The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading is about our work in trusting our HPs will. The writer describes having grown up in an alcoholic home and as a result, developed a stubbornness in trusting others, really feeling a me against them mentality. The writer struggled with surrendering to HPs will, and also tended to get lost in relationships. What was helpful fo the writer was considering the 3rd and 11th steps as an alignment with the will of HP. The writer chose to pray about this in a prayer for understanding the will of HP.
The quotation from Paths to Recovery (p.74) is a simple reminder: Our job is to cooperate with God...
I definitely have tried to impose my own will above all else in my life. Typically it results in me going forward, in stubbornness, with a behavior, situation or decision that isnt so great for me after all. Part of this is me being stubborn, and part of it includes not taking the time I should to think something through or to be still with it. Just as the writer had a couple of prayers to help to align with HPs will, I have prayed something similar: please help me to see what I am meant to see or help me be open to Your will. My ego likes to step in, but step 3 is a clear way to work on making the decision to turn our lives and will over to our HP.
Thank you Mary for your service and the daily. Thank you both for your ESH & shares. Practicing brutal honesty in recovery to continue receiving grace and serenity, I have to admit that my first inclination often/always is my will and my wants. It in instinctive, natural for me and my innate go to response to fear. Time and time again, when I am faced with uncertainty, chaos, 'life on life's terms', etc. my first thought is selfish, self-centered and unhealthy.
What has worked well for me is to just Pause and Pray before I Proceed. It is in this short, abbreviated moment I pause where a bit of clarity and healthy options enters for which I choose to believe this is how/when my HP speaks to me and leads me to a better path. What I am finding as I continue my recovery journey is that most of the time, my healthiest option is to detach and not react/respond as it's really no where close to my own hula hoop!!
My habit of wanting to control people, places, things, outcomes, etc. goes well beyond my A(s). My program practices does too. When I remain aligned with my HP as best I can and know to do, my days and my life goes better -- no matter who or what I encounter. Just FYI, Joel's message today is wonderfully aligned with this reading and our shares...
Link if interested: https://www.joelosteen.com/en-US/how-to-watch/Messages/2021/05/15/21/03/Something%20New%20Is%20Coming
I hope everyone has a lovely Sunday. I was supposed to golf this morning, yet we are rained out. I am supposed to volunteer all afternoon until dark - it will be interesting as the rain falling is to continue the entire day. I've been enjoying the smells, sounds and peace of a steady rain, feeling gratitude for another day above ground. Love and light to all - make it a great day!
-- Edited by Iamhere on Sunday 16th of May 2021 09:36:58 AM
-- Edited by Iamhere on Sunday 16th of May 2021 09:38:03 AM
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Good Morning Everyone and thank you for shares that give me exactly what I need right now. I've been struggling with forcing my will and HP sent special forces angels to take care of my concerns. AH has to wear a Holter monitor (I was not surprised) but am grateful he took initiative to keep appointment. He could/would not admit to his physician about the sleep meds he is (ab)using. I asked my Dad for help (14th was anniversary of his death) and thought came to mind to ask pharmacist for printout of side effects. Turns out, they can contribute to serious heart problems. I gingerly handed AH copy, his eyes bugged out upon reading and then proceeded to dump his stash. And then, I dropped the subject (after noting this may not be root cause but may compound his issues). Last night, he was full of fear and couldn't sleep. I said ask God for help. We held hands and prayed and he was out cold within minutes! This morning my HP instructed me to treat him with kindness, love, and support- no preaching and only comment on health concerns when ASKED. Seemed like a tall order until I read the board. Thank you all for being gracious members, sharing your knowledge and keeping me hopeful and helpful (?). I'm slowly learning that to release with love doesn't mean I stop caring. It is a skill I have to practice...daily...and will take time to master... Have a wonderful day. Looking forward to a baseball game this afternoon...
Thank you Mary for your service and share, and of course, to those who have taken the time to type out their ESH. I always seem to have a "takeaway."
Over the course of my marriage, I had become distrustful of others. Heck, for awhile there, I felt as if I couldn't even trust myself!! I am learning to trust my HP. I am learning that me "powering through" something isn't always the best answer. I still have perseverance, I just now try and join that with "Pausing to Assess." Some days are super easy... other days I can struggle. I try and remind myself that my HP has me safely cradled in her hand. She will not lead me astray, but I need to pause and listen to what she gives me!! Woke up to rain showers! It is beautifully wet here, and I am OK with that. My state desperately needs the rain, and I have a "reason" to not attend to all the outdoor stuff that needs done. I am dealing with a very sore neck, and really need some TLC - that I would otherwise push to the side.
Hope you all enjoy your Sunday Funday!
Grateful for you all! :
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-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 16th of May 2021 12:36:44 PM
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 16th of May 2021 12:37:41 PM
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
From the King James Bible:- "My will not thine, so sayeth The Lord."
I my youth and childhood i was not burdened with religion- from within my family- so was open to all possibilities.
I wanted to talk about HP today- without headlining my post. And this seems a good opportunity.
Thanks Mary!
For me, at the moment, my HP is unconditional love. Freely expressed, and acted on. The key for me is to apply the love to myself, as well. Otherwise it becomes overbearing and impossible!
I don't use the oxygen mark in the aircraft metaphor. I always think of my rip-cord on my parachute plummeting through space. Before I try to grab onto another person to help them.
I am learning to trust my HP. I am learning that me "powering through" something isn't always the best answer. I still have perseverance, I just now try and join that with "Pausing to Assess." Some days are super easy... other days I can struggle. I try and remind myself that my HP has me safely cradled in her hand. She will not lead me astray, but I need to pause and listen to what she gives me!! Woke up to rain showers! It is beautifully wet here, and I am OK with that. My state desperately needs the rain, and I have a "reason" to not attend to all the outdoor stuff that needs done. I am dealing with a very sore neck, and really need some TLC - that I would otherwise push to the side. 
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