The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today's author dreamed of winning the lottery, but realized that even winning that much money would not guarantee happiness, would not make the alcoholic sober, would not remove the effect alcoholism had on their family. Money would not remove all of life's problems. Winning a fortune might bring a new set of problems. Acceptance of the things we cannot change is the key. To be able to rely on a higher power to help with any kind of problem is to be a winner.
Today's Reminder: Serenity is always available to me, but it is my job to seek it where it can be found.
Quote from As We Understood: "I now try to take my problems to my Higher Power, but I leave the solutsions and the time table up to Him."
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Certainly having enough money -- whatever "enough" is -- can make my life more pleasant. But I can relate to the feeling that even winning the lottery would not solve all my problems. In my marriage, we always had enough money. But it came to a point that I did not have enough serenity and had no idea what to do about that.
Sometimes my husband would ask me what gift I wanted for Christmas, and I had a really tough time coming up with an answer. We came up with a system that we would take the catalogs that came in the mail, and each of us would circle various things that we would like. Then I would buy one of his choices for him, and he would do the same for me. But as time went on, no catalog had what I really wanted. The only gift that would really make me happy, I thought, was for his behavior to change, for his dysfunctional family members' behavior to change, or -- better still -- for them to move to a galaxy far, far away that did not even have telephone service to Earth. And I couldn't put that on my Christmas list.
I didn't have serenity, and I didn't know where to find it. My wishes have mostly been fulfilled now -- not on my timetable, but in the Higher Power's time. My happiness was not in a catalog, it was in me, and it took the help of Al-Anon for me to be able to find it. I had to do the legwork -- the steps -- and read and listen to a lot of wisdom -- to find out that I had been looking for serenity in the wrong places, but it was there for me if I looked in the right place.
Good morning FreeTime & MIP. Thank you for your service and the daily. I also appreciate your share and ESH. This page always reminds me of the Acceptance section in the 'Big Book' from the 'other side'. Reading that page and embracing the message within has always, always brought me closer to my center and serenity than many other 'things' when I am challenged in my perceptions of other people, places and things...
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation some fact of my life unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in Gods world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on lifes terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.
You all can replace that word 'alcoholism' with whatever you choose to - this is 'it' in it's original form. For me and my program/recovery, it truly says it all. Each day/time that I am unsettled for any reason, it appears that by accident, habit or choice, I've moved away from acceptance. When I move away from accepting life on life's terms, I have given life to my ego and my will again, which disrupts my spiritual connection to my Higher Power.
It happens, I am human. I've been designed by a gracious HP that created me to be perfectly imperfect. He knows my ways, my mistakes, my fears, etc. before I do and yet still consistently loves and protects me unconditionally. At any point I look outside myself and find myself restless, irritable or discontent, it is I, and nobody or nothing else that stands between misery and joy. It is I that stands between fear and faith, anger and acceptance, defiance and compliance, fight and surrender.
I love this page as it reminds me my needs are truly met, and even when I wonder, all will be or is well with me and the world around me. Happy, happy Friday MIP...make this a great day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thanks FT for your service and for all these really great shares. I love and appreciate this idea that what I need is also not in a catalog or any store. Besides for the constant practice of acceptance, I must follow that with detachment. And I try to use detachment with love, but at the moment I am just detaching. It is true that with practicing this program, I do get my needs met. Anyone not in a 12 step program would probably think I'm nuts to say that, but I know you folks get it.
Thank you Freetime for your service and this day's Daily.
It is my experience that people who claim "Money doesn't buy you happiness." have never been truly needy! They rarely if ever have wondered if they can afford the work on their car that gets them to their job... or if they can pay their health insurance this month... or have to forgo filling that medication this month. Whether or not they can get nutritous food on their table. While I can agree with everyone that "Happiness" is an inside job, I will always have the opinion that money could make life a whole lot easier!
For me, my serenity is increased when I lean-in to Acceptance. When I accept what "Is," whether that be in the amount of money I have, or the place I live/work, or my relationships... get out of the dangerous (for me) wishful thinking... that is when I can be truthful with myself,,, and have eyes open to what my HP places before me!
So happy it is finally Friday! Enjoy this day, MIP Family!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
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