Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - Al-Anon Family Group

seachange · Senior Member

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

wallsal55 · Senior Member

Oh yes, PTSD ! I have had this! I have flashbacks....Something can trigger my mind as a reminder of something from the past....drinking behavior, a sight, sound, thought that takes my mind right back in time....to that very moment of trouble, fear, terror, pain, etc.

Yes, I have had to have medications....as my brain chemistry has gotten totally messed up from the stress of drinking. I first had a Thyroid Imbalance, with severe PMS. Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder plus Seasonal Depression. They see a LOT of PMS in alcoholic relationships. It is now considered Bipolar I. I hate to have that label because I think of all A stress and the ovaries sending the wrong signals to the pituitary gland as the cause. However, no matter how hard I "try", I cannot correct my brain chemistry. Thus I need meds.

That is why when I post, I remind everyone to protect themselves from the disease of alcoholism, it not only can destroy the alcoholic, but us too! It can kill them, and US ! And if we do not die from it, we are, uh, messed up for life sometimes!

In my case, all my husband has had to do is quit drinking....and I am damaged worse than he is. (I say this because he had 10 yrs. of sobriety, picked up again, drank 6 more years, now sober for some time now. It's just the drinking has been harder on me and taken its toll) Has it taken a toll on him? Nope. He comes out smelling like a rose. So far, he's been a very luck man. I guess he pays for my medical bills, and supports me. He has to know deep inside his disease is responsible for my mental problems. So, that's his price tag.

Anyway, I found a good psych. doc to treat the SAD and PMS. They are helping me with Talk Therapy to correct my negative thinking and my reactive thinking. (I still react to my alcoholic and certain triggers.)

Alanon helps with reacting, but for me I have had to take it one step beyond Alanon. I still react and need to replace reactions with better self-talk (responding). My social worker helps with my thinking and attitude patterns because they are so automatic !

I hope this helps, and I tell my story, in hopes that others can be spared my trials. I still to this day, try to get bits and parts of my life back. (Recovery means getting something back one day at a time! )

wallsal55 · Senior Member

Interesting Site

seachange · Senior Member

RE: Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

isabela40 · Senior Member

I too have been diagnosed with PTSD, it was 20 years ago for me.

I have never taken medication, but over time the symptoms do get better.

Since I am now married to ANOTHER alcoholic it causes me to have a more chronic form of PTSD.

Over the years I have learned to manage it. What I have learned is to not make a big deal about it, lots of people have it, it is a difficult society we live in.

The most important ESH I can share with you is to be gentle with yourself. PTSD manifests in different symptoms at different times. I have a lot of the "always on alert" stuff. I have lots and lots of trouble sleeping, as I feel it is hard to let my guard down enough to really sleep well. I have to sleep on the sofa, in my clothes, most of the time, as I feel like I don't want to get too comfortable. On the sofa I am not too comfortable and sleep lightly and am easily awakeded...strange, but that makes me feel more relaxed...the nature of PTSD. Sometimes I feel as though I have to sleep with my shoes on, purse strap in one hand, keys in the other...and I do that...by doing whatever is reasonable to deal with my anxiety, my anxiety is lessened. Sometimes I am able to put on pajamas and sleep in my bed. I do whatever I need to do and am much better because of it.

I am not breaking any moral or legal laws to sleep on the sofa with my clothes on...so why stress about it? I always got evening jobs so that I could sleep during the day. Sleeping during the day works great for me...people are up and about...not much bad happening...so i am more relaxed. I mostly sleep while my daughter is in school, and am up by the time she gets home from school.

I also have issues as far as personal safety, so once again I work around that. I go to most places with my husband, mom, or daughter...although in a pinch I am able to drive somewhere alone...but it causes anxiety, but enough so that I can't manage it.

I used to have severe anxiety attacks, but they have lessened over the years, now I only get them at night and they are more manageable.

Lots of people learn to deal with and life with their PTSD, and I take comfort in that.

Just be gentle with yourself and don't make too big of a deal over the PTSD. Try to avoid medication if you can. My sister also has it and did the medication route and her body became dependent on the meds and she still suffers from extreme anxiety attacks while mine have greatly improved...as my body learned to lessen anxiety responses on its own.

Work with your doctor to decide on meds...if he feels you have a choice and have a good plan on dealing with it without meds...then go with that. But, if your life is so disrupted that your doctor says you need meds...listen to him...

People DO get well from PTSD and don't have it anymore...but it is difficult to do while living with an active addict. I got it from extreme physical abuse from my first husband...who was addicted. My husband now is not physically abusive, but emotionally, so it still triggers my symtoms.

I am not so sure that alcholics emerge scott free from their addictions. All of that abuse takes a toll on them, their livers, organs, brain, and may not come out until later in life. Addictive drugs fool with your brain chemistry and the longer you use them the worse you are for it. Men just in general don't suffer from as many phsychiatric ailments as women do, simply because they don't have the hormone fluctuations that women do. I know lots of women with bi-polar, PMS problems, etc. who need treatment and are not in abusive relationships and dont' have PTSD. One woman I know was raised in a loving home, old family friends, married her first boyfriend who is also a minister. They are very happy together and she had three children. She suffers from depression, such severe PMS that she needs to be medicated, and also bi-polar. She has never been abused or mistreated.

So, it is also not good to blame our alcoholics for all of our problems, like they try to do to us. Yes, stress is a factor in all illnesses, but stress is part of life, if it is not one thing, it is often another. Pregnancy and child birth wreck havoc with woman's hormones many times and put them out of whack enough so that they never are normal again. So, not all problems are caused by stress and living with an addict.

Try not to stress so much, PTSD is very common and many people live full and satisfying lives with it.

Isabela

rosie light shines · ~*Service Worker*~

sea, i got diagnosed with ptsd...and i got books and i have learned ways to "manage my symptoms"....

one book, "i can't get over it" really opened my eyes, and also on amazon.com i got a ptsd workbook by a "julie" someting i would have to find the book and get it

u can write me in pvt, jax1957@yahoo.com if u want

but yeah, there ARE ways to "talk me down" when i am beginning a panic attack....the key is "get it when it first starts, B4 it really takes off"......deep breathing...self talk..... muscle tightening and releasing.....there ARE things....vit b-complex.....cleansing foods...excercise...

its a complex list and i am a lousey typist.....if u want u can write me in pvt, its just too long to put in a post.....

i have finally through the program, and these books, felt like i CAN have SOME peaceful days.......but i got to take care of me EACH day and ACCEPT me as i am, and TRY to learn how to stay in my body/ grounded/ in the moment...i mean its comprehensive, stuff i have to practice and the emotions of anger that come up when i think of what that freak did to me, causing me a lifetime of this, but i go on....i do all i can to make the best of it......

it is liveable but its work, and dedication to self and boundaries, and nurturing self, sorry to ramble but i am getting tired and i am off to bed...............ttyl, rosie

d53sjurne · Senior Member

Hello there,

Yes I to have PTSD along with other after-affects and am on disability as its not that easy to control in the society we live in in my opinion. Seems a lot of people now adays think they can treat people how ever they want and its up to us to protect or manager our feelings in regards to their way of expression even if its hurtful. A good one is , i'm supposed to remove myself if I dont like it instead of them leaving or adjusting themselves when they are around others. It sometimes seems its an abusers world anymore. And oh yea, hide the vulnerability so they can keep on keepin on. When I was dealing with some rape stuff . They were teaching to hide from all potential dangers. Don't enjoy walking were you are vulnerable, they seem to have more rights to freedom than the ones trying to live right.

I am very tone and energy sensitive. Having to have 1 eye open 24/7 growing up caused me to develope an extremely high sense of movement around me. Even the wind a body puts off as it passes by. One way I understood it was , if you can imagine being blind and deaf, as ACA's have to be but not litterally, and the same way the ones that are litterally learn to sense their world that way. In a way its a skill but learned in an inapproapriate environment. All senses are heightened. So after being away from it, the abuse, it becomes a detrement and a big boundary problem. It served its purpose as a survival skill like those in uncivilized territory, I am ashamed to say, but true. Its not so easy to unlearn or desensitise being pushed to the limits of using major portions of the brain that awaken, that for some have to go learn yoga to get when they are older. But a child to have to learn at such a young age to survive in a family thats supposed to protect them is hard for some and not easy for a child to understand what has happened to them much less other adults that are in denial or alot of other unaware positions.

Its a very complex issue to have PTSD. I see it as a perception issue. Having to much that doesnt work in the supposed healthy environment some want to control us to be in for social control and so called normality and boundaries of society to function on or in.

Well better end here. Take what you like and leave the rest .

Blessings>>>>>>>>>for..............>>>>>>>>Recovery<<<<<<<

-- Edited by d53sjurne at 06:06, 2006-04-29

maresie · ~*Service Worker*~

I have ptsd and can definitely relate. I seem to go through cycles with symptoms getting worse at different times. For me there is a definite reliving at certain times of the year, right now it is around the Christmas period mainly. I alternate between numbing and flooding. Like you I was never prescribed any medicaiton and lately I have begun believing that some anti depressants and tranqulizers would have helped definitely at different times. I wish I had pursued that. Right now I take a herbal remedy for depression. I spent a lot of time processing various memories and found that helpful in separating stuff out. There was no question that I had definite over reactions to triggers and I had to learn to be not as "primed" to trigger as before. So for me that was principally about stress management.

For me there is a intricate correlation with my ptsd which was from my past my childhood and the issues of living with an alcoholic. My ptsd shuts me down and makes me numb so therefore when I meet an alcoholic I am not necessarily aware that there are issues there. I would like to work/live/play in an environment that is not triggering. I am not sure if that is possible but I am working towards it.

Maresie.

nmike · ~*Service Worker*~

Seachange,

This is what I like about MIP. The honest posts help so much. I learn alot. The responses made me think about my own history although I have never been diagnosed with PTSD. I have always had trouble sleeping soundly. There is also mental illness in my family. My AH who is sober was told he has PTSD when we went to counseling. The therapist said she couldn't help us as a couple. He needed to address PTSD from growing up in an alcoholic family and I needed to address being codependent/role of the victim. One of the replies here said that they shut down and become numb. That describes my AH precisely. I wish I was more compassionate towards him.

In support.

Nancy

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