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Post Info TOPIC: COURAGE TO CHANGE Sept 26


~*Service Worker*~

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COURAGE TO CHANGE Sept 26


Hello MIP!

Today's reading from C2C is about feelings. The book talks about when the author first came to Al-Anon... the feelings they had, anger, resentment, fear, jealousy were all wrapped up in one adjective, "bad." Al-Anon helped the author to see and to understand that feelings are neither good nor bad -- they are simply a part of the human experience. Al-Anon helped them to accept that some good has come from seemingly negative feelings: anger prompted active changes, resentment and jealousy made them uncomfortable and willing to look deep within and to have compassion for others. Recognizing fear helped them to make conscience contact with their Higher Power. There is no longer a great need to judge or berate oneself because they experience a human feeling.

Today's Reminder:

Feelings may not be comfortable, but that doesn't make them bad. With a change of attitude, I have choices about what to do with my feelings. Anything can be used for my good if I allow it. Recognizing this opportunity may take every ounce of imagination I have, but maybe that's why God gave me imagination to begin with.

"My feelings are neither right nor wrong but are important by virtue of being mine." --...In All Our Affairs

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am grateful to be back in front of my computer! Although the Fires are still burning, I am thankful I was only displaced for 2 days, and no loss of any property or life. Some have not fared this well. I pray for them, and I thank the brave, tireless firefighters every day. Thank you Iamhere for doing my service last Saturday! In regards to today's reading, I found that I "had" to keep myself in anger in order for me to do the things that needed to be done for my and my kid's well-being. Even though I eventually just didn't want to live in that headspace anymore, it served its purpose, and I accepted it... Al-Anon helped me to keep that feeling tamed and in check.

Today when I am overwhelmed with negative emotions (usually sadness), I work on cultivating an "Attitude of Gratitude." It works!!

Happy Saturday to you all! Make the most out of this day, for it will not come again!

&



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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  ~ Mary Oliver

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

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PNP, so sorry you were impacted by the fires -- and glad you are back and safe!! It must be really hard to manage feelings under these circumstances.

Just a few weeks ago, the fire situation had me a bit panicked, even though I am fairly well prepared -- so I know that feeling for sure. The good thing was, though, that it caused me to re-visit my emergency preparedness, and I think I am now better prepared than before. So I think that if feelings propel me forward, not backward or stuck in place -- I can admit that even "bad" feelings have a silver lining.

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~*Service Worker*~

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How true, Freetime!

I am more prepared now, and if truth be told, it was kind of good to understand what was valuable and worth taking, and what I was "OK" with leaving/losing. It some ways, losing most of my physical "stuff" after the separation/divorce has helped me to lead a more uncluttered life. Perhaps a silver lining? Some days I think yes, some days no! LOL!



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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  ~ Mary Oliver

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

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PNP-

so glad to know you are safe!  Thank you for the share.   Understanding that uncomfortable feelings can be just that was a positive realization for me. I used to expend a lot of energy trying to chase them away.  Sort of like when my cat chases her tail and then realizes it is attached to her body!!



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~*Service Worker*~

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{{{PnP}}}. Thank you for your service and share. Great news that you and family are safe. My sisters home burned to the ground 2 yrs ago and she lost everything she had. And its been a rough two years for her, and a couple weeks ago she had to evacuate for a couple days like yourself. I know what shes been through, and Im glad that didnt happen to you.

So speaking of feelings, they can be overwhelming at times. Most often I am able to stay on top of things by using all my program tools and resources. Once in awhile I can still get stuck. Progress not perfection....

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Lyne



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PNP I am so sorry you had to evacuate!!! I cannot imagine what kind of anxiety that would bring uo. When I was 19 I lost all my belingings in a fire. Needlesd to say at that time I was (as akways) surrounded hy oeople who gaslighted my loss. How amazing I have spent a lifetine recreating that pattern I know that a lot of oeople are saying #is it over#. Right now i.am holding tight One of the ways I.survived the last recession was to work in retail. I started part time. Eventually the income from that store was a significant source of income. Every work opportnity dried up in the last recession . This year started out stressful and the hum has kept up. I am working long hours to pay down bills. I have nade progress on that. In the last recession I was in significant debt. That debt had real repercussions on my choices for years. My dog is still not living with me but now it is a matter of weeks before he comes home. I soend a lot of time dealing with my fatigue. This year has required all of ny al anon skills to deal with. I am often on over whelm. Most of that time that comes out in tremendous fatigue. I am glad you were so resilient in navigating an evacuation. I was really not prepared when I had to move out of my apartment. I am still recovering from that Maresie

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~*Service Worker*~

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The subject of emotions or feelings is a good one for me filled with memories of face to face work with my sponsor DonT.  He taught me a bold and powerful way of working them starting with "If you don't like what you are feeling...feel the opposite and get the opposite".  That is and was rocket science.  "If you hate feeling anger...feel acceptance".  If you are having trouble with feeling left out, practice gratitude and so on.  It worked then and still works now. 

This does take Courage to Change my attitude or how I perceive life around me and it works when I work it.   (((hugs))) smile  



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Jerry F


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(((((((((((((((PNP))))))))))))))))))) SOOOO HAPPY to see you back and OK and thank you for this share

I am currently working on all the stored pain that has plagued my body, (I know it has a big thing to do with the back spasms) working thru my old, stuck in my body, feelings....lots of anger and grief but if I don't recognize, accept/acknowledge, investigate, and nurture/nourish me through them, they will stay in my body to torment me with more spasms and other illnesses....so yea, i am in the deepest parts of me, I guess, so I "feel" lousey a lot of late, grief, more memories to grieve over, more discovery, but the good news is that soon, I hope, to reach the "muddy basin" of my life and memory and let the sun shine on all that gangrenous mess and dry it out..... and THEN i can really move on and , no , I will always have feelings, but I don't have to act on them or even believe them, it could be my messed up brain "awfulizing" things, so there are things I can do: step back...breath deep...pray....let go...drop it for now.....get my brain regulated by maybe stamping my feet, washing my hands, doing some tapping to sync my right and left front cortexes, get me regulated THEN when my head is clear, I can see the feelings for what they are and deal with them in a healthy way

I've been doing a lot of research and practicing what works, re: my trauma and the impact it has had on me and yea, at first I was reeeely mad and grieving that this could be done to a helpless child, so I journalled and comforted me through it....and I am talking with my beloved cousin who has been so supportive of me....doing what I can to R A I N me....and it is helping...yea, I feel lousey now, but like pulling a rotten tooth, you feel bad for a while, as the infection and decay are being removed, but then the bleeding hole heals and you feel better.....doing yoga has helped me get more limber, loose, when back tightens up, I get into some yoga poses and good self talk and I feel better almost right away

sorry, I hijacked your post, but FEELINGS are what i am working on with me...letting them come out so I can be done with it...

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Rose, a work in progress!!!

KEEP IT SIMPLE_EASY DOES IT_KEEP THE FOCUS ON ME



~*Service Worker*~

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Such great discussion here about this topic!

Rose, please, this is NOT "my" post, it is "The Daily." I feel it's job is to promote discussion, to provide a sense of direction perhaps, but mostly a place to share ESH. So no apologies necessary! I am glad you are working on your deep-seated stuff... sounds intense, but I know from talking with you that you seek out all the ways you might find help... so it is a good thing!

Maresie - I sure hope your fur-baby gets to be with you sooner than you anticipate! You have had a rough year... enough to put a lesser person down... so I really admire your strength!

I do agree with Lyne... sometimes feelings can be overwhelming at times. I have found deep, diaphragmatic breathing works wonders... I also utilize Tapping. Works just enough until I can call my sponsor!! LOL!

Peace, y'all!


__________________

"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  ~ Mary Oliver

 

 



~*Service Worker*~

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hey PNP, yea, there I go again, doubting me and apologizing and I didn't need to..thanks for helping me see that yea, its OK to share what comes to ones mind....yea, at times recovery can be intense, but for me, if I want to GET through it, I have to GO through it...there are no shortcuts to recovery....the deeper the pain, the deeper the recovery, but the GOOD news is, "this too, WILL pass" I WILL get to that muddy basin i describe and it won't be so bad, my recovery is what I put into it...sadly, i had a lot to process and release, but I am so grateful that I have a safe place in which release it...

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Rose, a work in progress!!!

KEEP IT SIMPLE_EASY DOES IT_KEEP THE FOCUS ON ME



~*Service Worker*~

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Welcome back PnP - so, so glad that you were able to adapt, depart, return and all is well. (((Hugs))) - you were missed!

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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 



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Thank you, Iamhere!



__________________

"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  ~ Mary Oliver

 

 



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Pnp: Thank you for your good wishes I am cuttng back on my workload. The rennovation is almost comoleted and I will be bringing my.dog back then. Due to the Covid 19 situation I am not planning any other major changes. I am not anticipating 2021 will be a god year either. However not being in the middle of a construction site will help immensely. So will having some time off I.am last at a place where i can pay attention to what I need and give myself some respite. I appreciate your validation. This has indeed been a tremendously difficult year for me. I have had to really address sone very destructive patterns and it has been very oainful Maresie

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PnP, so glad you came through safely! I agree, the firefighters do an incredible job



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Paul

"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives."  - Paths to Recovery 

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