The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Happy Thursday! Today's reading from C2C is about Step 8. The author had a long standing issue with guilt for words and actions against others and was able to release herself from the guilt through Step 8.
Step 8 suggests we make a list of all people we have harmed and become willing to make amends to them all. This step provides a means to make a black/white list all memories, pain, who, etc. For the author, the list made the memories and pain manageable compared to them floating around in their head.
There is no action beyond the list and the effort to become willing to make amends to them all. This step allows us to consider the harm we have cause, the guilt we have brought on self and the desire to do what is possible to clear it all away!
Reminder: Guilt is a burden that keeps me from giving myself fully and freely to the present. I can begin to rid my mind of guilt by quietly submitting where and when I have done wrong to people, including myself.
Thought from As We Understood . . .: "Al-Anon has shown me another way of living and I like it. Life can either be a burden and a chore or a challenge and a joy. One day at a time I can meet the challenges of life head-on instead of head-down."
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I wasn't excited about Step 8 as I had trust issues, and wasn't sure how documenting 'my part' could help me move forward. I did not believe or understand how shedding the past gives us the ability to be/stay present. I was rarely, if ever present before recovery - I was either stuck in the past or projecting a future - both were a waste of time.
Today, through practicing recovery, using the tools and making my best effort to live one day at a time, I actually enjoy my life. There are ups/downs, as anyone has, yet I find myself better equipped to manage 'life' as it happens. I don't have to have the spinning mind wheel regurgitating the past, I don't have to plan, plot, and scheme a scenario filled with projection - I can just face it, respond and trust my healthier mind/heart and HP. Sure simplified many things for me!
Happy Thursday all - been golfing and now done! Sorry for the late post - I intended to do this last evening and just got distracted...Make it a great day!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Hello IAH Certainly appreciate your service.. STEP 8 appeared quite formidable when I FIRST EMBARKED ON THIS JOURNEY.. I agree practicing the principles, using the tools helped me to make the list as honestly as I could and lo then become willing to make amends. i have done many Step 8s in my time in program and each one becomes easier
