Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> A program like the Al Anon program, but specifically for people that have a loved one with MENTAL HEALTH issues??
Post Info TOPIC: A program like the Al Anon program, but specifically for people that have a loved one with MENTAL HEALTH issues??
texas yankee


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 222
Date:
A program like the Al Anon program, but specifically for people that have a loved one with MENTAL HEALTH issues??
Permalink  

Hi - I am a great believer in Al Anon's approach, and I have been active in the program for many years - I have acquired a lot of ESH over the years from face-to-face meetings, and also from you fine folks here.  My adult son has very recently exhibited some sudden onset mental health issues, and while there is a lot of common ground and overlap between mental health issues and alcohol\substance issues, there are some significant differences, from what I've seen during my brief journey into that environment, and what I'm experiencing now trying to cope with this situation.  SO, I'm looking for support groups for folks like me who have a loved one that's experiencing mental health issues - support group(s) specifically focused on mental health issues with a similar approach to Al Anon's methodology.   

I've looked into some of the NAMI programs, and while I think that those folks are caring and informed and trying to help, for me, NAMI has been hit or miss and those programs aren't nearly as effective as Al Anon meetings, phone lists, etc.  I've looked at Families Anonymous (seems to be focused on addictions) but I don't think that's what I'm looking for

Any suggestions?  Thanks in advance!



-- Edited by texas yankee on Saturday 19th of June 2021 11:31:23 AM

__________________
PosiesandPuppies


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2795
Date:
Permalink  

I wasn't going to comment, b/c I thought surely you have done this, but perhaps research "Dual-Diagnosis Support Groups?"

Anyway, I do want to send strength your way. (((((Texas yankee))))

__________________

"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  Mary Oliver

 

 
Daffodils


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 443
Date:
Permalink  

Good Day. Here in Ontario, Canada we have CAMH (Centre for Addiction and Mental Health) which offers programs for families. The term used here is Concurrent Disorders. I am assuming you're in the U.S., however, the website contains useful information that may lead to some ideas to assist in your search. All the best...sending prayers for you and your son.

__________________
DavidG


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2940
Date:
Permalink  

 

 Hi Joe... ...on the USA there are 12 Step groups for just about everything!

When I was young- and when I was in the city I went to a counsellor about my dad. It was really brief and i was not offered any ongoing support.

The counsellor told me that my dad had an underlying condition- that made him drink.

The mental health world is a crazy hazy world- as far as i can see. There are often no solutions. A lot of the experts on C-PTSD are very old now.

Most, if not all have come to grips with their own issues along the way, eventuating back to the 1940's.

Alanon is not a club- open every newcomer. Not at all. At this end of the rope- this neck of the woods, in NZ our groups are tiny. And our groups need

members, in order to work as groups. And we do stretch the rules, in order to retain members.

I always say today that the only qualifier I need to bring to a meeting is myself.

I have been on a journey of recovery- to recover myself. To find my own soul and my own destiny.

Personally, I tell newcomers to come to 6 or 8 meetings to see if they belong, and if they qualify.

Or to see if they are ready and able to take on the task of personal change.

For some the task could be destructive, and damaging. It has to be a full and fair choice.

Parts of the journey we need to undertake alone. We always need our own motivation to follow through.

 

As an older member I am dedicated to promoting healthy meetings.

And ways of meeting needs. Of my own needs are not being met at a meeting I apply the Traditions.

This has always worked for me.

There are lots of trips and traps along the way- because people do not understand what a healthy life is about, let along a healthy meeting.

 

It takes months and years to create a healthy meeting and group. Patience.



__________________

Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  
JerryF


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1334
Date:
Permalink  

 

Aloha Joe I followed my elder sponsor's, now deceased suggestions regarding patience, listen, learn and practice, practice, practice to arrive at the balance I now have.  It also included college progress into being a behavioral health therapist myself to get as close as I have today.  I have seen recovery in many of my patients for both mental and behavioral health while never going in for perfection.  "It works when they have worked it".  Congradulate him for the milestones he has made.  wink

 



__________________
Jerry F
texas yankee


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 222
Date:
Permalink  

Thanks, all, for the ESH. I'm usually good with internet search stuff, but at this point with my own mental process being so erratic, I hadn't searched for "Dual-Diagnosis Support Groups" - which makes perfect sense - I was able to find some groups to suggest to my son, if he's interested in and accepting of any group work, while I remind myself constantly that this situation with him is NOT something that I can control. Thanks!

__________________
Enigmatic


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 963
Date:
Permalink  

Howdy Texas,

Just a thought, our Step 12 suggests that, after our spiritual awakening, we 'practice these things in all our affairs'. Tradition 12 adds that we can place 'principles above personalities'.

The principles of this program help us in any circumstance, with anyone or anything we are having difficulties dealing with.

The 12 Steps, Traditions and Concepts work for anyone, anywhere who is willing and wanting spiritual recovery.

What you are looking for is, quite likely, right here

__________________

Paul

"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives."  - Paths to Recovery 
JerryF


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1334
Date:
Permalink  

I love that realization Paul and I cheer the minute I found out and agreed cause I got set free over again..."...help us in any situation?"  Right on.  Gotta keep practicing that.   Thanks.!!  biggrin

 



__________________
Jerry F
Skorpi


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1095
Date:
Permalink  

Hiya!

I participated in the NAMI Family-to-Family program. I found it to be very useful, when I combined it with my Al-Anon program work. I definitely took the "Take what you like and leave the rest" approach to the NAMI program and groups, and I did find some support and useful connections, if only in the ESH at the meetings, and realizing that I wasn't alone or crazy in dealing with the mental health aspects of things.



__________________

Skorpi

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu
texas yankee


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 222
Date:
Permalink  

Thanks all, for the as always spot-on ESH. The more I look into the world of mental health, I'm thinking that once I get past learning the lingo and understanding my son's diagnosis, most if not all of Al Anon's body of knowledge will be applicable to helping me deal with my son's mental health issues. I am still trying to figure out a few things, like why it appears to me at this point that me dealing with my son's mental health issues are perhaps even more daunting than dealing with his alcohol and substance issues - most likely because it's new ground for me - the potential effects on the loved one are likely equally daunting and troublesome for those of us that love one of those folks. LOL, I have plenty to do right now - working on my control issues, and wondering "why" - that's a trip down the rabbit hole, for sure.

__________________
JerryF


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1334
Date:
Permalink  

 

You seem wide awake right now Texas and its okay to stay wide awake and aware and also keep time for yourself; your issues and such.  I believe you came into the posts on PTSD issues which is but one of mine and at times may include present day drug and addiction problems with family.  I have learned to apply detachment skills to that problem and have  applied HP and family responsibilities when and where I found that was fair and honest.  Over the years I have been in program pretty much that has been successful and my family has surprised me,  they can actually do great self care using clinical services and churches and other areas also.  At one time I thought it all depended on me and then  found the program and then found I had been wrong.

I once had a High School degreed counselor who I asked to sit in on everyone of our sessions ask me, "How do you do what you do?".  The "How" was most important and he learned that how I was doing was letting my 21 classmates learn what was messed up and what they could best do to fix the messes was doable.  I mostly held their hand thru the responsibility area.    

This works when we work it.  

The inventory experiences well learned will help the most.  You're growing. good luck.  smile 

One thing I learn with inventorying was that each and every time I stepped in to adjust or fix or teach those (many) I was taking responsibility from they got sicker and sicker and I got less believable and responsible..

 



-- Edited by JerryF on Friday 25th of June 2021 05:45:47 PM

__________________
Jerry F
Maresie888


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1360
Date:
Permalink  

NAMI have a solid organization
They are a pretty good resource for families
They have a different source of funding
They are professionally active

__________________
Maresie888


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1360
Date:
Permalink  

Texas yankee 

 

I believe it is indeed very supportive of you to learn the issues around your son's diagnosis. 

Thete may be resources at the hospital. There are indeed many many resources these days 

I do not know that al anon will be enough in working on how a dual diagnosis would work 

 

There are indeed many many parents and family members out there dealing with dial diagnosis. 

There is no question grief is a factor when someone is diagnosed with a mental disorder. In addition there are many many issues with medication 

I have had friends who had major mental disorders. The side effects of the medication was a very big issue for them 

I would certainly encourage you to look around and get every resource you can 

I would also commend you for being willing to address this 

When I was a child I had a very serious kidney disease which meant I had to take medication.  I was hospitalized on numerous occasions. I most certainly could have done with some support. My family of origin was completely incapable of offering any 

 

Therefore I learned that was the norm. When I was seriously ill the qualifier told me he was bored waiting out in the waiting room. I was admitted to the hospital. He did not call or enquire how I was. That was the pattern I learned from the indifferent response I had as a child

Al anon can indeed be very helpful. However the more resources you have the better your choices will be 

 

 



__________________
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> A program like the Al Anon program, but specifically for people that have a loved one with MENTAL HEALTH issues??