The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Today I felt like taking/sharing knowledge from The Language of Letting Go - by Melody Beattie
Getting Through the Discomfort
"Our goal in recovery is to make ourselves feel comfortable, peaceful, content. Happy. We want to be at peace with ourselves and our environment. Sometimes, to do that, we need to be willing to face, feel, and get through discomfort."
She goes on to say that she isn't talking about being addicted to misery and pain... to chaos. Nor is she talking about creating any unnecessary pain. But the legitimate discomfort that can come up as we heal and deal. Sometimes this process hurts. Al-Anon has a slogan for that (of course)... it is, "This Too Shall Pass."
We are strong enough to survive discomfort and temporary feelings of emotional pain. Once we are willing to face and feel our discomfort and pain, we are almost to the point of release.
Thought For the Day: Today I am willing to face my discomfort, trusting that healing and release is on the other side. Help me, HP, be open to feeling whatever I need to feel to be healed and healthy. while I am doing this, I will trust I am cared for and protected by myself, my friends, my Higher Power, and the Universe.
I felt the need to underscore a couple words that stood out to me. First, "temporary." When I am feeling emotional pain, I have to remind myself that the feelings are only temporary. Yes, they may be intense, but they will be worked out and assimilated in time. The other is "trusting." I have come to learn that Trust is a huge issue for me. Knowing that makes it easier to understand my actions, and to be a little gentler on myself. For me, trust takes time... it is just the way it is.
I hope my MIP Family creates the kind of weekend that they enjoy - no matter what that looks like! I think we may get a break in the triple digits here, so I may get my bare feet in the soil (grounding) and do some Autumn garden clean-up!! I also got a new toy for my cats, so will be playing with them later!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
I really love Melody Beattie. Her writing is illuminating p
I most certainly work hard on making my immediate environment comfortabke
I have not yet manafed to creare a healthy diet but I.do make sleep a priority. For ne that is enormous progress.
I most certainly find that as i.move through my.recovery more wil be revealed. There are layers of grief and anger.. The aftermath of growing up within a dysfunctional violently abusive family are cumulative. I have my own part in causing issues that often seem purely external to me
One of those cumulative issues is that I have given other people permission to treart me badly on a day to day basis. One of those persons being my.former roommate who believes in being vicious, mean and deliberately intrusive. At the same time he claims to be supportive patient and extremely giving. Moreover whatever he learns about my life he then uses it as more ammunition to attack me.
Those behaviors are of course thoroughly familiar to me.
In the past his behavior triggered a great deal of memories for me. I was often left absolutely satirated by the #triggers# that set off.
Now his behavior (which can amways be anticipated) can no longer wound and hurt me. Needless to say I no longer give him the ammunituon he so ably ised to hurt me so tenaciously.
While I am looking forward to a time where my interactions with him are in the past rather than in the present. I still have to be patient towards the time I.can bring my dog home.
That time is rapidly approaching and I am preparing for it daily.
I an su glad I have given up the scorched earth approach of ending relationships. These days I.have space, patience and resolve to be willing to look at these issues that triggered so much pain for me. That means for me those issues become resolved rather than a recurring cycle of bewilderment for me. That is enormous progress. Progress made from terrible pain and a deep hurt (especially when I was so ill earlier this year). Neveetheless it is indeed progress and an.enormous paradigm shift for me
I am looking forward to a time where there is not so much hardship in my life. This year has been nothing short of gruelling. Having alnanon as a base has heloed me through this very very hard tine. I.am looking toward a time where the grief leaves me and I will be able to forge ahead with confidence. That time is near.
Maresie
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