresie888 on Friday 25th of June 2021 08:24:46 PM

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