The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
First let me say that I'm not a person who uses social media to connect with others. During this time when many are under stay at home restrictions, I've been receiving texts, emails and calls from people who I haven't been in touch with for some time including some estranged family members. Expectations however are being kept low with family communication.
But I especially want to share about an email I received. "We are doing well and keeping safe following the guidelines. Hope you and those you love are safe and well. Let me know how you're doing." It's pretty much an email that can be sent to anyone simply by changing the first name of the receiver. I have since sent it to a number of people by email, text and letter without "Let me know how you're doing." Without soliciting a response, it's brought some wonderful responses.
How about you? Have recent events caused you to reflect more about others and the part they've played on your recovery journey? Have you reached out too or maybe receive communication from people no longer in your immediate orbit? Any doors opening in a positive way? These are really humbling times at least they are for me. I am experiencing a lot more gratitude memories concerning people who have been and those who continue to be a part of my life's journey. ((hugs)) TT
-- Edited by tiredtonite on Sunday 10th of May 2020 06:42:43 AM
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
Great post. Yes, I have realized that busy-ness is so not needed. That relationships are the true joy I yearn for in life. We lost an Uncle unexpectedly due to a heart attack last week. He had retired 1 weeks prior to his death. His first grandchild is due this summer. Of course, no funeral. We couldnt say goodbye or support his family. My parents live 3.5 hours away. After my uncles death, they showed up at my house unexpected. They needed to see family. And I agree. Our relationship is really good. Life is busy, but priorities need to change. I need to visit them more. I need to make more plans with friends when this is over. Connection is vital for me. For most of us. We have a tendency to say later. Thats no longer acceptable to me. Later isnt promised. Today...embrace today & see those people who lift you up & make you feel comfortable being you.
(((crmans))) I'm sorry you lost your uncle. It is so sad that he didn't get to enjoy retirement and his his first grandchild. I'm glad your parents made the decision to be with you. These death really make us think of our own mortality, the short time we're given. You're lucky to have them. I miss mine. With Mothers Day tomorrow, I have been thinking of them today. I thought of my mom as my best friend.
I'm missing the in person hugs at my meetings and with friends. One of my friends sent an ecard telling me she missed me and hugging friends and can't wait until we can meet to have dinner somewhere again. She speaks very loudly and talks nonstop. She's always up to trying new things and often has interesting things to share with me. I enjoy her, her stories, her enthusiasm. Our friendship has stood the test of time. I've known her many years now. I'm contemplating a Plan B of packing food and parking cars six feet apart and catching up in person. At least we could see each other again. Thanks for sharing. TT
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Surround yourself with people and elements that support your destiny, not just your history.
(((TT))) - lovely share and while I am short on time, this spoke to me! I have been completely off my routine, out of my city/home/element and thrown into a 'next-level dimension' of unconditional acceptance and love...The good news is I have a great group of folks from recovery, high school, golf, softball and large family - and because we are all 'in this together' while staying apart, many have more time to reach out and touch another.
As I ponder the last 2 weeks, I am truly grateful for all who care and love me and my parents. My parents have visited my areas twice a year since moving out of state because they have family and friends. I've hosted them for almost 20 years now and it's just a part of my annual 'life'. So, they've been to softball games, golf course with my gal pals, taco night with my program friends, etc.
While I drove through the night, a group of 4 close friends kept me company all night long thru texting/talking. More texting than talking - checking one me, tracking me on a map, making sure I was safe, etc. Through-out this ordeal, 2 of my 3 brothers have been awesome, and many other family members have offered prayers, support, help, etc. I could go on and on with the outpouring of loving support and prayers from all but you get the drift!
I have honestly not reached out too far beyond my existing circles only because I've instead opted to spend quarantine time improving upon what I've already got. I'm at an age and stage where I truly value who's in my life and feel complete most of the time. This is the year of my 40th reunion and I'm sure it's going to be postponed, which is sad. We had a small class (117) and usually about half come - all I know and all I enjoy. The past 2 weeks, I've barely had time to shower and keep everyone in the know on my parents' recovery progress and that's OK! I'm ready to go home, do my quarantine and see what feels right for the next thing! I've donated blood once and plan to keep doing so, assuming I'm clear of the virus and able - I have no symptoms but certainly have had extensive exposure.
Before heading out of town, I made a point to reach out to a newer member at least once a week....sometimes a couple of newer members. I've decided that the best way for me to stay grounded during this pandemic is to stay close to what comforts me and that's usually recovery, people in recovery and those in my circle. These are certainly different and difficult times for most of us - doing what works to keep one grounded and centered really matters - no matter what that is! I've missed being here and had a break tonight - and am grateful for that. Love and light to all - keep doing what works for you!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
