The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Greetings all, IAmHere is seeing to an ill friend. I loved C2C and ODAT, so went with both as they work so well together.
ODAT:
The challenge of life with an alcoholic can lead us in complete desperation when we tackle it without a Higher Power or program. Though we may not know how, or why, in AlAnon we find that we can find peace when we put our trust there rather than solely in our own intelligence, strength, and efforts. To the degree that we turn our life and will to someone[thing] greater than ourselves, our burdens will be lightened.
C2C:
We appreciate praise or recognition occasionally, but when we expect and seek it as a requirement for our action, then we may become owned by expectation and resentment. AlAnon suggests that serenity and peace come from our spiritual efforts and not manipulating external events for recognition.
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When my own desperation led me to AlAnon, I was not being honest about my motivations, unreasonably expectant and demanding of all of my actions, and thought I knew what was best for me and others in my life, particularly the alcoholic. I also was at one of the most desperate, unmanageable times of my life.
AlAnon has helped me realize that was not by coincidence. When I try to control that which I cant and shouldnt, especially when I am seeking recognition and praise for my efforts, I am funding a spiritual and emotional Ponzi scheme. I will fall apart, its only a matter of time.
Instead, I can incorporate the 12 Steps of AlANon into my life, create (in my case) and learn to trust in a Higher Power rather than try to run the world and the lives of others. To the extent that I do, todays readings promise that is how much peace and serenity I may feelwhat an incredible gift!
Have a great Thursday!
__________________
Paul
"...when we try to control others, we lose the ability to manage our own lives." - Paths to Recovery
Thank you Paul for the daily, your service to MIP and your service to my commitment here! My apologies to the MIP family this was later than morning time - it's been an interesting week/day.
Self-reliance for me contributed greatly to my insanity - unintended and certainly unplanned. With average/above average intelligence, tons of street smarts and quite a bit of experience, I just kept trying to beat the disease in those I love on my own. It was not just unsuccessful, it was damaging, and down-right destructive to me, family relationships and other relationships beyond family. I became a shell of who I used to be, and really wasn't a pleasant, healthy person - understanding now why others stepped away.
In recovery, practicing what's suggested one day at a time, I feel I've been given a new life. I suggest new life because many of the defects I uncovered in my inventory work existed prior to the disease in my case, and my unhealthy coping ways also were present long ago. They were certainly magnified and further exploited when faced with the disease directly in those I love.
It's easier for me today to believe in and trust in a power greater than me! I no longer face issues or problems looking to blame/shame myself or others, instead turn towards the God of my understanding willing to be open to what's happening and what comes next. Choosing this, one day at a time, allows me to be of maximum service to others instead of making all things about me.
My friend with cancer continues her stay in the hospital, fighting a staff infection in her blood. Any thoughts/prayers you can throw our way would be greatly appreciated. She and her husband are exhausted, battling cancer, one day at a time for almost 10 years....this current situation is almost more than they can bear. The infection is persistent, stubborn and not responding (yet) to antibiotics so we remain hopeful yet realistic. I am grateful I can spend most of the day with her, giving her company, some laughs, great fellowship and give her husband a much needed break. (((Hugs))) to all.
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Thank you Paul for your service! "spiritual and emotional Ponzi scheme.' Like that visual!
Most recently I have renewed conversations with my HP. When I find I am struggling, frustrated and trying to passively manipulate, I realize I am off track. I need to return to the guidance of a power....that actually HAS power!
The same applies to the 2nd reading......when I am looking for recognition and praise for all my efforts....I am off track.
IAH.....I know this is such a difficult time for you with your cousin's passing and your very ill friend. She is so fortunate to have the support system you are all providing her. Blessings to you!
Thank you Paul for stepping in with enlightening readings and all the above shares. Relying on myself while in desperation mode simply did not work and made things worse. Im still amazed how I got sucked in to the deep abyss without realizing the damage being done by alcohol.
Of course now with program, I know better and have great tools and support to help me heal and cope with life. I trying often to re-make my commitment to turn my will and my life over to the care of the God of my understanding. And boy does this help! Lyne
Thank you Paul, boy did I need to hear those readings!!! I have been trying to tough it out on my own and it's my fault, I will get back to working the program and to lean and rely on my spiritual beliefs more.
__________________
"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but it
does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart". ~ unknown
