Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: Hope For Today - December 25

~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1161
Hope For Today - December 25

A blessed day to all MIP friends!  Today's page in Hope for Today lists many definitions for Serenity.  I imagine it was compiled from the offerings of many members.

Here are a few of the definitions. Serenity is ....

  • Becoming aware of and accepting my many characteristics and not judging what's 'bad' or 'good' but what's useful to keep and what to release
  • Accepting what is
  • Honoring my feelings without aiming them at someone else
  • Understanding I may be powerless but I'm not helpless
  • Realizing my Higher Power does for me what I cannot do for myself
  • Understanding that reacting to life and responding to life are not the same thing

 The Thought for Today is  the Serenity Prayer, which I hope we all know "by heart."


A gift of the program is knowing that there are many paths to the same destination.  Each person finds serenity in their own way and pace.  I do not have to criticize myself -- or another person  --  if my definition of serenity is different from someone else's.  I can learn from people whose path is different from mine.

For me, serenity is taking one day at a time, not future-tripping, using my God Box as an aid to turning things over to a higher power,  releasing that which I cannot control, releasing others from debts they cannot repay, and believing that I can be OK no matter what happens. Remembering that, yes, sometimes hardship is a pathway to peace.

I wish each and every one of you serenity -- whatever it means to you. 


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1151



Mahalo Freetime and the same back to you.  What a wonderful Christmas gift to wake up early to; a memory and home refresher.  Have a great day for yourself and the same to the entire MIP family.   (((((hugs))))) aww 

Jerry F

~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 1854

Thanks FT for that great reading today! I receive many gifts from alanon; serenity is one of them. Where I live many people are without power this morning. One of the first things I said to myself when I got up is that I am grateful for power. I'm also grateful that I am not sick with covid nor any member of my family. Being able to see assets and gratitude, the ability to make lemonade from lemons, accepting what I cannot change, etc., all help me have serenity. Program has given me tools for living. I'm changed, changing, and still need more recovery. Peace and health to my MIP family. You all help me along my journey. I am grateful for you. THANK YOU!



Senior Member

Status: Online
Posts: 132

Thank you as well FT for today's reading/service and to Jerry and Lyne for all your service and ESH as well!!

Accepting and honoring judgement, silent or verbal from others is one that I am working on, it is difficult for me to live with rejection.

I also realize that what I perceive as rejection is not always what it seems and believe that honoring our differences plays a huge role that I am working on as well.

I tend to be very hard on myself and am a work-in-progress when it comes to working the steps and traditions. Realizing that I am not a perfect being and

therefore neither is anyone else, are what I strive to attain and to help me reach that point of serenity in that area of my life!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all my MIP friends.


"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2495

Thank you Freetime for your service today! I came on here not knowing that there would be a "Daily" today, but pleasantly surprised it is here for the taking! And how did my Akua know that what Freetime posted. - both as the daily and their ESH - was what I needed today? Uncanny. LOL!

My Ex called early this morning from his rehab. I have my phone set so that all "unknown" calls go directly to voicemail. I was able to hear his words without feeling like they would derail me. Still, he has ghosted me and his financial responsibilities since March. I have chosen to understand that this would be the most difficult time to honor those responsibilities, regardless of his addiction "status." During this time, I learned that I am much better off emotionally not hearing from him, although it has been rough depending solely on my income. Well, beyond rough... but my Akua knows what I need, and my parents continue to stay healthy and we are helping each other through this time. Despite all, I am still feeling blessed! Freetime's words touched a chord with me today... I will ponder them often, I believe.

I am grateful for the gifts of Al-Anon. For the gift of Serenity that is there should I choose to accept it. I am grateful this morning for my health, and the health of my family (everyday it seems I learn of someone I know who has contracted the virus). I am thankful for having a job that has not been furloughed (b/c unemployment benefits are not full pay), and it is one that I LOVE! In this stage of my life, and with my present circumstances, it is what gives my life meaning. I am grateful for all the MIP members who share their stories, joy, accomplishments, and yes, even their pain. You are all part of my journey in personal growth, and I thank you!

I would like to wish you all the blessings of your HP, continued good health, and a brighter/healthier/saner 2021!



"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  ~ Mary Oliver



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2562


 aww Thanks Freetime, P., Jerry and Debb...

Just a quiet moment here. Serenity- serene... nice to just focus on the word. smile ...


Each Alanon member is my teacher.                                                                                                                  

~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 10996

Merry Christmas MIP for all who celebrate. Happy Friday to those who do not. For me, serenity is best defined by being comfortable in my own skin. For more years that I can recall, I was not. I had a mind that rarely, if ever slowed down or stopped, a heart that loved hard, deeply and dysfunctionally, and habit of seeking out broken souls to fix and no tools to help me cope with the insanity within. I can not or will not ever blame or attribute it to one source - the disease that brings us together, FOO, past abuse, etc. I became who was was as a result of a lifetime of low self-esteem treated with all the wrong 'medicines' along the way.

I sought attention and love and friendship and more from others incapable of meeting my needs. I put my wants and my will in front of my needs and myself. I allowed fear to overtake my faith - in a HP, in others, in self. I was a time-bomb ticking, reactive shell of a person, ever fearful, defensive, ready to attack and defend much of which was not at all important in the grand scheme of life.

Today, I find myself living a simple life at a slower pace. I prefer peaceful times to chaos, drama, gossip and the hustle of the race. I turn to prayer so often in a day that I can't even count it. I have more faith than fear and know that my past is what it is, the past. It's not necessary to carry it with me everywhere I go; I've been set free and don't need it to prop me up or blame for my present. I avoid, when possible chaotic and dramatic people and prefer those who are healthy. I've allowed faith to replace most of my fear and have a set of tools that get me through anything with a level of grace I never knew possible.

So, serenity for me is just being grateful to be me. It has been a year like no other. I refuse to call it 'bad' or 'horrible' as those are words that trigger negative energy in my mind and heart. It's been hard to watch so many pass away because of the disease and it's been hard to see family and friends mourn the lives ended to soon. I have more disappointment than anger for the way things have unfolded this year and pray continuously for our world, our leaders, our fellow man/woman, etc. Anger doesn't serve me well yet when I am disappointed, I can chose better the next right thing. So, while many are visiting family, traveling, spreading the virus and sickness, I continue to stay at home, with just my AH, cooking for 2, missing my family yet trusting that being part of the solution is the best choice for me.

My parents are suffering greatly....they've lost several friends to Covid and with each loss, it doubles as the remaining spouse often departs their area to return home to be closer to family. My mother can't remember why their activities are gone and thinks my dad is holding her hostage. My dad, saintly as one can be, could use a break/two yet we all know better. I will travel as I did before if I am needed, and they know that. When I was there, it was very strange and very sad to leave and not give/get hugs. Again, this has been a hear like no other.

So, whatever serenity means to you or how you find it - seek it out, claim it your own and fight to keep it. I truly believe that the God of my understanding truly wants me and all others to be happy, joyous and free - which has different meaning to each of us. I send positive energy to all of you, and share gratitude for each of you in my journey.

I reached out to 58 different folks this morning via text. Some were family I normally hang with today, some were friends that are distancing as I am, some were program folks that I know are hurting, some from golf, some from softball - just to be of service and 'do different'. Clearly this holiday is vastly different than normal for me and I had nothing but time. It was lovely to hear back, even though I had no expectations. I opted to take this action to distract me from the sadness of missing my family. It worked - brightened my morning and off to cook I went. We've already had our first meal, plenty of leftovers for grazing. All is cleaned up and I feel good about how the day is going.

My hope is all of us can just rely on this program, our HP and any outside resources and find our way to authenticity, serenity and joy. Love and light MIP family - huge (((hugs))) for all too.


Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 932

For me to have a quuet uneventful day on Chrostmas is indesd a gift 

Christmas is normally a very difficult time for me. 


I am particularly blessed because I have become self reliant. I am not one of those persoms waiting with the fate of my income in someone elsea's hsnds 

My income has of coyrse been affected by the pandemic and I have to tread carefully about waitung the stimulus paymen

I am facimg another normally out of budget expense.  I have to work really hard that challenge. This unexpected expense details certain plans I had for the next few months. 

That is the norm for everyone.


I have had to completely rearrange my life several times this year. I know now I am through being in a place where my future is in someone else's hands. I was completely disempowered and part of that process was deliberate.   That was calculated deliberate and meant to make me feel insignificant 

I have to learn how to respond to that kind of communicationn without being triggered.  I know I am up to that task 

I have some good goals for 2021.  I kniw I am up to the challenge. 












~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2094

Freetime. Thank you so much for those reading. It is so timely. I found this audiobook about surrendering and it goes into hell feelings and thoughts and even things you discover about yourself really dont define the real you. The real me is the untainted on injured spiritual part of me that picked up some negative habits and emotions etc. and feelings and thoughts being in this life. And it talks about how to look at these Parts with a non-judge mental I and just allow the feelings that come up to surface and allow them to pass and the big thing is. For me not to resist them, non-resistance the author really goes into non-resistance and surrendering because negativity cannot do anything with a non-resistant personality and a spirit who is surrendering and it made so much sense. And here you are posting about this and I thought thank you higher power for reminding me LOL

All the little things that you listed, was addressed in this audiobook that I will probably during resting time get back into and re-listen to some of it because it is just so good. Its not 12 steps oriented or anything like that its just a real good self-help book but everything you listed he goes into in the reading

One of my biggest defects or survival traits, I called them is the reaction rather than response. I still react I have still not gotten good at stopping and pausing and breathing and saying a prayer before I respond or react in my case. So I really need to work on that and also the control thing. I see some progress but my goal for this year coming up is to be more in touch with myself and my feelings, paying attention to my body and the whole of me so to speak. And not be so judgemental on myself one I screw up


Rose, a work in progress!!!


Page 1 of 1  sorted by
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.