The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This reading is for Monday, 5/24. Oscar Wilde is quoted: In this world there are only two tragedies. One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. The last is much the worst.
The writer says their will gets them into trouble, for even if they get it, they are not satisfied. The 12 Steps dont talk about my will. The writer goes on to say that lasting satisfaction has only come when they can let go of their self-will, and turn to HP. When HPs will comes before their own, their dreams have a chance of becoming a wonderful reality.
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This reading reminded me of XMas morning as a child, and would the material thing my heart most desired be under the tree? And sometimes it was....
As Ive gotten older, what I most desire is health and peace for myself, my loved ones, and for the world. And I certainly do my best to have health and peace, but many things are out of my control. And of course for all others, I am sure I have no control. And so in the end it does come down to having a belief that a power greater than myself will guide me to the place I need to be. And therein lies the power of this program. Betty taught me: I cant, He can, I will let Him.
Lyne: thank you for the share and your service very interesting--tragedies of someone getting what they want were not getting what they want and I think I have this in reverse but to get what they want could be the worst. In my sick days I would say yes I agree with this but now my wants are very simple in that I want to be able to adequately meet my needs and some of my wants financially. I want good health I want good abundance I want love in my life and I want to express myself in a healthy way. But I can see where the writer says that lots of folks are not satisfied no matter how much of their once they get and that is ego stuff in my opinion. This is an interesting post. In my sick days yeah a lot of times Getting what I wanted was not good for me but now as I recover. I have very basic needs and wants and those are what I said above about good health and Good wealth and good love and good self-expression
I never tell HP any specifics like I am facing the loss of my unemployment benefits prematurely and so yes I want to be able to support myself. I need to be able to support myself so what I am doing is giving thanks to the universe for my happy and abundant means of support and thats it--no specifics--I dont tell HP how to answer a legitimate need or want I just give thanks for it and put some emotion into it so my subconscious mind believes that it is coming and then I let go but I do that gratitude every single day. So I have to agree with Oscar Wilde. In my sick days I totally agree with this. But As I get healthier, my wants and needs are more realistic and normal in that I just want to be able to take care of myself
Thank you Lyne for your service and the daily. Thank you all for your shares & ESH. This reading reminds me how much I tried to control other people, places and things before finding a bit of grace and sanity in recovery. What really pops to mind is the expansive and extensive effort I used to put into Christmas - the decorations, the gifting, the cards, the food, etc. Goodness, I would start early and work tirelessly!! As it would happen, no matter how much effort I put in, and the time for finding the perfect gifts, the best cards, etc. I was not at all joyful because I was extremely exhausted. Not to mention that the 'reason for the season' was completely lost on me for some years!!
For me, when I allow my will to be in charge, and spend time focusing on my wants vs. my needs, I feel I am unintentionally blocking myself from the sunlight of the spirit. When instead I just focus on being of service, doing the next right thing and staying in my own lane, I have much, much better days.
I also believe deeply in the power of prayer. While it doesn't solve world hunger, financial issues and/or family/health concerns, it does bring me a sense of peace and calm in knowing there's a power greater than I who does have the master plan and knows what he's doing. I'm grateful that I am a miracle in progress!
Enjoy tomorrow all - I'm supposed to golf - weather permitting! We got rained on today - big time. If I had my way/will, this storm system parked overhead would be gone already!! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Dear Lynne
Thank you so much for your service to this board
Living in acceptance was certainly not my forte .
I most certainly have my sense of right and wrong
For most of my life I was on the #wrong# side. Living with someone who has a substance abuse disorder is indeed one of the most trying onerous experiences one can deal with.
I have my own issues to deal with, chronic health issues, isolation, financial concerns, external stressors. Add all tho deed to the chaos involved in a substance abuse disorder and you find really a tsunami of constant churning abject humiliation and rage.
Certainly when I was with the qualifier my goals were to try to navigate the abject chaos he caused day in day out. Naturally I failed. Any reasonable person would fail.
Sometimes the peace in my life comes from wishing people well with their destructive choices. That is indeed a revelation for me
Personally for me the more I work on the issues related to my childhood the more organized productive and capable I feel. It takes tremendous courage to take responsibility for yourself no matter what.
I am indeed #priviledged# to have found al anon.
However al anon alone does not meet all my needs. Inhave therapy and numerous other support groups related to my childhood issues. I am decades into my recovery from my childhood. At one time people talked about 5 years as a significant milestone for recovery. I am decades into recovery, many years into recovery from dealing with someone else's substance abuse disorder.
Thank you for being committed to recovery it is indeed more than helpful to share the journey
