The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
The reading for Monday, 4/26, asks the question: Whats so wonderful about alanon? It helps us see ourselves as we really are. Are we brave enough to acknowledge our faults? Can we examine with courage and honesty, our good and bad qualities? Alanon helps those who want to break down our broken parts that have kept us from becoming the kind of people we want to be. In part the reminder says that the 12 Steps, the slogans, the Serenity Prayer, and the loving concern of other alanon members, all will help us if we are willing to cooperate.
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Yes, thats exactly right, that if I want to change I need to be a partner with program. I have to listen, and practice, and participate in as many ways that I can to achieve good results. And I do, because I was failing at life for myself, my grown son, and now Im responsible several times a week for my granddaughter. I ached with pain and heartache which is now gone most of the time. Im involved with the board and a F2F now on zoom. I do service for both. I have a new sponsor and try to be on the board daily. I use my alanon tools everyday. I am grateful. I have life skills that no one else has been able to give me, not my family nor therapists. I honestly wish that a twelve step program could be adapted to teach as a high school course. Just imagine how that could change things.....
I am a very grateful member of this program and this forum!
Thank you Lyne for your service, share! May everyone enjoy their new week!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Happy Monday MIP! Thank you Lyne for your service and the daily. Thanks to all for your shares and ESH. I am also a grateful member of Al-Anon as well as MIP. As I reflect, I believe that Al-Anon truly gave me back to me. For as long as I can recall, I haven't truly felt grounded. I was a daughter, sister, cousin, friend, employee, boss, wife, mom, etc. Yet, for some reason, I did not really even know who I was or what I liked/disliked.
Using this program (as designed vs. my way) has helped me see what healthy living looks like. I was a persistently, worried, anxious, hyper-focused, obsessed person before - well meaning, large heart and with the best of intentions. Yet, I truly did not know what joy looked like, what relaxation was and I was always in a hurry - not even sure to where or why...
I know now that I am healthiest when I put myself first, tend to me and take good care of me. I know that I am healthiest when I allow others to be who they are and focus on me and how I respond to life on life's terms, one day at a time. I am my best self when I opt to just walk away from unhealthy situations and people instead of trying to correct, fix, change, control them. I am my best self when I align with my HP each morning, focus on being of service and live my life as it unfolds.
I spend time every morning asking my HP to direct my thoughts, actions, attitude and outlook towards the light. I am more positive than before, and more realistic too. I know now better than to go to the hardware store for bread (most days) and appreciate how a changed attitude aids my recovery.
So, when I first arrived, I turned my back on Al-Anon as I was in denial about my part and how this disease in others affected me. When I truly had enough and felt completely hopeless/helpless, I returned and tried to fully surrender. My ego, self-will and obsession with control battled against the principles of this program for a while and still want to at times. What a gift to just concern myself with progress and not perfection.
I also know that I need daily program efforts for the best chance at staying in my lane. I'm also likely to loose focus when I forget about God's will for me vs. my will for me. I am and will always be a work in progress. I'm grateful for where I am today and who I am today, and willing/excited to keep exploring me/healthy living!
Love and light family - I golfed early this morning and am doing some adulting this afternoon. I'm volunteering tomorrow and Wednesday so food prep and dinners in advance are part of my plan for today. Find your joy and then keep it!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
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