The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
This has been the topic my sponsor and I have been talking about. She is getting older and less mobile and theres a battle going on inside her because shes young at heart and wants to do do do. She has the awareness of her limitations but hasn't fully accepted yet. She knows shes in the middle of a growth spurt. The acceptance will come when it comes. I think it's a process that will set her free. It's like shes shedding her skin and its uncomfortable and she is fighting the reality. When she accepts the reality and sits in it long enough I believe there and then is peace and serenity. The action part? I wonder. Sounds like a world of possibilities. Change can occur then. It's like the serenity prayer says. Maybe this program comes down to acceptance. Sounds so simple lol x
Hey elcee - great to see you and Happy New Year! My experience is that acceptance really often is the answer in my life. I don't have to like what's happening or even embrace it, just accept it. Awareness, Acceptance, Action combined with JADE is very freeing for me as I used to want to be right, wanted to change the world and certainly wanted to be heard.
Today, I can practice acceptance with my A as well with all others. I have to be extra careful to make sure my awareness does NOT include judgement, simply because I practiced being 'judgy' in the past. Judging others was an unhealthy reaction for me towards others that I feared. The three A(s) also help me have less fear, simply because I do believe the God of my understanding wants me to be happy, joyous and free - hard to do when I am focused beyond my own mind, body and spirit.
So agree - sounds simple! It does get easier with practice, practice, and more practice! (((Hugs)))
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Hi LC great slogan i can readily identify with your SPONSOR . I am SO GRATeEUL for this powerful program as it has provided me with the tools to keep showing up and living my life
I found that when ever I resist acceptance, it is usually fear based, because I don't want to admit that I cannot control. Doing a mental inventory of the situation, sometimes helps be root out what is holding me back, then I do some research into how I can better understand the situation and look at it in a more healthy light.
I know that as I age, am now 67 yrs. old, I worried about a number of health issues that I did not want to come to terms with, no one wants to think about the end of there lives.
I decided to embrace every ache and pain, because as I see it, I earned them, just take some aspirin and move on already!!! Those wrinkles and gray hair are a mark of years of wisdom, I no longer color my hair or wear makeup. I see have visions of a younger me but am now happy with the older wiser me as well.
So nice to chat with you!! Hope all is well!!
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"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it
does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown
Thanks for LC and for all great shares above. Ah yes, the 3 As. Life could be so simple if only I could practice all these tools perfectly, which of course, I cant. I find with acceptance, I just have to re-visit it all the time. I did so this morning. My A goes to one A.A. meeting a week. She goes to a large meeting where she doesnt have to talk. Am I judging? Oh yes. And I need to stop. She does not acknowledge her alcoholism in spite of professionals recommending this action to her for years. Thank God, the light came back on this morning. She is not going to do her life MY way; its going to be HER way. And I need to ACCEPT if we continue with this 28 year long marriage. Everyday presents me with challenges, and thats why I need to stay close to alanon. Lyne
Lovely share, LC... ... I am turning around, and realising that I am no longer a newcomer! I am 69 next week... and have spent over half my life in Alanon. I still have another programme I am active in, and passionate about. I was very lucky- and it was touch and go three years ago. Along with spiritual, physical and emotional freedom I found economic freedom, as well. So we can live a comfortable old age. Travel will become less important as we grow older- and we have done bits of that. Curiosity about the rest of the world.
Every so often my SO and i have a show-down, hissy-fit sort of conversation... which clears the air. I wanted to take in a couple of foreign field workers- to help pay for the next holiday. In NZ most of these workers are university graduates doing an overseas jaunt. So, now we have a couple here- for 6 weeks.
It works our well. They self-cater... but we share meals, when it suits. and they fit in around our family stuff well. It is actually a lovely cultural exchange.
But the ~action~ aspect of the three 'a's impresses me. I do attend a local F2F group- and plan to attend 10 or 12 meetings a year. They have their own GR, secretary and treasurer. I chaired a meeting in recent times- because the chairing is rotated every week- in most of our local groups. All two of them.
Get a lot of extra learning here. We compare notes here, and offer and get support, par excellence.
. I am SO GRATeEUL for this powerful program as it has provided me with the tools to keep showing up and living my life
... I am turning around, and realising that I am no longer a newcomer! I am 69 next week... and have spent over half my life in Alanon. I still have another programme I am active in, and passionate about. I was very lucky- and it was touch and go three years ago. Along with spiritual, physical and emotional freedom I found economic freedom, as well. So we can live a comfortable old age. Travel will become less important as we grow older- and we have done bits of that. Curiosity about the rest of the world.