Good morning MIP.  Today's reading suggests that in order to recover, heal and find real peace/serenity, we must practice total honesty.  Living with alcoholics, many of us coped with an ever-shifting situation in which our sense of reality changed from moment to moment.  We often adapted by taking whatever part of reality suited us and ignoring the rest.  Over and over, we found ourselves devastated because reality did not go away by being ignored.

The reading suggests our lives will remain unmanageable as long as we pretend that only half of the truth is real.  Sharing honestly is such an important Al-Anon tool.  When we share openly and honestly, we cut through our denial and anchor ourselves in reality.  Even when it's hard to face certain facts, we cease to give our denial power to devastate us when we do.

Reminder:  I can't cope with something unless I acknowledge its reality.  When I am willing to look at the whole picture, I take the first step toward a more manageable life.

Quote from Henry David Thoreau:  "If you built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be.  Now put foundations under them."

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I often hear in the rooms that recovery helps us with denial, which is a key element of this disease.  Many will discuss that they were in denial that the disease is a disease and instead view it as a choice, many others deny how affected we are from living with the disease and still many others deny that they played a role in the disease, dysfunction and/or chaos of the family/home.

My experience is that as I continue to practice all aspects of recovery, more is revealed.  Even with previous exposure to the disease and what it brings, I denied the strength and reach of it, and kept trying to control, change, manage others.  I could expand for days yet there's no need!  One of the first aha moments for me was that all I could actually change or control was me.  My actions, words, reactions, responses, etc. were for me, about me and I practiced doing what was best for me without malice or the like towards others.

What I know about me today through recovery is that I am a work in progress, and length of time or level of effort in recovery do not give me serenity/peace without complete honesty of my role, part, contribution.  When I deny my role, defects, part, I am affecting my growth/healing.  When instead I look long and hard at me and what within me causes me to react and respond to other people, places, things and this disease as I do, I can then begin to explore healthier ways.  My sponsor suggests each time I look outside of me to blame or fix, I am allowing denial to take the lead.  Focusing on self is the tool I need to keep growing, changing, thriving each day combined with trusting in the God of my understanding.  No matter what arrives today, I have the support and tools to handle it with grace, dignity and unconditional love and acceptance.

Happy Thursday all!  I am so, so grateful that God is doing the watering here today...we really need the rain!  Make it a great day and be sure to find/keep your joy!  (((Hugs)))