The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I believe that honesty is the way to go! I know sometimes that we tend to be brutally honest. If we are honest w/ ourselves first then to God it becomes easier. I try to practice honesty but sometimes I get caught up w/ doing things & living on egg shells sometimes that I have to be or am dishonest w my AH. I buy things & don't tell him, I hide things,insisting that it is OK as long as I am spending my own money. I guess I have to remember that I am not my dad's wife but she set a terrible example for me. She was in need of Al anon or Alateen when she was younger. Her daughter was finally able to get help after her addiction. She was basically a kleptomaniac. I feel for her but anyway that is the only way my step-mom really knew about the 12 step program. She didn't learn anything from me at all. I guess she wasn't interested in what the program means to me. I could really have gotten more "honest" w/ her. I am grateful I had her for 43 years & she is no longer in pain.
So, if I am going to be honest, like every seems to say lately. I really think that is an ignorant statement. I know that some of us have strived & have thrived in the journey towards wellness. It isn't easy but we all have to give it a chance.
Hang in there! If you are honest your heart & head will get better!
Yes, honesty is good. I have learned that sometimes for me it's best to be honest quietly as in, not say a thing. That way the stuff doesn't hit the fan and end up back in my face. Each situation seems to call for individual analysis.
(((Kathleen))) - I believe that honesty is necessary for forward growth. I also love that Al-Anon suggests we focus on progress, and not perfection. I am also grateful I have a sponsor that I share everything with - she helps me understand what's real, what's judgement, what's deceptive and what's important. I can make mountains out of molehills in my mind, and it's a gift to have another to help me keep the anthills right-sized!
Keep doing you - it looks good on you!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene