The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
im unpacking my lovely new futon with which I am very happy and I am using a serrated knife and I am cutting the plastic off and I sliced off the top corner of my index finger like on the very top right of my left index finger I took a piece of flesh along with putting the nail. And it just gushed blood all over the place
Not paying attention, not in the present, rushing and hurrying and I just did it again to myself. So here I am with another wound thanks to the self saboteur I put peroxide on it bandaged it up and it hurts like a bugger I think I can type though Tuesday when I go to work
roommate is outside in her car reading because she cannot sit on the futon because it only carries up to 200 pounds so I had to very gently tell her that per our contract she will have to replace anything she breaks and I put a sign over it saying that it is not safe for larger people and I told her that I would clean off one of the outside nice yard chairs and she can sit on one of them if she wants to use the living room. I gave her two beautiful slip covers that I dont need anymore because this futon is fine with just a cotton queen size throw over it. I did that to sort of make amends which really this is my house and my futon and its something I have wanted to do and I did it. So Ill clean off one of the outside chairs and find some cushions that she can use.
Right now I am hoping this horrible cit does not get infected so Ive got to be careful to keep it clean and not let dirt get on it. My handyman took me in his truck to pick up the futon and I was happy to pay him his wage and I tipped him as well because he deserved it. We took the old couch to the curb Im hoping somebody will want it.
I am using my phone microphone so I hope my post does not look weird. I am trying to talk slow and clear but just wanted to check in and see how everybody was doing. It rained like hell today but Handyman and I managed to get our Project done and tomorrow Im going to Do a food run for the church
so how did you all do today to take care of yourselves?
So sorry to hear of your boo boo, Rose!
Hope it heals quickly.
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Yesterday I had to go over to the house I was staying at to clean up and pack up.
During my way there I most certainly had resentments towards my former house mate. I then lost one of.my sets of keys en route.
This time I chose to go on with the task rather than delay. I chose not to berate myself about this mishap. After all these are unprecedented times.
Needless to say my former roommate is pretty upset that he will not be receiving the check I was giving him every month.
He is not exactly welcoming and happy that I.am leaving. His bank balance us down a big chunk.minus ny check.
I chose not to interact with him very much because I do not have to justify my actions anymore
However I also have to be mindful that I need to negotiate this transaction in civil terms. That is not something I am very good at.
I am negotating recovering from a whole slew of illnesses. Therefore having to go and clean up a room which was certainy not clean when I moved in was pretty difficult. Nevertheless I made a lot if headway on the task. I am pretty close to finishing up soon.
I do not know what will happen with the roommate in the future. He certainly has his challenges ahead of him. So do I.
Making the transition through moving out is pretty difficult at any time. When the relationship has blurred a lot of lines through a number of years it is even more difficult. Al anon has taught me how to be civil and practical rather than focused on my grievances. What a wonderful skill to have in order to negotiate through uncharted territory.
When I came home exhausted I had to go to take a nap. Then one of my neighbors knocked and told me she had found my keys. What a relief. No need to beat myself up at all.
In al anon no matter how difficult the sitiation is I can negotiate it without regret and without guilt. No matter how hard it is and my life is certainly hard right now. Very very hard.
I cut my finger about a month ago. I always "just realized" that I always cut my finger when I am rushing, not fully paying attention, etc.! I never cut myself when I am taking my time, concentrating, being methodical, etc. Gee, how perplexing, LOL. Hope you have a fast and full recovery!
__________________
Bo
Keep coming back...
God, grant me the serenity...to accept the PEOPLE I cannot change...the courage to change the ONE I can...and the wisdom to know it's ME...
What a bummer Rose! How great that you got a new futon, a reliable handyman, and a phone that you can voice-type with! Every time I find myself in a 'way' over an unexpected, self-imposed ouchie, I do find a new level of gratitude for the many modern conveniences of our times. I keep thinking about the pandemic of 1918 and how I would have 'done it'...at least we have TV, stereos, social media, telephones, etc. I imagine I might have gone mad if I were there then instead of here now, but who knows - perhaps I would have adapted just because it's what one does to get by/through.
Take good care of you, the finger and the new futon! Enjoy.....
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
I have burned a finger twice this week. On an electric range. I didn't even think of self-sabotage, but that we are all stressed, and accidents can happen at those times.
Hadn't been keeping up and didn't know that roommate isn't working out, after all. It sounds as if you are taking care of yourself and you have friends you can be with.
Great that you have your new futon! That worked out so nicely. Keep taking care of you, and don't beat yourself up about having an accident, okay?
Hugs,
Temple
__________________
It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread. --Gray Charles
You folks are great to stop in and say hello to me
Finger is quite nasty looking I took off the top quarter of the finger nail it looks like in the cut is about that date it just went like a cross and diagonal I lost a little bit of flesh but I think mostly the finger nail protected me it did go pretty deep though but thank God I heal fast because its already looking better tonight but Im not gonna be able to type for a while because even when I use the other fingers I bang this one a little bit and I just want not to aggravate it.
I hope all of you are doing well and all of you are safe. It was nice to see the sharing and caring but I told you all about my accident and yeah I dont need to beat myself up I guess with all the stress Ive had in my life and this roommate situation I am not surprised that I am not paying attention. And temple you burned your finger on the range? That hurts just reading about it. I hope youre OK.
I hope all of you are doing well and all of you are safe. It was nice to see the sharing and caring but I told you all about my accident and yeah I dont need to beat myself up I guess with all the stress Ive had in my life and this roommate situation I am not surprised that I am not paying attention. And temple you burned your finger on the range? That hurts just reading about it. I hope youre OK.
And IAH I hope your mom and dad are doing better and that the pressure is coming off of you and I so agree about the pandemic of 1918 and they didnt have the technology that we have. We get to do Bible study on zoom with my favorite pastor on Saturday night we can watch service online. Those poor folks back then of course they have each other and families were more together I think in those days so but yeah we are spoiled with all this technology LOL
And a41. I think the peroxide was up there right along side of the original cut boy does that stuff sting
Bo. You are spot on about the Rushing and going to fast. I think I was doing that and also I was talking with my handyman and not paying attention its really weird when the knife went through my finger like that I could feel the sting and it didnt really hurt right away until I realized what had happened and I ran and grab some paper towels and I bled through the paper towels and through three bandages. But actually when I think about it, the pain wasnt as bad as I thought it would be Thats really weird
Maresie. I hear ya about bad roommates. Just keep telling yourself that it will be over with soon and what I have been doing that helps me is just detach detach detach and do things to please me and have fun and just go about my business as though she does not even exist. Although tonight I caught myself watching her rent some thing out in her sink bowl and shes just letting the water run and not doing anything and I told her to not waste my water. I am literally counting the days
PnP. I hope youre doing better my friend. Dont be hard on yourself for being angry and not being able to forgive him right now. A wound is a wound and it takes time to heal and he keeps picking the scab, bless your heart youve come so far in your program you will get through this I know you will
I went to Walmart and got a bunch of Band-Aids in different shapes and sizes because after this I figure I might need plenty of Band-Aids on hand but like Bo said I need to slow down and just pay attention. Quit rushing which really means slow down and pay attention something I have so much difficulty in doing. I know when she moves out and my stress level goes down I will feel a lot better. I am doing little things now to feel better just looking for ways to have fun and enjoy and be grateful for the blessings I do have
