The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I've been reading old posts here lately. Last night I was reading some from 2005 and it kinda surprised me that they weren't really that much different than current ones.
When I came here I felt so alone and like my situation is somehow worse or different than others. But reading old posts shows me otherwise.
I found comfort in that. I also found comfort in the way this program has been/stayed the same throughout the years. The ESH shared then is the same,as well as the slogans,the steps,etc.
I guess I expected it to be like being told that coffee is harmful but then hearing it's good for you(or eggs,wine,whatever). Or as different as landline phones vs cell phones. It's consistent though,it's stable,it's reliable and predictable.
And I like that,especially when everything else in my life seems so chaotic.
Lovely share SF and I so, so relate and agree! What's so lovely for my recovery and I is that when I do reach out, I can/do receive support and ESH. The more I practice, the better my days feel and are. It really does work, as designed, when we work it! Glad you're here and a part of my journey!! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Very, very true...a friend of mine said her struggle is the same every single day, perhaps different triggers and stresses, but conceptually the same struggle...Just for today, she doesn't drink...and she does so one day at a time.
For me, every single day -- I stay on my side of the street, I pay attention to my side of the street, I clean my side of the street. I focus on making healthy decisions, and living my life the right way. I make sure I check my motives. I focus on not controlling, not forcing my will, and not wanting to be right. I focus on not accepting unacceptable behavior. And more. Just for today, and I do so one day at a time. I live my life with clarity and integrity.
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Bo
Keep coming back...
God, grant me the serenity...to accept the PEOPLE I cannot change...the courage to change the ONE I can...and the wisdom to know it's ME...
Sunny, I also appreciate how the program is consistent and reliable and has been working for so many years. It is comforting to hear the same readings that open and close every meeting, the rituals like saying "hi" to each person, etc. It's wonderful to be able to count on something.
I remember when my life was chaotic, I would be rattled when a meeting did something different than I was used to -- after all, each meeting is autonomous. I also remember thinking I could make edits/improvements in the wording of some of the traditional readings that I thought weren't clear enough. As I have worked the program and recovered more, I find myself more flexible and appreciative of differences in various meetings, and not needing to "fix" the program to help imaginary others who I thought needed my help to make the readings easier for them. But I still appreciate the traditions that stay the same, even though we can have slight differences within the same general format.
It is very true. I saw it in my Nar-Anon meetings (way back), and I see it now. It is one of the main reasons I really embraced, "What did I want?" and Acceptance this time around in the Programs. It was so, so hard to begin to think of myself first! My needs, my wants (besides, the "I want my old husband back'). But I feel it was essential for me to figure that out, otherwise I could be living with the addictive chaos for the rest of my life! It was super hard to accept that I had no control over that chaos... just my response to it! I still see some chaos - in the fringes (b/c we share a kid), but now I am better at not engaging, and accepting that it is "Not my monkey's, not my circus." I am not perfect (far from) but I work on not trying to "Fix," and not Controlling anyone/thing but myself, and I must say, I am forever grateful for the tools and the support that Al-Anon provides!
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"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
Thank You!! Sunny....I am so grateful for your post. It reminds me that when I keep working what works; it will continue to work and I will continue to be happy, joyous and free. (((((mmmmm)))))
But I still appreciate the traditions that stay the same, even though we can have slight differences within the same general format.
