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Post Info TOPIC: Courage to Change October 31


~*Service Worker*~

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Courage to Change October 31


In today's Courage to Change, the author reflects on fear. The author realizes that they have been making choices while living in fear - something seemingly mundane will happen, like a loved one seeking sobriety, a friend upset with something that was said, or the grocery store runs out of chicken, and the panic sets in. The author feels attacked by thoughts of disaster. Then, they try to put a bandage on the situation to make it better and do something rash or fruitless. The author reflects on fear - that fear can become a power greater than themself. Thanks to the program, the author realizes that their HP is greater and more powerful than their fears, and they do not have to let fear rule them. 

Today's reminder: Al-Anon is a program in which we find spiritual solutions to the things we are powerless to change. Today, instead of seeking relief from fear by trying to do battle with it, I will turn to my Higher Power.  

Today's Quote: "That the birds of worry and care fly over your head, this you cannot change. But that they build nests in your hair, this you can prevent." Chinese proverb

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Fear. Avoidance of confrontation. Fear of confrontation. So much of my life has been dictated by these things. I realize now that fear sits at the core of my struggles, which some in my home group refer to as "Al-Anonism".  Why did I tolerate the intolerable? Why did I try to compromise and make life with an active addict work? Because I was afraid of the confrontation, afraid of what it would mean to set my life up all over again, afraid of what would happen to pets, afraid that what the addict said about me while defending the addiction was true, etc. etc. Now, it seems the one thing I wasn't afraid of is the impact it would have on me. This year I am learning about the strength that can be found in trusting friendships. I'm learning that fear thrives in silence and secrecy, and that by speaking openly and honestly with those I trust, the fear loses its hold on me. 

I just love today's quote - what a nice take on accepting what we cannot change, but changing the things we can.  



__________________

Skorpi

If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present. - Lao Tzu



~*Service Worker*~

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Good Morning Skorpi Thanks to Alanon I now have the tools that prevents the birds of fear and worry from building nests in my hair . The slogans, meetings the serenity prayer are indeed powerful weapons in my arsenal that helps me to live with  a little wisdom,courage and serenity.
When I think of my fear n the past, I find that I always converted my FEAR into anger as it made me feel powerful and appear in control'
No longer
Thanks for your service



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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud


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Thank you Skorpi for the daily and your service. Thanks to you both for your shares and ESH. I feel I allowed fear to rule my life greatly for way too long. It still creeps in at times, yet today, I have tools to make a choice how long I allow it to stay around. I was afraid to fail, afraid to act, afraid of change, afraid of all staying the same - I could list many, many more.

It took me a long, long while to accept and realize that faith and fear can't co-exist within me. If I am fearful, I've set aside my faith - even for short bouts of time. I also for some unknown reason falsely ASSume I have some level of control over that which I fear, and most of the time, I do not.

I am grateful that today, when I feel discontent, restless, fearful, etc. I can open my toolbox and seek to change me. I don't want any nests in my hair - much prefer when the birds are mobile and just passing by.

Happy Halloween to one and all - golfed today and headed to hang with my little people shortly. (((Hugs)))

__________________

Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging.  Pause before assuming.  Pause before accusing.  Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret.  ~~~~  Lori Deschene

 

 



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thank you Skorpi...I have been fear based all my life...it is like my "flight or fight" the pedal got stuck and I am still trying to lift it up....fear i won't be able to take care of me...fear of "whats gonna hit me next??"  I spent my life as a prey animal and I can't seem to shake that feeling that I am just NOT safe...not now...not any time...they trained me to be afraid because back then, it was (the threats/unsafe environment) was REAL....what I would not give to be able to reverse or at least manage this better.....oh well...ODAT



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Rose, a work in progress!!!

KEEP IT SIMPLE_EASY DOES IT_KEEP THE FOCUS ON ME



~*Service Worker*~

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Thank you all for your ESH!
I read this yesterday, but honestly... was not ready to post about it!!

It is hard for me to realize how much fear ran my life... as Iamhere said, fear of failing, afraid to act, afraid of change, afraid of my life staying the same, afraid of always feeling so sad. It was very, very hard for me to embrace the saying, "Fear cannot thrive where Faith resides," b/c I had lost my faith.

So I am working on that. I am also working on always using Practice the Pause. I am finding that by doing so, it allows me to hear my inner voice...which many times can ban my fear!

((((Rose)))) Sending you rays of positive energy!! I read your posts and sometimes wonder how you are able to manage the effects of your past... but then I keep reading and see that you are so brave and resilient!! You keep on keepin' on! Keep being an inspiration!

__________________

"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend

"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness."  Mary Oliver

 

 

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